


Mr. Sandman

by redrelrose



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Criminal Loki, Loki Whump, Loki and Thor Are Not Related, M/M, Organized Crime, Slow Burn, Unreliable Narrator, con artist loki, thor whump
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2020-01-22
Packaged: 2021-01-15 06:41:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 70
Words: 109,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21249092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redrelrose/pseuds/redrelrose
Summary: The family you are born into is not always the right one. But sometimes, our families of choice can be even more destructive.Loki is a con artist with a traumatic past. Thor is his mark.AU loosely inspired by Imposters





	1. Luke Sutcliffe

Loki sits in a shadowed corner of the bustling London bar. He doesn’t want to draw attention to himself. Not yet. 

His poison green eyes twitch back and forth, a metronome flicking between the comers and goers that pass through the entrance. None of them receive a glance that could be construed as anything more than cursory. With his gaze firmly occupied, tracking every new face at the entrance of the overpriced establishment, his mind turns to reciting his new mantra: 

_ Tonight I am Luke Sutcliffe. I am a young British man, fresh out of business school and just finding my stride. I am suave, even tempered, soft spoken, and witty (but not  _ ** _too_ ** _ witty). It is my dream to work for the most successful advertising company in the world: Asgard.  _

The poison eyes flick, flick, flick over dozens of faces. 

_ I am not here looking for company. I am far too respectable and sophisticated to allow a perfect stranger to take me to their bed. No, I am here for the only scotch in London that isn’t watered down. _

Flick, flick, flick. 

_I am confident and ambitious, but inexperienced and naive._ _I am a man of few words. I am submissive. I require guidance from someone strong, and capable, and--_

There. The beat of the metronome breaks, the mantra forgotten. He’s found him.

*******

Thor steps into his favorite bar, exhausted and in need of a familiar routine after returning from his business trip to Edinburgh. He takes a vacant seat at the oak bar, nodding at the girl behind the counter. She smiles back and pours his usual. Scotch, neat. 

“I swear it’s the only scotch in all of London that isn’t watered down,” says a deep, silken voice to his right. 

Thor turns to find one of the most beautiful people he’s ever seen occupying the seat next to him. He definitely wasn’t there when Thor sat down. He would have noticed. The man's words catch up to him and he grins. “That’s what I always tell people, but no one ever believes me,” Thor replies. “Nice to finally meet someone with taste.” He sticks his hand out. “I’m Thor.”

“Luke.” The beautiful man takes his hand. His fingers are thin, almost delicate, but even longer than Thor’s. Thor smirks to himself - you know what they say about the size of a man’s hands. Or was it feet? He discards the thought.

The beautiful man has a firm grip and pumps Thor’s hand twice. Before Luke can pull away, Thor flips their hands so the other’s is on top and kisses the back of it. “Luke, it’s an absolute pleasure.”

Luke retrieves his hand with a considering look, eyes like variegated emeralds flitting over Thor in a quick once-over. Thor grins under the attention. Luke turns his gaze back to the neat drink in front of him, identical to Thor’s. He takes a tidy sip, not even grimacing at the burn. Oh, Thor likes this one. 

Luke makes no move to continue their conversation. He seems to have deemed their interaction complete. Thor frowns. That’s not how this usually goes. Still, he takes the opportunity to really look at the man. The rest of him is as long, slender, and pale as his hands. Even sitting, Thor can tell he is tall, possibly almost as tall as himself. He looks younger than Thor by a few years, maybe 25. He’s wearing slacks and a button-up that look cheap but well tailored. His black hair is impeccably neat and curls just below a sharp jaw. He has cheekbones that Thor wants to slice his fingers on and the greenest eyes he’s ever seen, bespattered with flecks of gold and turquoise. 

After throwing back the last of his scotch, Luke glances at him again. Thor doesn’t bother to disguise his staring. “Can I buy you another drink, Luke?”

The appraising look is back on the lovely man’s face as he seems to take Thor’s measure. Finally, his head dips in a slight nod, lips curling up in a tiny smile. Thor beams, full force, and motions for two more scotches from the bartender. 

*******

The giant blonde Oaf is probably the easiest mark Loki’s ever had. Since he first laid eyes on Loki he hasn’t looked away once. It’s the most blatant and uninspired flirting he’s ever witnessed. Is this man really next in line to take over Asgard? This is quickly shaping up to be one of Loki's more boring jobs. It’s not any fun without a challenge. But he doesn’t get to choose the marks. At least he gets to enjoy the nice view that is Thor for the duration of this job.

His plan for this one is simple. He’s had it worked out since the first time he read through Thor Odinson’s file. Loki will play Luke, who is soft spoken and wide-eyed, fitting right into Thor’s taste for submissive partners. But unlike Thor’s multitude of one night stands, he has to stand out. So he’s also sophisticated and somewhat intelligent, sharing in Thor’s tastes and opinions. But he has to draw out Thor’s interest. So he plays hard to get. Luke must appear to be fighting his attraction to Thor in order to maintain his own dignity. But then he needs to stoke Thor’s interest enough for it to become infatuation. So he’ll become forbidden fruit, off limits. That won’t deter Thor, it will only make Luke more desirable. So Luke will reject him outright, but Thor will continue trying to seduce him anyway, like the spoiled brat he is. 

Once Thor’s infatuation is at its peak, Luke will confess his feelings for Thor, crying and telling him that he could not bear to be just another one of Thor’s conquests. After salivating over Luke for so long, it should be no trouble to get him to make declarations and promises that Luke is different and will be his one and only. Then, and only then, will Luke will fall into Thor’s arms and allow himself to be taken, moaning and writhing like a submissive twink. This will cement Thor’s interest by fulfilling his need to be in control. If all goes to plan, Thor should marry him shortly before he succeeds Odin as owner and CEO of Asgard. The ‘coronation’, of sorts, is scheduled for six months from now. He needs to win Thor’s heart by then.

*******

Thor has been talking with Luke for hours. Normally he would have asked him back to his flat by now, but Luke is far more interesting to talk to than his usual fare. He keeps his words concise, but what he says is always smart and poignant. They agree on nearly every topic that has come up, from scotch to politics, philosophy to movies. 

That being said, it’s getting late and he has to be at work early the next morning. Not to mention that Luke’s neck is so very long and just begging to be licked. He interrupts whatever Luke is saying, having quite lost the thread of the conversation once his eyes found Luke’s clavicle peeking out of the recently loosened collar. “Would you like to come back to my place?”

Luke’s eye twitches almost imperceptibly. Oh, Thor can tell he’s annoyed at being interrupted, but won’t let himself show it. It’s adorable. He lets his hand fall to Luke’s thigh, massaging into the surprisingly developed, long, corded muscles. “We get along marvelously on just about everything so far. But I can think of one more way I’m pretty sure we’ll get along even better.”

Luke leans into him, earning a soft moan from Thor. Luke’s thin lips brush against his ear, sending a shiver through the larger man. “Oh, I can think of more than one, Thor.” 

At that, Thor growls and turns his face to capture the sinful mouth. But Luke’s finger intercepts, landing on Thor’s lips in a mockery of a ‘shushing’ gesture. 

“Alas, I have an early morning tomorrow. So I will have to decline.” With that, Luke stands, slips his blazer on, winks, and strides out of the bar before Thor can even comprehend what has happened. 

Was he just rejected? 

  
  



	2. A Taste

Thor drags himself into work the next morning. He didn’t drink enough to be hungover, but he lost enough sleep going over and over his interactions with Luke that he might as well be. The man was stunning and they seemed to match up so perfectly on everything. Why had he declined Thor’s proposition? There was no way he had truly just been worried about his early morning. What could be so important as to justify denying their chemistry and obvious mutual attraction?

Thor tries to banish all thoughts of the beguiling man as he makes his way to his office. He has a job to do and can’t spend the day brooding over one failed hookup. He unlocks his office and sets to filing all the paperwork from his trip. Before too long, there’s a knock on his office door. “Come in.”

His father opens the door. “Welcome back, Son. I trust your trip went well?”

Thor grins back at Odin. “It went exactly as we expected. They are eager to partner with us.”

“Good, good. I look forward to your debrief at the 10:00 meeting.” Odin moves to go but turns back at the last minute. “Oh, I nearly forgot. I have good news. I’ve hired a new assistant.”

Shortly before Thor’s two week trip, Odin’s assistant had come into a large inheritance and moved somewhere tropical. Thor has forgotten where. Hell, he doesn’t even remember the woman’s name. Something with an A?

“He’s been a big help this last week since he started. I see potential for him to progress in the company.” That’s a big endorsement, coming from Odin. “I haven’t gotten the opportunity to really show him around yet, though. I’ve been so busy. I was hoping you might give him a tour of the building this morning.”

Thor groans internally. The last thing he wants to do on his first day back is play tour guide. But he knows better than to say no to his father. “Of course. I just need to finish up this paperwork. Have him come by in half an hour.”

Odin nods and walks out of the office, closing the door behind him.

Exactly half an hour later, there’s another knock. Thor gets up to answer it, preparing to get this tour over with as quickly as possible. After swinging the door open, though, he stands there gaping for what he vaguely recognizes as Too Long. Standing in front of him, looking every inch as beautiful as he had last night, is-- “Luke!”

“Tho - Mr. Odinson! I - I’m Odin’s new assistant…”

Thor cannot believe his luck. He had been prepared to return to the bar every night until he found the mysterious man again, but here he is, delivered right to Thor’s door. And he’s Odin’s new assistant, so he’ll be here every day!

Luke looks at least as stunned as Thor feels. He’s staring at Thor with a mixture of shock and confusion, but a small smile is somehow managing to survive the onslaught. He looks far too endearing and delectable for his own good. So, like any reasonable person would do in his place, Thor grabs Luke by the lapels, quite literally dragging him into his office, and locks the door behind them. He pushes Luke bodily against the door and proceeds to claim the kiss that he was denied last night at the bar.

Luke lets out a ridiculously adorable squeak as Thor’s mouth seals over his. He’s stock still for long seconds as Thor sucks on his lips. Just when Thor thinks he’ll be shoved off, Luke moans and presses into Thor, delving his tongue into the larger man’s mouth and taking control of the kiss. Thor groans and presses Luke even tighter to the door.

When they finally part for air, Thor stares into Luke’s emeralds, loosening his grip on the thinner man. Who, he notes, is indeed only a scant inch shorter than himself. Thor has just gotten his breath back and is ready to go in for another kiss when Luke suddenly gives him that shove he’d previously been expecting. No longer having anticipated it, he unbalances and stumbles back into his desk, sending several things crashing loudly to the floor.

“What are you doing? We are in the workplace!” Luke hisses.

Not moving from where he’s braced against his desk, Thor stands wide eyed and panting. “I… I’m sorry. I do not know what came over me.” Bit of a lie. His bottled up lust is what came over him. “I was not expecting… you.”

Luke clears his throat and straightens his suit. “Yes, well. I will admit to my part of the fault. However, this cannot happen again. Last night we did not know each other as coworkers. Now that I know you to be Odin’s son, I cannot under any circumstances become involved with you. I take this job very seriously. It has been my dream to work for Asgard for years and I will not allow a fling to sabotage my position here.”

Thor swallows both the surprising sting that comes with Luke’s use of the word “fling” as well as his disappointment at his rotten luck that this intriguing man turned out to be his coworker. He saw in Luke last night intelligence, passion, and poise. If there was ever a person built for success, it’s him. And if he were to begin an affair with Thor and they were found out, Luke would likely be accused of trying to sleep his way to the top. Normally, Thor probably wouldn’t have let that stop him. But there is something about Luke that makes Thor want follow the man’s every direction. He demands a certain respect that Thor almost feels the need to kneel before. More than anything, he feels an almost desperate desire to please the man.

Thor straightens up from his sprawl against the desk, absently smoothing out his clothes and keeping his eyes low. “You are right. I did not think before I acted.” He looks up at Luke again, attempting to communicate his sincerity. “I have no desire to see you sabotaged and I realize how it would look for us to… become involved. I apologize for my rash actions. I will respect your wishes and pursue you no further.”

***

Loki is stunned. After all of that, Thor is just… giving up? This is not part of Loki’s plan. Becoming Odin’s assistant is supposed to make Loki the forbidden fruit, only more tempting for being off limits. Then, once Loki tells him ‘no’, Thor is supposed to stubbornly continue to attempt to seduce him despite Loki’s rejection. Thor’s file had indicated he was not the kind of man to put someone else’s desires over his own. But Loki’s just dangled the forbidden fruit in front of Thor’s nose and all it took for him to leave it alone was, what? Luke’s desire to keep his shitty job as an assistant?

And even after he’d just gotten a taste! Loki knows for a fact that he is a spectacularly good kisser. Phenomenal. Irresistible. Unrivaled. There is no chance Thor hadn’t enjoyed it. Loki stubbornly convinces himself that giving into Thor’s kiss, or assault really, was calculated. It wasn’t that he’d gotten caught up in it himself or, heaven forbid, enjoyed it. Nope. Calculated. Although he did slip up in taking control of the kiss. He will have to remember to relegate himself to the submissive role with Thor in the future. The Odinson likes his partners submissive.

“Well, that is certainly… decent of you,” he forces out.

“My father has told me that he expects to see you advancing in the company. He does not say such things lightly. He sees potential in you. And I witnessed the same last night. I will not stand in the way of you realizing your dreams.”

Loki just about gags at the poetic declaration. What, does this guy think himself some prince of old? Well, such declarations are not what Loki wants to hear. He needs Thor’s interest to grow, not to be so quickly snuffed out. For now, Loki will just have to play along and try to find new openings to regain Thor’s interest.

“I appreciate your understanding. And your kind words. I wish nothing more than to succeed here at Asgard.” Loki offers a small smile.

Thor smiles back at him. “I do hope that you will accept my offer of friendship, though. I very much enjoyed our conversation last night and would like to further get to know my new coworker.”

Loki grits his teeth and says in his most pleasant voice, “Yes, I would like that very much.”


	3. A Beautiful Sound

This job is a little different than Loki’s usual. His signature con is gaining people’s trust and access to their entire lives by marrying them. Who is a person more desperate to trust than their newly wed partner? And who has more access to a person’s life than their spouse? The trust which Loki gains through marriage is his ticket to getting whatever information or items he is tasked with obtaining for the Order.

There’s also the added benefit that this allows him to gain legal rights to all of their finances and accounts. And, as all of Loki’s marks are quite wealthy, this provides a nice source of income for the Order. With this job, though, there’s even more pressure to marry Thor. And it has to be accomplished by a very specific date. It’s fundamental to the plan.

Ronan explained the assignment to Loki, just as he has with every other. He’d handed Loki a thick file on his new mark: Thor Odinson, son of the owner and CEO of Asgard, Odin Borson. Odin is in possession of the Tesseract, one of the so-called ‘gems’ their employer desires. They don’t know where Odin keeps it. They do know that the only people likely to be privy to that information are the members of Asgard’s board. Loki is tasked with finding a way onto that board.

He can’t very well commit years to working his way through the ranks of Asgard. There is, however, a precedent for getting onto it without climbing the corporate ladder. When Odin became CEO, his wife was also given a spot on the board. Therefore, the best shot for Loki to become a member is to marry Thor, Odin’s heir. This means that Loki absolutely must get Thor to marry him. They decide this needs to happen before Thor becomes CEO in six months. The ceremony is the one time when every person in Asgard will be gathered in the same place, leaving an opening for someone to sneak past their defenses.

Odin’s assistant is paid off in order to open up the position. Loki is the first to apply. Or, well, Ronan applies for him. And after Loki dazzles Odin in the interview, he is hired before any other candidates even have a chance to submit their resumes. He begins work while Thor is away on a business trip. He orchestrates their first meeting to be on the night before Thor returns to the office.

Ronan secures Gamora a job as a custodian for Asgard. Nebula is tasked with convincing Thor to hire her as a gardener. From what Loki understands, she failed. Which means she isn’t on the case. Loki wonders if she will end up in the hospital again for this.

***

Loki’s teeth remain gritted as Thor gives him the Asgard tour, introducing him to the innumerable staff and showing him every last corner of the thrice damned building. As he effortlessly feigns interest, Loki’s mind is busy running through possibilities. Has Thor really lost interest? Or is he truly as honorable as that? No, that’s definitely not it. According to the file, the man is a pig with a history of taking what he wants. Then maybe he’s just pretending to be honorable as a front? Perhaps he’ll continue to try seducing Loki once he thinks he’s lulled him into a false sense of security. Or perhaps he intends to jump Loki when he least expects it.

Eventually, Loki has to admit to himself that Thor has just lost interest in seducing him. Over the next couple weeks of them working together, Thor regularly gives Loki messages for Odin, taking the opportunity to strike up conversation, and stops by Loki’s desk outside Odin’s office to chat after meetings with his father. However, through all of this, he acts with the height of professionalism and is perfectly friendly without any sign of ulterior motives. He truly seems to just want to be Loki’s friend.

This has made Loki unspeakably angry. How is he supposed to get the fool to fall in love with him when he doesn’t seem to have even the slightest bit of lust left for Loki? Oh, Loki tries to bait him. But every time it seems to backfire.

On one occasion, right after Thor goes into the bathroom, Loki “accidentally” spills coffee on his shirt. He follows Thor into the bathroom under the guise of needing to get the steaming, sopping fabric off his skin and change shirts. Instead of helping Luke divest himself as Loki’d intended, Thor takes up the noble role of guarding the door, hardly even sparing a glance for the half naked man in the room with him.

On another occasion, Loki drops a large armful of papers outside Thor’s open office door. He bends down to retrieve them each individually, with his ass aimed to give Thor a perfect view. Instead of taking advantage of said view, Thor rushes to help, his eyes on the papers rather than Loki and his, if he does say so himself, stunning ass.

On top of all this, Gamora is being terribly unhelpful by sending him an increasing number of entirely unnecessary looks full of warnings for consequences he is quite aware of already. Despite that, he can at least admit that he is somewhat grateful that it is her and not Nebula here. Nebula would not hesitate to report Loki's lack of progress immediately. Gamora, though, he’s fairly sure will wait a while yet before tattling to Daddy. Still, Gamora’s long looks are putting him on edge.

So yes, Loki is angry and frustrated. He was supposed to reject Thor, causing him to chase after Loki to get what he wants. Instead, it feels like the opposite has happened. For the first time in Loki’s years doing this, his mark is not interested in him and has Loki chasing after him instead.

So Loki improvises. He looks for opportunities to sneak into Odin’s office and hack into his computer to search for any clues in regards to the location of the Tesseract. But he keeps getting distracted. Thor is the most infuriating person he’s ever met. He seems to have made it his own personal goal in life to annoy Loki into insanity. Several times over his first couple weeks on the Odinson job, Loki slips up, his frustration bleeding through.

On one such occasion, Loki thinks he’s ruined the entire job.

Thor and Odin are just exiting the older man’s office after having been inside talking for the past 45 minutes. Loki is exultant. He’s been hoping that the two would go to lunch today, leaving Odin’s office unoccupied. However, as they pass Loki’s desk, Thor breaks off from his father and approaches.

“Hey, Luke. How is your morning going?”

Loki curses internally. Thor has been dogging his steps for days. Every time Odin leaves his office, Thor magically appears. This leaves Loki no moment in which to sneak into Odin’s office to search his computer for information, which is the one useful thing he can do if Thor refuses to fall for him.

Loki puts on a pleasant face and attempts professionalism. “It’s been a busy, but good, morning. Your father is quite patient with me.”

Thor laughs. “From what I hear, there’s no need for patience. He tells me you’re excelling in your position.”

Loki affects bashfulness. “He’s too kind. As are you.”

“Or perhaps you’re better than you give yourself credit for.”

“I do hope you are right.” Loki smiles, patience wearing thin. Why can’t this man just forget the damn job and notice Loki’s shapely figure? “And how is your morning going?”

“Oh!” Thor slaps the desk and Loki has to suppress a surprised jump. “You’ll never believe what happened this morning.”

“Mm?”

“You know Tyr, don’t you? Big, hairy, ugly guy? Well, in this morning’s meeting he was wearing these ridiculously tight pants.”

Loki feels his eyebrow twitch. Odin’s office is sitting right there, unoccupied and ready for rifling, and Thor is loitering here wasting all of Loki’s short window in which to take advantage of it.

“And they were purple. That’s not important to the story, but I think it will help with your mental image. I mean, Tyr in tight, purple pants. Picture it. Are you picturing it? Looks stupid, right?”

Loki bites the inside of his cheek and nods.

“So he was wearing these godawful pants and strutting around the room like he was the one running the meeting. He wasn’t. I was. But karma caught up with him. You’ll never guess what happened. Do you want to guess? Oh, I’ll just show you.” Thor leans over and makes a loud, obnoxious ripping noise.

Loki’s frustration peaks and he snaps, “For fuck’s sake! How have your ears not fled your head for being held hostage to your incessant prattling without respite?”

There’s a terrible moment where they just stare at each other, perhaps equally stunned by Loki’s outburst. He is horrified with himself. But he’s been listening to Thor’s endless jabbering without making any progress in his plan for almost two weeks now! And the five months he has to secure Thor’s devotion will slip by quickly. Even Loki has his limits for stress.

Loki holds his breath as he waits for what Thor will do. Surely he’ll advise Odin to fire him. And perhaps kick his ass. Loki fights the looming hyperventilation. He’s just ruined this job, hasn’t he? He’ll be punished for this. Whatever happened to Nebula will pale in comparison.

Thor breaks down laughing.

Loki blinks. And blinks again. “I’m sorry, I--”

“Excellent jest!” Thor exclaims. “That is one of the most sharp-tongued insults I have ever received. I will cherish those words, my friend.”

Loki stares, stunned, at the laughing man. Thor isn’t mad? He thought it was… funny? Loki feels his face flush, embarrassed at his own outburst and flustered at Thor’s compliment. He finds himself pleased, not only because his break in character didn’t ruin his cover, but because it is rare that someone compliments his wicked tongue.

However, while this incident is resolved without major consequence, it happens several times more and Loki starts to become rather disturbed at his own failures. He keeps forgetting to keep up the act and rein in his own prickly personality, all due to his sheer frustration. He has never lost the interest of a mark before and no one has ever been able to rile him up quite the way Thor can.

***

The first two weeks of being coworkers and friends with Luke is… difficult.

It has no doubt been fun. Thor has greatly enjoyed getting to know the man. He is smart, witty, and great at his job. Thor agrees with Odin that it is only a matter of time before Luke is promoted to a more suitable role.

Thor has very nearly convinced himself that his pursuit of Luke’s friendship is no different to how he would act with any person who occupied the desk right in front of Odin’s door. In fact, it would be rude not to stop and talk with Luke after leaving his father’s office, since he walks right by him. Of course, he is quite ignoring the fact that he can’t even remember the name of his father’s previous assistant, who had also occupied that desk.

Alas, while Thor has enjoyed their time as coworkers and friends, Luke remains sinfully gorgeous and unfairly charming. It doesn’t help that Thor can’t seem to get his mind out of the gutter. In their first week working together, Luke goes through the terribly humiliating and physically painful experience of spilling hot coffee all over his chest. Thor, being the terrible man that he is, cannot look at the man stripping himself out of his wet shirt without springing major wood. So he retreats, like a coward, under the guise of guarding the bathroom door.

On another occasion, Luke is so overloaded with papers from Thor’s father that he loses his grip on them, scattering them across the floor. Thor, still a terrible man, stares at the sculpted ass presented to him until he shakes himself, realizing how perverted and rude he is being. He runs to go help collect the papers as atonement.

Trying to be 'just friends' with Luke is exhausting. He truly wants to respect the man’s wishes, but it is difficult to resist the most tempting creature he has ever come across. And it isn’t enough that Luke is gorgeous. No, Luke has to go and actually be fun to hang out with. Anyone would struggle to remain strong under such circumstances.

However, Thor is a man of powerful will and can control himself. That is, until he begins to notice something else about Luke that makes him like the lithe man even more. It is a gradual realization, but he comes to the conclusion that Luke wears an emotional mask much of the time. He seems to feel a need to keep very strict control over his actions, words, and expressions. Thor imagines Luke must tire, worrying so much about what people think of him that he has to put up a front. But every now and then, Thor gets a peak behind the mask. And he’s intrigued by what he sees.

Since they’ve become friends, Thor has been exploiting any chance he gets to talk to Luke. A man can only be so strong after all. This includes taking advantage of every time Odin leaves his office, leaving Luke’s desk unwatched by the patriarch. On one such occasion, Thor is at Luke’s desk telling him about how Tyr ripped his pants at that morning’s meeting. Luke is acting less receptive than usual, barely acknowledging that Thor is talking. So Thor takes it up a notch, talking louder and really emphasizing the funniest bits in an attempt to get Luke’s full attention.

Suddenly, after a particularly loud reenactment of Tyr’s seam ripping, Luke barks, “For fuck’s sake! How have your ears not fled your head for being held hostage to your incessant prattling without respite?”

At first Thor is simply stunned. Then a bit hurt. Then Luke’s words replay in his mind and he can’t hold back a snort. Then a full-on laugh. He’s pretty sure that was the most complicated insult he’s ever heard fit into one sentence. So Luke can be funny too, even if he doesn’t intend it.

Thor catches his breath as he notices the rather horrified look on Luke’s face. The poor man must think he’s about to be reprimanded. Thor hurries to reassure him. “Excellent jest! That is one of the most sharp-tongued insults I have ever received! I will cherish those words, my friend.”

Thor says the words to put Luke at ease, but he finds them to be true. This moment has given him new insight into a different side to Luke, one that somehow seems to suit him more than his usual polite demeanor. Thor wants more of it. And when Luke blushes bright red at Thor’s reaction, it only makes him all the more determined.

Thor makes it his primary goal to get past Luke’s walls. He finds that the most effective method is annoying the stoic man until his mask cracks. With each new fissure in the facade, Thor feels a shining sense of accomplishment. He has begun to think he is finally getting to see more of who Luke really is rather than who he wants people to think he is. It feels special and Thor is honored that Luke is beginning to feel comfortable enough with him to express himself. He learns that Luke can be sharp tongued like a serpent and unpredictably tempered like a cat. No one has ever made him smile more.

***

Loki’s mood is significantly improved when he finally gets his opportunity to sneak into Odin’s office.

Thor stops by Loki’s desk shortly before noon. “Hi Luke. Uh, any plans for lunch?”

Loki smiles pleasantly. “I brought a salad.”

“Ah, that sounds good. That’s good. You know, if you want--”

“Thor,” Odin interrupts his son as he exits his office.

Thor spins to look at his father. “Yes?”

“How about you come to lunch with your mother and me today? She’s been complaining that she doesn’t see enough of you.”

“Ah, yes, of course,” Thor nods. He turns back to Loki. “Anyway, one of these days you and I should grab lunch. You know, talk about how you’re liking Asgard and all that.”

“Mm, yes.” Loki is too busy celebrating inside his mind to bother with more of a response. Odin and Thor are having lunch, which means both of them will be out of the office. And they will surely take at least an hour. That’s a full hour that Loki will have to snoop around Odin’s office.

Once they’re gone, Loki waves down Gamora in her funny little custodian outfit. She casually walks over from where she’d been wiping windows and switches to straightening the baskets of paper by the printer. Loki hits print on a random document and heads over to retrieve it. He speaks without looking at Gamora. “I need you to stand guard.”

“Got it.” She heads over to empty the trash cans from the cubicles nearest Odin’s office.

Loki takes a quick look around to ensure that everyone in their area has gone to lunch and strides quickly into Odin’s office. It’s unlocked. Loki knows because Odin has tasked him with keeping an eye on it anytime Odin eats out. Loki makes a B-line for the computer, quickly unlocking it with his first shot at guessing the password: Frigga’s birthday. After just 20 minutes of searching, he is able to uncover a likely location for the Tesseract. He finds a floor plan detailing each level of the building. On the basement level of Asgard there is a safe.

Just as he locates the information, Gamora signals that someone is coming. Then she’s rushing away from the office to pretend that she’s cleaning something elsewhere. Loki exits out of everything he’s opened on Odin’s computer and quickly walks back out.

Heimdall, one of Asgard’s board members, is walking toward Odin’s office. He stops when he sees Loki emerge. “What were you doing in there?” he asks in a deceptively neutral tone.

“Oh, I was just borrowing a pen.” Loki holds up the one he still has in his hand from scribbling down notes from Odin’s files. “Mine ran out of ink.”

Heimdall looks at him with that same neutral expression for several beats. “You should keep more than one pen at your desk.” Then he strides past Loki into Odin’s office, picks up a folder full of papers, and walks back out. He doesn’t look at Loki again as he leaves, just gives a pointed look at the sharpened pencil sitting on Loki’s desk.

Damn. That man is far too observant. Loki will have to keep an eye on him.

Loki pulls Gamora aside the next day as she’s taking the trash from Odin’s office.

“I need you to scope out the lower floor. Odin’s computer contained a floor plan that showed a large safe in the basement.”

Gamora shakes her head. “Loki, I’ve already been down to the lower floor. I can’t get in. The door requires a key code to get inside.”

“I didn’t see any codes in Odin’s files. But it’s possible I missed it what with Heimdall interrupting me. He’s suspicious of me, by the way.”

Gamora frowns. “I gave you more than enough warning. You couldn’t come up with a good excuse in that time?”

Loki opens his mouth to retort, but Gamora talks over him.

“Anyway, you have to get back into that computer. We need that code.”

“I know.”

Loki resolves to find another opportunity to get into Odin’s office. Preferably when Heimdall is not around.

***

Thor paces back and forth in his office, stopping every few steps to reach for the doorknob and retract his hand immediately after. He’ll do it today. He’ll successfully ask Luke to lunch. In a non-creepy way. Just, as friends. Friends can have lunch.

He takes a deep breath and finally grasps the knob. He yanks the door open with just a little too much force, if the surprised face of Karen in the cubicle across the hall is anything to go by. He clears his throat and walks with purpose toward Luke's desk.

Luke is typing away on his laptop, mostly likely filing paperwork for Odin.

“Luke. Hey.” Luke startles ever so slightly. Thor clears his throat and continues more gently. “I, uh, was wondering if you’d like to go to lunch.” Luke looks at him a bit oddly. Thor shuffles, feeling off-footed. “With me. Today. Uh, now.”

Luke’s face resolves into a finger-tingling smile. “That would be lovely.”

***

The end of their second week as ‘friends’ finds Loki out to lunch with Thor at a cozy cafe. It’s the most progress he’s made in the entirety of those two weeks. Thor may have only asked him to lunch as coworkers, but it still signifies a particular interest in getting to know ‘Luke’, which is better than nothing. And Loki will take what he can get at this point.

As they wait for their food, Thor boisterously tells Loki the story of the time he and his college friends nearly got arrested for trespassing.

“We were trying to save a raccoon from a tree.”

“What possible reason could you have had for that?” Loki is genuinely perplexed.

Thor rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “We thought it was a rabbit.”

“How--?”

“We were drunk.” Loki raises an eyebrow. Thor chuckles and reemphasizes, “Very, very drunk.

“And tell me, how did this ‘rabbit’ thank it’s saviors?”

“Well, Volstagg got the worst of it. He shielded Fandral with his entire body,” Thor demonstrates with exaggerated movements,” because Fandral was being an absolute baby.”

The story is utterly ridiculous and Thor is so wrapped up in his retelling that he seems completely unaware of their surroundings. At one point, Thor’s animated gestures are so exaggerated that a server has to dodge out of the way of his failing arms.

Loki stifles an undignified squawk of laughter a split second too late, breaking character. Luke is meant to have a soft, tinkling laugh to maintain his seductive and submissive image. Loki quickly composes himself, returning to his far sexier 'Luke' laugh. He is a stickler for details and is never one to break from character. He silently berates himself for yet another failure as Thor continues his story.

***

Thor is telling Luke the story of the time he and his friends mistook a raccoon for a rabbit. Luke seems quite amused by the story. His laugh is a soft, tinkling sound that makes Thor feel warm. However, when Thor gets to the part of about Fandral beginning to weep in Sif’s arms for the safety of the poor rabbit, Luke lets out a loud, harsh guffaw that ends as abruptly as it began. Luke seems embarrassed, but Thor is quite certain he’s never heard a more beautiful sound in his life.

He immediately wants to hear more of Luke’s genuine laughter. He thinks on it and realizes that the story that had caused it was about Thor’s friends. That gives him an idea. “How would you like to hang out with my friends and me tonight?”


	4. A Bitter Medicine

Loki walks into the same bar as where he’d orchestrated his first meeting with Thor. 

Earlier in the day at lunch Thor had invited him to hang out with he and his friends. He told Loki to meet them at the bar around 8:00pm. Keeping true to Luke’s punctuality, Loki arrives at 8:00 sharp. The bar is already fairly busy but he sees no sign of Thor, so he makes his way to the bar to wait. 

“What can I get you?” a raspy voice asks. 

Loki looks up to find Nebula behind the bar. Not in the hospital after all. “So he let you back on the case then?” Nebula just stares at him, expressionless. Loki sighs.

He orders Luke’s scotch, grimacing at the taste. Loki hates scotch. 

He waits for a good 15 minutes, regularly scanning the crowd surrounding him for a certain face, exactly as he had been the first time he was here two weeks ago. He loses himself in a bitter metaphor about how he’s still right at the beginning, absolutely no progress made, worthless fucking--

Ah! There. A tall blonde man is sidling up to the bar, just three seats down from Loki. The man leans over the bar to order his drink and then turns to recline with his elbows on the bar, eyes skimming across the room. Loki recognizes him from Thor’s file: Fandral Dash, one of Thor’s closest friends. Also, notably, bisexual and an even bigger slut than the other blonde. Loki glances around again. There’s still no sign of Thor. He senses an opportunity to finally make some headway. Jealousy is a bitter medicine, but a controlled dose of it may be just the thing to rekindle Thor’s interest. 

Loki glares at the couple occupying the two seats between Fandral and himself until they take the hint and leave. Then he relocates so there is just one empty seat between he and Fandral. Loki is still wearing Luke’s standard slacks and button-up, but he now undoes the top three buttons of the deep green shirt and rolls up the sleeves. He pours his scotch out into an empty bottle sitting on the bar and keeps the newly empty glass in his hand. Then he waits. 

It doesn’t take long for Fandral’s scanning eyes to land on Loki. And when they do, they cease their scanning. Fandral immediately moves to the empty seat between them, looking as eager as a puppy dog. He eyes the empty glass in Loki’s hand. “My, my. It looks like you’re in need of a new drink. What’ll it be?”

Loki only makes him sweat for about two seconds before responding, “Scotch, neat.”

“Ah, how sophisticated.” Fandral orders Loki’s drink from Nebula. “May I just say, you are simply bewitching to look upon.” He places a dramatic hand on his breast before declaring, “Fandral, at your service,” and actually bowing. Well, bowing as much as one can while sitting on a bar stool. 

Loki amends his previous opinion that Thor possessed the poorest flirtation skills he’d ever seen. Fandral certainly has him beat. This is just painful. 

Loki gives a sweet, bell-like laugh. “Goodness, you’re making me feel like a princess.”

Fandral straightens up from his bow and beams. “Ah, but surely you are no princess, but a mighty king. For I feel as though everyone in this room should kneel to you.” 

Loki can’t decide whether he is more disgusted by this Fandral’s pandering or pleased at the thought of everyone kneeling to him. He decides it should really be everyone’s natural inclination to kneel to him already. Therefore, his disgust wins out. “Oh dear, you flatter me.”

“I say only what I know to be true. But tell me, my liege, what might I do to earn the pleasure of knowing your name?”

“Luke!” It is not Loki who says it, but Thor. He is pushing through the crowd towards them. Loki notes with no small degree of satisfaction that Thor looks more than a little panicked, glancing back and forth between Fandral and himself. Progress made.

*******

Thor and his friends have a long tradition of meeting at this bar “around 8:00” every friday evening. Of course, when they say 8:00, they really mean more like 8:30. Thor had automatically told Luke to meet them ‘around 8:00’ and realized too late that the punctual man would probably have arrived at 8:00 exactly. Cursing when he remembers that he doesn’t have Luke’s phone number, he runs out his door at 8:10. 

After wandering around the bar for several minutes trying to find Luke, Thor finally spots a shock of black hair. When he gets closer he sees that Luke is not alone. Fandral is already with him. Oh good, Luke hasn’t been left been waiting alone! His excitement about getting to spend time with Luke outside of work begins to overtake his worry. Then he sees Fandral lean far too close to Luke with a look Thor knows all too well on his smarmy face. His panic returns full force. “Luke!”

Both men look up at Thor’s shout. He pushes through the last few people and ends up standing right behind Luke’s seat. He clamps a hand on the brunette’s shoulder with a strained grin. “I’m so sorry, I should have told you that none of us would arrive by 8! I left my house as soon as I realized my mistake.” He turns his gaze to Fandral, giving him a sharp look. “I do hope you were not bothered by anyone while you waited.”

Fandral quickly puts as much space between Luke and himself as possible. “Luke? Oh dear, you’re Thor’s --” 

“Coworker!” Thor interrupts loudly. “Yes, this is my coworker, Luke.” Fandral, along with Thor’s other friends, already know about Thor’s not insubstantial obsession with Odin’s assistant. They’ve certainly heard him talk about Luke often enough. 

“Yes! Coworker. Thor’s dear, lovely coworker who had not gotten a chance to tell me his name yet, before you arrived.” Thor relaxes minutely. So Fandral hadn’t known who Luke was when he’d hit on him. Still, Luke had not looked to be entirely unreceptive. 

Sif, Hogun, and Volstagg all arrive soon after. They find a table in a quiet corner of the bar. Thor is unhappy to see Luke take the seat next to Fandral but he tries to put it out of his mind. Luke is his just his friend and he’s free to do as he pleases. 

*******

Loki is, remarkably, not having a terrible time. Admittedly, a large part of that is the sense of accomplishment that has come with discovering that Thor is not as unaffected by him as he pretends to be. Since seeing him flirt with Fandral, Thor has kept a jealous eye on the two of them all night. Of course, Loki has no intention of flirting with Fandral further. Or, at least, not beyond the occasional lingering touch on the arm, just to watch Thor squirm. He got what he needed. Thor has shown his cards. He still wants Loki. 

While that may be the bulk of the reason behind his good mood, Loki cannot deny that the company is less than horrible. He’s never really had any friends of his own, so it’s always interesting for him to see how people interact with theirs. Thor’s friends are as mismatched as could be. Fandral, despite being cowed by Thor’s ire earlier in the evening, shows himself to be a complete drama queen. Hogun says little and moves his face less. Volstagg is the oldest of the group, often bragging about his three young daughters. And Sif. Sif does not like Loki. Interestingly enough, she is Loki’s favorite out of the group. She reminds him of Brunnhilde. He wonders how Brunnhilde is doing now.

Thor and his friends all have many stories about the ridiculous things they’ve done over the years that are, quite honestly, hilarious. And of course, there’s Thor. Thor, who has been gazing at him with stupid, happy puppy dog eyes every time Loki can’t quite hold back a genuine guffaw. Loki stops really bothering to hold them back at all.

Even Sif starts to warm up to him, eventually. At one point in the evening, Hogun makes Thor laugh just as he takes a drink, causing him to spray half the beer in his mouth all over Loki. Loki snaps at him, “You Oaf! Do you require tutelage in swallowing?” Loki is mortified. Why can’t he control himself around this man? 

Thor, of course, turns beet red, but Sif laughs uproariously, thumping the table. She lifts her beer to him, saying, “You know, Luke, I had you pegged as a dishonest creep when we first met, but you’ve proven me wrong. Truer words have never been spoken. Thor is indeed an ‘oaf’ incapable of swallowing.” Yes, Loki likes Sif.

Nebula has started to serve Loki water colored to look like scotch. It wouldn’t do for him to get drunk on the job. Thor and his friends, on the other hand, start to get spectacularly intoxicated. He even hears Hogun giggle at one point. 

Volstagg lets out a belching laugh and says loudly, “Luke, where are you hiding all those drinks you’ve had? A skinny little thing like you should be on the floor by now!” 

Loki smirks at him. “Oh Volstagg, you just don’t want to admit that I’m outdrinking you. Come on, swallow some camels.”

The others all gawk at him until Thor asks, “Did you just tell Volstagg to… swallow a camel?”

Are they idiots? It’s a common enough saying. “Yes, you Oaf. Swallow some camels. You know, admit you’re wrong.”

They all stare at him for a beat longer before breaking down in hysterics. Fandral claps him on the back. “Oh, my dear Luke! You must surely be the only one of your kind.”

Once the alcohol really begins to take over their systems, they decide it’s time to start dancing. It’s not really a dancing kind of bar, but the music is loud and there’s space enough. Loki, far too sober for this, follows them out onto the floor and stands to the side. He watches as they all begin to jump and wiggle in an uncoordinated tangle. 

A group of young women join in, asking the various members of Thor’s group to dance. Fandral and Hogun seem to be too drunk to notice the women trying to dance with them. Volstagg, being happily married, politely declines several offers. Sif, though, grabs a lithe brunette by the waist and begins to grind with her. She dutifully flexes as the woman admires her biceps. Loki is surprised to see Thor declining offers just like Volstagg. 

He sees an opportunity. He moves into the crowd of dancers, worming his way between Hogun and Fandral, to dance beside Thor. Loki ungelates his body in a graceful rhythm with his arms raised high. He twists and turns, ensuring that Thor gets a good view of each of Loki’s assets in turn. He subtly shifts closer and closer to Thor, until their arms or hips brush every few beats. He knows how much Thor has had to drink and he’s pretty sure his inhibitions are pretty low. That, plus the possessive streak that Loki’s flirtation with Fandral sparked, has Loki pretty confident in what Thor’s next move will be. 

He’s not disappointed. Before long, he feels large hands tentatively grasp his hips from behind. Loki leans into the touch, which tightens as Loki begins to swirl his hips in a tight figure eight. He leans his head back on Thor’s shoulder, turning his face to bury it in the blonde locks. He inhales, smelling spring: something earthy and fresh, overlaid with a slightly floral scent. 

Getting lost in the sway of the music and the soft smell, he nuzzles closer. At some point his hands find their way onto the thick thighs aligned behind his own, squeezing, pulling them to slot against his. The wide hands run up his lean torso. One of them brushes an erect nipple through his thin shirt, sending a shiver through the thinner man. At some point, Loki’s eyes have closed. They fly open when he feels lips on his neck. Thor’s head is bent over Loki’s shoulder and he’s mouthing at Loki’s pulse point. Loki vaguely realizes that his pulse must be hummingbird fast under Thor’s lips. 

Loki comes back to himself all at once. What is he doing? He had only meant to give Thor a bit of a tease, enough that he could blame it on the alcohol, before pulling away. He hasn’t curated Thor’s interests enough beyond physical attraction to be moving into this stage of the plan yet. If Thor gets what he wants before falling for Loki, he may just consider it an itch scratched and move on. No, he has to secure Thor’s undivided attention and affection before he lets their relationship turn sexual. 

Instead, he completely forgot himself and is just as rock hard as the length currently pressed against his ass. Loki panics, yanking himself out of Thor’s arms. Without looking the man in the eye, he mutters that he has to be getting home and quite literally runs for the door.


	5. Fix This

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos are appreciated! They keep me motivated

Loki can’t believe how much he’s fucked this up. This isn’t like him. And he had thought this was going to to be such a simple job. Instead, he’s broken character countless times over the past two weeks. And tonight at the bar he was worse than ever. After a couple hours of being immersed in the rambunctious group of friends, he’d totally lost control of himself. He had constantly been either snapping at Thor and calling him Oaf or cracking up in a most unattractive, un-Luke-like laugh. He’d gotten lost in the mood, forgetting that those aren’t his friends. He doesn’t have any friends. He’d allowed himself to cackle and snark, letting far too much Loki show through the Luke veneer. Then he’d gone and fucked up more than he’d imagined possible. Thinking he was teasing Thor with a bit of a dance, he had actually gone ensnared himself! He has been denying his attraction to the obnoxiously muscled man admirably up until now. Then one dance and he had actually forgotten for a few moments that this wasn’t real. 

On top of it all, by panicking and running away he’s probably made things even worse. Now Thor’s ego will be wounded. He might even be angry. Those aren’t emotions conducive to fostering affection. Loki resolves to spend the weekend in ‘his’ apartment, allowing time for Thor to cool off and for himself to figure out how to fix this. 

*******

Thor is angry. He keeps going over the events of last night in his mind. They’d been having such a fun time. Luke had seemed more relaxed and genuine than he’d ever seen him. Thor had even relaxed over Luke’s flirtation with Fandral, since it seemed to be more about humoring the man rather than any real interest. And Fandral had mostly behaved himself after learning who Luke was. 

Then Thor had gotten to dance with Luke. He had lost himself in the moment and completely forgotten his promise to not pursue the lithe man, his friend. He had taken advantage of Luke’s inebriated state and broken that promise. So yes, Thor is angry. He is unspeakably angry at himself. 

Luke had clearly been upset too. As soon as Thor started the really heavy petting, Luke had bolted. He probably feels betrayed that Thor would go back on his word like that. And now Thor has no idea how to make things right. He will have to apologize, of course. He knows that much. But he can’t think of any apology that could mend this. 

He decides that this can’t wait until Monday when they’re back at work. No, he has to make this right as soon as possible. And ideally not in a building full of their coworkers. He logs onto his computer and opens Asgard’s personnel files with every employee’s contact information. There are certain perks to being the heir to Asgard. He types in ‘Luke Sutcliffe’ and finds what he’s looking for. 

*******

Loki has his hands fisted in long blonde hair that smells like sunshine. He yanks it, hard, earning him a long groan from the hair’s owner. The man’s moans turn rhythmic, becoming harsh and loud, and then truly awful as they resolve into an obnoxious ringing. Loki wakes, recognizing the sound of his phone. He rubs his eyes, trying to banish the dream and ignore his erection. 

He grabs the still ringing phone, not bothering to check caller ID since no one besides Gamora or Nebula would be calling. “H’lo?” he slurs sleepily. 

“Loki.”

Fuck. He should have checked caller ID. He sits up, hard-on gone and suddenly quite awake. “Sir,” he replies. It occurs to him then. Nebula was at the bar last night and she never misses an opportunity to tattle to Daddy. She must have seen Loki leave Thor high and dry. 

“I hear you’re not doing your job.”

“I assure you, I am. It’s just taking a little more time than I’d anticipated. I made a lot of progress last night--”

“Don’t lie to me, boy. I know that’s your thing, lying, but I suggest you reserve that skill for your mark. You have some damage control to do and I expect it to be done promptly. Or else you will find yourself removed from the case.”

Loki swallows. Nebula had somehow kept herself from being removed from this case and, therefore, avoided another hospital visit. She’d been given a second chance on this job. Loki will not be so lucky if he fucks this up. “I understand.”

“Yes. You do. Now go fix this.” The line goes dead. 

Loki throws the phone at the wall. The back pops off and the battery falls out, but it’s not broken. Pity. He screws his eyes shut and wills his eyes to stay dry. He has ever been quick to tears, which is often helpful when he needs to gain sympathy from a mark. However, when he is just Loki, not Luke or whoever, he does not like this trait in himself. It makes him feel weak and out of control. 

He sits in bed for a long time, trying to calm down. He’s panicking and he needs to stop. He attempts to bring his breathing back from the edge of hyperventilation. He rolls his shoulders, trying to relieve the painful clench in his muscles. 

The doorbell rings. Loki groans. Can this day get any worse? He uses the toilet and gargles some mouthwash before making his way to the door in hopes that they’ll give up and leave before he gets there. 

*******

After finding Luke’s contact information, Thor tries calling him. It goes straight to a generic voicemail. He checks his watch. It’s nearly 11:00am. He debates for all of five second before typing the address under Luke’s name into his phone’s GPS and heading out to his car. He cannot leave things between them as they are now. 

Luke lives remarkably close to Thor. It’s less than a five minute drive. Thor finds the flat easily. It’s on the ground floor and has its own entrance. He double checks that he has the right one and rings the doorbell. He waits for quite a while. He’s about to try ringing it again when the door at last swings open. 

Luke is wearing black silk pajama bottoms with a black tank top, his feet bare. His hair is curling more than usual, clearly free of the product he usually styles it with. He looks like he just rolled out of bed. Thor rakes his eyes up the lean form, hungrily devouring the sight before him. Then he catches himself. This is exactly what he came here not to do. Why can’t he keep his mind out of the gutter with this man? He feels even worse when he notices that Luke’s eyes look red. Has he been crying? 

“Luke, I - I’m so sorry about last night.”

Luke looks at him with an expression that comes very close to confusion. “You’re… sorry?”

“I know, it’s not enough and I have no excuse. I’m a terrible person and you deserve a better friend than me and I spoiled a perfectly wonderful evening and you were laughing so much and I’m such a dick and I promised not to push you into anything you don’t want--”

“Stop.” At Luke’s quiet command, Thor shuts his mouth. He wonders again at this strange compulsion he has to obey Luke’s every direction. “Just… come in,” Luke sighs. Thor does.

  
  



	6. Breathless

Loki opens his door to find Thor waiting for him. The man looks on edge. Is he here to kick Loki’s ass?

“Luke, I - I’m so sorry about last night.”

Loki blinks at him. That can’t be right. What would Thor be apologizing for? He’s not mad, he’s-- “You’re… sorry?”

Thor starts talking at 100 miles per hour. Loki is still shaken from waking up from a sex dream about the man currently standing in front of him and then being threatened and having to bring himself back from the edge of a panic attack. He can’t follow the jumble of sounds pouring from Thor’s mouth. The word is out before he can catch it. “Stop.”

Thor blessedly stops talking and watches Luke with sad puppy dog eyes. Loki suppresses a groan. Satan help him. The man is unfairly adorable. “Just… come in.”

He steps aside to let Thor in and shuts the door behind him. The flat is small, just one room containing a bed, a small seating area, and a kitchenette with a bathroom off to the left. It has to pass as a place that a guy right out of college and working as an assistant could afford. 

They stand awkwardly facing each other just inside the door. Loki realizes somewhere in his mind that this would be a good time to do damage control for last night. But his head is still pounding, filled with images of what will happen to him if he fails. He realizes through his haze that Thor is speaking again. Then he grasps the back of Loki’s neck and-- 

Loki is suddenly in a different room, one more familiar to him than ‘Luke’s’ apartment. There’s classical music playing. He can’t breathe. The hands on his neck keep tightening. There’s shouting. A face hovers inches from his own. It’s wide and scarred, snarling.

The terrifying face fades and resolves into a worried one. Not scarred and horrible, but golden and pretty. There are hands shaking him. Loki grabs the person’s arms and spins them, pinning the person to the wall. He snarls into the man’s face, hands on the neck in front him. Then he recognizes the face. Thor. He’s strangling Thor. He lets go as if burned. 

*******

Luke’s apartment is small, but it’s tidy and sophisticated, just like the man who lives there. Luke hasn’t said anything since inviting him inside. He can’t even seem to look at Thor. He must really be mad. 

Mustering courage, Thor tries again. Slower this time. “Luke, you have my sincerest apologies. My actions last night broke your trust. I have no excuse. I can only promise you that it will not happen again.” Luke still isn’t quite looking at him. Thor has to do better. He steps forward and grasps the back of Luke’s neck. “My friend, I promise you--” 

He cuts off when, at Thor’s touch, Luke’s eyes blow wide and he stops breathing. He almost sounds like he’s choking. Thor panics. “Luke? Luke!” The man’s eyes stare straight through him, as though seeing something else. He’s still not breathing. Thor grabs the man by his upper arms and shakes him. “Luke? Hey! Snap out of it!”

Then Luke’s eyes clear and he finally gasps a large breath. Thor sucks in his own relieved gulp of air. “Luke, you--”

But then Luke grabs Thor with surprising speed and strength, spinning them and shoving Thor’s back into the wall. His hands go to Thor’s throat and start squeezing. He looks rabid. Thor makes a choking sound remarkably similar to the ones Luke had been making just seconds ago. 

Luke only squeezes Thor’s throat for a matter of seconds. Then he yanks his hands away, staring at Thor with wide, horrified eyes. Through desperately trying to replenish his lungs, Thor attempts to figure out what just happened. Did Luke just attack him? He definitely just attached him. Tried to strangle him, in fact. Thor has a thought to hit him. Or strangle him back. But then he rethinks. Why did Luke do that? Luke must be even more angry than he’d thought. The erratic behavior must be from Luke fighting to control his anger. It would be just like him to keep it bottled up, only for it to explode out all at once. 

Luke begins to stutter out an apology. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I--” 

“No, I’m sorry,” Thor cuts him off. He doesn’t want Luke to suppress his anger. He wants him to let it out so it stops torturing him. Thor suppresses his own pride and shakes his head. “I deserved that. It’s only fair after how I treated you last night. I completely disregarded your wishes and let my own feelings get the better of me. I am sorry. I truly did try to keep myself from developing feelings for you. But I could not resist your sharp tongue. And last night, seeing you so happy and relaxed, I just… I forgot myself. I let myself think that we could be... But I promise you, I will do better. I want to be your friend and I can ignore this, so please, I--”

Luke kisses him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who is following this! Comments and kudos give me life <3


	7. Compulsion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *wiping nervous sweat from brow* I hope you enjoy this one! It's a first for me, so please be gentle...
> 
> See end of chapter for warnings
> 
> Comments and Kudos always appreciated :)

If Loki hadn’t already ruined everything before, he certainly has now. He just tried to strangle Thor. He just tried to strangle the man who he is supposed to make fall in love with him. Admittedly, he hadn’t known it was Thor at the time. But that’s hardly something he can explain while he’s still Luke. Luke is a well-adjusted college grad, not a barely sane con artist with a tendency to break from reality. 

Already knowing it’s pointless, he attempts to fix things. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I--” 

Thor cuts him off with his own apology. “No, I’m sorry.” Okay, now Loki knows there must be something wrong with the man. He’s still apologizing? After Loki just tried to strangle him? 

Thor goes on. “I deserved that. It’s only fair after how I treated you last night. I completely disregarded your wishes and let my own feelings get the better of me. I am sorry, I truly did try to keep myself from developing feelings for you.” 

Wait, Thor has feelings for him? Beyond lust?  
“But I could not resist your sharp tongue. And last night, seeing you so happy and relaxed, I just… I forgot myself.” 

And those feelings are based off of--?   
“I let myself think that we could be... But I promise you, I will do better. I want to be your friend and I can ignore this, so please, I--”

Loki is kissing him before he can make the decision to do so. It only takes Thor a second to catch up and start kissing back. Loki pushes him back against the wall and proceeds to plunder every corner of Thor’s mouth. He’s enveloped in the same smell of spring, but now there’s a current of ozone running through it, the smell of a storm rolling in. 

Loki hooks one long leg over Thor’s hip until the larger man gets the idea. He gathers Loki up in his comically huge arms and lifts, allowing Loki to wrap both legs around Thor’s broad waist. Loki grinds down on him, enjoying the display of strength. There aren’t many people who can so easily lift a man as tall as Loki. Clamping his legs tighter around the large man, he leans back and lets Thor’s hands on his ass take his full weight as Loki shucks his own shirt over his head. Thor growls and walks them over to the bed. He lets Loki fall back onto it and strips Loki’s trousers and boxers in one movement. He follows quickly after to drape himself over the thinner man. Together, they wrestle Thor out of his clothes as well. Loki revels in the feeling of being completely enveloped and covered by the large expanse of Thor’s body, their cocks rubbing together. But that isn’t what he needs right now.

Loki uses Thor’s own weight as momentum to flip them over, reversing their positions. He reaches over to the bedside table and retrieves a condom and lube, reveling in the way Thor’s eyes darken even further. Loki flicks the lube open, dribbling a copious amount onto his right hand, soaking his fingers. With his left, he grabs Thor’s generous thigh and roughly pushes it up. Without further preamble, he pushes two lubed fingers into Thor at once. 

Thor cries out, surprised and probably in a bit of pain, but he bucks down onto Loki’s fingers inside of him, spearing himself even further. Loki proceeds to prep him fast and rough, quickly working his way up to four fingers. Thor is panting and flushed, already looking absolutely wrecked. Loki removes his fingers, earning a small whine from Thor. 

Loki smirks down at the man. “Don’t worry, Sweetheart. I’ll take care of you.” Thor gives a deep, rumbling moan at the words. Loki leans down to give him a filthy kiss, which Thor returns with enthusiasm, grabbing the brunette’s head with both hands and forcing his tongue inside Loki’s mouth. Then Loki’s got a hand on either of Thor’s thighs and shoves them nearly to his chest, delighted at the man’s surprising flexibility. He grins as best as he can around Thor’s tongue in his mouth, positions himself, and fucks in.

Thor’s shout breaks their kiss. He throws his head back, eyes screwed shut, mouth open and panting. He looks stunning. Loki lets his own mouth hang open on a pant as he admires the view laid out beneath him. Thor’s golden hair is spread out on the pillow like a halo, face tensed with pleasure-pain and sweat glistening on his brow. His strong pecs and biceps flex under a voluptuous cushioning of flesh that makes Loki want to squeeze and lick. 

He gives Thor a moment before pulling out and pushing back in more slowly, getting more of his length into Thor’s obscenely tight heat this time. By the fifth slow thrust, his cock is fully sheathed inside Thor. Loki moans loudly at the way the muscles of Thor’s ass flutter around him. 

Thor’s hands, which had remained buried in the black hair while Loki worked his way inside, now move to wrap around the thinner man. As Loki gives him time to adjust to the penetration, he feels Thor map out Loki’s bones and muscles. He drags his hands over and between Loki’s shoulder blades, caresses over his sides, and runs both hands down his back, fingers tracing each notch of his vertebrae. When the hands grab his ass, Loki’s hips give an involuntary thrust. They both moan at the resulting sensations. 

Loki begins a gentle pace, rocking into Thor with slow, even movements. Thor wraps his legs around Loki’s waist and his arms hook under Loki’s shoulders to grab at the black hair again. As Thor’s body opens to him, Loki picks up the pace. Thor cranes his head up to capture Loki’s lips once more. As their tongues meet in an uncoordinated tangle, Loki pushes Thor’s legs up even further and begins pounding into him mercilessly. Thor moves his hands to brace against the headboard as Loki’s hips drive him further up the bed. 

Thor’s neglected cock is leaking and bouncing against his stomach. Loki switches his angle a few times until Thor’s moans turn into sharp cries, cock twitching and leaking even more. The man almost looks like he could cum just like this. But Loki finally finds his mercy and brings a hand to Thor’s weeping length. It doesn’t take long before Thor is crying out and spurting over Loki’s hand. Loki switches to a deeper angle and moves to brace his elbows on either side of Thor’s head. Thor’s hands come up to frame his face and drag it down to his own. Loki loses his rhythm as Thor claims his mouth in a reverent kiss. And then his vision is whiting out as he spills inside Thor. 

They pant into each other’s mouths for several beats before Loki pulls out and rolls off. He discards the condom and looks up at the ceiling. His mind is blissfully quiet. At last.

Until it’s not.

Without the lust clouding his mind, he’s able to see exactly how badly he’s just fucked up. Again. Had Loki stuck to his plan, we never would have slept with Thor before he had assurances from the man that he wanted no others. Not only that, but Loki has broken away from Luke’s submissive personality. Thor’s file had explicitly informed him that the man likes submissive partners. He is Mister Toppy Alpha. He does not like dominant partners and he does not bottom. 

“Stop.” Thor’s voice interrupts Loki’s whirlwind of thoughts. He turns his head to look at the blonde. Thor is lying on his side and watching Loki with a fond gaze. “I can hear you over thinking. Stop.” He slings an arm around Loki’s waist and pulls him until his head is nestled under Thor’s chin. It feels marvelous. 

So Loki stops. 

*******

Luke is kissing him. He tried to strangle him and now he’s kissing him. Thor has major whiplash, but he’s certainly not complaining now. 

Luke is utterly beautiful. And Thor finally lets himself look. As clothes come off and more expanses of Luke are revealed to him, Thor really takes the time to admire the form beneath him. Luke is long, lean, looks strong like a dancer. And apparently he doesn’t just look strong, as he exhibits when he flips Thor’s considerable weight beneath him with ease. Thor is caught up in admiring the man and, before he knows it, Luke is shoving two fingers into his ass. He thinks he should tell Luke at some point that he doesn’t bottom. 

He forgets to mention it. 

After surfacing from his own intense orgasm, Thor watches Luke fall apart above and inside of him. It’s one of the most intimate moments he has ever experienced. 

Luke rolls off and, as they lay there panting, Thor reflects on what just happened. He had gone from thinking he had completely fucked things up with Luke to having the man’s cock up his ass in mere minutes. 

Thor has only bottomed a few times before and has never enjoyed it. But he’s never found someone who could match him for dominance, physical strength, and confidence quite the way Luke can. Being fucked by Luke was some of the best sex of his life. 

Thor rolls to look at the man lying next to him. He can tell from the blank eyes and the furrow on his brow that Luke is getting lost in his own head again. “Stop.” Luke turns to look at him. Thor tries to communicate his own state of peace with his eyes. “I can hear you over thinking. Stop.” 

Luke's forehead smooths out and he suddenly looks very young. Thor reaches for him without having to think about it. 

As Luke settles under his chin, Thor wonders if maybe that compulsion he feels to obey goes both ways. Because Luke relaxes and is soon fast asleep.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains sexual content


	8. Acceptance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to everyone who is following, commenting, and leaving kudos! I started writing this thinking it would just be for me but I'm so glad that other people are enjoying it too <3

Thor wakes up feeling pleasantly cool. He runs hot, so he’s usually burning up first thing in the morning. It’s a nice change. 

He looks down at the dark head tucked against his chest. He feels an odd swelling inside his chest that’s difficult to identify. Normally he feels a need to plan a polite escape the morning after hooking up with someone. But now he feels… peaceful. That too is a nice change. 

He brings both arms up to encircle Luke, pressing the length of their nude bodies together. He knows Luke is awake when he tenses at the contact. Thor feels a spark of dread. Did he read this wrong? He strokes the black hair in a desperate plea for Luke to not freak out.

“Morning,” Thor whispers, some instinct telling him to keep his voice low.

For a moment he thinks Luke won’t respond. Then he lifts his head and looks up at Thor with wide eyes. “You’re still here.”

Thor shifts nervously. He can’t tell whether Luke is relieved or disappointed. “Yeah. Is that okay?”

Luke throws the blankets off and slings a leg over Thor, straddling him. The ravenous kiss is answer enough. 

Thor moans and grabs Luke’s ass with both hands, rolling their hips together. In the morning light, Luke looks more delicate, almost bird like. But Thor doesn’t fear breaking him. He knows the deceptive strength that lies beneath the soft skin. He rolls to pin the thin man beneath him, grinding him down into the bed. 

Luke shoves lube and a condom into Thor’s hand. He immediately obeys the silent command, coating his fingers with a generous slick and hiking Luke’s leg up onto his shoulder. He circles the tight entrance slowly, exploring and caressing more than prepping. His other hand maps out the lines of Luke’s chest while his mouth travels along his jaw and clavicle. He skips the temptingly long throat, remembering Luke’s aversive response to it the night before. 

When he finally enters Luke it’s slow and gentle, the perfect contrast to the previous night’s roughness. Thor slips his fingers through Luke’s as his hips rock forward, joining them. Luke’s neverending legs wrap around Thor in a serpentine embrace that seems to threaten constriction should he attempt to pull too far away. It’s a good thing Thor has no intention of leaving Luke’s body until he absolutely has to. 

*******

It quickly becomes apparent to Loki that he hasn’t scared Thor away at all. On the contrary, Thor has done a complete 180 from resolutely being Loki’s friend that constantly needles him to being a soppy romantic. Loki finds it… endearing. But he’s finally made headway and it has been made very clear to him that he cannot afford any more distractions. Nebula and Gamora certainly doing hesitate in reminding him often enough. 

So, as it becomes a regular thing for Thor and Loki to stay over at each other’s places, he starts searching Thor’s computer instead of attempting to find opportunities to access Odin’s. Thor’s home computer is a far easier target, as he keeps it open and unlocked on his desk most of the time. This gives Loki a plethora of opportunities whenever Thor is sleeping, showering, cooking, or for any other reason leaving Loki alone in his bedroom. 

The first thing Loki looks for on Thor’s computer is a definitive location for the Tesseract. Unsurprisingly, he doesn’t find it. Next he looks for the code to open the door to the lower level of Asgard where the safe is located. He quickly finds it in the trusting Oaf’s “notes to self,” right on his desktop. 

He gives the code to Gamora to have her test it and confirm it’s the correct one. It is. 

They can’t go into the basement yet, though. When Gamora tested the door code, she only barely inched the door open, just to shut it immediately when she heard voices. Loki learns from a floor plan that he finds on Thor’s computer that there are several people who work on the lower level, among them Heimdall. And there’s no chance of sneaking in after hours. The security in Asgard is too tight to be worth the risk. Besides, it would be a wasted trip without knowing the code to the safe. 

However, now that Loki’s relationship with Thor is progressing, he’s confident that he can get Thor to marry him before he’s made CEO. Hopefully then Loki will be made a board member and be allowed information that will get him access to the safe. 

*******

Thor has been dating Luke for almost two months. For the first time in his life, he understands what it means to be in love. Since they first got together, Thor has pushed Luke to express his true personality more and more. And with every new bit of Luke that he sees, he falls more in love. 

Thor has talked to Luke about the front he puts up. Luke had seemed quite distressed when Thor first brought it up. Eventually, though, they’d ended up having a really good conversation. Thor had been able to express his desire to know every single part of Luke, even the so-called ugly stuff. Luke, in turn, had expressed to Thor that he’s spent so much time trying to be what other people want that he’s never really taken the time to get to know himself. Thor had promised him that they would get to know the real Luke together. 

Any more, Luke almost always seems to be relaxed and genuine. Even when he’s biting Thor’s head off or calling him Oaf, Thor knows it’s a privilege that Luke doesn’t hide his ire from him anymore. Besides, he’s pretty sure Luke uses Oaf more as a pet name than an actual insult these days. 

Despite how well things are going, Thor can’t help being nervous now that they’ve been together for a little while. He has never lacked for willing bed partners, but relationships were never really his thing. The longest of them was with Jane and they had barely made it past three months. Thor is resolved to keep Luke, though. His other relationships had largely fallen apart due to Thor’s own ambivalence toward his partners. He already knows that won’t be an issue this time, though. He’s never been so smitten. He would never forgive himself if he lost Luke. 

*******

Loki has never experienced someone loving him for who he actually is, thorns and all. Usually, he constructs a meticulous persona, custom made for each job, that is perfectly crafted to make the mark fall in love with him. But that didn’t work for Thor. He didn’t succeed in hooking Thor until he’d started acting more like himself. 

Since then, Loki has slowly come to the realization that much of what Thor likes about him are the parts that are Loki, rather than Luke. This is quite useful, seeing as it means Loki spends a lot less effort pretending to be someone else. It also feels undeniably good for someone to like Loki for who he actually is for once, rather than whoever he’s pretending to be at the time. And he’s never had friends before, but Thor’s friends have almost started to feel like his own. They too seem to like the real Loki.

Of course, he hasn’t completely given up the act. He still pretends to like Thor’s scotch, keeps up his British accent, plays up his ambition to have a career at Asgard, and reins in the part of himself that’s a little too close to the edge of sane. 

But his relationship with Thor is getting dangerous, nonetheless. Too often he forgets himself with Thor, letting slip truths that should really not be shared. Like the time that he’d told Thor about his identify issues. He’d been telling the truth when he told Thor that he doesn’t really know himself very well. Oh, he knows he’s a sarcastic, smart ass little shit. But beyond that? He’s spent far too many years pretending to be other people.

Three months into their relationship, Loki moves in with Thor. On their third night living together, he has Thor splayed out beneath him on their bed while Loki rides him. He’s bouncing at a frantic pace with Thor’s cock aimed perfectly at his prostate. God, he’s so close and neither of them has even touched his weeping cock yet. Thor’s hands are roaming over Loki’s thighs and hips. They start to trail up his troso. Lost in sensation, Loki speaks without thinking. “Yes, fuck, grab my tits!”

Thor pauses for a split second, long enough for Loki to realize what he’s said and panic. He scrambles off of Thor, landing on his ass on the other side of the bed. He blushes furiously and keeps his eyes on his fidgeting hands while he attempts to stutter out an explanation. He doesn’t get very far before Thor’s fingers lift his chin to make Loki look him in the eye. 

Thor’s eyes bore into him for a long moment. He seems to be looking for something. Then he’s pressing Loki to lay back on the sheets. He goes willingly and watches Thor kneel between his legs. Then Thor leans down slowly, keeping his eyes on Loki’s face, and sucks a nipple into his mouth. It’s by no means the first time Thor’s done this to him. But this time is different. As he sucks and licks, he brings his hands up to cup Loki’s pecs, rubbing and squeezing as if they’re a pair of breasts. Loki moans, struggling to keep his eyes open to watch the sinful display. 

Thor continues to fondle his chest as he raises his mouth up to Loki’s and kisses him deeply. He pulls back and says, “I love your lips.” Kisses his adam’s apple, gently. “I love your neck.” He kisses along the length of Loki’s sternum to place a wet kiss on his nipple. “I love your tits.”

Loki’s eyes go wide and then nearly shut as he moans at the words.

Thor continues kissing on down. “I love your stomach.” Kiss. “I love your hips.” Kiss, kiss. “I love your cock.” He gives the head a sucking kiss that has Loki bucking. Then his mouth is on Loki’s entrance, giving another wet kiss as he pushes one finger inside to press against his prostate. “I love your cunt.”

Loki cums so hard he sees lighting.

They talk about it later. Thor provides him with the term ‘genderqueer’. Loki thinks on it for a while. He decides it fits, more or less. When Thor asks, he tells him, truthfully, that he doesn’t much care what pronouns he uses. He doesn’t quite feel dysmorphic. It isn’t’ even that he doesn’t feel like a man. He just kind of feels like a woman sometimes, too. He decides not to worry too much about exact terms and definitions. He’s okay with being called a man and he/him, so long as that doesn’t restrict him to never wearing dresses or getting his tits sucked. He’s just happy to have a way to describe how he feels. It’s even nicer to have someone who understands, or at least cares enough to try. 

*******

It’s a beautiful, sunny afternoon and Thor and Luke are out for a walk. They meander through the park holding hands. Or, more accurately, Luke drags Thor by the hand through the park in zigzagging patterns, dictated by Luke’s attention span. Every time he gets bored of the view in front of them or irritated by the angle at which the sun is hitting his skin or offended by the way a frog looks at him, Luke switches their direction. Thor is dizzy, but intensely amused. 

Luke changes their direction again, citing the foul smell of the stream they’d been following for the last couple of minutes. They walk back through the trees and out onto a paved path. Thor looks at Luke, waiting for him to choose in which direction to follow it. 

He doesn’t. Instead, he says, “Isn’t that your mother?”

Thor turns to look where he’s pointing. Surely enough, there is Frigga strolling down the path. Delighted, he goes to call out to her. But then he remembers that Luke had asked to keep their relationship secret from anyone involved in the company for now. Luke is still worried about what knowledge of their relationship would do to his job. Frigga isn’t involved with the company anymore since she retired to start a plant nursery, but she is still married to the CEO. Instead of calling out, he looks back to his boyfriend. 

Before he can ask Luke what he wants to do, Frigga calls out. “Thor!” 

Luke drops Thor’s hand and quickly puts some space between them.

Thor gives Luke a quick apologetic look before turning to greet her. “Mother, how unexpected.” He smiles and gives her a hug when she reaches them. 

When they break apart, she steps back and then looks over to Luke, blinks. “Aren’t you Odin’s assistant?”

“Ah, yes. Thor and I just ran into each other mere moments before you came along.”

Thor smiles brightly at Luke. His boyfriend is so smart and fast-thinking. “Yes! I was just out for a walk and ran into Luke here--”

“Oh, Thor, do stop,” Frigga says with a tinkling laugh. “You just gave him a look as though he were the sun itself. You did not just run into each other.” 

Thor grimaces and glances at Luke, hoping his boyfriend won’t be angry at his transparency. To his surprise, Luke is giving him a very similar look to the one Frigga just described. Thor returns it. 

The three of them continue their walk together. They explain to Frigga that they’ve been dating for the last three months, but don’t want to tell people at work yet. Frigga promises to keep their secret so long as Thor deigns to start sharing Luke’s time with her. 

It becomes a regular thing for the three of them to get together for lunch or strolls in the park. Luke and Frigga also go shopping together often. Luke comes home from each shopping trip with new things, like sundresses, mascara, and Thor's personal favorite, lingerie. It’s clear that Luke has told Frigga about his newly discovered non-binary identity and that Frigga is in full support. In fact, Thor is is pretty sure that his mother loves Luke almost as much as he does. 

*******

Loki adores Frigga. Since she learned of he and Thor’s relationship, she has treated Loki as if her were her own child. It is the most parental attention he has ever received. 

During one of their lunches with Thor, Frigga invites Loki to go shopping, just the two of them. He jumps at the opportunity to get some time with Frigga all to himself. They go to a large outdoor walking mall filled with art stores and boutiques. They wander for hours, trying on funny hats, critiquing art, and spritzing each other with perfumes. 

They are standing in an art gallery, looking at a large oil painting full of odd shapes that twist and writhe around each other in an unidentifiable heap. Loki smirks and says, “I think it’s a camel eating socks. A metaphor for our consumerist society, hoarding our possessions inside our humps.”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous,”Frigga scoffs through her own smirk. “I think it’s a tree with a bunch of little people jumping off its branches. It’s a metaphor for humans abandoning nature.”

Loki’s lip quirks further up his face. “It’s a bridge with a troll underneath and fish jumping out of the water to avoid it. Metaphor for capitalism.”

Frigga snorts. “It’s a bunch of cats dancing in a circle around a fire, which is spitting rocks at them. Metaphor for religion.” 

They get kicked out of the gallery for laughing too loudly. 

They walk into a fancy boutique. Frigga browses their scarves while Loki steps further into the store. He stops by the lipsticks. He gazes at them for a long moment before shaking himself and moving to continue on towards the men’s section. 

Frigga catches his arm. She gently pulls him back to the lipsticks. She peruses them while he waits awkwardly to the side. Does she want help choosing one for herself? Frigga selects a dark red called ‘Bathory’. Loki finds the cheeky reference to Elizabeth Bathory highly entertaining. 

Then Frigga surprises him. “Step over to the mirror.” He gives her a confused look. “Oh, come on. This color is perfect for you.” 

He blushes nearly as red as the lipstick, but does as she says. She expertly applies it for him and he looks at himself in the mirror. He smiles, genuine and happy. 

Frigga smiles back.

  
  



	9. Inguz

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who has left kudos and beautiful comments! You have no idea how much it makes me smile.

On the morning of their four month anniversary, Thor wakes before either Luke or the sun. He lays admiring the face on the pillow next to his for a long time. His love looks as though he’s frozen in some arctic night. His lips and skin are so devoid of pigment so as to look carved from ice. His eyelids are nearly purple against his frost white skin, looking somehow both sickly and ethereally beautiful. 

When the sun begins peeking through the blinds, casting stripes over Luke’s pale and perfect skin, Thor leans over his boyfriend and brushes a feather-soft kiss on his cheek, his chin, his nose, his eyelids, his freckles. He keeps going until Luke slowly begins to wake. It begins with his nose twitching. Then his whole face twitches. Then his hand comes up to bat half-heartedly at Thor’s face. Then, when Thor kisses the corner of his mouth, Luke’s teeth follow and snatch Thor’s lower lip in a vice grip. 

Luke’s eyes are open half mast, narrowed both threateningly and sleepily, staring through Thor. He doesn’t release Thor’s lip. He just lays there, with Thor trapped at his mercy. Thor’s heart beats fast. He’s not entirely sure whether it’s from arousal or the slight touch of fear that always comes when Luke gets like this. Likely both. 

Finally, Luke’s eyes fully focus and he seems a little more present. Thor immediately surges forward, turning Luke’s bite into a deep kiss. Luke moans into it and rolls his hips up against Thor. 

They both gasp as their hardening cocks rub together. Thor readjusts so that he’s straddling Luke, his thick thighs bracketing the slim hips, their cocks perfectly aligned. They grind together with long, slow thrusts as they see how far they can get their tongues into each others’ mouths. 

Luke’s hand blindly finds the lube on the bedside table. He slicks a finger and curls his hand under Thor’s left buttock to reach his entrance. The slicked digit slides in easily after last night. When Luke finds his prostate, Thor’s hips do a double snap into Luke’s. 

Then Thor is grabbing the lube. He reaches his hand down between them, trapping it between their rolling hips, and presses a slicked finger inside Luke. They moan into each others mouths as they massage each other’s prostates and their cocks roll together in a slow, intense rhythm.

Luke comes with another bite to the abused lip, bringing Thor over the edge with him.

When they’ve caught their breath, Luke asks, “So, what earned me such an early wake up call on a Saturday? 

Thor has a thought to be hurt that Luke forgot the anniversary, but instead decides to see it as an opportunity to surprise his boyfriend. “Oh, no reason. But now that we’re up, we might as well get ready for the day.” He jumps out of bed and trots over to the bathroom to start the shower. He stops to lean over and pick up some of their clothes on his way, hoping the view of his ass will convince Luke to follow him. 

*******

Loki watches as Thor leans down, displaying his ass. He knows exactly what the larger man is trying to do. It won’t work. He’s still annoyed at being woken so unceremoniously, despite the following orgasm. On second thought, the orgasm was quite good. And that view of Thor’s ass is also quite pleasing. And now it’s quickly disappearing into the bathroom. He’d better follow it before it’s completely out of sight. 

  
Half an hour later, they’re drinking coffee on the balcony, letting their wet hair dry in the breeze. Loki is reciting a poem to Thor. Not a real one, he’s just making it up on the spot.

“The old man knows his oranges are ripe

When they fall and hit his head.

The young girl finds a bloody fruit

And knows her father is dead.

Another orange falls upon the scene

And the girl is not home for bed.

The old woman finds quite a gruesome scene

And thinks, ‘my, what a marvelous red’.”

Loki continues on for quite a few verses and Thor laughs with his head thrown back, pinching his nose to keep coffee from coming back up. Loki admires the strong, elegant curve of the man’s throat, follows Thor’s adams apple with his eyes as it dances to his laughter. 

He thinks he will miss this.

He knows he’s getting close to the end of this job. The ceremony that will see Thor taking control of Asgard is just one and a half months away. He’d gone out to the bar with Thor and his friends a few nights ago and Nebula had pulled him aside to remind him just how short on time he was to marry Thor and get access to the Tesseract. 

He’s started subtly prodding Thor in the right direction. He needs Thor to come to the conclusion that they should get married on his own. If Loki proposes, it could be seen by Odin as a grasp for power, which would hurt Loki's chances at being put on the board. 

However, it’s more difficult than it should be to manipulate Thor. Not because the man is too stupid to get it. Nor because he’s smart enough, or at least untrusting enough, to figure out that he’s being manipulated. No, it’s difficult because Loki simply does not want to manipulate him. 

Loki has had many marks over the past years. Some of them he hated and some of them he grew to care for. No matter what, he has never had trouble doing his job. He is Loki, nicknamed the God of Lies, Master of Mischief, Trickster. He and the Black Widow are the best the Order has ever had, their success records near perfect. So no, Loki has never had trouble keeping up his act with a mark. He has never let himself be distracted by a mark. And he has never hesitated in manipulating a mark until they were twisted into a celtic knot around his bony finger. But, for some reason, Thor is different. 

They go back inside when their coffee runs out, their hair dried in curls from the wind. Thor sets to making breakfast and tells Loki to take a seat, which confuses him. In the month or so since he moved in with Thor, they’ve fallen into a smooth rhythm with each other, tag-teaming the cooking and other daily house care. They dance around each other in the kitchen, handing off items and weaving in and out of each other’s space effortlessly. 

But today Thor cooks alone. He makes them french toast covered in raspberries and peaches from Frigga’s garden along with eggs, bacon, and fried potatoes with peppers. It’s far more extravagant than their usual. Loki is only more confused. 

On top of all this, Thor has been grinning non-stop since he woke Loki at the crack of dawn. That in and of itself is not exactly unusual. The man certainly spends enough time with a grin on his face. But now it’s begun to take on a slightly manic quality. It reminds him of the time Thor spent all day getting more and more excited about going to the zoo after Loki had finally agreed to come with him. 

Loki is worried. What is he missing?

“Thor.” 

“Yes, love?”

“Want to tell me why you’re attempting to vibrate at the frequency of a hummingbird wing?”

Thor grins so wide that his eyes nearly squint shut with the pressure from his strained cheeks. “Wait here.” The large man runs back into their bedroom. Loki blinks. 

Then Thor is barrelling back, holding a shiny green gift bag with rainbow tissue paper exploding out of it. Loki blinks again. “What’s the occasion?”

“Just open it.”

Loki huffs and gives Thor an annoyed glare. “It’s not my birthday, which is the only time you’re meant to give someone a gift without receiving one in return. I didn’t even know there was an occasion I was meant to buy you something for. It hardly seems fair for you to spring this on me without giving me the chance at reciprocation.”

Thor’s eyes go a bit sad, but he’s still smiling fondly. “Just open it,” he repeats. 

Loki rolls his eyes and rips the garish tissue paper out of the bag. A card falls out along with it. He opens it and reads,

_ My beloved Luke, _

_ These four months with you have been the best ones of my life thus far. _

He stops reading there. It goes on for a whole page. It crumples a bit in his hand as he draws in a ragged breath. He’d been so focused on moving the plan forward that he had completely forgotten. 

Any time in the past, Loki would have found the idea of a four month anniversary absurd. It’s too arbitrary of a number to bother celebrating. Except that when they first started dating Thor had confided in Loki that he was bad at relationships, enough so that he had never been in one that lasted much more than three months. So hitting the four month mark is a big deal for him. 

And Loki forgot. 

He startles when Thor’s hand strokes his cheek, wiping away tears he hadn’t been aware were there. “It’s okay,” Thor says, “You’re here. It doesn’t matter that you forgot. Still having you here after four whole months, that’s what matters.”

Loki sobs. It isn’t even about the forgotten anniversary anymore. He’s in a pit of self loathing. Thor is the kindest, most loving person that’s ever come into his life. No one has ever made Loki feel so cared for, so appreciated. And Loki is plotting to betray him, to leave him. He sobs again, louder. 

Thor lets out a startled sound. Then he’s gathering Loki into his enormous arms, wrapping him up so tightly that Loki thinks there may actually be hope for him to remain in one piece. At least until he leaves. 

Loki snakes his arms around Thor’s neck, moves to straddle his lap, and holds back just as tightly. He’s probably cutting off some of the man’s air, but Thor doesn’t complain. Loki sobs in Thor’s embrace until his comfortable warmth overtakes the ice that runs in Loki’s veins. 

When Loki quiets, Thor pulls back enough to look him in the eye. “Really, love, it’s okay. More than anything, I just wanted to be able to give you something today to show you how important this is to me. How important you are.”

Loki very nearly chokes up again, but he instead reaches for the gift bag. He’s still sitting in Thor’s lap and brings the bag to rest between their chests. He reaches in and pulls out a wide, flat jewelry box. Inside it are two matching bracelets. They are both delicate herringbone chains, one gold and the other silver. They each have a small charm of Inguz, the Norse rune for new beginnings and true love.

Loki blanches. Did Thor figure out that Loki’s really from Norway, not Britain? But then he remembers that Thor’s family has Norwegian roots. That must be why he thought to use a rune. He breathes a sigh of relief and relaxes. He lifts one of the bracelets up into the light above their heads to admire it. They really are stunning. 

He looks down at Thor with his chin still lifted toward the bracelet held above his head and smirks. “I get the gold one.” 

Thor laughs, his eye-squinting smile making a return. 

*******

They still haven’t told Odin or anyone else at Asgard that they’re in a relationship. Luke has remained firm that he does not want to jeopardize his position working at Asgard. At first Thor had found it kind of fun sneaking around and being secretive. But it’s beginning to wear on him. Luke knows Thor loves him but Thor wants the world to know it too. 

They haven’t been together all that long, in the scheme of things, but Thor knows what he wants. He’s never felt this strongly for someone before.

He has thought long and hard about how he can be with Luke openly without ruining Luke’s career. Thor will be taking Odin’s place as CEO and owner of Asgard in just a few weeks. Once that happens, he will be the one giving people promotions. So, if they take their relationship public, any promotion he gives to Luke people will assume he got because of his relationship with Thor. 

However, back when Odin was named CEO, he was already married to Frigga. Since Asgard is first and foremost a family company, Odin’s wife had been given a place on the board without question. She served on the board until she decided to retire and start a plant nursery.

Therefore, once Thor is CEO of Asgard, no would would question it if his spouse was also made a member of the board. And that is certainly a promotion from where Luke is now.

His mother loves Luke. His friends love Luke. And, most importantly, Thor loves Luke more than anything. And so, he’s made a decision.

Thor is going to ask Luke to marry him.

  
  



	10. An Odd Feeling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *peeks out from behind chapter* Enjoy?

Thor plans the perfect proposal. First, he will surprise Luke by taking him to the Shakespearean play he’s been wanting to see. Afterwards, they’ll go to dinner at their favorite restaurant, the one where they had their first proper date. Just as they’re finishing their last glasses of champagne, the ring will arrive atop a pile of whipped cream adorning Luke’s favorite food: devil’s food cake. 

It’s perfect. 

But as Thor watches Luke laugh with Frigga at the dining table in his childhood home, he gets an odd feeling. It starts in his fingers. He flexes them to relieve it. Then it’s in his toes. He scuffs his boots against the floor. Then it’s in every part of him and he can no longer ignore it. 

“Luke.”

Odin, Frigga, and Luke all turn to look at Thor in surprise. He realizes too late, and without much caring, that’s he just interrupted a story. 

“Yes, darling?” Luke asks. Thor’s noticed he only uses such terms of endearment in front of Thor’s parents. 

“Would you step outside with me?”

Luke blinks several times, visibly attempting to contain his confusion. “Of course.” The odd feeling pulses.

They stand and Thor leads Luke out the back door with a hand on his back. The darkness of the evening sky and the overflowing life of Frigga’s garden enclose them as they step away from the house. 

Thor stops and Luke turns back to look at him. The uncertainty in his eyes only further solidifies in Thor’s mind what that odd feeling has been telling him. 

“Luke. Will you marry me?”

*******

They schedule their wedding to be just one week before Thor is to be named CEO and owner of Asgard. It just barely makes the timeline for Loki’s plan.

Thor has finally figured out that the only solution which allows him to keep Luke while also allowing Luke to progress in Asgard is to get married. Of course, it had taken quite a bit of Loki dropping less and less subtle hints to help Thor along to that conclusion. But finally they are here. 

As soon as they are engaged, Thor and Loki tell Odin about their relationship. He takes the whole thing remarkably well. They also agree that Loki should resign from his position as Odin’s assistant so that his ascension to being a board member will look less like a promotion due to Thor’s favor and more like Loki rejoining Asgard as a member of the family after becoming Thor’s spouse. This is a relief to Loki. He has been feeling a need to get out from under Heimdall’s watchful eye for a while now. The man is far too observant and seems far too suspicious of Loki.

In the months that he’s been dating Thor, Loki has learned a lot about the man. While the information in the file that Ronan had initially provided him with had not been wrong, per say, there is a lot more to Thor than that. For starters, Thor is just about the biggest romantic sap there ever was. He claims to have never been in love before, which would explain why there was no mention of this in his file. It’s a new development. Loki seems to have triggered a lot of new developments in Thor. Their friends and Thor’s mother have all told Loki on several occasions how much they believe he’s changed Thor for the better. 

Thor has changed Loki too. He’s helped him accept and put a name to his struggle to fit into a single gender. He’s given Loki friends for the first time in his life, or at least shown him what it would be like if he did. He’s given him a mother figure who’s already shown him more care than any parent he’s ever had. And he’s made Loki understand how it feels to be loved for qualities that aren’t just a farce. 

In short, Loki needs this job to end. He’s allowed himself to get far to invested. He needs to distance himself and get his head in the game. Because the end is fast approaching and, when it comes, Loki has to be prepared break Thor’s heart.

*******

They are married in a small ceremony with Thor’s family and friends along with Ronan and Corvus posing as Luke’s best friends from college. Loki had already told Thor earlier in their relationship that Luke’s parents had passed away several years back, to explain away their absence. Luckily, Thor doesn’t seem to see anything wrong with a small gathering. Loki doesn’t miss Heimdall’s suspicious look when he sees the emptiness of Luke’s side of the aisle, though. 

The ceremony itself is beautiful. They marry in Frigga’s garden, where Thor proposed. It’s simple and all the more perfect for it. Most of Loki’s weddings have been awful, gaudy displays. It feels right that this one is more intimate. 

Thor looks magnificent, dressed all in white. Loki had their suits specially made, matching pearlescent waistcoats and ties, Thor’s coat short and fitted, Loki’s long and flowing. He privately thinks that together they look like a pair of carved statues. 

And when Thor and Loki dance, he even manages to forget that it isn’t real for a few moments. 

*******

Once they’re married, Asgard’s board members decide to go ahead and let Loki join the board, since Thor will be CEO in just one week. All according to plan. In his first week as part of the board, Loki is filled in on quite a few of Asgard’s secrets. The location of the Tesseract is not one of them. Nor is the code to the safe. The code to get into the lower level isn’t one either, but that’s fine. He found that already.

One thing he does learn is that each board member is assigned a different security code that allows them to access secure files. Loki is given a security code as well. Later that same day, when Odin is in a meeting, Loki sneaks into his office to search his computer again. He finds a list of numbers, one of which matches Loki’s own security code. The list contains the same number of codes as there are board members. He figures it’s a safe bet that these are the security codes for every board member. 

That night he examines them and finds a pattern. The codes fit into a sequence.

It makes sense. Only Odin knows all of the board members’ security codes. And the fact that they all fit into such a neat little pattern secures Loki’s confidence that, together and in sequence, they make up the code to the safe. 

*******

One week after they’re married finds them preparing for Thor’s “coronation,” as Luke has taken to calling it. Thor has never been happier. He has the most amazing man as his husband and is about to inherit his birthright. 

He’s attempting to fasten his tie when he sees Luke’s reflection walk up behind his own in the mirror. “You are hopeless. Here, let me tie it for you.”

Thor gladly lets himself be spun and gazes adoringly at his scowling husband as he fixes the mess Thor’s made of his tie. Luke is wearing a black three piece suit that shimmers green when the light hits it. His emerald eyes are emphasized by mascara and a hint of smokey green eyeshadow at the outer corners of his lids. He’s standing taller than Thor in his three inch pump heels. His hair is just getting long enough to start licking over his shoulders. He looks utterly beautiful and Thor can’t believe how lucky he is. 

When Luke finishes fixing the tie and steps back, Thor asks him, “How do I look?”

Luke examines Thor’s black suit, red shirt, and silver tie with exaggerated consideration. Then he smirks and says, “Like a king.”

Thor grins. “I suppose that makes you queen.” Luke just hums in response, but Thor can see a smile in the creases at the corners of his eyes. 

Thor grasps the back of Luke’s neck. He’s noticed over the last few months that the man has a strange sensitivity about his throat. The first few times Thor had tried this same gesture back when they first started dating, Luke had tensed up. He’d seemed to stare straight through Thor to someone else, his eyes glassy and terrified. Thor had also made the connection that this must have been the reason Luke had freaked out and stopped breathing that time Thor had touched his neck shortly before they first slept together. Over the last few months, though, Luke has warmed up to it and begun leaning into the touch. It’s become somewhat of a gesture of endearment between them.

On cue, Luke leans into Thor’s hand on his neck, his face splitting into a smile. 

Thor asks him, “Are you excited?”

“Of course. I’ve looked forward to this day as much as you have. You’re my husband and my friend. I couldn’t be more proud.” He looks into Thor’s eyes for a long moment. “Never doubt that I love you.”

Thor’s eyes crinkle in a silent laugh. What makes Luke think he would he ever doubt it? They’re soulmates, of course they love each other. He leans in to give Luke a fierce kiss in answer. When he pulls back, Luke almost looks sad. Concerned, Thor assures him, “Worry not, my love. I could never doubt it.” 

Luke smiles faintly. “I know.” Then he pulls away. “Come, your throne of paperwork awaits.”

*******

Loki gives Thor one last kiss before the larger man goes up to the front of the room to stand by his father. He looks regal. Truly a king. Loki uses his phone to snap a picture of the gorgeous blonde. Thor, despite being in front of all of Asgard, makes a ridiculous face for the photograph. And if Loki’s responding laugh is a little hysterical, who can blame him? 

A slap to his back jolts Loki forward. The following rumble of a laugh confirms the asultant’s identity. 

“Volstagg. A pleasure, as always.”

“Luke! You got taller.” 

Loki lifts an eyebrow, meeting Volstagg’s gaze. With the assistance of his pump heels, it isn’t difficult. “Or perhaps you’ve grown shorter.” 

As the portly man rumbles another laugh, another of their friends joins them. He leans around Volstagg to greet Loki. “Luke, dear. You look ravishing.” 

“Fandral, darling. You flatter me so. Surely I pale in comparison to your own radiance.” 

“But my radiance can only be a reflection of your own, for I am but a wave, pushed and pulled by the beauty of the moon.” He snatches up Loki’s hand and sweeps down to kiss it. 

Loki and Fandral have an ongoing play-flirtation battle to see who can outdo the other. Fandral generally wins. He always has some new Arthurian compliment that manages to reduce the room to giggles. It’s provided Loki with no end of amusement.

“Ugh, Fandral. He’s married.” The new arrival looks them over with disgust. 

“Sif.” Loki nods curtly.

“Luke.” Sif merely lifts her chin a hair. 

Loki and Sif have a running joke that they don’t get on. Everyone knows it’s a lie and no one but Sif and Loki get the joke. 

A small huff announces the arrival of Hogun. Loki gives the quiet man a deeper nod than he spared for Sif. Hogun gives a meaningful nod back. Sif rolls her eyes. 

“Really though, Luke,” Volstagg says sincerely. “You look lovely.”

Loki’s face tugs into a small grin. He’s only just begun showing more of his feminine side in public and it feels good to have their friends' approval. 

“You’re only saying that because it’s the first time you’re seeing anything but the top of his head,” Sif snarks with a lopsided smile. Loki can tell it’s her way of showing support for him. 

“And you’re just envious that I can walk in four inch heels,” Loki smirks.

“Girls, girls. You’re both pretty.” The uncharacteristically sassy quip comes from Hogun. They all burst out in surprised laughs, including Hogun. 

A fork tings against a champagne flute and they all turn to the front of the room. Odin’s speech is about to begin. Loki’s gaze inevitably slides to the younger man next to him. He finds Thor already looking back at him, smiling softly at the scene of Loki laughing with their friends. It breaks one of the last remaining intact pieces inside of Loki.

The pain threatens to overwhelm him and overflow his eyelids, so he resolutely shuts down his emotions and goes back over the plan in his head.

He’ll take the Tesseract today. Every person in Asgard will be gathered on the executive floor for the ceremony. And, therefore, away from their desks. This includes the people who work on the lower level, most importantly Heimdall. With the basement clear of all personnel, Loki will be able to sneak into the lower floor and try the code for the safe. 

If it works, he’ll have to leave today and never see Thor or the others again. If it doesn’t, he’ll have to get out of here even faster because an incorrect code being entered into the safe will almost certainly trigger an alarm. 

*******

Odin is giving his final speech as CEO and owner of Asgard. All of their employees are gathered into the largest conference room on the executive floor of the building. Thor is standing to Odin’s right in front of the room, awaiting his turn to speak. 

He lost sight of Luke a while ago. 

He’s sure his husband is just buried in one of the clusters of Asgard employees, but he’d hoped Luke would stay standing near the front when Thor was officially named CEO. He’d wanted to be able to look into his husband’s eyes while thanking all those who’ve supported him. 

Odin is nearing the end of his speech. “I have served as Asgard’s CEO for 30 years. I have done so to the very best of my abilities. I am proud of what I’ve accomplished in my time here. Now, it is time to pass on the mantle. Thor Odinson, my heir, has proved himself--” 

A loud alarm goes off, filling the room with a wailing siren. Thor’s never heard this alarm before. He looks at his father. Odin is ghost white when he whispers, “The Tesseract.”

*******

Loki stands in the crowd and gazes at Thor, not hearing a word of Odin beginning his undoubtedly long speech. The thought occurs to him that this is his last chance to make a different choice. To stay here with their friends. To stay with Thor. 

To live out the rest of his days as Luke Odinson, husband, friend, and son-in-law. To wake up every morning to cerulean eyes and go to sleep every night with golden curls twisted around his fingers. To have friends. To have a family. To have Thor. To have a life. 

But he can’t. If he fails in this job, he will not have a life at all, let alone one with Thor. 

So, with a final look to try and memorize the beautiful golden face, Loki is moving. He worms through the crowd, under the guise of getting to the refreshments table. He takes a cup from the intern serving punch and then slips out the door. 

Gamora is waiting outside with a glare twisting her features. “What took you so long?” she hisses.

He doesn’t bother answering. “Is it clear?” 

She gives him a searching look before, finally, “Yeah, it’s clear.” 

He removes his high heeled pumps, tossing them to the side of the hall. He’ll run faster without them. He’d been vain to wear them at all. Gamora follows as he runs down the stairs to the lower level. 

Just as Gamora had said, every floor is empty and clear. They get to the basement door and Loki keys in the code. He hears a low mechanic clang, indicating it’s unlocked. He pushes the door open just enough to allow sound through. They listen for a full minute before slowly pushing the door open. Just as they’d hoped, this floor is empty too. 

Gamora remains at the entrance to keep watch while Loki goes inside. This level is one large room, with several desks and lots of filing cabinets. There is just one door, on the far side of the room. It’s also locked. He tries his own board member security code. It clicks open. Inside, on the far side of the small room, there’s a large, metal door with an electronic keypad. The door to the walk-in safe. Loki walks over and, without delay or hesitation, keys in the sequence of board member security codes.

There’s a series of loud clicks and then the metal door unlocks. He grasps the large door and pulls it open. The inside of the safe is at least as big as the room guarding it. It’s full of countless priceless items. Loki only has eyes for one. 

The Tesseract.

*******

After the alarm goes off, Odin immediately starts yelling orders to his senior board members. At his word, they run out of the room toward the stairwell, Heimdall leading the charge.

“Father, what--?”

Odin finally turns to him. “The vault has been broken into. We need to get the building on lockdown before the culprits can escape. Keep everyone up here.” With that, Odin runs off after the other board members. 

Thor shakes his shock away and begins hollering instructions to the floor full of distressed Asgard employees. He goes around and locks all four of the doors that lead into the huge conference room to keep the assailants from getting to them. Only once everything is secure and everyone is contained does he allow himself to look for his husband. 

He can’t find him. 

He circles the room twice, asking everyone if they’ve seen Luke. At last, a young intern who had been handing out punch at the refreshments table tells Thor that he saw Luke go out into the hall during Odin’s speech. 

Thor panics. Luke wasn’t in the conference room when the alarm went off. And Thor just ensured he couldn’t get back in by locking all the doors. Luke is trapped outside with dangerous assailants. 

Thor yanks open the door by the refreshments table and runs out. He trips over something and looks down. It’s one of Luke’s shoes. The other one is sitting nearby. Thor’s mind whirls. What happened? Had Luke been trying to get back inside when an assailant had grabbed him and knocked his shoes off in the struggle? Or had he ditched them himself to better run from his attacker? Thor is starting to hyperventilate, but he forces his legs to move him onward down the hall to the stairwell. 

He has to find Luke.

  
  



	11. Good Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moment of truth, y'all.

Loki strides into the safe. The glowing blue cube is raised up on a pedestal. Cords stream out if it, connecting to numerous computers. Well, shit. He wasn't warned about that. How is supposed to disconnect each one without setting off a million alarms? He’ll be caught before he can get them all. He looks at each of the screens displaying data collected by the tesseract. The text moves so quickly over them that he can't catch any of it. 

Looking more closely at the Tesseract, he realizes the cords are connected to it in bunches that narrow into just three ports on the cube. He grips one bundle with his left hand and grips the other two with his right by curling his thumb and index around one and his other three fingers around the other. He takes a deep breath and pulls them out all at once. 

Immediately a deafening alarm blares through the basement, undoubtedly loud enough to be heard throughout the entire building. He snatches up the tesseract and runs. He doesn't bother closing the safe or the door of the room guarding it. He runs straight for the door leading to the stairwell. Gamora is already holding it open. He runs straight through, with her on his heels. 

They hit the main floor and run toward the rear exit. Gamora grabs Loki before he runs into the hall and pulls him behind an alcove. Heimdall runs into sight a second later. The man certainly has a gift for timing, he muses. This is the second time he’s caught him. Loki hands the Tesseract off to Gamora and steps out of the alcove. 

"Oh my God, Heimdall! What is happening?" He yells over the alarm. 

Heimdall stops and looks at him suspiciously. "Luke? What are you doing down here?" Three more board members run past them, towards the basement. Then Gamora slips out of her hiding place and slips behind Heimdall in the opposite direction. Loki keeps his eyes away from her and distracts the man in front of him.

"I forgot my phone in the downstairs bathroom and wanted to take a picture of Thor once he's officially crowned. I ran down to get it. But then that awful noise started--”

Clearly in a hurry and impatient with Loki’s rambling, Heimdall cuts him off. “Alright, just get back upstairs with the others. We will deal with this.” 

As Heimdall continues toward the lower level, Loki runs after Gamora toward the rear exit. Outside, Nebula waits with a car idling. Gamora and Loki leap into the backseat and she takes off. Loki looks out the back window, knowing he’ll never return here. 

Knowing he’ll never see Thor again.

*******

Thor searches every floor of Asgard for his missing husband. What he finds, instead, are Odin and the other board members crowded around the open safe. Tyr begins explaining the situation to Thor, something about one valuable thing or another being stolen. Apparently, while Thor had been organizing everyone upstairs, they had already searched the entirety of Asgard. The assailants are gone. 

Thor doesn’t have any room in his mind to care about that right now. “Did you find Luke when you were searching the floors?” he asks anxiously. 

Tyr frowns at the interruption, but Heimdall looks up. “Did he not come back upstairs?” 

“No, he’s not upstairs. Wait, you saw him? Where?”

“I ran into him when I came downstairs after the alarm. He said he left his phone in the bathroom and came down to get it.”

Thor frowns. “No, that can’t be right. He used his phone to take a picture of me just before Father started his speech.”

Heimdall’s face turns grim and he gives Thor a heavy look. “And now we cannot find him. Nor the thief.”

Thor’s panic spikes again. “Do you think they kidnapped him? What would they want with Luke?”

Heimdall and Odin look at each other. The other board members all have the same grim look. It almost looks like pity. 

Odin steps forward and puts a hand on Thor’s shoulder. “Thor,” he takes a sighing breath, “Luke had his phone, he lied about why he was downstairs. That was just after the safe was broken into. And now we can’t find him.”

Thor shakes his head, keeps shaking it. He stares at his father with horrified, confused eyes. “No, you can’t mean--”

“Heimdall caught him snooping in my office when I was out a while back. He lied then too. It only happened that once, so we brushed it off. But this gives it new meaning.”

Thor’s mind catches on something. “It was Heimdall. Both times Luke was ‘caught lying’ it was Heimdall who witnessed it.” He turns to glare accusingly at the man. “He’s setting Luke up!” 

At Thor’s accusation, Heimdall’s expression looks sad, of all things. 

Odin, though, looks furious. “Thor, use your head! You’ve been played. He was just using you to get to the Tesseract. You are responsible for facilitating a con man getting into Asgard. And instead of taking responsibility, you’re pointing fingers like a child!” Odin seems to be ignoring the fact that he was the one who hired Luke in the first place.

Thor rages. “He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me! There is no way he could have done this, not to me. You stand here accusing my husband while he is scared, kept by assailants that kidnapped him. We should be out hunting them down like the monsters they are!”

“You are a vain, greedy, cruel boy!” 

“And you’re an old man and a fool!”

Odin goes quieter. “Yes. I was a fool… to think you were ready.”

“Father--”

“No! Through your arrogance and stupidity you have allowed a great crime against Asgard to be committed. And now, rather than take responsibility for it, you accuse the best man you know of treachery. You are unworthy of Asgard. You are unworthy of your title. You are unworthy of the love which that criminal convinced you so thoroughly he bore for you.” He straightens his back, expression going cold. “You are henceforth no longer my heir as the future head of Asgard.”

*******

Thor storms out of Asgard, intent on finding Luke himself. Fuck Odin. Fuck Asgard. His husband needs him now. 

However, when he tries to put gas in his car, he discovers that none of his credit cards are working. He tries the ATM. It tells him that the balance of his collective accounts is $0. 

He convinces himself that the kidnappers must have somehow taken all of his money along with Luke and the Tesseract. When he gets home to find Luke’s wedding ring sitting on a note reading “watch the video file on your desktop”, he’s sure it will be the culprit demanding ransom. 

But it isn’t. It’s just Luke, speaking to Thor.

_ Thor. If you’re watching this then I suspect you’ve already figured out what has happened. There is no easy way to say it, but here it is. You will never see me again.” _

Thor’s breathing stops. It feels like Luke’s hands are around his throat once more. _ _

_ The sooner you accept it, the easier it will be for everyone. I’m sure you will ask yourself many questions in the coming days. You will replay every moment we shared together. And people will ask you those same questions. What will you tell your friends and family? All anyone needs to know is this. You missed your days as a bachelor, a different warm body every night. And I was jealous of your prestigious new position as the head of Asgard. There were personality differences, fights, resentment. And people will accept this.  _

_ But you will still want to find me, to punish me.  _

_ Now listen to me very carefully. If you ever go to the police or try to find me, know this. One, you will fail. You will never find me. Two, Asgard will be persecuted for having been in possession of the Tesseract. As I’m sure you know, owning it is a federal offence that will land anyone who knew of it in jail and bring about the ruin of Asgard. Everyone in your family, everyone in the world will know that Asgard attained its success through illegal means. Don’t put yourself through that. Don’t put your lovely mother through that. Just leave it be.  _

_ Okay, this is the hardest part. Saying goodbye. Thor, you must move on with your life. You are a good man with a great heart. If you weren’t, this probably wouldn’t have happened to you. You will find love again. I know it. And you will be the best CEO that Asgard has ever seen. I wish you luck. I wish you happiness.  _

_ Goodbye Thor Odinson. _

Thor shatters the screen. 

*******

Nebula drives them to a lavish hotel on a run down street. They ride the elevator up to the designated rendezvous point. Loki carries the Tesseract in a secure briefcase. He’s still sock footed. 

When Gamora knocks, the door opens almost immediately. “What took you so long?” Ronan’s words mirror the ones Gamora asked Loki not 30 minutes ago. 

“It hardly matters. We have it.” Loki pushes past Ronan into the room. Gamora and Nebula follow. The suite they’re in has several rooms, each leading further back from the door. Loki walks all the way to the far end. The last room is a dimly lit sitting space. In front of the flickering fireplace, a large man sits in a purple velvet armchair. He doesn’t acknowledge his four underlings walking into the room, just stares intently at the flames in front of him. 

“We have it,” Loki says. He sets the briefcase down heavily on the coffee table, opens it. 

The man finally looks up, at the Tesseract. Then he looks at Loki. A slow grin spreads over his scarred face. “Good boy.”

Loki resists the urge to prickle at being spoken to like a hound. Instead, he cocks his head with an exaggerated look of sweetness, bordering on sarcastic. “My pleasure.”

The man scoffs a laugh. He stands, towering over everyone in the room, and brings his huge hand up to cup Loki’s cheek. “You’ve done well, son.” He smooths Loki’s hair back, smudges his thumb against the green eyeshadow, then grips Loki’s chin, hard. “And for that I will overlook your unprofessionalism on this job. You can’t hide things from me, boy. If you get distracted on the next job, I will not be so forgiving.” He moves his hand down to cup the front of Loki’s throat, a direct inverse of Thor’s loving grip on the back of his neck. “I trust you remember what happened the last time you defied me.” 

Loki swallows beneath the large hand, pushes the phantom chime of classical music from his mind, nods.

“Good. Your next job is in America. You fly out tonight.” 

“Yes, Daddy.”

Thanos grins. “That’s my boy.”

  
  



	12. Miserables

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's see what those heartbroken fools are up to
> 
> comments and kudos make my day!

Thor paces his flat like a caged lion. The crunch of glass under his boots goes unheard as steps on the remnants of his laptop. He clenches his fists and imagines a throat beneath them. His mind is ablaze and there’s only one thought left unclouded by smoke.

What the hell is a 'Tesseract'?

With the last dredges of gas in his car, he drives to Asgard. Normally he’s a cautious, polite driver. Today he drives recklessly. The sound of car horns and squealing tires is soothing somehow. By the time he gets there, his mind is oddly quiet. 

He confronts Odin and learns that Asgard had indeed been in possession of the illegal item Luke had referenced in his video. The Tesseract. Apparently it’s a piece of AI technology that allowed them to hack into their competitor companies’ firewalls to track all of their personal files and sabotage them by leaking information that would cause controversy and bring the companies down. Much like what would happen to Asgard if word got out that they had been in possession of this Tesseract. 

He considers going to the authorities anyway. Let Asgard burn. Let Odin go to jail. His father isn’t the man he thought he was, anyway, and he doesn’t want anything to do with Asgard now that he knows. And he needs to find Luke. Ask him why. Or possibly strangle him. He’s undecided. 

But then he thinks of his mother, just as Luke’s video had said to do. Odin told Thor that she doesn’t know. Exposing the truth would hurt her. She would see Odin and their company for the sham that they are. She would lose her husband to a prison cell. He can’t do that to her. 

Which leaves Thor with no course of action left to take. Without being able to go to the authorities, he has no way of finding Luke. The man left with all of his money and Odin has cut him off, so he can’t hire a private investigator. 

Feeling a need to do something, anything, he searches every corner of his and Luke’s flat. He doesn’t even know what for. He searches for hours. All of Luke’s things are still there. He finds the silk nightgown he bought Luke for his birthday. He finds the matching pairs of boxer briefs with lightning and dagger prints that Luke got for them as a joke, but they both ended up wearing all the time. He finds a knot of black hair in the trash, pulled out of Luke’s brush. He finds the fancy blender that Luke had insisted upon getting so they could have milkshakes whenever they wanted. 

He finds Luke’s notebook of poetry, every page a rhyme about Thor’s hair or his lips or his ass. Luke used to read them aloud in his sweet moods. Thor slumps down on Luke’s favorite chair and reads every poem. With every melodramatic word, Thor’s anger melts away into something far worse, something that feels a lot like long, pale fingers wrapping around his heart and tearing. He sits there and cries until dark. Then he climbs into Luke’s side of the bed and continues to cry. 

Thor is miserable. 

***

Loki is miserable. 

He’s wearing close to nothing and dancing on a stage surrounded by a sea of grasping hands. There is just one pair of hands that he actually means to have touch him tonight, though. The owner of said hands is well into his cups and doing a strange drunken dance of his own where he stands amongst the spectators. It might be awhile until he calms down enough for Loki to be able to corner him. 

Loki looks up at the ceiling and dances, wanting to pretend he’s anywhere else. He thinks of the first time he danced with Thor, that time in the bar. His hands had felt so large and strong. The two of them had moved together in perfect rhythm. He had smelled like both sunshine and rain. Loki inhales, imagining it. 

His nose wrinkles. The smell of sweat and liquor brings him back to reality. He shakes the distracting thoughts from his mind and turns to reciting his newest mantra.

_ My name is Lucky. No last name. I left home at 18 and have been estranged from my family ever since. I am not smart or skilled, but I am beautiful. I am young, playful, and always up for a good time. I’m spoiled and a bit of a brat, but never do I truly lose my temper. I don’t take life seriously enough to have anything to get angry over. _

Loki looks back to the one he’s here for. The strange man has stopped his drunken dancing and is ogling Loki with his elbows resting on the circular stage. Finally. He’s noticed him. 

Loki hooks a leg around the pole and hoists himself onto it, wraps his arms and legs around the cold metal. He remembers how he used to climb Thor’s strong body just like this. Then he lets himself fall back, his legs still clinging to the pole, to rest his hands on the floor behind him. He leans his head back. He is nose to nose with the man he is here for. 

En Dwi Gast. 

After five days of working at the strip club, Loki’s plan is still going perfectly. He’s gotten much more one on one time with En Dwi since first getting his attention. 

He has no idea what to make of the man. He is probably the strangest person Loki’s met. Ever. Loki once again mentally curses Ronan’s files. They always seem to leave out some vital part of the mark’s personality. He’s had many marks over the years and there’s always some inconvenient surprise. 

Stephen’s file had left out his tendency to start meditating any time he felt stressed, no matter where he was. Tony’s had left out his proclivity for pop culture references that Loki had to pretend to understand. Brunnhilde’s had left out that, while usually an angry drunk, tequila makes her an over emotional one. Thor’s had left out his inhuman capacity for kindness, when Loki’s plan had revolved around the assumption that he was an arrogant ass. 

And then there’s En Dwi. Well, Loki has to admit that there probably isn’t room enough in one folder to list this man’s peculiarities. Loki’s currently straddling the older man and dancing obscenely while En Dwi makes strange cat-like purring noises, interspersed with the occasional yowl. 

It’s the fifth day in a row that the strange man has come to the club and requested Loki’s services specifically. Perfectly in accordance with Loki’s plan. The club is unpleasant and the company under him more so, but the relief of once more feeling in control outweighs all that. He spent his entire job conning Thor feeling out of control. But now he’s back to what he knows, which is playing rich fools for all they’re worth.

Right on schedule, En Dwi propositions Loki with the exact offer he’s been counting on. In the middle of a lap dance. Weird guy. “Mm, you know Pet, you’re the most, hmm, delicious thing I’ve found in a, uh, long time.” Loki does a figure eight with his hips that has En Dwi gasping and laughing. “Ah, uh, a pretty thing like you deserves to be, mm, well kept.” Loki grinds down on the older man. “Ah! Ha, yes, you deserve a throne. Luckily,” he grabs Loki’s hips and halts him so that he’s just sitting on the man’s lap, “you are, mm, sitting on a throne of wealth right - right now.”

Loki’s face slices itself into a sharp grin. He is back to doing what he knows, what he’s good at. He won’t screw this up like he did the last one. He can’t allow himself to be distracted again. Which means he has to exercise all thoughts of Thor from his mind. If the golden man knew the real Loki, he would hate him anyway. 

When En Dwi grabs his ass, Loki grins wider and grinds into his hands. 

“Keep talking.”

  
  



	13. Day 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Art at the end of the chapter....
> 
> Comments and kudos as appreciated as always

In the month following Luke’s disappearance, Thor hardly leaves his flat. He stops socializing, stops going to the gym, and just stops caring. He’s out of a job, so he doesn’t go there either. 

Any time one of his friends comes by his flat to try and talk to him, he yells at them until they leave. When his mother comes around with groceries, he sits silently while she talks at him, until she too leaves. None of them know the real reason Luke is gone. He’d rather they stay away than have to lie to them.

He thinks constantly about his time with Luke, going over every moment in his mind. Had he really planned this from the beginning? Or was it an idea that came to him once they were already together? 

He starts blaming himself somewhere around day three. Luke must have done this because Thor wasn’t good enough to him. If he had been able to make Luke happy, he wouldn’t have left. If Thor had just paid better attention… How could he have been so blind? 

On day 5, he drinks half the liquor in the house.

On day 6, he pours the rest of it down the drain. 

On day 10, he puts on the silk nightgown he bought for Luke, stretching it to the point of ripping. He goes to bed in the gown, holes gaping in the seams along the sides. It still smells like him. 

On day 10, he puts the matching lightning and dagger patterned boxers Luke bought them down the garbage disposal. It clogs the kitchen pipes. He starts exclusively using the bathroom sink.

On day 16, he chops his hair off. Luke had always loved playing with Thor’s hair. He would bury his fingers in it while Thor fucked him or tangle them in it and shove Thor facedown to fuck him. And sometimes he would just run his fingers through the strands and fold braids into them, weaving poems about their golden color. So Thor cuts it all off. He does a hack job of it, making irregular patterns in the sides. He leaves it. 

On day 22, he realizes he’s gained weight. He had lost a significant number of pounds while he’d been with Luke. He’d attributed it to constantly chasing the chaotic man around in zigzags as well as often letting Luke and his sweet tooth have Thor’s portion of dessert. But since Luke left, Thor has gained back all of what he’d lost in the half a year since they’d met, and then some. It’s the heaviest he’s ever been. He can’t bring himself to care.

On day 24, he wrecks everything in the house that still reminds him of Luke. There isn’t much left unscathed. Then he hurls both his and Luke’s wedding rings into the wreckage. He goes to rip off the silver Inguz bracelet too, but stops short. He wonders if Luke still has his matching gold one. He collapses onto the half demolished bed and cries. 

On day 26, he starts considering the sleeping pills in the medicine cabinet. 

On day 32, he takes the whole bottle. Then he throws them right back up and passes out.

On day 33, he wakes up on the bathroom floor to a loud banging sound. Eventually, he recognizes it as knocking. He makes no move to find out who it is. That is, until it’s joined by a voice.

“Open up! FBI, open up!”

He gets up and scrambles to open the door. On the other side is an intimidating woman in a suit. “Yes ma’am?” he asks, wild eyed. 

She flashes a badge. “FBI. There’s a problem with your husband. May I come in? Thank you.” Without waiting for Thor’s permission, she barges past him into the flat. 

“Hey, wait a minute,” Thor objects, somewhat half-heartedly. 

She looks around at the wrecked flat. “What the hell’s going on in here, buddy?”

“Oh, I - I was - housework.”

She gives him an unimpressed look and continues examining the room. As she inspects the smashed remains of Luke’s favorite chair she asks, “Are you Thor Odinson? Odin Borson’s son?”

“I am, yes. Although he might not like to acknowledge it these days.”

“Married to Luke Sutcliffe?”

“Well, uh… y - yes.” 

She turns to look at him sharply. “You don’t sound exactly sure. Are we talking about this,” she pulls a newspaper clipping out of her inner coat pocket, “Luke Sutcliffe?” She brandishes the paper showing his and Luke’s marriage announcement from the newspaper in Thor’s face.

“Yeah… Yeah, that’s him.” Thor furrows his brow uncertainly. Why would an FBI agent be looking for Luke? Then a thought occurs to him. “Oh my god, is he dead?” Tears spring to his eyes as he grabs the officer’s lapels.

“What? No, no.” She pulls back from his hands with a look of disgust. He realizes dispassionately that he probably smells. He can’t remember the last time he showered. “I need to know exactly where he is. Immediately,” she says.

“He - he left me, okay?” Thor sniffs. “All right? He’s gone. He - he took everything.” 

The officer shuts her eyes and lets out a harsh breath through her nose, clearly upset. She walks a few feet from him with overly controlled movements. Then punches the wall hard enough to leave a dent. “Shit!” 

Thor flinches. 

She visibly tries to calm herself down, still puffing like a dragon. Then she straightens her suit coat and turns back to him. “When did he leave?” she asks with forced calm. 

“Um, a month ago.” He’s starting to doubt this woman’s identity. This hardly seems like professional behavior. She hasn’t even told him her name. “Who the hell are you?”

“Federal Bureau of Investigation,” she says impatiently. “Did he leave a video, a sort of explanation video thing--”

“What was your name again?”

“I need to see that video.”

“Let me see that badge again.”

“That doesn’t matter, I need you to listen to me. I need to see the video--”

Thor laughs manically. “You’re not FBI,” His laugh turns to a scowl as he growls, “Where is he?” 

She grabs Thor by the front of the shirt and shoves him up against the wall, causing his head to crack deafeningly against it. “Let me see the fucking video!”

When his vision clears, Thor shoves her back, sending her flying into a broken table. “Where is he?!” he bellows. 

She comes back and grabs his arm, yanking it painfully behind his back. “I need you to listen to me!”

Thor grabs hold of her with his other arm and throws his body forward, sending her flying over his shoulder onto the shredded couch. “Where is he? You know where he is!” He jumps on top of her, keeping her pinned and warding off her flailing arms. “Who are you?!”

She kicks and punches him, several good hits landing heavily on his face and stomach. He can feel blood dripping down his brow. 

Finally she cries, “I’m his wife!”

Thor stops. 

“Yeah, that’s right asshole. He’s my husband too, just like you.”

Thor scrambles off of her and falls off the couch. 

“We married the same man and he took us both,” she pants. 

Thor just stares at her, too shocked to start processing. Luke has… a wife? 

She continues seething. “He took me for everything I had. Lost me my place at Valkyrie Industries, stole every last cent to my name, broke my goddamn heart. That fucking bastard--” 

Thor hits her. “Don’t call him that.” 

She straightens her head back up and spits blood onto the cushion, smirks. “So, you gonna help me find him?”


	14. The Photograph

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up, I have this fic drafted out all the way to the end, but I'm editing and adding/subtracting scenes as I go. So if you have suggestions/preferences don't hesitate to shoot them my way! I'm always open to feedback. Shoutout to hebravelyranaway for offering up a scene request already <3

Thor learns her name is Brunnhilde and she’s from Liverpool. They sit out on the balcony with ice packs pressed to their various hurts. They tell each other their stories.

“I knew him as Lachlan. We met at Alcoholics Anonymous. When I first saw him, I thought he was some kind of bad boy. He rode up to the meeting on a bright red motorcycle, dressed completely in leather. But then he got up in front of the group and told his story. He was a war vet, like me. He didn’t talk nearly so harsh as he looked. It was like seeing a sheep in wolf’s clothing. Most men are the opposite, you know,” she says with a smirk.

Thor snorts. “Luke was more like a snake in a suit.”

She gives him an odd look, but continues. “He was a bike mechanic. He taught me to ride. And he was a Buddhist, which suited him. He was the most peaceful person I’d ever met. He never raised his voice or had a mean word to say about anybody. We only dated for four months before he proposed. But I didn’t hesitate. Guys like him don’t come along every day.” She pauses, looking out over the view of the city. “We were only married for three days before he disappeared. He took all my money. And - and something that lost me my job as Vice President of Valkyrie Industries.”

Thor looks up in surprise. “You worked for Valkyrie Industries? With Hela?

She raises an eyebrow. “Yeah, she’s the president. You know her?”

“She’s my sister. Well, sort of. She’s 15 years older than me and our father disowned and excommunicated her when I was 10, so I never really knew her.” 

Brunnhilde blinks at him. “Didn’t you say that your father just disowned you too?”

He scratches the back of his neck sheepishly. “Yeah, I guess you could say he has kind of a go-to way for dealing with his problems.”

Brunnhilde snorts at that. “Sounds like. Well, anyway, after Lachlan left I fell off the wagon and drank myself into a stupor for several months. Then, one day I had the thought that I should be out there tracking him down so I can beat his face in. So I got started searching. I got no where, of course. Really, it was just by luck that I made a trip to London to visit my mother and picked up a newspaper to find Lachlan’s face staring back at me.” 

Thor is still trying to process everything that’s happened in the last hour. “Okay, so… Luke pretended to be this bad boy biker guy that--”

“Stop. Stop that,” she scolds. “Luke doesn’t exist, okay? Lachlan probably doesn’t either. He’s a con artist and--”

“No, no. I see how it looks like that,” Thor hurries to correct. The idea of Luke not being real is too horrifying to consider. “But our - our relationship, the way we were with each other--”

“What? He completed you? He made you a better person? Well, Lachlan made me finally feel human and get sober for the first time since I went to war. He was the best thing that ever happened to me. Wake up, idiot. That’s what he does.”

Cowed, Thor quiets. 

“You need to accept that he never cared about you. He never cared about me. He played us to get our money.”

“So why didn’t you go the police?” Thor asks, indignant.

She looks at him warily. “He didn’t just take my money. I told you before that he took something else that lost me my job.” Thor nods, vaguely remembering that. “He stole something from Valkyrie Industries, an illegal piece of technology called the ‘Aether’. I didn’t know of it before that. Hela kept it secret. Apparently, she was somehow able to use it to wipe the hard drives of all our competitors’ computer systems. I guess that's why our company was so successful. She told me that if I ever went to the police, she would implicate me.” She looks sad, betrayed, confused. 

Thor understands those feelings perfectly. A little too perfectly. “He took something illegal from Asgard as well. Something I didn’t know about. My father had something called the ‘Tesseract’ that allowed him to track our competitor companies’ systems for sensitive information on their top execs. He used that information to cause scandals that brought their companies down.” 

Brunnhilde looks at him wide-eyed. “That’s gotta be connected! He must be specifically targeting people with access to illegal technologies.”

“Yeah, but how? You and I didn’t even know our companies had them. How would he have known?”

“I don’t know,” she concedes.

They sit in silence for a while. Thor can’t seem to wrap his head around this whole illegal technology dilema thingy. Hell, he’s still trying to picture Luke having an alternate life where he has a wife and rides a motorcycle. “Do you have a picture of… Lachlan?” 

She gives him a long look before pulling one up on her phone and handing it to him. 

The picture is of his Luke. He looks exactly the same. Except for how he doesn’t. His features are unchanged and he’s still pale as a ghost and thin as a whip, but everything else is different. He has curly red hair that reaches to his shoulders. He’s wearing a garishly decorated leather jacket that Luke wouldn’t have been caught dead in, or so Thor would have thought before seeing this picture. Even his expression looks different. It’s spread in a wide, carefree smile and shows a kind of peace that Thor never saw on Luke’s face. 

Suddenly he feels ill. 

He pulls up a picture of Luke on his own phone. He sees the subtle disquiet that always seemed to haunt his love’s eyes, never quite at peace. Thor had known there was something broken inside of Luke, had strived to be the glue that could hold him together. He would have spent the rest of his life happily helping Luke fill the fractures in his mind. Now Thor feels as though his own mind has been shattered. 

Amidst the rubble of his thoughts, an idea makes it through. “Hey, what do you know about facial recognition software?”

Brunnhilde looks at him in surprise. Then she grins. “Thor Odinson, I take back what I said about you being an idiot.”

*******

They find a guy that offers a facial recognition service. The shop is full of binoculars, hidden cameras, and other weird spy-esque stuff. The fee for running a picture through facial recognition is $1,000. Between the cash in their wallets and pawning their watches, they have just enough to cover it, plus $20 to spare. 

“How long before we know the results?” Brunnhilde asks the guy once they’ve paid. 

“An hour, a day, a week, who knows,” he says, dismissively. “I’ll call you when I have something.”

After they leave, they return to Thor’s flat, where he sets to clearing the broken things out of the living room to give them a place to sit while they wait. 

“I’m starving,” Brunnhilde says. She opens his fridge. It’s empty, except for a block of cheese. She opens the cabinets. They only contain two boxes of poptarts and a can of corn. 

They use their last $20 to get groceries. Then they finish clearing out the living room and sit on the shredded couch to eat. They seem to have an unspoken agreement to avoid the topic of their shared husband. Instead, they talk about their mothers, their childhoods, their tastes in music. It would almost feel like a date, except that they’re here because they are both in love with the same man. Eventually, they fall asleep on the couch, half draped over each other. 

Thor wakes up early the next morning to his phone vibrating in his pocket. He shoves Brunnhilde’s foot off his face and sits up. She stops snoring and lets out an undignified grunt. Thor looks at the caller ID. It’s the guy they hired yesterday. He answers eagerly. “Yes, hello?” Brunnhilde sits up to listen. 

“Thor Odinson?” the guy asks.

“Yes, that’s me.”

“I’ve got something.”

*******

They rush to the shop where the guy works. As soon as they’re inside, the guy is pulling out a folder. “I got a hit. It looks like your guy is a model. The pictures you gave me matched with a nude shot.” He smirks. 

Thor growls at the letch. 

Brunnhilde grabs the folder and snaps it open. Inside there’s just a single picture. It’s Luke, but with long blonde hair. He’s completely naked except for some smokey makeup on his eyes, bright red lipstick, and pump heels. His pubes and sparse leg hair are shaved away.

Brunnhilde makes a curious noise. “He almost looks like a woman.” 

Thor glances at her. He supposes Luke hadn’t told her he was genderqueer, seeing as he had only figured that out once he was with Thor. Then he realizes that even that may have been a lie. If Lachlan and Luke are so completely different, most of what both he and Brunnhilde know of their husband was probably just an act. 

He feels sick again, so he looks back at the guy. “Where’s the rest of the information? Did you find a location?”

“Oh, yeah, I got his exact address.”

Thor and Brunnhilde look at each other in awe. “What is it?”

“It’ll be another $5,000 if you want that information.”

“What? You said it was $1,000,” Brunnhilde says. 

“I said it was $1,000 to find your guy. It’s $5,000 if you want the intel.”

“What? That’s bullshit!” Brunnhilde yells. 

Thor scowls deeply. “You scammed us!”

“Hey, it’s my establishment you’re in. I make the rules. Now pay or get out.”

Thor picks a third option. He grabs the guy and drags him out over the desk. He fists his hands in the guy’s shirt and lifts him up to his tiptoes. 

“What. Is. The address?”

Address in hand, they leave the store chipper. Until they realize. 

“Hold on. He lives in New York. How are we going to afford flying to the United States?”

They dig Thor and Luke’s wedding rings out of the debris in Thor’s flat. They pawn them to pay for plane tickets. 

*******

When they land in New York, they head straight to the address. They decide to skip the FBI shtick, since it hadn’t worked too well last time. They give a taxi driver the address and find themselves distributed in front of a very large, expensive condominium in Manhattan. The front door is locked. 

Thor huffs. “Now what? How are we supposed to get inside?”

Brunnhilde rolls her eyes and and pulls a lock pick out of her jacket pocket. 

Thor baulks. “Where did you get one of those?”

“I stole it from the asshole we hired to find our guy.” Thor remembers all the weird spy stuff the guy had for sale, has a thought to reprimand Brunnhilde for stealing. He doesn’t. 

He stands watch while she works. It takes a long time. “Have you ever done this before?”

“Shockingly, no,” she snaps, “I’ve never had occasion to break into a building before.”

Luckily, no one comes along in the hour it takes her to get it unlocked. When she does, Thor lets out a loud whoop before she slaps her hand over his mouth. “We’re sneaking in, remember? It’d be best not to draw attention to ourselves.”

Inside, they find a directory for where each apartment is located. They peruse it until they locate the correct one. It’s the penthouse, which takes up the entire top floor of the building. 

“Hot damn, our guy is rich,” Brunnhilde whistles. 

“Well, he did take all of our money,” Thor points out. She winces.

They get in the elevator and ride it all the way up. It leaves them in a small entry area in front of a single door. They knock.

They wait for a solid minute before the door opens to reveal a short, fit middle aged guy with a goatee. He’s wearing a bathrobe over a tank top and pajama pants, rubbing his eyes sleepily. “Yeah? Who’re you?”

Thor and Brunnhilde glance at each other. Well, this isn’t what they expected. “Who are you?” Brunnhilde asks.

Goatee guy stops rubbing his eye and looks at them more carefully. “I asked first. Also, you’re the assholes that knocked on my door. So let me repeat it for you. Who the hell are you?” 

Thor shakes himself and pulls out the picture of blonde model Luke, folded to just show his head. “Do you know this man?”

Goatee guy glares, but looks down at the picture. Then his eyes blow wide and he inhales sharply. 

“That’s my wife!”

  
  



	15. Commonalities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Revengers take on a slightly different configuration in this AU...... but fear not, Bruce will make his appearance later!

“Your wife?” Brunnhilde and Thor ask in unison. They look back down at the picture. Well, he does look quite feminine. But still, what?

Goatee guy’s face turns panicked. “Wait, is she dead?”

“What? No… he - she is--” Thor stutters.

The door shuts in their faces. They blink at it.

Brunnhilde curses colorfully. "He isn't here. This is just another poor sap like us." 

Thor looks a Brunnhilde for a moment and then back at the door. He yells through it, “We’re looking for her! We’ve tracked her all the way from London!”

The door opens a crack to reveal a suspicious glare on goatee guy’s face. “Why are you looking for her?”

Brunnhilde grabs the picture from Thor and holds it up next to her phone, which shows a picture of Lachlan. “This person is my husband too.”

Thor pulls up a picture of Luke on his phone and adds that to the lineup. “And mine.”

Goatee guy baulks at the pictures and then at Thor and Brunnhilde’s faces. “Fuck. London you say? Well that explains why I couldn’t find her.” 

“Did she con you too?” Thor asks. He had known Luke as genderqueer. He’d told Thor he was fine with most any pronouns, so the pronoun switch is not difficult. He can see that Brunnhilde, however, has questions burning on her tongue about it. 

Goatee guy sighs. “Come in.”

He leads them to sit in a large, modern living room that connects to a raised bar in an open floor plan. One entire wall is made of glass, looking out over Manhattan. “Drink? He asks.

“Please. Vodka,” Brunnhilde requests. Thor gives her a concerned look. Hadn’t she said she was in AA? She rolls her eyes at him. “I told you I fell off the wagon when Lachlan left. I have no intention of hopping back on anytime soon.”

Thor decides it’s not really his place to question that. “I’ll have a scotch, neat.” He thinks of Luke. Their shared taste for scotch was what had led to their first interaction. 

Goatee guy brings the drinks over to the sitting area. Thor realizes that maybe he should find out what to call him, other than ‘goatee guy’. “Uh… what’s your name?”

Goatee guy quickly lowers the drink from his lips, laughing. “Guess I forgot to introduce myself before inviting you inside my house. I’m Tony Stark.”

Thor and Brunnhilde both let out surprised gasps. “Tony Stark? As in head of Stark Industries?” Brunnhilde asks. 

“The former head,” Tony corrects. “Back when there was still a body.” He takes a long pull of his cocktail. “If you’ve paid any attention to the news, you’ll know that my company went under last year. It no longer exists.”

Thor does remember hearing about that. Stark Industries was the biggest high tech weapons manufacturer in the world. 

Tony goes on, “When Elle left, she took everything. Much like she did to you, I imagine. And it wasn’t just my personal accounts she drained. She stole something that gave her access to the company funds and drained all of that too. Of course, then we didn’t have money to continue operating. We tried to get money from investors, but everyone abandoned us. I couldn’t tell anyone why we were suddenly bankrupt, Elle made sure of that when she blackmailed me. And with the sort of people who invest in weapons manufacturing, exposing that you aren’t producing enough money to fund yourself this far into the game makes you a bad investment. Of course, without money, we had to declare bankruptcy and the company closed. I only have this place still,” he motions of the penthouse around them, “because I inherited it from my father. It was paid off long ago.” 

Thor is actually kind of impressed. As awful as it is that Luke would do this to all of them, bringing down a giant company like Stark Industries is damn impressive. But he puts on a somber face and gives Tony his condolences. 

Tony waves off Thor and Brunnhilde’s attempts at comfort. “All of us combining our collective misery over being betrayed by the same wife won’t get us anywhere.” He drains the last of his drink. 

Brunnhilde flaps her hand at him. “Hold up, pause, pause. Tony, you keep referring to him as ‘she’ and ‘wife’. And Thor, you keep switching pronouns! Someone explain.”

Tony looks surprised. “Elle was trans. Was she not with you?”

Brunnhilde shakes her head. “I knew him as Lachlan, a cis man.”

“And Luke was genderqueer. He didn’t really have a preference with pronouns. He generally just went by he/him.”

Brunnhilde sighs and reclines into an ungraceful sprawl on her armchair. “So he wasn’t even the same goddamned gender with any of us. This guy really has no limits.”

Thor considers that. It gives him some hope that maybe Luke being genderqueer is the true one. It’s certainly the middle ground of all of them. Now that he thinks about it, it’s even consistent with what Luke had said about having identity issues from trying to be what other people wanted for so long. He has a hard time believing there wasn’t some truth to that. 

“Well, fuck. Not even really trans. I’ll be.” Tony drains the rest of his glass. 

Brunnhilde lifts her heard from where it’s slumped against the chair and looks at Tony. “We don’t know that,” she says kindly. “Maybe this person really is trans and just plays men for some of their roles? We each knew them as a different gender. Any one of them could be true. Or none of them”

“How about we all just continue to use the pronouns that feel right to us? When we find him, then he can tell us the correct one himself,” Thor says, with humor. They agree. 

Thor recalls something else Tony had said in his spiel about Elle. “Tony, you said Elle got access to your company’s money and was able to drain it. How did she do that?”

Tony looks uncomfortable. “ She, uh, used a piece of tech that she stole from me to do it.” 

Thor and Brunnhilde share a look. “What kind of tech would let someone do that?” Brunnhilde asks. 

Tony clears his throat nervously. “Okay, well, you guys have to promise not to turn me in to the cops if I tell you. Although, seeing as you haven’t gone to them already, I’m guessing I wasn’t the only one she blackmailed.” 

Thor and Brunnhilde both nod. 

Tony sighs. “My father started the company. But back then, no one believed he could make the kind of high tech weapons that he claimed he could. No one would fund his research. But he was able to attain a piece of AI tech that could siphon money from the other companies in the weapons industry. He called it the Scepter. Elle used it against Stark Industries the same way my father used it against those other companies.” He looks at them imploringly. “But I haven’t used it since he died. It’s been locked away, unused, for years.”

Thor gives him an understanding smile. “My father also had a piece of illegal technology that targeted our competitors. So did Hela, Brunnhilde’s boss. We think he’s targeting people with powerful illegal technologies.”

Tony looks gobsmacked. “There are more of them? You think that’s why she chose us?”

“We don’t know how they’re related, but it’s too big of a coincidence. He went into this knowing that we had them,” Brunnhilde says. 

“But if he was just after illegal tech, why did he bother taking all of our money too?” Thor realizes it’s a stupid question the moment it leaves his mouth.

In a tone that tells him she agrees with that assessment, Brunnhilde responds, “Why wouldn’t he? As your spouse he already has access to your accounts and he’s already stealing stuff anyway. Might as well. Besides, he needs money to fund his little con.” 

“Well, I guess we’ll just have to ask her about that too, once we find her.” Tony claps his hands together. “Now. When Elle first left, I was too busy trying to save my company to be able to do much in the way of looking for her. And after I lost the company on top of losing her, I was too depressed to look for her. But now I have my own Turner and Hooch here to motivate me. So tell me, how did you track our Hyde this far?” He looks at them expectantly. 

Thor clears his throat. “Well, Brunnhilde found me when she saw Luke and my engagement in a newspaper. Luke was who Elle was when I knew him. Then, Brunnhilde and I scrounged up enough money to have his face run through facial recognition software. That led us here.”

Tony hums. “So you have no plan for where to go from here?”

“Not really, no.”

Tony stands and collects their glasses, which have all been emptied in record time. “Well, I have an idea.” He walks to the bar, sets down the dirty glasses, and then walks out of the room down a hallway. 

Thor looks after him and then turns to Brunnhilde. “Are we meant to follow?” She shrugs. Before they can decide, Tony is coming back. He’s dragging a large black trash bag behind him. Thor has the morbid thought that he has Luke’s body in there. 

Then Tony upends the bag onto the floor in the middle of the room. “This is all the stuff I was left with that reminded me of Elle. Maybe we can find some clues in here. Take a look. See if anything stands out to you.”

Thor and Brunnhilde set to sifting. Thor finds paintings, dresses, and an alarming number of sex toys. Brunnhilde uncovers a stack of photos showing Luke with long blonde hair - Elle, Thor corrects himself - wearing an elegant dress, her wrist prominently displaying some kind of high tech smart watch. They are clearly model shots. He thinks of the nude photo they found. “Tony, was Elle a model?”

He smiles. “Yeah, she was. Striking pictures, huh? Those are from the job I hired her for. That was how we met. I was the first to hire her since she moved here from France.”   
“Wait, France?” Brunnhilde asks. “Was Elle not British?”

“No, she was French. She was British with you?”

“Yeah,” Thor says, “Luke had a super posh British accent.”

Brunnhilde snorts. “Lachlan was full on cockney.”

They all shake their heads at yet another earth shattering realization about just how badly they were fooled. It’s actually starting to lose the shock value by this point. 

“At least we know he’s a natural redhead. That’s one thing,” Brunnhilde says. 

Thor frowns. “No, he has naturally black hair.”

She scoffs. “Dude, have you ever seen a caucasian guy that pale with naturally black hair?”

“His pubes were black.”

Brunnhilde blinks. “Lachlan’s pubes were red.”

They both turn to Tony. “Hey, don’t look at me. Elle waxed everything.” He tilts his head to the side. “But yikes. That means with at least one of you she dyed her pubes. Commitment, that.”

“So we really know truly nothing about him.” Brunnhilde sighs. 

“That gives me a new idea,” Tony announces. He walks out of the room again. This time he returns with a rolling whiteboard. He positions it to stand in front of the seating area and uses the sleeve of his robe to wipe some equations off of it. 

“We should brainstorm for similarities between Lachlan, Luke, and Elle. If we can find some commonalities it might help us learn something about the real person behind them all.” He stands by the whiteboard, brandishing a thick, black marker. 

“Good Idea!” Thor exclaims. He can see how Tony managed to head up such a successful company for so long. The guy is smart. Thor moves to a chair closer to the whiteboard. 

Brunnhilde does not seem impressed, merely grunting in response. But she also moves closer to the whiteboard, sprawling on the floor in front of it. 

“Okay, Point Break. What’s something about Luke that stuck out?” Tony asks. 

Thor glares at him for the nickname. Tony just shrugs at him. Thor huffs and says, “He really liked sweets.”

“Elle avoided high calorie food.”

“Lachlan preferred spicy food.”

“Okay, Brienne of Tarth. Your turn, go,” Tony directs. 

Brunnhilde just looks confused at her own nickname. Apparently she decides it isn’t worth asking. “Well, he was a war veteran.”

“Not Elle.”

“Not Luke either.”

The whiteboard remains empty.

“Elle had a strained relationship with her parents.”

“Lachlan’s parents, or I guess someone he hired to pose as them, were at our wedding.”

“Luke’s parents were dead.”

Thor thinks for a moment, then says, “Luke had a weird sensitivity about his neck.”

“I never noticed that.”

“Me either.”

Tony snaps his fingers. “Elle had a severe allergy to shellfish. Avoided it like crazy.”

“Lachlan loved seafood.”  
“Luke would eat seafood, he wasn’t allergic.”

Brunnhilde’s shrugs.  “Lachlan was the biggest coffee addict I’ve ever met.”

“Elle too. Even at night I’d catch her drinking it.” 

“Yeah, Luke was a total grouch if he didn’t get his coffee!”

Thor and Brunnhilde jump up in excitement.

“Shit guys, we got something!” Tony hurriedly scribbles it on the whiteboard. Then they all stand back and look expectantly at the messily scrawled,  _ Likes coffee _ .

After a few long moments, Tony deflates. “I guess that doesn’t really tell us much, does, it?”

Discouraged, they sit back down and go back to thinking.

After a few minutes, Brunnhilde slaps the floor loudly. “Guys, we’ve been complete idiots! Lachlan, Luke, Elle… All of his fake names either start with or sound like the letter ‘L’.”

“Oh my god, you’re right!” Tony writes it down. They stand back again to look at the whiteboard.

_ Likes coffee _

_ L name  _

“That still doesn’t really get us anywhere.” They go back to thinking.

Thor perks up when he thinks of something. “Luke was genderqueer. And Elle was transgender. Brunnhilde, did Lachlan fit into the LGBTQI+ community in any way?”

“Not really. I mean, he was cool with all that, but he was a straight cis man.”

“But still, it’s common to two of them. Does that count?” They decide it doesn’t.

This happens a lot. Lachlan and Luke were both British, but Elle was French. Both Lachlan and Elle came from troubled roots, but Luke didn’t. Luke and Lachlan both displayed short tempers at times, but Elle was meek. Elle and Luke loved reading, but Lachlan liked movies. 

Ninety minutes later they have four things written on the whiteboard: 

_ Likes coffee _

_ L name _

_ Eats a lot _

_ Hates classical music _

“Well that tells us a fat load of nothing.”

  
  



	16. Swallow Some Camels

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um. I had way too much fun with this.

They’ve been sitting dejectedly for a long time, trying and failing to think of new ideas. At some point, Tony had taken the time to print out pictures of Elle, Luke and Lachlan. He is currently sitting on the floor looking at them. “God, she looks goth as hell with black hair. Straight up Morticia.”

Thor glares at him. 

“Hey, buddy, I didn’t mean it as a personal insult to your taste or anything. I just… she looks so different.”

Thor sighs. “I know."

Tony looks back at the pictures. “What was she like with - with you guys?”

Brunnhilde’s eyes are distant when she replies. “Lachlan was… gentle. He was a war vet turned biker and when I first met him I thought he was a total fuck boy. I wanted nothing to do with him. But then I saw his compassion. He was always so nice to everybody. Well, unless someone touched his bike without permission. That glare could set a person on fire. But with me he was always kind. And he was quiet. He rarely felt much need for words. He was a Buddhist and meditated a lot. He taught me the value of silence. And he had the best smile. It just radiated calming, joyful vibes. He always wore it too, was always smiling. And he was endlessly patient. With me. And my problems. He looked like a total bad boy, always wearing that damn leather jacket. But he was the gentlest person I’d ever met.”

Lachlan sounds so different from Luke. Thor can’t picture his love as a smiley, quiet, leather-clad biker. It feels surreal to even acknowledge that they’re the same person. It makes him itch.

Tony is smiling, though. “Elle was gentle too. She was so sweet and giving. But so strong. She was a model, you know. She’d had some success in France and had just moved to New York to try and get her start here. But it wasn’t for personal gain. She wanted to make trans people visible and accepted by the whole world. She endeavored to help lead that charge. And she was always so encouraging of my own ambitions. She would talk as though I’d already achieved the thing I was aiming for, like it was a foregone conclusion that I would succeed. She made me feel like I could do anything.”

Thor is talking before he even knows he means to. 

“Luke wasn’t gentle. He wasn’t sweet either. He was like a rose: it looks beautiful, but when you pick it up it cuts you. When we first met, he always tried to be so in control of himself, all the time. Always suave and classy. But there were cracks in the mask. Every now and then I’d get a peek at his snark or his biting anger. The more time we spent together, the more that mask seemed to fall away to reveal the man I really fell in love with. That man could spin the most complex of insults at the drop of a dime. And he was funny, painfully so. He constantly had me in stitches with his wit. He was generally the smartest person in the room, and he wouldn’t hesitate to inform you of it. He was like a self-crowned prince, always strutting around, expecting the world to kneel at his feet. But, more than anything, he was exciting. Being with him was like being on a roller coaster. I always imagined his mind must be a chaotic place. One minute he would snuggle up to you and the next he was pushing you away. He could go from plying you with compliments just to turn them all into insults with a single word in the next moment. He would be yelling at me one minute and tearing my clothes off the next. I once had the thought that, if the mood struck him, he might poison me just to to be able to give me the antidote.”

When Thor realizes how long he’s been talking, he stops, looks up. Brunnhilde and Tony’s eyes are a little wide. 

Tony laughs. “Damn, Point Break. You have quite the bizarre type. Guy sounds exhausting.”

“He sounds like a dick,” Brunnhilde supplies.

Thor frowns. “No, he was just…” He tries to find the words. “It almost felt like he should have been some kind of alien or even a cosmic being. He was so peculiar and so self assured in being contrary. Everything about him seemed to be an exception to the world around him. He never did what was expected or said what was on other people’s minds. Being around him felt special because you knew you would never meet another of his kind.”

“I guess I sort of know what you mean,” Tony says. “Elle was like no one I’d ever met.” He laughs. “This one time I came home to find her sitting in the bathtub, which she had filled with orange wedges. She said it was some sort of detoxifying thing that would draw all the bad stuff out through her pores. So I joined her in the tub, oranges squishing between my toes, and proceeded to draw something else out of her.” He winks.

“Oh, ew Tony!” Brunnhilde shouts. “We don’t wanna hear about your sex life.”

“Oh, if you think that’s kinky--”

“Brunnhilde, what’s one of your favorite memories of Lachlan?” Thor cuts in, not wanting to hear where that was going. The thought of Luke sleeping with Tony is… distressing. 

Brunnhilde stops glaring at Tony to answer Thor. “Hmm. I guess the time he took me on his motorcycle for the first time. It felt special because I knew he barely let anyone so much as touch the thing. He drove me out into the hills and at the top of the highest one he stopped. We just sat there and looked out over the horizon for a really long time. It was the first time I’d been so comfortable being with someone for so long without words.”

Thor laughs a bit. “Luke was rarely quiet. Or, at least, it never felt like it because he could say twice as much with just his facial expressions as most people could in a thousand words. But truly, he almost always had some commentary to contribute to any given situation.”

Tony laughs. “Yeah, Elle could be quite the chatterbox. This one time I took her stargazing and she spent the entire time naming the constellations and galaxies.”

That reminds Thor of a memory that always makes him smile. “I tried to stargaze with Luke once, too. I had gone to the bathroom in the middle of the night and noticed the stars were far brighter than usual. I went and woke Luke. He told me, ‘You’d better have a damned good reason for pulling me out of bed at 2am.’ I took him out onto the balcony, pointed up, and told him, ‘The stars are trying to shine as brightly as my love for you tonight.’ He said ‘Aw, how romantic.’ Then he stalked back into our bedroom, shut the door, and locked it. I was stuck out on the balcony for the rest of the night.”

Tony and Brunnhilde give Thor a funny look as he smiles as the memory. 

Brunnhilde clears her throat. “Lachlan was pretty poetic about stars and rainbows and everything like that. He could make any little thing into a sign from the universe or whatever. I used to tease him for being too romantic.”

Tony grins. “I always teased Elle that she loved her books more than she loved me. She was constantly reading and quoting stuff back to me.”

Thor grins. “Luke was always one for words too, but he often chose odd ones. My friends and I always gave him a hard time for his weird way of talking. His nickname for me was Oaf, which is just ridiculous. Who uses that word? And he had all these funny little sayings. Like, ‘_ Swallow some camels _.’ He always insisted it meant--”

“ ‘_ Admit you’re wrong _’,” Brunnhilde completes for him. 

Tony smiles, eyes far away. “She said that to me too.” Then his brow furrows. “Wait, that’s a commonality, right? Why would she say such a strange thing as part of all three characters? That’s gotta be the real person behind them all talking.”

Brunnhilde’s eyes widen. “Hey, you’re right. Thor, you said he used a lot of weird sayings. What were some others?”

“Uh, once he told me I’d done him a ‘_ bear favor _’. He didn’t even bother explaining that one, just said the name of some French guy.”

“Jean de La Fontaine,” Tony fills in. “He’s a French poet. Elle told me ‘_ bear favor _’ was from some fable of his. It means like, having good intentions, but doing more harm than good.” Tony scratches his head. “But Elle was French, or so I thought. I figured that was why she knew it. Maybe she really is French?” 

There’s a note of hope to Tony’s voice when he says the last part. Thor understands it. He too can’t help hoping for evidence that the man he’d known hadn’t been a complete lie. 

“Hey, that’s actually a good point,” Brunnhilde says. “Lachlan always seemed to expect people to already know the meanings behind his weird sayings. I always figured that was just him trying to be funny, but maybe he really does think those are normal sayings? Maybe in French they are normal?” She grabs her phone and starts typing. 

“What are you doing?” Thor asks.

“I’m Googling ‘swallow some camels’ to find out if it has French origins.”

Excited at the prospect of finally finding something useful about the real Loki, Thor and Tony scramble up and over to Brunnhilde where she’s lounging on the floor. They both crouch next to her, looking over either of her shoulders. The search leads them to several sites which all agree that ‘_ swallow some camels _’ is a Norwegian saying. 

“Ah man, it’s not French,” Tony says. “I guess she just collects weird sayings from random languages. Strange hobby.”

“Wait. I want to check something else.” Brunnhilde types “_ bear favor _ ” into the search bar. She taps on a result explaining the origins of the term. The site informs them that “ _ bear favor _” does indeed come from a French fable. However, it also says that it’s commonly used as a saying in several other countries. Including Norway.

“He’s not French. He’s Norwegian,” Thor says, gobsmacked. Did they just learn their first real bit of information about the man behind all of their spouses? “Hey, type in ‘_ Norwegian sayings _’ so we can see if we recognize any more.”

Brunnhilde types it in and taps a result that says, “_ 50 Norwegian Sayings that Make No Sense _”.

They’ve been in hysterics for nearly an hour. 

“ ‘_ Like the yoke in the egg _’!” Tony exclaims between giggles, “She said that to me all the time.”

“Me too!” Brunnhilde laughs. 

“Oh, look at this one,” Thor points to the next on the list. “Luke always used to ask if I was ‘_ born behind a brown cheese _’.”

Brunnhilde gives him that funny look again. “This says that’s an insult. It means ‘_ you’re stupid _’.”

Tony’s still snickering when he asks, “Did she even try to pretend she liked you, Point Break? I mean, she at least did a good job faking being in love with me, Brunnhilde too by the sound of it. But she called you stupid, nicknamed you Oaf, and locked you out of your own bedroom. I dunno man, sounds like Morticia kinda disliked you.”

Brunnhilde smirks. “Yeah, I’ve gotta say, Thor. It sounds like he pretty much hated you. Enough that he couldn’t keep it hidden under ‘Luke’, even with his acting skills.” 

“No, no, that was just always his way,” Thor hurries to correct them. “He didn’t mean any harm by it. You know, he’s like a cat. You can only pet them for so long before they scratch you.” 

They both just look at him. 

“But like, a friendly scratch! Or like, uh-- a love bite.” Thor demonstrates with a delicate bite to his own hand. 

Tony and Brunnhilde both laugh so hard they fall over. 

*******

Thor and Brunnhilde crash in Tony’s spare rooms. The penthouse really is giant.

As Thor settles in, Tony and Brunnhilde’s words reverberate in his mind. He tries not to let it get to him. But he’s already doubting everything so much, that he has to wonder. Did Luke really hate him? The one good thing about discovering that he hadn’t been the only target of Luke’s was that he could finally stop blaming himself. Luke was a con artist. He had planned to take everything from the beginning. But this also meant that nothing about their relationship, about Luke’s personality could be trusted. 

He now has two other accounts of the same man which report different food preferences, genders, temperaments, nationalities, everything. They’ve all but confirmed that he’s actually from Norway, so even that beautiful accent of his was fake. Thor has to doubt that any of it was real. And now he has to doubt whether Luke ever even liked him at all. Because Tony and Brunnhilde have a point. Luke had not started out prickly and sharp tongued when Thor first met him. That had only been revealed when Thor clawed at the mask. He had even intentionally annoyed Luke just to get a rise out of the man. But what if what was under that mask was not the quirky, unique personality he thought it was? What if it was Luke’s hatred for him leaking out and clashing with the carefully constructed ‘Luke mask’?

Part of Thor feels guilty for even considering that everything he loved about Luke had been fake or merely provoked out of hatred. It feels like betraying him. Another part of Thor wants to fling every biting accusation at Luke that he can. Everything hurts and he’s desperate to feel the anger that he knows should be his reaction. But he just misses Luke so goddamn much.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bear in mind that Tony and Brunnhilde are both in chaotic mental states, just like Thor. They don't really intend to be mean. Imagine three ex-spouses of the same person sitting together. There would be camaraderie but there would also be some competition, some jealousy, some friction. At least at first.


	17. Back to School

The next morning, the three of them sit down for breakfast. Evidently, Tony can still afford food, which is more than Thor or Brunnhilde can say for themselves at the moment. Apparently, when the company closed several months back, Tony had to sell all of their equipment. What little of the proceeds didn’t go to all the employees and clients that he owed money to is now his grocery fund. It’s gotten desperately low, though. 

As they eat, Thor muses aloud. “You know, it’s kind of funny that Luke - or, whoever he is - is actually Norwegian. It’s a funny coincidence. My ancestors are all Norwegian. My father even insisted upon naming me by patronym, Odinson. He’s Borson. My grandmother taught me quite a bit of the language, too. I ended up taking Norwegian in college as an easy elective, since I already knew quite a bit. In addition to the modern language, we learned some about Nordic runes. I liked them a lot and when Luke and I were together I bought us matching bracelets with the Inguz rune on them.” He holds up his wrist to show them. “I wonder what went through his head…” 

Thor trails off, wondering if there was any truth to that day at all. Was Luke really so good an actor? He had seemed so distressed when he realized he’d forgotten their anniversary. Had he just been laughing at the British guy giving the Norwegian guy a Nordic gift? Did that count as cultural appropriation? Had he found it rude? Tacky?

Brunnhilde is looking at him thoughtfully. “Did you talk about your Norwegian roots much with Luke?”

“Not really. It’s not the kind of thing that comes up very often.”

“Wait, this could be useful,” Tony jumps in. “Think really hard. Did she ever say anything about it? Did she ever reference a specific place?”

Thor thinks for a minute. “There was one thing… I made a joke one time, saying if I ever visited Norway I should take a hammer and pretend to be the God of Thunder since I looked so much like an actor who played him in a movie we watched. Luke scoffed and said, ‘ _ Knowing you, while there you’d be stupid enough to to go to Hammer Fest, thinking it’s a festival of hammers honoring the god. Well, don’t. It’s more like a festival of shit _ .’” Thor scratches his beard. “It’s not a place, but how many many festivals named for hand tools can there be?”

“Point Break, that’s brilliant!” Tony shouts. He runs to get his computer. “I have no idea what kind of festival that would be, but hey, if it helps us find him, I’m happy. Also, I’m calling you Hammer Time from now on.” 

Tony types ‘Hammer Festival Norway” into the search bar. The first result is a Wiki page entitled ‘Hammerfest’. He clicks it. “Oh my god. Thor, Hammerfest isn’t a festival, it’s a place!” 

“What?” Thor and Brunnhilde ask in unison. 

“Yeah, it’s a municipality in Norway. Guys, that’s gotta be where he’s from!”

Brunnhilde cackles in delight. “Totally! He said it was a shit fest. Isn’t that what everyone thinks of their hometown?”

Excited, they set to researching. It turns out, there are only a little over 10,000 people that live in Hammerfest. They think it likely that there would only be one high school for such a small town. Then they Google it and find out that they don’t have high school in Norway. They have primary school, lower secondary school, and upper secondary school. Lower secondary is for kids between 12 and 16 and it’s the highest required level of schooling in Norway. They decide that’s the equivalent. Through a Wiki page that lists every school in Norway, they find that there is indeed only one lower secondary school in Hammerfest:  Breilia skole . 

“That means, if we’re correct that our Ocean’s One is Norwegian, and we’re correct that she’s from Hammerfest, she probably went to that school,” Tony says. 

“So if we can find a yearbook for the year he would have graduated, we should be able to recognize him and learn his identity,” Brunnhilde adds. 

“But how are we going to do that? It’s a small school in a small town. I doubt they have their yearbooks digitized. The only way to see them is probably in the school library.”

Tony grins. “So we fly to Hammerfest and we look in the library.”

Brunnhilde frowns at him. “How do you propose we get there? We don’t have any money.”

Tony gestures around his penthouse full of expensive fixtures. “Oh, but we do.”

They post nearly everything in Tony’s penthouse for sale online. One day later, they’ve already sold several things and have $8,132. The $132 is what was left of Tony’s grocery fund. 

The first thing they buy is more food. The second is three one way tickets to Hammerfest Airport. They figure that after they’re done in Norway, they’ll fly to wherever their search leads them next rather than returning to New York. For all they know, they could even find Luke right there in Norway. So they hold off on buying the return trip. 

They fly out two days later. Thor spends most of the time leading up to the trip brushing up on his Norwegian while Tony and Brunnhilde mastermind their cover story for getting into the school. 

They fly into Hammerfest in the early morning. The trip is long and they have several layovers, but they’re too keyed up to be tired. The first thing they do is take showers in the airport bathroom. Next, they find a map of Hammerfest in a little visitor booth. According to the map, the school is five miles from the airport. They decide to conserve money and walk. The only luggage they brought are backpacks and the weather is mild, so it’s not too unpleasant. 

Over an hour later, they’re in front of  Breilia skole. School must just be starting for the day, as the sidewalks are full of children swarming to the front doors like bees being sucked into a vacuum. Thor, Brunnhilde, and Tony slip into the throng, hoping to meld into the crowd and get inside unseen. They don’t bother removing their backpacks, figuring they will just help them blend in more. 

Once they’re surrounded by students, Thor realizes two things. One, they stick out like three sore thumbs standing head and shoulders above the sea of children. Two, three adults trying to sneak into a school looks super creepy. Tony and Brunnhilde seem to realize these things at the same time as him. They realize too late. They’re already at the front doors and a stern woman stands there glaring at them. 

The cover story Tony and Brunnhilde devised for getting into the school is that Thor is from Norway and used to attend this school as a child. Tony and Brunnhilde are his foreign friends. He’d moved away to Britain when he was quite young and hasn’t spoken much Norwegian since. This, they hope, will explain his less than fluent Norwegian and his British accent. 

The woman says something in Norwegian that Thor approximates to mean, “ _ Who the hell are you? _ ”

He responds in his own broken Norwegian, “ _ My name is Thor. I used to attend school here. _ ” She raises her eyebrow skeptically. “ _ I… moved away a while back. I haven’t gotten to speak much Norwegian since I was a kid. _ ”

She tilts her head a little, then says in English, “What brings you back home?”

Thor, relieved that he can stop piecemealing the Norwegian he knows together, says, “I just got engaged.” He takes Brunnhilde’s arm. She returns the gesture stiffly. They’d planned this as well, needing a reason for their trip that they could tell people. “I wanted my bride and my best man to see my home.”

The woman’s face softens, oh-so-close to a smile, but still wary. “And you came to the school, because…?” Thor is briefly distracted, noticing her Norwegian accent. He thinks it’s a beautiful sound. He wonders if Luke talks like that when he’s not acting. 

Then Brunnhilde’s elbow that’s folded with his own shoves sharply into his side. He winces and answers the woman’s question. “Oh, I just wanted them to see where I spent my formative years.” He thinks for half a second and adds, “And I’d hoped to find some old yearbooks to show them what I looked like as a boy.”

“That is lovely. But I’m sorry, I can’t let anyone who isn’t a student or guardian into the school.” She looks truly apologetic. Thor almost feels bad. 

Tony cuts in. “Ah man, I’d really been looking forward to that. You see, I don’t believe this guy’s claims that he’s always been Mister Stud Muffin. He must have had an ugly phase like the rest of us mere mortals at some point.”

The woman finally smiles. “It’s his Norwegian genes. We are a very attractive people, you know,” she jokes. 

Tony laughs. “I might not have believed that, were you not standing right in front of me, proving it with that smile.” The woman blushes. 

Thor can practically feel Brunnhilde rolling her eyes. He resists his own urge to groan and lets Tony work. 

“I’m serious. You’ve made this entire trip worth it already. Even if I don’t get to see this giant lump’s kid pictures, at least I got to see you.” He smiles disarmingly. 

Brunnhilde makes a disappointed “Awww”, a much daintier sound than Thor has come to expect from her. “I was really hoping to see how my big boo-bear looked as a little cub.” She looks up at Thor with an expression that he finds nearly as disturbing as being called ‘boo-bear’. 

The woman looks between the two of them with an “Awww” expression of her own and then looks at Tony with a more pronounced appreciation. She sighs. “Oh, all right. I suppose, technically, you are a student. Just not a current one.” The three of them beam at her. “We keep all the old yearbooks in the library. You can see them, but don’t go wandering the halls and freaking people out, okay?” 

They nod eagerly and she leads them inside. Most of the students have made it to their classrooms by now, leaving the halls fairly empty. They stop by the front office for visitor passes and then continue on. The library is quaint and small, but charming in its own way. She shows them the shelves of yearbooks and leaves them to it, headed to her own class. 

They scan the multiple shelves of yearbooks until they locate the ones from around the time Luke would have been there. The students at this school are between 12 and 16 years of age. Luke, Lachlan, and Elle were all between 25 and 26, so they start with the yearbook from 2008-9, when Luke would have been 16. Rather than divide and conquer, they all crowd over the same book. They scan each page carefully, not finding him. Then they move onto the 2007-8 book, getting the same result.   
“What if we don’t recognize him?” Brunnhilde asks. “I mean, he makes a living disguising himself. He could have gotten plastic surgery. Or he could have been a fat kid and gotten scrawny as an adult. Hell, we don’t even know his hair color.”

Tony hums. “Yeah, you’re right. But we don’t really have much choice but to just look really, really closely.” 

Thor privately thinks that he would recognize Luke no matter what. He knows it’s a naive, vain thought. He holds onto it anyway. 

They decide to scan back through the books they just did, to be sure they didn’t miss him. They retrieve the 2008-9 book again and scan past the rows of posed portraits. This time, they go on to look through the candid section of shots taken throughout the year. Nothing. They move onto the 2007-8 book. They do the same with this one, scanning all the rows of portraits and then the candid pictures in the back. Still nothing. Then the 2006-7 book. Portraits, candids. Nothing. They move onto the 2005-6 book. They scan through all the portraits. Nothing. Then they scan through the candids.

“Oh my god,” Tony breathes. They all stare open mouthed at the page in front of them. In the back of the book there’s a full page devoted to one large portrait. It shows a thin, pale boy with short black hair and variegated emerald eyes. In Norwegian, it reads:

_ In Memoriam of Loki Laufeyson, 1993 - 2005 _

  
  



	18. The Life and Death of Loki Laufeyson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the positive feedback on Mr. Sandman so far! I started this thinking it would just be for me, but I'm so glad that other people are enjoying it too <3 <3 <3

“Her name is Loki!”

“He’s… dead.”

Thor ignores his friends’ exclamations. He’s too busy processing what’s in front of him. He can hardly believe that they found him. They flew to Hammerfest on a meager hunch at best. And they found him.

Loki. That’s the name of his love. It doesn’t feel all that different on his tongue than Luke. And it suits him better. He’d always thought Luke was too common of a name for such a person. Loki is a peculiar name, fit for an anomalous man. 

Thor looks more closely at the picture of the 12 year old boy. It’s undoubtedly his Luke. The eyes alone would be enough to know. His features are even more delicate and sharp as a child, though. He looks frail, thin, as if a tap to his sternum would send fissures through his ribs. He’s not smiling, his eyes just look somewhere beyond the camera with an eerie blank expression. 

Thor looks at the years by the name. 2005. The people that knew him thought he’d died then, over a decade ago. It makes Thor think himself lucky for the first time in months. Because he’s lost his Luke, but he knows he is still out there. The people here think him gone from the world entire. 

He hopes to never know the feeling.

They go to the public library next. They set up at a table with their laptops and a stack of old newspapers from the library archives. Eventually, in a newspaper from 2005 they find an article with the same picture of 12 year old Loki. They find the missing person report to match online. 

Apparently Loki was last seen on October 14, 2005. He was believed to be the victim of a kidnapping and most likely a homicide, due to the large amount of his blood that was found after his disappearance. They never found the person responsible. 

“Do you think he faked his own death?” Thor asks. 

“What other explanation is there?” Tony responds. “But geez, I thought she was committed for dying her pubes. For this, she spilled enough of her own blood that they assumed she was dead.” He shivers. 

Brunnhilde clicks her tongue. “Well, I guess we know he’s got black hair now.”

Thor can’t hold back his grin at that. He’d always loved Luke’s sleek, raven hair. 

Brunnhilde rolls her eyes at his dopey expression. “Oh, shut up.”

They look in the library’s digital phone book under ‘Laufeyson’. There isn’t anyone by that name in Hammerfest. 

“Maybe he was named by patronym instead of surname, like me,” Thor says. “Try searching under the first name ‘Laufey’. 

They get a result. Laufey Ymirson. 

They walk to the address from the phone book record. It’s located on a street lined with dull, normal houses. The residence of Laufey Ymirson is a small single story with sallow yellow paint. It doesn’t seem like the kind of place that could produce a genius con man like Loki. 

As they approach, the front door opens. Without communicating to do so, they all dive behind a neighbor’s beat up red truck. A willowy woman with long brown hair walks out. She has a face drawn with premature wrinkles and sunken cheeks. Thor can imagine that he sees Loki in her slender frame, but everything else is different. He wonders if they have the right place. Could this be Loki’s mother? 

She continues on down the sidewalk, back the way Thor and the others came. They all glance at each other and follow, staying far enough back to avoid notice. She leads them to a small grocery. They linger outside as she goes inside. 

“Okay, you guys should pose as the engaged couple again,” Tony says in a hush. “Hammer Time, you can tell her you were friends with Loki before you moved to Britain at the age of 10, before Loki’s ‘death’. You only just learned of her death when you came back to visit your hometown with your spankin’ new fiancee.”

Thor nods. Brunnhilde scrunches her nose at the description of her character. 

“I’ll stay behind and be the backup,” Tony says. “If you need me to bail you out, just text me.”

Thor and Brunnhilde leave their backpacks with Tony and walk into the store. They glance around, not seeing the woman. After wandering around the store for a while, they spot her looking at the deli counter. Thor walks up and pretends to browse hams. Then he glances at her and fakes a double take. “ _ Fru Ymirson? _ ” He uses the Norwegian equivalent of Mrs.

She looks at him and raises an eyebrow. “ _ And you are? _ ” He notices she has green eyes, a shade lighter than Lu - Loki’s. 

“ _ Oh, sorry, I’m Thor. I used to go to school with Loki. _ ” The name feels both foreign and intimate on his tongue, like a swear word whispered behind the backs of school teachers. 

Her eyes widen, lips trembling. “ _ Loki? _ ”

He shifts, sobers his face. “ _ I am sorry for your loss. I only just heard of his passing. _ ”

Her glassy eyes turn suspicious. “ _ I thought you said you went to school together… You don’t sound like you’re from here. _ ”

“ _ I moved away to Britain when we were eleven.” _ Thor is actually five years older than Loki. He hopes he can get away with passing them off as the same age. “ _ This is my first time back home since then and I was not told of Loki’s passing when it happened. _ ”

The words seem to assuage her suspicions. She smiles kindly, a sadness still lingering. “ _ Welcome home. It’s lovely that you’ve returned. _ ” Thor thinks of her son that disappeared, never to return himself. 

“ _ Thank you. _ ” He remembers Brunnhilde. “ _ Oh! And this is my fiancee, Brunnhilde. I brought her over from Britain to see my home. _ ”

The woman looks to Brunnhilde. In English, she says, “My, but you are lovely. Welcome to Hammerfest. I am Farbauti Ymirson.” 

“Nice to meet you,” Brunnhilde replies. 

Farbauti turns back to Thor. “You said that you… knew Loki?”

“Yes, he was a good friend. I am sorry to hear of his passing. I had looked forward to catching up.” 

Farbauti's face looks momentarily confused, but then it turns into a wide, teary smile. “Friend? I did not know he had any. I’m glad to know he was not so alone as he let me believe.” 

Thor is unable to speak for a moment. No friends? Then he remembers himself. “Yes, we were quite close before distance came between us.”

Farbauti eagerly grabs up his hand in both of hers. “Please, you must come for lunch at my house. Tell me about how he was with you.”

Thor and Brunnhilde exchange a look. Jackpot. 

The three of them walk back to the house where they first spotted Farbauti. A part of Thor feels guilty for taking advantage of this woman’s grief. A bigger part of him knows that he needs to find Loki. 

Thor notices Tony following discreetly behind them, still playing backup. He wonders if the man just wanted to avoid the awkwardness of comforting a mourning mother. Then they’re walking into the house, leaving Tony somewhere outside. 

Inside the house is just as dull as the exterior. The hall they enter into is a light grey. The floorboards are old and worn. The glass light fixtures cast cobwebs and floating dust into sharp relief. The sitting room she leads them to is sparsely furnished with fraying furniture desperately in need of reupholstering. 

The only interesting feature in the room is the shockingly large man taking up nearly half of it. His shoulders are wider than the chair he sits in. His legs hang out into the middle of the floor. He is built thick, like a giant from a fairytale. His hair is pitch black and cut close to his skull. His skin is so translucent that a map of blue veins can be seen beneath. 

This must be Laufey, Loki’s father. 

  
  



	19. Friends and Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be some exciting developments next chapter.... xD

“_ Who are they? _” Laufey glares at Farbauti when he asks, remaining seated. 

“_ This is Thor and his fiancee, Brunnhilde. _” She gestures to each of them in turn. “Thor, Brunnhilde, this is my husband and Loki’s father, Laufey.” She looks at Brunnhilde apologetically. “I’m sorry, dear, he doesn’t know English.” 

“_ What do they want? _” Laufey interjects.

“_ Thor here was a friend of Loki’s. _”

Laufey turns his glare on Thor. “_ That runt didn’t have any friends. _” The words are spat out like a piece of rotten fruit. 

Thor is taken aback. That’s how he speaks of his dead son? Thor restrains his instinct to hurl insults back at the man. He glances at Brunnhilde, hoping she’ll have a response that doesn’t involve shouting. Then he remembers that she doesn’t understand Norwegian. It’s on him then. 

He takes a deep, calming breath. “_ Loki was very important to me, _ ” he says honestly, some need to defend sparked by Laufey’s words. “ _ Losing his friendship when I moved to Britain as a child was difficult. I missed him greatly. I still do. _” The words are just a little too close to the truth, bringing genuine wetness to his eyes. He’s glad Brunnhilde can’t understand what he’s saying when she looks at him askance. 

Farbauti looks simultaneously heartbroken and full of awe at Thor’s words. Laufey continues glaring. “_ So you want to reminisce with us, is that it? _” He deadpans.

Thor really hates this man. No wonder Loki left. But Thor is here for a purpose. He shifts from foot to foot, cringing at what he’s about to say. “_ Actually, I was quite shocked to learn the circumstances of Loki’s… disappearance. I was hoping you might be able to tell me more of what exactly happened. _ ” He tacks on, “ _ For closure. _”

Laufey growls. “_ You know not what your snooping would unleash. Go now, while I still allow it. _”

Thor resists the urge to growl back. He’s never taken well to taunts. 

Farbauti looks distressed. “_ Laufey, he just-- _”

“_ Enough. Go! _” Laufey stands to his full height. He’s even more towering than Thor thought. Brunnhilde and he both take a step away from the giant. 

Farbauti tugs weakly at Thor’s arm, pulling him back toward the entrance. “I’m sorry, I think you’d better go.” They begin following her back toward the front door. The booming voice follows them. 

“_ Run back home, little princess. _” 

Thor is turning back with a growl before he knows it. Brunnhilde grabs his arm with forceful authority, making him halt and remember their reason for being here. With a huff, he follows the two women back toward the door without looking at Laufey again. 

When they’re over the threshold, Farbauti says, “I’m sorry. He has become old and untrusting.” She looks meaningfully into Thor’s eyes. “But thank you. For bringing a piece of Loki back to Norway with you.” 

He is momentarily distracted by her words, but tucks them away to speak to Brunnhilde and Tony about later. He gives Farbauti a genuine smile. “Thank you for giving a piece of him back to me as well.”

They turn to leave, but Farbauti stops them again. “Helbindi, one of Loki’s older brothers. He lives in Oslo. If you plan to be down that way, I’m sure he would love to meet a friend of Loki’s.” Her words carry just a little more than simple suggestion with them. Thor tucks that away along with her previous words. 

“Could I get his address?” 

As they walk back down the street, Tony appears, stepping out of a shrub with such swagger that you’d think it was a ferrari. “So, what’d we learn?”

Thor and Brunnhilde both glare at him. 

“What?” Tony asks. 

Thor rolls his eyes, but decides to drop it. He has something more pressing to talk to them about than Tony’s apparent fear of frail old women. “I think they know something.”

Brunnhilde and Tony both look at him in shock. Thor keeps forgetting that Brunnhilde can’t understand any Norwegian, so she’s almost as out of the loop as Tony. “Really? What did that old man say?” 

“When I started pressing for information on Loki’s disappearance, Laufey got real defensive and told me that I didn’t know 'what my snooping would unleash'. He used weird formal words, so I might not have understood exactly correctly. But that doesn’t sound like a parent who doesn’t know anything about what happened to their child, does it? It sounds like someone with something to hide.”

“Yeah you’re right,” Brunnhilde agrees. “And Farbauti said that weird thing about you bringing a piece of Loki back to Norway. It was as if she knew that he had left Norway, rather than died here.”

“I noticed that too. And the way she told us to visit Loki’s brother. I got the feeling she thought he might give us the information on Loki’s disappearance that Laufey wouldn’t.”

“Wait, what?” Tony exclaims. 

Thor backs up and explains the entirety of what Tony missed. 

They end up agreeing that their best, and only, course of action is to pay a visit to Helbindi, Loki’s brother. It takes them a train, a bus, and a ferry to get to Oslo. They sleep while in transport and take perfunctory sink baths to avoid the cost of lodging. When they arrive, they take yet another bus to get to the address Farbauti gave them. 

The house is nicer than Farbauti and Laufey’s. It’s a tall two story brick house with a large porch in a pleasant neighborhood with lots of trees and well kept lawns. 

“Okay, so you two play the engaged couple and I--”

“Oh, you’re not getting out of it this time,” Brunnhilde scolds. 

“Yeah, we’re supposed to be a team here,” Thor agrees. “You can’t make us do all the work.”

“Excuse me? All the work? Who is it that’s come up with most of our ideas? Me! If it weren’t for me, you guys wouldn’t have even gotten this far. Besides, it makes sense to have a person stay back. If you think he seems as suspicious as the creepy old couple, then I’ll sneak in and ‘snoop’, as Laufey so poetically put it.”

Thor and Brunnhilde consider that. Thor has to admit that Tony is correct that his help has been invaluable. He even sold all of his possessions to get them here. They concede and let him stay back, leaving their backpacks with him once more. 

The fake couple ascends the stairs up to the porch and knock on the large oak door. A few moments later, it opens to reveal a man who rivals Laufey in size. He must be at least 6’7”, his shoulders nearly filling the wide door frame. He has cropped black hair, like Laufey’s, and pale green eyes, like Farbauti. There’s something of Loki in his high cheekbones and sharp chin.

“_ Yes? _” Helblindi asks pleasantly.

Thor clears his throat, suddenly aware of how odd it is to show up at a stranger’s house wanting to talk about their dead brother. “_ Hi. I’m Thor and this is Brunnhilde. Farbauti gave us your address. _”

Helbindi looks perplexed at that. “_ My mother? Why? Is something wrong? _”

“_ No, no. We’re visiting from Britain, but I grew up in Hammerfest. We ran into Farbauti during our stay there and got talking. _ ” He takes a breath. “ _ Before I moved away, I was friends with Loki. _”

Helbinidi’s face goes completely blank. He looks between the two of them, assessing. Finally, he replies, “_ I didn’t know Loki had any friends. _” The words are said warily, but Thor can hear the same hope that had been in Farbauti’s voice when Thor had called Loki a friend. It makes him sad. Loki’s father clearly didn’t care for him and to know that he was also without any friends makes Loki’s childhood look rather bleak. 

The sadness in Thor’s voice doesn’t have to be faked. “_ I considered him a close friend. Unfortunately, I moved away when we were eleven. We lost touch. I only just learned of his passing. _” 

Helbindi still looks wary, but his shoulders relax somewhat. “_ And why did my mother send you here? _”

“_ I think she thought it might be nice for both of us to have someone to talk to about Loki. _”

Helbindi’s eyes go soft. “_ You miss him. _” 

“_ Yes. _” Thor can see that the same is true of Helbindi. Like Farbauti, mention of Loki seems to make him turn gentler, sadder. Thor wonders if Helbindi can see the same thing in his eyes. 

Helblindi looks at Brunnhilde. “_ She doesn’t say much. _”

Thor puts his arm around her waist, feels her stiffen with the instinct to punch him for it. “_ This is my fiancee, from Britain. She doesn’t speak Norwegian. As you can probably tell, I haven’t spoken it much in a long time myself. _” He laughs self deprecatingly. 

“Oh, why didn’t you say so? Most people in Norway speak English. You need only ask.” He smiles warmly at Brunnhilde, ignoring Thor’s comment on his own shotty Norwegian. 

She smiles back and shakes his hand. 

“Why don’t you two come in?”

  
  



	20. If He Were Alive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like this chapter :3

They follow Helbindi through the house to a large sitting room with wide glass doors opening to a view of the trees in the backyard. Thor and Brunnhilde sit on the couch, just close enough as to not look like they’re having relationship problems, and Helbindi takes a broad armchair across from them. It’s suddenly painfully awkward. 

Helbindi clears his throat. “So… you knew Loki.” 

“Yes.” Thor says. He doesn’t know how to continue. 

Brunnhilde comes to his rescue. Thor is so glad Helbindi speaks English. “Thor always spoke highly of his friend Loki. I know moving away to Britain was hard for him. He always talked about reconnecting with him again one day.” 

Helbindi looks at them intently. “I’m surprised Loki never mentioned you. Since you were so close and all.” It’s not quite accusing, but it’s not quite friendly either. 

Thor, sweating, replies, “Oh, you know Loki. He was always kind of mysterious.” He hopes he’s not terribly far off the mark. It’s hard for him to imagine that someone who faked their own death at age 12 wouldn’t be, though. 

Helbindi snorts a laugh. “Yeah, I suppose that’s true. Although I think I would’ve used the word ‘conniving’.”

Thor laughs too, but it’s strained. That sounds like a wretchedly apt description for Luke too.

“Were you and Loki close?” Brunnhilde asks.

Helbindi smiles. “We were. As close as a person could be to Loki, anyway.”

What do you mean?” she asks. 

“He was just the sort of person it seemed like you could never really know. His mind always seemed to be in an entirely different realm than everyone else.”

“I know what you mean,” Thor says. He means it. That sounds just like his Luke. He takes a chance. “I could never predict him. He would make connections between things that made no sense to anyone else. Sometimes, I thought he was a genius. Other times, I found myself questioning his sanity. Or mine,” he laughs. 

Helbindi laughs too. He seems to have relaxed. “I guess you really did know him. I couldn’t have described him better myself.”

Thor can feel Brunnhilde looking at him. He doesn’t look back. “Did he do that thing with you where he would give you a compliment, but disguise it as an insult so you wouldn’t notice?”

“All the time!” Helbindi is grinning with his whole face now. “He would do that with people’s nicknames. The nastier the nickname, the more he liked you. God help the person he called something nice!”

“Yes! He always called me ‘Oaf’. I liked to think of it as a pet name.” Brunnhilde looks at him sharply. He realizes his slip. ‘Pet name’ isn’t generally something childhood friends use for each other. Hopefully Helbindi doesn’t notice.

“He must have thought highly of you,” the large man laughs. “I was always ‘Ogre’.” He says the name with a large amount of nostalgia. 

Brunnhilde looks baffled. “Loki sounds… eccentric.” Thor and Helbindi both just laugh loudly at that. She looks back and forth between them. “Excuse me. I need the restroom,” she says abruptly. Helbindi points her in the right direction. 

After she leaves, Helbindi turns to Thor with a small smile full of melancholic understanding. “ _ You loved him didn’t you? _ ” he says in Norwegian.

Thor panics. “What? No, I - he was a good friend--”

“It’s okay. I’m glad I wasn’t the only one who did.” 

Thor pauses, sobers. “He really had no one else?”

Helbindi shakes his head, looks down. “Our father is a harsh, cold man. Our older brother, Bylster, is much like him. Neither of them got along with Loki. And our mother… well, I think she loved him in her way. But she never seemed to really accept him. I think his… death was perhaps when she finally did. Too late.” He looks up at Thor. “Aside from maybe me, he never let anyone in, never let anyone really see him. It’s good to know there was an exception.”

Thor smiles, his eyes wet. His voice feels choked. “I am glad to have been the exception.” He allows a small part of himself, deeply buried, to hope it’s actually true. 

“I am sure you were good for him.” Helblindi looks at him with conflicted eyes. “He needs someone like that in his life. I wish--”

Brunnhilde walks back into the room then and Helbindi snaps his mouth shut. Thor doesn’t miss his switch to present tense. 

“What did I miss?’ Brunnhilde asks.

As Brunnhilde and Helbindi chat a bit, Thor pulls out his phone and texts Tony.  _ I think he might know something. Can you get in and search?  _

Tony’s reply is almost immediate.  _ Yes. Keep his eyes away from the door.  _

Thor joins in on their chat half-heartedly while watching the front door, at the other end of the hall from where they sit. Luckily, Helbindi has his back to it. As Brunnhilde tells Helbindi about her fake job, Thor sees the door slowly creek open. He coughs loudly to cover any sound it might make. Then Tony is slipping inside while Brunnhilde pounds Thor on the back. 

Thor feels the moment Brunnhilde notices Tony. He grips her arm and jerks his eyes toward Helbindi, a silent signal to keep him occupied. He watches from the corner of his eye as Tony slowly slips up the, thankfully silent, stairs. Then he’s out of sight and Thor has to place his trust in Tony. He turns his attention fully back to the conversation. 

“--and when Thor said that we should visit Norway before getting married, I was immediately excited. I had always wanted to meet this ‘Loki’ he couldn’t shut up about. Of course, then we learned…” She lets the sentence trail off, a silent euphemism. 

Helbindi gives Thor a sad look. “That must have been tough. To find out in such a way.”

Thor clears his throat, trying to get his thoughts away from Tony upstairs. “Yes, it was a shock. Especially so due to the circumstances of his… death”

Helbindi gives him a long look. “Yes. It was horrible.”

“What exactly happened?” Brunnhilde asks. “No one’s told us anything really, just that he disappeared.” Thor notes how she strategically leaves out the bit where they spent hours researching it.

Helbindi looks between the two of them. “Why do you want to know?

“He was my friend,” Thor says heavily. “I need to know.”

Helbindi watches him for a moment and then gives a short nod. He turns his gaze to the floor. “It happened right after our father’s company, Jotunheim, was broken into.” Thor and Brunnhilde share a wide eyed look. “It was never made public information, but we think the same person took Loki.”

“Why would you think that?” Brunnhilde asks.

“Because he disappeared on the same day as the break in.” 

That sounds terribly familiar to Thor. He’d thought Luke had been kidnapped when he disappeared on the same day as the break in at Asgard. 

“And,” Helbindi takes a breath, “and they killed him. Two days after he disappeared, his clothes and ID were found in a hotel room along with blood. A lot of blood. It matched Loki’s DNA.” He shakes his head. “14 years after his death, I still can’t get over it.”

“But you don’t know for sure that he’s dead, do you?” Brunnhilde cuts in. Thor pales. Oh she wouldn’t. Would she? “He just disappeared. There was blood, yeah, but you can survive a lot of blood loss.” Apparently she would. “What if he’s still out there somewh--”

“He’s dead.” Helbindi says it with such forcefull finality that Brunnhilde clicks her mouth shut. “There was too much blood and he hasn’t been seen in 14 years. Leave it.”

Thor attempts damage control. “I’m sorry, she didn’t mean to be insensitive. We only just learned of this and it’s still sinking in.” 

Helbindi’s wariness is back tenfold. He looks back and forth between them with narrowed, suspicious eyes. “Yes, well, he was declared dead. 14 years ago. He’s dead. There’s noone to find.”

The words only increase Thor’s suspicions that Helbindi knows more than he says. Just then, he spots Tony tiptoeing back down the stairs. He glances over at Thor with wide, manic eyes and throws him a thumbs up. Thor quickly looks back to Helbindi as Tony slips out the door. 

“Yes. You’re right,” Thor says to him. “Brunnhilde was just trying to make this easier on me. She doesn’t actually think he’s alive. Do you honey?” He turns to Brunnhilde with a sugar sweet smile.

“No,” she says tightly. “I’m sorry. That was insensitive of me. It’s just so sad that he’s gone.”

Thor’s phone pings. It’s Tony.  _ Holy shit dude.  _

Helbindi sighs. “It’s fine. Loki’s just kind of a sensitive topic for me.”

Thor’s phone pings again.  _ Jackpot! _

He elbows Brunnhilde. She looks at the phone, then looks sharply up at Thor.

“Something important?” Helbindi asks, nodding toward the phone.

“Yes, sorry. We forgot about another appointment we need to get to.” Brunnhilde says apologetically. “It’s been wonderful meeting you, though.”

“It’s been my pleasure. I’m sorry that your first trip to Norway was ruined by such dour news, but I’m glad it brought you to my door.” 

“Likewise.” 

He turns to Thor. “Thor. What I asked earlier.” He looks at him meaningfully. “Do you still?”

Thor doesn’t hesitate to answer, “More than anything.”

Helbindi seems to search for something in Thor’s eyes. Then he nods, as if to himself. “Loki is dead,” he starts, “but if he were alive… I think you are exactly what he would need.”

Thor stares into Helbindi’s eyes, searching for something himself. “And he is exactly what I would need.” He says the words somberly, his eyes saying something else. “If… he was alive.”

Helbindi gives another sharp nod, more to himself than to Thor. He holds out his hand.

Thor takes it and they shake, a manly goodbye. “Thank you. Truly.”

Helbindi smiles back at him. “No, thank you. It’s been a long time since I’ve gotten to talk about Loki.” He grasps Thor’s hand with both of his. He slips something into his palm discreetly. Thor gets the hint and pockets it before Brunnhilde can notice. 

Helbindi sees them out and they say final goodbyes before he closes the door and they’re walking briskly down the sidewalk. 

“What the fuck was that?” Brunnhilde hisses.

“What?” Thor says innocently.

“The whole silent conversation with your eyes thing. You were freaking me out.”

Thor shrugs. “I think he knows that Loki’s alive.”  _ And he knows that I know it too _ , he doesn’t say aloud. 

“What--” 

“Oh my fuck, you guys! I got something!” Tony pops out of a patch of ornamental grass this time. 

“What?” They ask in eager unison, previous conversation forgotten. 

“Under his bed he had this picture album. The front cover had a picture of little kid Loki. But inside there weren’t any photographs.”

“Well what good does that do us? Brunnhilde asks. 

“There was something else inside.” He pauses dramatically. 

“Well, what was it?” Thor asks, exasperated and impatient. 

“Blank postcards.”

“What?” 

“A whole bunch of blank postcards, with nothing but Helbindi’s address on them.” 

“But what does that mean?” Brunnhilde asks. 

“Each one was from a different city. Three of the most recent were New York, then Liverpool, then London.”

“Where each of us are from.” Thor is starting to see where this is going. 

“Yes. The timelines match up. Loki was with me in New York, then with you Brunnhilde, in Liverpool, and then with you Thor, in London. The postcards were in that same order. Well, after at least a couple dozen others.”

“So Loki is sending him postcards from every city he goes to,” Brunnhilde says. 

“He knows Loki’s alive!” Thor exclaims. He was right. 

“But that’s not the best part.” Another dramatic pause from Tony. “London wasn’t the last postcard in the album.” 

“That means he’s already sent Helbindi a postcard from his current city.” Brunnhilde’s eyes are the widest Thor has ever seen them. 

“Where was it from?” Thor asks, vibrating with excitement and something else.

“Miami.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooooh shit guys


	21. Insecurity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki's voice returns!

Thor has to admit that Tony was right. It was a good idea to have someone hang back to sneak in and snoop. Tony’s discovery is what has finally led them to their ultimate goal: Loki’s location.

“Wait. Miami’s kind of big,” Thor realizes. “How are we going to find him there?”

“Yeah, we have no idea who his new mark is,” Brunnhilde agrees. “It’s not like we can just stalk every wealthy person in Miami to find him.”

“We’ll figure that out later,” Tony waves off their concerns. “For now, let’s celebrate! I think we’ve earned a drink.”

They end up at a small, dirty establishment full of old men with beer guts. After grabbing their own beers at the bar, they find a table in the quietest part of the room. 

Tony takes a deep swig of his stout and slams it down. “I gotta say, guys, I’m proud of us. We’ve tracked our Ocean’s One across the damn globe and back.” 

“I’ll drink to that.” Brunnhilde chugs half of her IPA in one go. 

Thor forces a grin and takes a drink of his own ale. He can’t seem to feel the same excitement as his two companions. He’s in awe that they’ve actually gotten this far, but any excitement is being drowned out by a hundred other things. 

His conversation with Helbindi, in particular, is weighing on him. Everything he’d said about Loki’s personality sounded exactly like Thor’s Luke. It’s confusing. What does it mean? Was the mask that Thor had seen in the beginning of their relationship the Luke facade? Was the man that he actually got to know once the mask cracked the real Loki? 

But if so, why? Why would he let Thor see that? With both Brunnhilde and Tony he kept up very thorough fake personalities that were outrageously different to what Helbindi described of the real Loki. Maybe it was just all part of the act. Maybe the man Thor knew was just a fake personality that happened to resemble the real Loki a little bit. But then, why had he started off differently? Was that part of the act too? Making Thor just think he was letting him in, past the mask? Or could it be possible that he really--

“Hammer Time, buddy! You gotta stop brooding. This is a time for celebration. We’re fucking heroes!”

Brunnhilde curls her lip. “Heroes? Really Tony?” 

“Hell yeah, heroes. We’re vigilantes tracking down a devious con artist. What else would you call us?” 

“Heartbroken fools with a bone to pick?” 

Thor finally gives a genuine laugh at his partners’ antics. “I think I’m with Brunnhilde on this one. Heroes wouldn’t be going outside of the law because they were blackmailed for possessing illegal objects.” 

Tony scratches his goatee. “Maybe we’re like anti-heroes. But anyway, tell me all about it. What was big brother like? Other than being big enough to make Hammer Time here look small.” 

They tell Tony about their conversation with Helbindi. Thor and Brunnhilde talk over each other and Tony interrupts with questions every other word. It takes a while.

“And he said that Loki disappeared the same day that Laufey’s company was broken into. They think the same person kidnapped and murdered him.”

“Wait, Laufey has a company?” 

They Google it and find out that Laufey Ymirson was the founder of a successful meat packing company called Jotunheim. In 2005 they went bankrupt and closed. The same year that Loki disappeared and Jotunheim was broken into. 

“Shit. Do you think Loki’s first victim was her own father?” Tony asks.

“That’s what it looks like,” Brunnhilde replies. “He disappeared the same day as the break in, just like he did with each of us. Only, instead of leaving a video blackmailing him, he left a puddle of blood and faked his death.”

“You think he would do that to his own father?” Thor aks. 

“You’re the one who talked to the old man. You tell me.” Thor has to admit Brunnhilde has a point. Laufey was pretty wretched. 

“Do you think Laufey had some illegal technology too? Maybe that’s how Loki got the idea to find other people with such things. Maybe she thinks that she’s the vigilante, not the villain?” Tony looks hopeful.

Thor considers that. “I guess that’s possible. Maybe he was upset when he learned that his father’s company was successful due to illegal means? I know I was when I learned the same of my father.”

Brunnhilde scowls at them. “That doesn’t excuse what he did to us.”

Tony’s face falls into something small and sad. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” 

Thor can’t disagree with them. But it does give him hope that maybe Loki might not be beyond saving. From what, Thor doesn’t know. Perhaps from Loki himself. 

They check into a single room at a cheap motel to save money. When it’s Thor’s turn in the bathroom, he is alone for the first time in days. He breathes a deep sigh. He’s not an introverted man, but such constant exposure to the two very large personalities of his companions’ is enough to drain even him. Not to mention they haven’t slept in a proper bed in a few days now.

His mind turns to the item that Helbindi slipped into his hand as they said goodbye. He hasn’t had a moment to himself to look at it yet. He puts his hand into his pocket and draws out the long chain. At the end of it is a ring. Thor vaguely remembers seeing the chain peeking out from beneath Helbindi’s collar. He must have removed it from his own neck to give to Thor. The thought is surprisingly touching.

He looks closer at the ring. It’s small, as if for a young child. He wonders if it was Loki’s. There are snakes engraved into the gold surface, wrapping around each other in an intricate pattern. It looks old, worn. Thor has no idea what it means. 

He sighs, pocketing it again. As he brushes his teeth, he thinks back over the day. They are closer than he ever truly believed they would get to finding their collective ex spouse. They’ve come so far and learned so much that he has no doubt left that they will find Loki. Before, it had seemed impossible. Now, it feels inevitable. 

Thor strips and gets in the shower. He pushes his face under the scalding water, running his hands through his spiky, shorn locks. He washes over his chest and stomach, feeling the softness that now pads his muscles, the result of his month of mourning for his husband. He pauses in his washing, looking down to examine himself. 

Thor has never been a self conscious man. In school he was a jock with perfect abs and zero celulite. Even when he’d begun working in an office and his large appetite had caught up with his waistline, he’d still had more muscle than fat. And he never lacked for interested bed partners, so his confidence hadn’t really receded much. That confidence had only grown when he met Luke, who had always thought Thor beautiful, regardless of how much weight he was carrying. 

But what if that was just all a part of the act? Maybe Loki always thought Thor’s extra fat was gross. Thor is suddenly worried that when Loki meets him again he will see Thor’s weight gain and think him ugly and pathetic. For the first time in his life, he is wretchedly insecure. 

*******

Loki buries his face in a pool of hair that smells like sunshine. He caresses a generous thigh, relishes in the impressive thickness. Huge arms envelope him from behind, both strong and soft. He feels protected, comforted, safe. And unbelievably horny. Luckily, one of the large hands trails down to his hardness, stroking firmly. He moans. 

Then a sharp elbow digs into his own fatless ribs. Ow. Since when were those elbows so bony? They should be soft and-- Oh. Right. He opens his eyes and looks behind him, at En Dwi. The lean, lanky man is stretched out along Loki’s back, smirking.   
“Mm, Pet, that must have been some, ah, dream you were having. Thought I’d give you, a, uh, a hand.” Loki cringes at the thought of the sleazy man touching him in his sleep. Then cringes again at his own weakness. His subconscious keeps betraying him.

He has to stop thinking about Thor. 

  
  



	22. PTSD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See bottom of chapter for warnings

Loki releases a puff of breath as a knock reverberates through the geometric office. Finally.

“Ah, yes, yes, come in!” En Dwi shouts toward the door. 

Loki repositions his legs on the yellow leather couch on which he lounges and sweeps his hair over his shoulders to display his hot pink earbuds. 

The door opens to reveal just the man Loki wants to see. Or, more aptly, hear. 

“Mr. Gast. Is now a good time?”

“Oh, absolutely not. But whenever is a good time? Perhaps a party. Mm, yes that sounds like a good time. But enough chatter. It may not be a good time, but it’s a perfect time for a report. You were supposed to give one sometime today, weren’t you? What about now? Is this a good time?” 

There’s a long, awkward silence. “Uh, I,” Bruce clears his throat. “I mean, uh, yes.” 

“Good. Excellent. Splendid. Sit.” 

There’s a shuffle as Bruce makes to comply. 

“So, Bruce. Brucey.” The desk squeeks as En Dwi surely leans forward to steeple his fingers. “Begin.”

“Um, the subject of my report is top secret to just you and me. Or, uh, so you said.”

“Mm, yes, good. Quite,” En Dwi affirms.

“Well, is it really a good idea for him to be here then?” Loki assumes Bruce is pointing to him. 

“Don’t mind him,” En Dwi dismisses. “He doesn’t understand a word of this, ah, stuff. He’s just there to look pretty. Think of him as part of the, uh, the decor.”

Bruce must still be wary, as this is only met with silence. 

En Dwi sighs. “Besides, he’s pumping that godawful music into his ears. He can’t hear a word we’re saying. Watch. AAAAAAAAAH!”

Loki delicately removes an earbud and turns to look at the other two. “Did you say something?”

En Dwi smiles widely at Bruce. “See?” He flicks a hand in Loki’s direction. “Go back to painting your nails, Pet.”

Loki puts his silent earbud back in and returns to painting his toenails a garish neon blue. He hides his triumphant smirk behind his hair as Bruce begins his top secret report. 

*******

Thor wakes up sandwiched between Tony and Brunnhilde. Their motel room only has one bed and no couch, so they decided to share. He’s regretting being in the middle now that he needs to pee. Attempting to get up without waking his partners, he slowly extricates his limbs and reaches a leg over Tony. But he misjudges the distance and ends up kneeling on the smaller man’s hand. 

“Yeouch!” Tony squacks and flails up in bed, upending Thor to land heavily on Brunnhilde. She jerks under him and starts screaming, a fearful, distressed sound. Panicked, Thor scrambles off of her. She throws her arms over her head and kicks out at him. 

Thor and Tony share a look of panic and then they both work together to grab her fiercely kicking legs and pin her to the bed. “Brunhilde! Hey! Calm down, it’s Thor and Tony.” They get her hands away from her face and find her eyes wild and glassy, staring straight through them. It’s exactly how Luke’s eyes had looked that time that he tried to strangle Thor.

Remembering what had helped that time with Luke, or Loki, Thor revokes his hold on Brunnhilde’s limbs and then grabs Tony to get him off of her as well. “Stop, we’re making it worse!” As soon as she’s free, Brunnhilde tackles Thor. He lets himself fall back on the bed belly up, like a dog surrendering. Tony follows his lead and stays back.

Brunnhilde has her arm up against Thor’s throat, pinning him in place. She’s panting heavily and staring through him. Thor takes a chance and reaches up to rub her arm lightly, soothingly. “Hey, it’s Thor. Your friend. No one’s going to hurt you.” 

After a few minutes, she seems to calm down, her eyes focusing, and moves back from him. She collapses back onto the bed. 

Tony moves to sit closer to her. “Hey, you good?”

She grimaces and sits up. “Yeah. Sorry. PTSD.” 

Tony nods in understanding, but Thor is confused. He sort of knows what PTSD is, something related to war veterans and trauma, but not enough to understand what just happened. “Something like that happened happened with Luke once. He attacked me and stared through me just like that. Like he was seeing something that wasn’t there.”

Brunnhilde gives an absent nod, still calming down. “Yeah, Lachlan too. Said he was a war vet, like me. Fucking liar.”

Thor frowns. “But Luke wasn’t a veteran.” 

“You can get PTSD from other traumatic events, not just war,” Tony says. 

“But there weren’t any other traumatic experiences in his story with me. Are we sure it was an act? There was no reason for him to pretend to have PTSD with me.”

“Unless Loki was trying to gain your sympathy,” Tony points out.

Thor is unconvinced, but decides to drop it. “Well, sorry about triggering an episode,” he says, “but now that we’re all up, how about some breakfast?”

They end up at a diner down the street from their motel. It’s done up to look like a viking cabin. For the tourists, Thor imagines. They all order large platters of food to refuel after the busy few days they’ve had. 

“So, now that we’ve celebrated, slept, and have food,” Tony takes a big bite of eggs and continues to talk through them, “how are we gonna find Loki once we get to Miami?” They’d bought three plane tickets the night before, using up much of their remaining money. 

Brunnhilde takes an even bigger bite than Tony and makes even less of an attempt to conceal her half masticated food as she talks. “Well, I guess we need to find a person with illegal technology helping out their business.”

Thor, never one to be shown up, takes an even bigger bite than either of them, thanks to the sheer size of his mouth, and says, “They’d probably be pretty successful. I mean, Asgard is the biggest advertising company in the market.”

Tony perks up. “And Stark Industries was the biggest weapons manufacturer in the world.” 

They both turn to Brunnhilde expectantly. She blinks, wide eyed. “Yeah, Valkyrie Industries, before Lachlan stole the Aether, was the biggest production company in the business.”

Three forks clatter onto the table. “That’s it!” Tony shouts. Half of the other guests in the diner shush him and he lowers his voice. “We just need to find a company in Miami that’s the top of its field.” He grabs his computer out of his backpack, eggs forgotten. Thor and Brunnhilde watch, rapt, as he types at a blinding speed. Then he’s twirling his computer around to face them. “These are all of the top companies in Miami. But there’s one that stands head and shoulders above the rest, regardless of their field.” 

They lean forward to look at the screen. _ Sakaar Technologies. _

Thor squints at the name. “So you think this is where we’ll find him?”

“Hell yeah. Nothing but the best for our Ocean’s One.” Tony grins.

“So, if you’re right, how do we figure out who within the company he’s conning?”

Tony spins the computer back to face himself and starts typing again. “I say we camp out in front of Sakaar’s front doors and wait for one of these people to show up.” He spins the computer back toward Thor and Brunnhilde. It shows pictures and names of each of the top execs that work for Sakaar. 

“Wow, Tony. I’m actually impressed.” Brunnhilde smirks. “You’re skills are well suited to conning people. Sure you’re on the right team?” 

Tony sobers. “Yes. Elle, Loki, whatever, she abandoned me. She tricked me. You guys have stuck with me and brought me out of my pit of depression. I’m on the right team.”

Thor is touched. Brunnhilde scoffs, but she’s smiling too.

On the plane to Miami, Thor thinks again about the PTSD episode. Is that what had happened with Loki when Thor touched his neck that first time? Or was it really just an act? It had felt so scary, so real. Even before he knew to call it a PTSD episode, he’d suspected that maybe something had happened to Luke’s neck in the past. And Thor can’t think of a single reason why Loki would have faked that. It didn’t fit in with any other part of Luke’s narrative.

That thought has Thor worried for an entirely different reason. If the PTSD episode doesn’t fit in with the rest of what Thor knew about his husband and the PTSD episode was real, does that mean that everything else was the lie?

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PTSD episode - if this could be triggering for you, skipping everything after the chapter divider might be best. 
> 
> I have had up close and personal experience with PTSD and what I've written is based off of that. However, I realize that everyone's experiences of it are different and I in no way am writing this to say that all PTSD episodes look like this.


	23. Stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ooooh shit y'all...

After landing in Miami around 1:00AM, they check into the cheapest motel they can find, use the washing machine for their meager wardrobes, crash for the last few hours until dawn, and then leave their bags in the room and set out to begin their search. 

They take a cab to Sakaar. It’s a huge skyscraper, completely covered in blue-reflective windows. 

“Ah, it reminds me of Stark Tower. I miss my tower,” Tony pouts as he gazes wistfully up.

Thor and Brunnhilde exchange eye rolls. “It looks like a ridiculous display of wealth, to me,” she says. Tony sends her a stink eye.

“So how are we going to do this?” Thor asks. “Just stand at the front door and wait for one of Sakaar’s execs or Loki to appear?” He thinks he does an admirable job of hiding his nerves. Now that they're this close, it finally feels real and the thought of seeing Loki again has his insides tied up in celtic knots. 

Tony swallows, suddenly looking like he’s about to puke. Brunnhilde’s teeth are set and her hands are shaking. Thor reminds himself he isn’t the only one in this situation. They are all in love with a version of Loki. They were all married to Loki. They were all betrayed by Loki. 

Thor looks around them. He spots a coffee shop situated directly across the street from Sakaar. “How about we camp out in there? We can watch the door for any potential marks. If we see one, we can follow them. Hopefully they’ll lead us to - to Loki.” 

The others nod and they walk across the street to the coffee shop. They order muffins and coffees and then settle into a window booth that gives them a perfect view of Sakaar’s front door.

Five hours later, they’re still sitting in the same booth, watching out the window for any sign of Sakaar’s higher ups. 

Tony slumps down with an explosive sigh. “Guys, we knew this was a long shot. We should probably just--” he cuts off, seemingly staring at Thor’s right pec with a look somewhere between horror and awe. 

“Tony, what--?” 

“Sshhh,” Tony shushes him

Disturbed at having his chest ogled, Thor is considering slapping him when a voice he knows all too well seems to rise to the surface of the coffee shop’s bustle.

“--with whipped cream, blue sprinkles, and strawberry syrup. And an extra large black coffee.”

After a second of his own blank staring at Tony’s ear, Thor turns around slowly, vaguely registering Tony and Brunnhilde doing the same. There, at the counter ordering, is Luke. Or Loki. Whatever. 

They all gape for long minutes, stunned into inaction, as Loki completes his order and thanks the girl. His order is ready with a frankly shocking speed, to the obvious chagrin of the people who ordered before him. 

Loki looks beautiful. He looks like Luke, and it hurts. Tears sting the corners of Thor’s eyes and he blinks rapidly so that they won’t disturb the vision of his husband standing just 20 feet from him. He vaguely registers Loki’s new American accent, no longer Luke’s posh British one.

Thor realizes somewhere in his mind that he should probably be doing something. Perhaps he should whistle. But then it’s too late because Loki has turned around, holding two large cups, and is staring straight at Thor. 

For a moment, it’s like a showdown between a bunch of deer caught in each other’s headlights. Then everyone is moving. Loki is bolting for the door, Brunnhilde is chasing after him, Tony is trying to clamber over the table, and Thor is jumping over the back of the booth. 

They chase him for blocks. Thor already knows that Loki is faster than him from their past workouts, but Brunnhilde is faster still. She finally snags Loki by the back of his shirt and slams him into the nearest wall. The other people on the sidewalk skirt around the scene, seemingly unbothered. Thor comes to a stop beside them, chest heaving. 

Inanely, he focuses on the two spilled drinks at their feet. One of them is a truly shocking blue liquid with whipped cream and pink goo swirled through the sticky remains. He stares at the mess on the sidewalk for as long as he can stand it before finally forcing his eyes up. 

Loki is gazing serenely at Brunnhilde while she snarls, still pinning him to the wall. “Hello, soldier,” he says in a low, cockney accent. She jerks back as if he’d burned her. Loki smirks meanly, leaning against the wall and panting shallowly. Brunnhilde takes another step back. 

Thor takes a moment to gaze at the man. His hair is still black, just as when Thor had last seen him, but longer and straighter. He looks even slimmer, like he’s been avoiding the gym. He’s wearing white sneakers, yellow short-shorts, and an electric blue top that hangs off his right shoulder. The one with the freckle. Thor’s eyes jerk back up at the familiar sound of his husband’s quiet laugh. Loki is looking back and forth between the three of them. Tony’s joined them at some point apparently. 

“I see we’ve been making friends,” Loki smarms, back to his American accent. 

“Yeah, we’ve recently discovered that we all have a little something in common,” Brunnhilde sneers. “Any idea what that might be?” 

Loki looks at her with mockingly innocent eyes. “No ideas.” 

Thor growls and advances on him. Loki jerks back violently, his eyes going wide. Thor stops. Loki looks absolutely terrified. It’s the same look he’d gotten that time he’d stopped breathing when Thor grasped his neck for the first time. Only, that time, the look had been directed at a person in Loki’s memory. Thor never thought he’d see that look directed at himself. Thor’s anger bleeds away, leaving an empty, aching sadness. He stays two feet away from Loki, gazing into his eyes. “Baby, why?” He hates that his voice cracks. 

He wishes he didn’t see Luke in the crease that flickers on Loki’s brow, gone before a true frown can form. They stare at each other for what feels like hours until Loki’s gaze flickers over to Tony, who’s being uncharacteristically quiet, then to Brunnhilde. It settles back on Thor as he says, “How about you lot buy me a new coffee, seeing as mine is now on your shoes?” Thor notices he’s currently standing in the puddle of spilled drinks.

Without waiting for a response, Loki turns in the opposite direction from the coffee shop they just left and begins to walk. Tony is the first to follow him, Brunnhilde and Thor glancing at each other before joining in the procession. 

Loki leads them to a little hole-in-the-wall cafe that’s nearly empty. He goes to the counter and orders a black coffee. The other three order the same. Tony pays for all of them. Loki sits on one upholstered bench of a booth and the other three cram into the one across from him. None of them make a move to drink. Thor wonders if they all feel as queasy as he does.

“Who’d like to start?” Loki asks, pleasant and empty, like a sales rep asking out of politeness.

Brunnhilde growls, “You vile, false, Norwegian bastard--”

“Ah. I see you’ve learned of my true parentage.”

“Oh we know more than that, _ Loki _,” Brunnhilde spits.

Loki’s face seems to drain of the little color it has. He glances at Thor and Thor’s heart skips a beat. But then Loki recovers and reclines further back in his seat. He skims his eyes over the three people in front of him. “So,” Loki starts, “to what precisely do I owe the pleasure of this visit?”

“We’re here to get our stuff back.” Tony finally breaks his silence, tone somewhat flat.

“Ah, he speaks,” Loki says condescendingly. “I’d begun to miss that compulsive yammering of yours.” Tony looks like he just saw a puppy get shot. Loki quirks a twisted smile. “And what ‘stuff’ would you be referring to?” he asks, all snark.

Thor cuts in. “Enough games, Loki.” He searches this stranger’s face for anything of the man he loved. All he sees is a coldness that is wholly foreign. Thor’s voice goes watery as he implores, “Why have you done this?” It’s obvious he isn’t referring to the thefts. 

Loki’s expression flickers in a way that gives Thor hope of - something. He watches Thor for a long moment until finally letting out a puff of laughter. He looks straight into Thor’s eyes when he next speaks. 

“I don’t have it.”

Thor baulks. “You think this is about the damned Tesseract?” 

He receives three separate shushes. They all glance around to ensure no one heard Thor’s mention of the illegal technology.

Loki’s expression turns amused. “What else would it be about?”

“You know damn well what!” Thor bellows. 

Loki makes a _ tch _ noise and cocks his head. “So angry,” he says in Luke’s posh British accent. “What happened to that sweet Oaf I married?”

Thor feels as though he’s been slapped. 

Loki switches back to the American accent. “You always were the easiest one to manipulate.” 

Thor lunges at him. 

Tony and Brunnhilde both grab his arms. He lets himself be pulled back down to the bench and slumps against his friends. He feels as though Loki just cracked open his ribs and sliced out the treacherous hope that had been cultivating there. 

Loki’s face remains smug. “You all are just children trying to play with big kid toys you don’t understand. Give up. Go home.”

“Do you think we came all the way here just to let you get away?” Brunnhilde snarls.

Loki’s face turns hard. “I think if you like being alive and would like to stay that way, you will turn around and go back home.”

Brunnhilde’s eyes narrow. “Is that a threat?” 

“Yes.” The sound of a gun cocking under the table has all three of them going pale. “Now, I’m going to walk out that door. And you’re going to let me. Then you’re going to go home and move on with your lives. Pursuing this will bring you nothing good.” His hand goes behind his back, tucking the gun into the back of his shorts, Thor supposes. He stands and walks out of the cafe. 

They let him.

  
  



	24. The Invitation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the lovely feedback on last chapter! Now for Loki's perspective on things...

As soon as Loki’s out of the cafe, he doubles over and pukes on the sidewalk. 

How the hell did they find him? Did they hire someone? They shouldn’t have been able to afford it with all their money gone. And there’s no way Odin or Hela had helped. This is very, very bad. Those idiots are going to get both Loki and themselves killed. The Order cannot find out about this. 

He runs a hand down his face. He’s so glad he downloaded that sound effects app. He’d been desperately trying to pull up the right sound while they were talking. Luckily, it seems to have worked. Judging from how little blood was left in their faces when he left, they’d really believed he had a gun and would be willing to use it on them. That makes him sad, for some reason.

Loki straightens, wipes his mouth, and starts walking back toward Sakaar. He can’t let this interfere with the job. Thanos had made it very clear that he couldn’t be distracted this time. Not after the ‘last one’. 

His steps falter. Thor. He’d thought he would never see him again. Had steeled himself for the pain of separation. He had not prepared for the far more agonising experience of reunion. Fuck. Thor’s face. He’d looked so goddamn sad. 

He keeps walking.

En Dwi is lounging in a large bean bag chair by the window and tinkering with some bit of machinery when Loki walks into the older man’s office on the top level of Sakaar. 

“Ah, there you are, Pet! What took your, hmm, cute little butt so long getting up here?”

Loki pastes a smile on his face. “Oh, I just ran into a few old friends that wanted to catch up.” 

“Mm, and where’s that, uh, you know, that coffee? I wanted my extra special blue latte.” 

Damn. He’d forgotten all about the reason he’d run into the three stooges in the first place. Time for distraction. “Ah, but I can think of another blue thing that’s much more fun to eat.” He gestures to his bright blue shirt. It physically pains him to suppress his wit and play the ditz.

En Dwi hums and gets up from the bean bag. “Hmm, I’ve never had much of a taste for - for eating clothing.” Loki can tell he’s endeared by the young, inexperienced flirting, though. 

Loki huffs bratily, all part of the act. “Oh, you know what I meant, En! You wanna eat me out or should I just go home?”

En Dwi laughs loudly. “Ah, pet, you are insatiable. Come here, come here.”

Thirty minutes later, Loki is the one laying on the bean bag and En Dwi is flopped on the floor at his feet, both panting heavily. “Ah, ha, heh,” En Dwi pants, “That was indeed better than some, uh, some cheap beverage.”

Loki rolls off the bean bag and onto En Dwi. He huffs under Loki’s weight. “Told you. Now, why did you have me come all the way downtown to see you, anyway? It wasn’t just for coffee. You have interns for that.”

“Mm, as always, you are right, my pet.” He stands, unceremoniously dumping Loki onto the floor. Ow. Now his elbow is going to ache all day. 

En Dwi, still naked, skips over to his desk and pulls out a piece of stationary. He walks over and drops it on Loki’s bare stomach. It’s an invitation. 

“You’re inviting me to my own birthday party?” He raises a teasing eyebrow.

En Dwi gives him a big grin, the one that makes Loki’s skin crawl. “Ah, my lovely. If I didn’t, you would simply, uh, forget to show up.”

Loki drops the teasing look for a toothy grin to rival En Dwi’s. He jumps up and throws his arms around the older man. “Oh, En, I can’t wait! How did you even know when my birthday is?”

En Dwi laughs delightedly, hands finding Loki’s bare ass. “I asked your old employer at that, ah, mm, lovely establishment where we met.” He is, of course, referring to the strip club where Loki had worked for all of a week in order to, quite literally, land himself in En Dwi’s lap. 

“That’s so romantic!” Loki gives him an enthusiastic kiss, full of tongue.

Well fuck. This day just keeps getting worse. 

*******

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde slink back to the motel room liked whipped dogs. 

“Do you think he really would have shot us?” Brunnhilde asks through a trembling lip. 

Thor considers that as he lays back on the beige bedspread. He’s feeling strangely numb. “I don’t know. It certainly seemed that way.” He thinks a moment more. “I suppose we don’t really know him. None of us. He could be anyone. And that could be an anyone who would shoot us.”

Thor honestly can’t tell what he thinks of this. His mind is a blank field of snow. All he knows is that he missed his chance to get through to Loki. Of course, that’s if Loki is even worth getting through to. What if the man Thor knew truly was just a lie? What if Loki is just a cold hearted con man and there’s nothing there to get through to?

Tony flips on the television. It’s on a news channel. He doesn’t change it. 

Thor allows his mind to focus on the screen. A woman with no movement to her hair is reporting on ‘Exciting Things to do in Miami.’ Apparently there’s a lot. Thor listens without any real interest as she plugs sports games, bars, and concerts. But then she teases an upcoming event that has all three of them sitting up and paying attention. 

“_ And of course, don’t miss the big fireworks show this weekend. En Dwi Gast is having a party and we all know what that means.” _


	25. Brother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Party time

En Dwi loves parties. He takes advantage of any opportunity he can sniff out to throw one. 

Loki hates parties. He hates the crowd, the noise, the ceaseless socializing with people he doesn’t like. He especially hates En Dwi’s parties because they take all of the things Loki hates about parties and multiplies them by 10.

En Dwi has outdone himself for Loki’s fake birthday. Everyone from En Dwi’s company, all of his friends, and probably 50% of Miami is in attendance. They all buzz through En Dwi’s enormous penthouse like flies swarming around the corpse of Loki’s sanity. 

There’s an open bar and it’s clear that few have failed to take full advantage of it. There’s a live band on one side of the suite and karaoke on the other. Fireworks can be seen going off regularly through the floor to ceiling windows. The other noise drowns out their explosions. 

Loki is miserable and he is thrilled. He is, indeed, thrilled  _ because _ he is miserable. On his last job, with Thor, he had thought he was losing his touch. He kept letting his emotions get in the way of his work and breaking character. But not now. Now, when Loki is more miserable than he has been for some time, his acting is flawless. Loki, the God of Lies, is back. He laughs and jokes and sings, all while wanting to stab someone. And he doesn’t break character once. 

Shortly into the night, he finds himself chatting with Bruce Banner, one of Sakaar’s head research scientists. Bruce is one of the few people in the room that Loki can actually stand. However, Loki does have to keep a tight leash on his tongue to stop himself from getting drawn into intelligent conversation with the man. Bruce’s research is fascinating and impressive, but Loki is not meant to be intelligent here. He is the young, bratty sugar baby who uses his looks, rather than his wits, to get what he wants. Being too smart makes you into a threat, makes you suspicious. 

“You’re so funny, Bruce! I swear, I don’t understand half the words you say. I’m convinced you just make them up to entertain yourself while sitting in a boring lab all day.” Loki cringes internally at the sound of his own voice. It’s begun to grate on him just as much as the other drunken hollering in the room. 

Bruce smiles somewhat amusedly. Before he can respond, though, they’re interrupted by En Dwi giving Loki’s ass a hard slap. Ow. 

“There you are, Pet! I’d begun to think you’d run off with a, uh, another man.” 

Loki gives En Dwi a sultry smile over his shoulder and turns to slide his hands over the man’s chest. “As you can see, I’ve just been talking to frumpy little Brucey here. I’m hardly being swept off my feet by those loafers.” 

Bruce huffs behind him. En Dwi laughs and puts his hands on Loki’s waist. “Hmm, don’t mind my dear little pet, Bruce. He uses up all his, uh, mm, kindness, yes, in our bedroom. There’s just none left to spare for anyone else.”

Bruce smiles awkwardly, a strained, uncomfortable thing. 

“Oh, but that reminds me. Pet, your, uh, brother is here. I wasn’t aware you had one. Ah, but I know you don’t, uh, speak to that family of yours. Shall I have Korg toss him off the uh, uh, building?”

What? No one is meant to be posing as his brother on this job. Surely Helbindi wouldn’t… No, there has to be another explanation. But if it is Bindi...

“No! No, I want to see him.” 

“As you wish, my lovely."  En Dwi leads him to the entryway.  Bruce must be intrigued by the idea of a mystery brother because he tags along.

As soon as they round the corner, there’s a huge pair of arms surrounding Loki. All too familiar arms. But they don’t belong to his brother. Fuck. This is even worse than Bindi showing up. 

Over Thor’s shoulder, Loki sees Brunnhilde and Tony. He gives them a sharp look, putting as much venom into his wide, shocked eyes as he can. With some effort, Loki pulls back from Thor’s hug, which has been going just a little too long and feeling just a little too good. 

“Brother,” Loki says through his teeth, “What are you doing here?” He hopes the tightness of his voice passes as trepidation from being faced with an estranged brother. 

“How could I miss my brother’s big day?” Thor booms in a poor American accent. “And I brought my girlfriend Val!” He gestures awkwardly to Brunnhilde beside him. “And this is my friend Tom.” He nods toward Tony.

They both give wide, shiteating grins and wave. 

Loki ignores them. “Brother… I haven’t spoken to anyone in my - our family in nearly eight years.” His story with En Dwi is that he’s been estranged from his parents since leaving home when he was 18. 

Thor looks caught out for a second before recovering. “And I have missed you dearly! I’ve wanted to reconnect for a long time, but didn’t know where you lived. And then your upcoming birthday party made the news! I couldn’t believe I’d finally found you.” His voice goes quieter. “I had to see you.”

Loki ignores the sudden sincerity in Thor’s last words. 

The news, of course. That’s how they’d found out about the party. En Dwi’s larger parties were such a spectacle they generally made the news before they’d even happened. Loki suspects that En Dwi himself is usually the one to leak it to the press. There are probably scores of people on the streets below watching the fireworks. 

But they shouldn’t have been able to get inside without being on the guest list. Loki snaps his eyes up to look at Korg, who’s been hovering behind Tony. He glares at the giant man until he catches on that he’s in trouble. 

Korg raises his hands and says in his weirdly high, New Zealand accent, “Hey, man. The door guy called me and said your bro was here. I’m not one to stand in the wary of joyful family reunions with long lost loved ones.” 

Loki growls. Why did En Dwi hire such an imbecile to be Loki’s bodyguard? He instructed Korg to keep out from under his feet tonight and the man went and brought in three others for Loki to trip over in his stead. 

En Dwi interrupts with a loud laugh. “Come, Pet, you’re being rude. I think it’s, uh, mm, beautiful. Yes, it’s beautiful that he has searched so hard for you. This calls for another round of fireworks!” He prances off to tell Topaz to signal for more. 

Loki herds Thor, Brunnhilde, and Tony off to the side of the room. “I thought I told you to go home?” he snarls.

“You’re not going to scare me away,” Thor vows solemnly. 

“You let him call you ‘Pet’?” Brunnhilde’s lip curls. 

“That guy seems like a total creep,” Tony agrees.

A gentle hand lands on Loki’s shoulder. He turns. It’s Bruce. “Hey, Lucky, is everything okay here?”

Loki ignores Tony’s whispered, “Lucky, what kind of name is that?” behind him.

He forces a smile. “Yeah, of course Bruce! Let me introduce you to my brother and his friends.” He turns back to the menaces three. “This is my brother, uh--” 

“Donald,” Thor supplies, “Nice to meet you, Bruce.” He offers a firm handshake. 

“Bruce Banner. Nice to meet you, Donald.”

Tony snaps to full attention. “Banner? Not the renowned physicist, Dr. Bruce Banner?”

Bruce gives an embarrassed laugh. “Yeah, that’d be me.”

Loki clears his throat. “That would be Tom. And this is Val, Donald’s girlfriend.”

Brunnhilde shakes Bruce’s hand and they exchange pleasantries. Tony is still gaping at the physicist. 

Bruce looks between Thor and Loki. “For brothers, you don’t look much alike.”

He’s right. They have totally different builds, coloring, and features. Thinking fast, Loki says, “He’s adopted.”

Thor, stupidly, looks hurt.

Then the room lights up with a sudden wave of colored lights spilling in through the glass walls. Apparently the new round of fireworks En Dwi requested have begun. There are so many that the noise finally makes it past the pulsing music. Thor, Brunnhilde, and Tony, whose attention finally leaves Bruce, all gape at the explosions of color going off so close to them, illuminating the windows. 

Loki grits his teeth at the obnoxious display. Beside him, Bruce groans at the garishness. Loki wants to turn to the physicist so they can commiserate. Instead, he turns to En Dwi, who is striding toward them and switches on the boyish excitement. 

“En, It’s so beautiful!” He runs to meet En Dwi partway, throws his arms around the older man’s neck, and plants a loud kiss on his cheek. 

En Dwi giggles, looking quite pleased with himself and caressing the spot Loki just kissed. “Mm, only the best for my pet.” 

Loki resists the urge to gag. 

  
  



	26. The Anger

Thor watches his love throw himself on the other man. No, not his love, he tells himself, not Luke. Loki. 

It doesn’t make watching this any less painful. 

“En, it’s so beautiful!” The kiss to En Dwi’s cheek is loud and the sound of it echos around Thor’s skull.

“Mm, only the best for my pet.” There’s that word again. Pet. Like Loki is just one of En Dwi’s possessions. 

Loki giggles as the older man grabs his ass through the booty shorts he’s wearing. Thor sees red. 

Before he realizes he means to, he storms forward and rips En Dwi’s hand from the pert ass, grabbing Loki around the waist and pulling him away from the older man. “Don’t touch him like that!” 

Thor freezes. Shit. What has he done? 

He hears a quiet, “Oh, fuck,” from Tony and a groan from Brunnhilde. Loki seems to be as frozen as Thor himself. En Dwi is looking at Thor with a shocked frown. 

Thor backpedals. “Ah, sorry! It’s just, the last time that I saw Lo - Lucky, he was still so young and he’s my baby brother, you know. And having just found him after looking for so long, I just--”

En Dwi doubles over with uproarious laughter. It seems to snap Loki out of his shock and he yanks himself out of Thor’s hold. He shoots Thor a glare that turns his emerald eyes into poison. Then he slips seamlessly into a perfect imitation of En Dwi’s laugh. It’s disturbing to watch just how easily he shifts into character. 

Loki straightens, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes as En Dwi leans on him, still giggling. They look so natural together, leaning against each other in a way that speaks to physical familiarity. They’re twins with their matching blue eyeliner and nail polish. Both of them are so tall and lean, graceful like dancers. Thor shifts, feeling the need to hide his bulk. 

“Oh, En, you should have seen how he was when I first started going out with boys, back in grade school. He was always so overprotective.”

En Dwi wraps his arms around the younger man’s waist and nuzzles his temple into Loki’s. Loki nuzzles back. Then En Dwi looks at Thor. “I’m happy to hear it, Donald. When you showed up right after your brother found himself a, uh, rich, influential boyfriend, I was understandably, mm, suspicious of your intentions. I’m glad to see that you are very much here for him and not for me. Or my money, that is.” His voice goes sterner. “But I will have you know that I am here for him as well. Lucky made the - the choice to remain away from you for, uh, years. Meanwhile, he’s made the choice to stay with me. I do believe that gives me, hmm, ownership rights.”

Thor tries really, really hard not to punch him. He only succeeds because Brunnhilde grabs his wrist tightly enough that the bones creak.

Loki tugs on En Dwi’s sleeve and says in a whiney voice that Luke would have slapped someone for using in his presence, “En, this is boring. Donald never was any fun. I want to dance now.”

En Dwi’s stern look morphs into a smitten smile as he looks back to Loki. “Of course, my lovely. Lead the way.” The two leggy men prance off without another word to the three heartbroken exes. 

Thor looks back at his partners. Tony looks like he might cry. Brunnhilde looks mad. Oh, and apparently Bruce is still standing there.

“Mr. Gast isn’t so bad once you get to know him,” Bruce offers kindly. 

Thor sneers, unthinkingly says, “I don’t want to like him.” 

Bruce gives him a funny look. People seem to be doing that with him a lot lately. 

“I need a drink,” Brunnhilde mutters darkly and starts walking toward the bar. 

Bruce looks after her and then back at Thor. “You and your girlfriend having issues?” He seems to be saying more with the question, but Thor doesn’t know what it would be. 

Tony laughs. “Oh, she’s just tired. They’re fine, we’re all fine.”

Bruce looks unconvinced, but nods. “Well, it was nice meeting you.”

“Yes, yes, so nice meeting you, Dr. Banner!” Tony exclaims.

“Just Bruce is fine.”

“Bruce.” He says it nearly reverently. 

Bruce nods, throwing one last funny look at Thor and walks off into the crowd. 

Tony whirls on Thor. “What the fuck was that?”

Thor gives him a defensive pout. “I just--”

“You just made both Loki’s boyfriend and Bruce Banner himself think that you wanna boink your own brother!” 

Thor is taken aback.“What?”

“You were drooling all over Loki and acting all jealous and possessive! And then your girlfriend stalks off right after the display. That doesn’t look good, buddy.”

Thor flushes scarlet. Well, fuck.

*******

Loki pulls En Dwi onto the dance floor in a desperate attempt to avoid any further disasters. Thor is acting like an absolute imbecile and will fuck this whole job up if Loki isn’t careful. At least Tony and Brunnhilde mostly kept their mouths shut. 

“Ah, Pet, that brother of yours is, eh, odd.”

Loki cringes. Thor had acted like a jealous boyfriend. It had been obvious possessiveness, uncharacteristic of a brother who hasn’t seen Lucky in eight years. Loki decides it’s time for another distraction. He has a feeling the menaces three are going to create the need for a lot more of those. 

“En, how about you let me thank you for this party?” 

“Mm, what did you have in mind?”

“How about a reenactment of the night we met?” En Dwi purs in response. Loki drags him over to a long white couch and pushes him down. Then he steps back and begins a much raunchier dance. He snakes his body in a sinuous wave to the hard bass of the music. 

He slowly dances forward until his belly button grazes En Dwi’s chin. When En Dwi reaches up to touch him, he slaps his hands away. Then he straddles the older man with his knees on the couch. He continues to dance, bracing his hands behind himself on En Dwi’s knees, arching his back, and letting his head fall back. 

He opens his eyes, getting an upside down view of the room behind him. He spots the menaces three, makes eye contact with each of them, grinning maniacally. He does it to be cruel. He needs to make them give up and leave. They won’t get their stolen property back. They won’t get their fake spouses back. If they keep trying, they’re going to get Loki killed. And above all else, Loki looks out for himself. 

He stands and turns to give En Dwi his back. He spreads his legs wide and shakes his ass in the man’s face, hears an appreciative hum. Then Loki looks back to Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde. He lets himself look. Really look. It’s the first chance he’s gotten to do so without panic clouding his mind. 

Brunnhilde has grown her hair out. It looks nice. But she’s holding a very full glass of tequila, which means she’s fallen off the wagon again. And watching Loki dance on En Dwi, her eyes look haunted. It’s a shame. She has enough ghosts in her mind already.

Tony looks drawn, less healthy and carefree. Since they’d found Loki, the man has been uncharacteristically quiet. Loki is legitimately starting to miss his wit. His eyes on Loki are lost and confused, surely trying to reconcile the whore in front of him with the gentle woman he knew. 

And Thor. He’s as beautiful as ever and even more massive than Loki remembers, tall, broad, and thick. Loki wonders if Thor’s been eating his feelings. Loki certainly has, although, like a snake, he always seems to stay slender once his kills are digested. Thor’s hair is short now. Loki mourns the locks, but their golden color at least remains. Thor’s posture, though, has changed. He almost looks… insecure. It doesn’t suit him. As he watches Loki dance in En Dwi’s lap, Thor’s eyes scald him. He looks sad, angry. That doesn’t suit him either. 

All three of them have purple bags under their eyes as though they haven’t been sleeping enough. They all seem to have aged years in the months since he’s seen them. They all look broken. 

Loki did that. 

*******

Thor is trembling. Luke always made him feel like he was on a roller coaster, unpredictable and exciting. This new man, Loki, makes him feel like he’s on a roller coaster too. But it’s not exciting. He feels ill, like his insides are getting shoved around with the force of the crests and drops. He feels like things are moving too quickly and yet the ride never seems to reach the end. He feels like he’s hurtling through space, the intensity of the wind blinding him, making his eyes water. He has whiplash from how many directions and plummets his emotions have swerved in the past few days. 

The man he married is currently dancing like a cat in heat on the lap of another man. When he looks at Thor, a sick grin splitting his face, his eyes hold no love, no long-suffering affection, no Luke. He looks at Thor like a feline would a rat, delighted with his intention to crush Thor between his jaws. 

Luke had not been gentle, but he was never truly cruel. He was sharp, scathing, mean even. But never would Thor have thought him capable of taking sadistic pleasure in torture, the way he now seems to. 

In that shitty cafe two days ago, Loki had put on Luke’s posh accent, called Thor ‘Oaf’. He’d so easily slipped on his Luke suit, exactly as Thor just witnessed him do with the Lucky suit. The man is a psychopath. He switches personalities like clothes. Brunnhilde was right. This man never cared about any of them. He never cared about Thor. Luke wasn’t real. This is not the man he knew. The man he knew is dead, if you can say that of someone who never existed in the first place. 

As Thor watches his husband dance all over his new boyfriend, he is overwhelmed with grief. He thinks he knows how Loki’s mother felt, mourning for her lost son. Thor’s husband is gone. He no longer has the comfort that Luke is out in the world somewhere, living on, even if it is without Thor. No, Luke is gone entirely, devoured by this viper called Loki. 

Thor at last finds the anger he knew he should have been feeling all along. He looks at the man he loved and feels hate. Hate that, for some reason, makes him want to curl up in a ball and cry for the rest of eternity. 

  
  



	27. The Real Loki

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone who celebrates it had a great Thanksgiving! For those who don't, I hope you had a lovely Thursday :)

Loki is fast losing the control he’d finally gotten back. He’s spent the past hour of the party wearing two distinct masks. He’s been trying to keep En Dwi distracted, playing sugar baby Lucky, while simultaneously glaring down the menaces three, playing the heartless psychopath. He can’t remember ever having played two characters at once. It’s exhausting. 

He has been pretending to be quite drunk for a while now. It fits with his Lucky persona and, more importantly, it covers his fatigue and gives him an excuse for the somewhat erratic behavior that comes with juggling distractions and avoiding the menaces. 

Not to mention that Loki’s pretty sure Bruce’s scientific gaze has noticed the personality split. The man has been watching Loki and the menaces three rather closely since Thor’s outburst. He’s only become more watchful since catching sight of Loki’s death glare aimed at the menaces. 

And now, of course, Loki remembers Bucky is here too. Thanos always assigns two people to accompany Loki on his assignments. Usually, he gets Nebula and Gamora. However, while on the Stark job in New York last year, Loki scouted a new recruit. Bucky had been working for Stark Industries operating machinery. Loki saw something familiar in his eyes. 

He had gotten to know Bucky well during his time as Elle. The man was a veteran who had found himself unable to fit back into his old life upon return. He had been taken and tortured as a prisoner of war for over two years before he was rescued. When he returned, he went through years of therapy, both physical and psychological. In an attempt to get him reintegrated into society, Tony had given him a job at Stark Industries as a favor to their mutual friend, Steve. 

Bucky’s time in captivity had taken from him the carefree innocence of his youth and left him with a bitter harshness. It had also taken his arm. His prosthetic hindered him, made him feel even more out of place in a world full of two-armed people who’d never killed. He no longer possessed skills suited for the real world. His talents laid in subterfuge and brute force, not desk work and socializing. 

Loki had looked into Bucky’s eyes and understood what he saw there all too well. He knew from experience, this man would never fit into the normal world. He would never find peace there. So Loki had tested him. He gave Bucky glances of Loki’s own darkness, his talents for mischief and lies. He gave subtle suggestions that there were still things suited to Bucky’s talents, if only he were willing to acknowledge them. He planted a seed in Bucky’s broken mind, watched to see if it would grow and twist its roots into his brain matter the way it had with Loki so many years ago. 

When the time to steal the Scepter came, he gave Bucky an opportunity. “You can’t stop me. It’s done. Stark Industries will fall. But you can come with me.” 

Bucky had joined Thanos’s Order. They have spent the year since then grooming him, teaching him. This is his first job in the field. In place of Nebula, he is working beside Gamora assisting Loki in conning En Dwi Gast. Nebula had not been pleased at having her job stolen. Loki’s pretty sure she really is in the hospital this time. 

Bucky is posing as a security guard. He’d easily gotten hired by En Dwi. The man had seen Bucky’s missing arm and immediately declared him a “tough biscuit”. Unfortunately, instead of hiring him as Loki’s guard as they’d hoped, he was given the duty of guarding Sakaar’s second in command, Topaz. Meanwhile, Loki had gotten stuck with the imbecile, Korg, as his personal guard. This means that any time Loki snoops, he has to find a way to lose the lumbering idiot. 

Because Bucky is guarding Topaz, though, that means he is also at ‘Lucky’s’ birthday party. Loki looks between Bucky and the menaces three. Bucky is standing guard behind Topaz where she is slicing herself some cake. The menaces three are all crowded around the bar. Drowning their misery, Loki supposes. 

He can’t let Bucky and Tony come into contact. At least, not until he’s thought up an explanation to give Bucky that will keep him from reporting this to Thanos. And so he adds another person to his juggle, keeping En Dwi, Bruce, and now Bucky from coming into contact with Thor, Brunnhilde, and Tony.

This is only made harder when the damn menaces decide to split off from each other and cause their own individual mayhems. Brunnhilde, of course, remains at the bar, drunkenly hitting on every remotely attractive person. All the while, she sends Loki scathing looks full of sour hurt. Tony breaks off to join a group of Sakaar scientists in their discussion about gamma radiation. The man clearly has no concept of keeping a low profile. Not many people even know what gamma radiation is. Thor, meanwhile, starts walking toward the circle of people talking with Loki. Fuck.

*******

Thor latches onto his newfound anger. He won’t let that snake get away with this. He destroyed Thor’s life. He destroyed Brunnhilde’s, Tony’s, and he’s going to destroy En Dwi’s. Thor can’t really bring himself to care whether En Dwi’s life is ruined, if he’s honest, but the principle still stands. 

As Brunnhilde drowns herself in tequila and Tony wanders off citing the need for distraction, Thor watches Loki. He’s standing at the center of a group of five other people. Apparently, whatever story he’s telling is hilarious. Three of the listeners have spouted their alcoholic beverages out their noses in their laughter. There was a time that Thor would often laugh just as hard at Luke’s wit. 

Thor downs the rest of his beer and makes his way over to the group. He sees Loki shoot him a glare with his poison green eyes. He ignores the warning and continues on toward them. He sidles up to stand across the group from Loki, listening as the snake continues his story without so much as a pause at Thor’s intrusion. 

“--and I told him that the only way I would go home with him was if he could get that carrot out of his ass.” 

The group cracks up once more at ‘Lucky’s’ story. Thor doesn’t.

“What did he do?” a stout man to Loki’s left asks through snorts of laughter.

“Oh, isn’t it obvious? He cried and ran out, with a very comical limp, I may add.” Loki grins boyishly. “And then I called up my friends--”

Feeling a need to be cruel, Thor interjects, “I thought you didn’t have any friends, Lucky.” He thinks back to Farbauti, Laufey, and Helbindi, all saying the same. 

Loki looks sharpley at Thor. Something flickers across his face, interrupting the smug grin he’s been sporting all night. He recovers quickly, though. “Of course I do, Donald. You haven’t seen me in eight years. Clearly your memory of me is damaged.” 

A tiny woman to Thor’s right perks up. “Eight years? Why the long separation?”

Loki looks over at her. “I left home at 18. We’ve been estranged ever since.” He looks back at Thor. Tightly, he says, “Until recently.” 

“Yes, I’ve missed Lucky,” Thor says. “But we haven’t been entirely without contact.” He sends Loki a smug smile of his own. “Lucky sends me postcards every time he visits a new city.” 

Loki’s eyes widen, unhindered panic and horror showing through. Thor doesn’t know if he should feel proud or disgusted with himself. Mostly he just feels numb. His mouth continues on anyway. 

“He never writes anything on them, though. I suppose it’s for the best. He would probably just use the space to call me a big old Ogre.” Thor says the words as if in jest, but looks at Loki with cold eyes as he reveals his knowledge of Loki’s nickname for his real brother, Helbindi. 

Loki’s reaction doesn’t disappoint. His mouth drops open and his martini hits the floor. The people nearest him scatter to avoid the shards of glass. 

Thor keeps going, not even flinching. “Mother and Father never hear from him, though. With how long it’s been, he might as well be dead. Our mother certainly cries enough that you’d think he was. Of course, Lucky never really cared about--” 

Loki slaps him. 

Thor blinks in shock, head still tilted to the side from the hit. Fuck. He’d gotten carried away. He hadn’t meant to go that far. He turns his head back to look at the man in front of him. Loki is visibly shaking, his hands clenched into fists at his sides, teeth cutting into his lower lip. There are tears in his eyes. 

Seeing the pain in Loki’s face, Thor feels like he’s been slapped a second time. He attempts to swallow past the lump in his throat. Tries again. “Lo - Lucky, I--”

Loki stalks away. The rest of the group scatters awkwardly, a custodian coming to clean up the broken glass. Thor feels gutted. 

*******

Loki locks himself in the bathroom. Then he lets the tears out, unhindered. Horrible sobs wrack his body as he hugs his arms around his chest. He leans against the door, slips down to slump on the cold tile. It’s the first time he’s let himself cry since he left Thor in London. 

Loki can’t bear all that Thor has learned about him. He knows about the postcards, about his nickname for Helbindi. That means they were in Helbindi’s house. They spoke to him. Thor knows about Loki’s pathetic younger self, who’d been devoid of friends, with a father and one brother who hated him, a mother and another brother who pitied him. 

He knows that Loki lived an ugly, lonely childhood. He knows Loki is legally dead. He knows of Loki’s career built on a pile of broken hearts. And he was so merciless in showing Loki just how much he knew. He laid bare the wreckage which Loki left in his wake. There was no love, no adoring grin, none of the kindness Loki had come to know from him. 

Thor came here looking for Luke and found an imposter in his place. Loki may have let Thor see more of himself than he had other marks, but never would he have given him this much. And now Thor knows it all. All of Loki. And he has just made his opinion on it all quite clear. 

Loki had always been certain that if Thor ever saw the real Loki, he would hate him. He was right. 

  
  



	28. Goodbye

There’s a knock on the bathroom door. Loki sniffs, wipes his cheeks. He’s in the bathroom that’s furthest from where the party is in full swing. He had hoped nobody would bother coming down the hall to find it. 

The knock comes again, this time accompanied by a voice. One that Loki knows intimately. “Hey, I know you’re in there. I just want to talk.” 

Loki ignores him. That’s the last thing he wants to deal with right now.

The voice quiets to a stage whisper, just barely making it through the door. “Loki, come on. Let me in.” Another knock.

Realizing that the stubborn man will sooner give Loki a concussion with his knocking than give up, Loki relents. He stands and looks in the mirror to make himself presentable. He has criss-crosses pressed into this bare thighs from the tile and red circles around his eyes from the tears. He gives up and opens the door. 

Tony’s raised fist almost knocks straight into Loki’s skull when the door is suddenly removed. Tony lowers his hand and laughs abashedly. Loki gives him an unimpressed raised eyebrow. 

“Sorry about that. I, uh - hey, have you been crying?” Tony gets on his tiptoes to peer more closely at Loki with concerned eyes. 

Loki sighs. He grabs Tony by the shirt, pulls him into the bathroom, and closes the door. No need to have this conversation where anyone could overhear them. “What do you want, Tony?”

Tony looks wounded by the question. “What do I want? There’s a whole lot I want. I want my company to have never been demolished. I want to be back in my house that I had to sell in favor of living in my dad’s damn flat. I want my life to be what it was. I want my wife back.” Tony sounds bitter and desolate. The last year has not been good to him.

Loki would pity him, except that he’d sworn off the practice long ago after being on the receiving end too many times. Instead, he thinks of Tony’s successful weapons company, committed to producing tools to help people slaughter one another. He thinks of Tony prospering on blood money. He thinks of the blood Loki himself would have lost had he not gone through with conning Tony. He feels no regret. 

“You will never get any of it back.” 

Tony sighs. “I know.”

“Then why are you here?”

“Because I need closure.”

Loki cocks his head. “And how will you achieve that?”

Tony huffs, looks at the floor, then back at Loki. “Can I - can you, uh, be Elle? Just for a minute. I need a final parting with her. I need to tell her goodbye.”

Loki thinks on it. Ultimately, he can’t see any harm in complying. If this is what it takes for Tony to get over Elle and leave Loki alone to con En Dwi in peace, then he’ll do it. Softening his expression and slipping into a lilting accent, he says, “ tu m'as manqué mon amour.”

Tony sucks in a breath, his shoulders slumping and his face scrunching like he’s been punched. He reaches out a shaking hand, tentatively reaching toward Loki’s face. When Loki makes no move to stop him, Tony strokes his cheek reverently. “There you are, Angel.”

Loki leans into the touch, turns his face to kiss Tony’s wrist. In Elle’s French accent he says, “I never left. I live inside of you.”

Tony shudders with a sobbing breath. His hands shoot up to grasp Loki’s face, dragging his lips down to his own. Loki resists the urge to push Tony away, instead allowing the kiss and the flood of unpleasant memories it brings with it . When they pull apart, Tony rocks his forehead into Loki’s. “Fuck, Angel, I miss you so much.” He sobs again. He looks desperately into Loki’s eyes. “I don’t care if you’re a man, a woman, neither, both,” he says urgently. “Please, Elle, Loki, I forgive you for everything. Stay with me, I--” 

Loki pulls away sharply, making Tony stumble forward from the sudden loss. Loki’s face returns to its hardened, empty stare, all traces of Elle gone. He watches the sobbing man and waits for Tony to pull himself together. 

When he regains his breath, Tony manages to gasp out, “You’re the devil.”

It reminds Loki of the good memories he has of Tony. He gives him a genuine smile, full of fondness. “I know.”

Tony’s face twists with confusion, then smooths out into understanding as they look into each other’s eyes. Loki wonders what he sees. 

When they leave the bathroom, Tony turns back to Loki as he stands in the open doorway. His face is somber, but resolved. “I forgive you. Not because I think you deserve it, but because I need to.” He watches Loki closely for a second. “And I think you need it too.”

Loki cocks his head, gives a surprised scoff. Why would he possibly need Tony’s forgiveness? He feels no regret. But Tony just keeps looking at him with those unwavering eyes. Loki rolls his own eyes loudly. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

Tony gives something close to his usual bright smile. “How about I get you a drink once we return to that god awful party?”

“Absolutely not, I can’t be getting drunk with that sleazy old man waiting to pounce on me at any opportunity.”

Tony’s smile broadens, turns amused.“You know, I don’t hate the real Loki.”

“A mistake on your part, I assure you.”

Tony laughs, almost sounding like his old self. It sparks a flare of fondness in Loki. His own smile turns genuine once more as he cups Tony’s face and leans down to gift him one final kiss. It’s slow, less desperate and sad than the previous one. They both know it will be the last one. It’s Tony finally getting his goodbye. 

“You Bastard!”

Loki and Tony spring apart at the shout. They both whirl to look down the hall with wide eyes. Brunnhilde is standing at the other end of the corridor, bracing herself drunkenly on the wall, face full of horrible anger. 

“How could you?” Brunnhilde screams, hopefully not loud enough for people in the midst of music and fireworks to hear. “You rotten, awful, fucking bastard!”

Loki and Tony share a glance. It’s impossible to tell which of them she means. Probably both. Then Brunnhilde is swiveling drunkenly away from them, stumbling back toward the thumping bass and flashing lights. Loki curses and runs after her. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'll be getting our face to face with Thor and Loki next chapter!


	29. The Other Man

Thor stands stunned after Loki storms away with tears in his eyes. He had looked so betrayed, so horribly sad. Those had not been the poison green eyes of the snake who’d been jabbing knives into Thor all night. Those had been the anguished emerald eyes of his husband, his broken, beautiful husband. 

Thor is hit with an intense wave of remorse. What if that snake had just been another act? What if he was just lashing out to protect himself? It makes Thor sick to consider that Loki might think he would need to defend himself from Thor. 

Then again, Thor just proved him right, didn’t he? He attacked Loki, sneering cruel words about his family, his bleak past. In his anger and hurt, Thor too had lashed out. And yet, he can’t regret it. Because it revealed to him a sight he knows well: cracks in Loki’s mask. 

Before, when he first met Loki, the man had worn a mask made of soft laughter and suave professionalism. Cracks in that mask had revealed a biting wit and chaotic brilliance underneath. Now, through this new mask made of razor teeth and sickly smiles, the cracks reveal a heartbreaking sadness. 

Thor thinks back to Helbindi. When they spoke, Thor had been so sure that the Luke he knew was the real Loki, at least in part. Seeing Loki-the-merciless-con-man in action had uprooted that hope. Now, Thor feels it sprouting once again. 

He’s distracted from his thoughts by a commotion that manages to be loud enough to crest over the pounding sound of the party. Turning to look, he spots Brunnhilde shoving past people toward the karaoke stage, shouting something that Thor can’t quite make out. Then he spots Loki trailing after her, pushing through people just as fiercely, and Tony trailing after Loki. 

Thor cocks his head, confused at the sight. He quickly catches on, though, and runs to trail after the other three. As he jostles his way through the crowd, he watches Brunnhilde climb onto the stage and grab the microphone from a mousey man in the middle of singing along to  _ Don’t You Want Me _ . Looking terrified, the man scurries away, forfeiting the stage to the clearly drunk and angry woman. 

Swaying slightly and slurring heavily, she announces into the microphone, “I want to give a toast.” She raises her glass of straight vodka, spilling most of it in the process. “To Lucky, the birthday boy.” She chugs what is left of her drink.

By this point, Loki and Tony have reached the front of the stage and are staring up at Brunnhilde with looks of horror. Thor finally makes it to them, not sure whether he should try and interfere by pulling Brunnhilde off the stage. Loki notices Thor’s arrival and glances over at him. Thor catches his eye and they share a worried look. Despite Thor’s concern over present circumstances, his heart swells at the brief moment of unity. 

Then Brunnhilde is continuing. “Lucky,” she overemphasizes the name, “is a really lucky guy.” She gives a sloppy giggle. “He gets everything he wants. Everyone he wants.” She seems to notice the three of them gathered at the front of the crowd then. Her eyes narrow on Tony, to Thor’s confusion. “And who would ever refuse him? No matter who else they had to step on to reach him.” Her glare aimed at Tony turns truly murderous. 

Thor decides it’s time to step in, being Brunnhilde’s fake boyfriend and all. He bypasses the stairs, jumping onto the stage right in front of her. “Okay, I thinks that’s enough, Sweetheart,” he says with false cheer. “Sorry everybody, I think she’s had just a few too many.”

Brunnhilde growls and tugs against Thor’s hold on her, but the alcohol has made her too uncoordinated to earn much headway. “You dolt, let me go.”

Thor ignores her struggles and pulls her off the stage, back through the crowd, and into an alcove away from the other drunken party attendees. “Get ahold of yourself,” he whispers fiercely.

“Fuck you,” she slurs. “You’re one to talk, been slobbering all over him since we got here.” Her eyes jerk up to glare at Tony who has just caught up to them. “Not as much as him though.” 

Thor turns to give a confused look to Tony. He notices the man’s eyes are red. His lips are red too, almost looking kiss swollen. Tony doesn’t meet Thor’s eyes. He looks guilty. As a scowling Loki comes up behind Tony, Thor turns a gaze full of dread to look at him too. Loki’s eyes and lips are just as red and swollen as Tony’s. Thor’s stomach drops. 

Brunnhilde gives a mean laugh at Thor’s expression. “Yeah, I caught them snogging by the bathroom.” 

Loki shoves into Brunnhilde’s space, crowding her against the wall. “That is none of your concern.” His voice is ice cold.

“You’re my fucking husband!”

“No. I’m not.” He leans closer, looming over her. “My name isn’t Lachlan. I’ve never been to war. I don’t meditate. I don’t have a dream of uniting the world in peace. And I’ve never had a drinking problem. Unlike some people.” He steps back, expression far too menacing for the bubblegum pink booty shorts he wears. “I’m not your husband. You have no claim to me. The sooner you accept that and move on with your life, the better off you’ll be.” He turns on his heel and saunters back out into the party. He doesn't even look at Thor. 

Heart on the floor, Thor stares after Loki until he loses sight of him. Then he wrenches his eyes back to Tony. It’s difficult to see him through the haze of rage clouding his vision. 

Logically, Thor knows he has no right to be angry at Tony. He was Loki’s husband too. And yet, Thor still feels betrayed. He has come to see Tony and Brunnhilde as his friends. And he only just regained some small degree of hope that the Luke he knew hadn’t been a complete lie. That, just maybe, Loki truly--

“How could you?” Brunnhilde’s voice is shattered. “Tony, how could you do that?” Her biting anger seems to have walked off along with Loki. 

Thor is plenty willing to make up for it. He growls at Tony. “You were just scheming to stab us in the backs this whole time. All you wanted was to get Loki back in the sack. You probably coerced him, forced yourself on him.” Thor’s mind is a whirl of nails and barbed wire. He ignores everything he knows about Tony to protect his own conscious from the possibility that Loki willingly kissed the other man. He can’t face what that could mean. He’s been hoping all this time that there was a possibility that Loki truly loved him, had fallen for his mark. To think that he had been correct, just about the wrong mark, is too painful to consider. 

“No! How could you think that?” 

“Because Tony,” Brunnhilde says sternly, only a slight slur detectable, “Why would he go back to you? You were just a sucker to him, like all of us were. He never loved you. Just like he never loved Thor. Or me.” Thor’s gut twists horribly at her words. “You can’t expect us to believe he flung himself at you, begging for it.”

Tony huffs, eyes on the floor. “It wasn’t like that.” He huffs again. “I was saying goodbye. Loki agreed to be Elle one final time so I could say goodbye to her. Move on.” He lifts his gaze to look at each of them. “We weren’t - she doesn’t--” He shuffles, looking miserable. 

Thor feels such relief at the words that it shames him. Because he knows he’s a hypocrite. If he had the chance to steal a willing Loki away from everyone else, including his two friends, he would do it without hesitation. 

“What we had is gone. She’s still alluring, sure, yeah. But she’s not Elle. Loki did me a kindness, in a weird sort of way, by showing me that. Elle was just a fantasy, not a real person.” Tony looks absolutely miserable. 

Brunnhilde sighs. “I’m sorry, Tony. It was wrong of me to jump to conclusions.”

Tony’s eyes soften. “It’s okay. I understand. I probably would have reacted the same or worse in your situation.” 

Thor fights against the niggling voice at the back of his mind whispering that just because Tony is ready to move on from Loki doesn’t mean that Loki doesn’t have any feelings for Tony. He chooses to instead focus on the voice telling him to right the wrongs he’s committed against his friend. “I am sorry too, Tony. What I said… I know that’s not you. My words are entirely a reflection of my own refusal to accept reality.”

“I’m serious, you guys. It’s okay,” Tony insists. “To be honest, I did go into that bathroom hoping to reconnect with my wife, no matter how that would have affected you. But instead, I was shown definitively that Elle truly never existed. It’s freeing, in a way. I’ve had a year to mourn the loss of her and now I think I’m able to accept this. You two are far more important to me than some fake woman who broke my heart.”

Thor thinks Tony forgives them too easily, considering the horrible things they accused him of in their anger. But he claims to understand their feelings, and Thor supposes he probably does. After all, the three of them are in the same position.

“Besides, Elle was a part of the life I had before. She wouldn’t fit so well now.” Tony offers a strained smile. 

Thor privately thinks Tony sounds like he’s trying a bit too hard to convince himself that all he says is true. Thor doesn’t call him out on it though. At least one of them is trying to move on. 

  
  



	30. At the Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unreliable. Narrator. 
> 
> a.k.a. Loki lies to himself a lot.

There’s still some commotion around the karaoke stage. Thor can’t hear it from across the room, but he can see En Dwi up on stage making calming gestures and motioning for someone to hand him a mic. 

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde agree that it might be best to avoid that area for a while. Instead, they find a secluded corridor and talk. Tony seems to have had a shift in his thinking since his conversation with Loki. Brunnhilde, too, has calmed down since the confrontation. She’s still angry, but she seems to have decided once and for all that Loki is not and will never again be Lachlan. 

Thor sees in both of their eyes some deep sadness dissimilar to his own. More final. And yet, he also sees relief. It’s a burden off their shoulders to have definitive proof that Loki is not Elle or Lachlan. They are free to see him as a different person than the spouse that broke their hearts. For Tony, that person seems to be an amusing and fascinating person worth learning more about. For Brunnhilde, that person is the ruiner of worlds. But despite how differently they see Loki, they are both entirely sure that he is not the person they knew. 

Thor finds himself almost envying them. Because he doesn’t have that relief. That freedom. That finality. Because he isn’t sure. 

The three of them agree to not allow Loki to come between them again. Their friendship has extended past their shared husband. No matter who Loki is and how they feel about him now, their friendship is worth too much to allow it to be ripped apart by him. 

“So what are we going to do for the rest of this god forsaken party?” Brunnhilde asks. She seems mostly sober now. 

“We should go find Ocean’s One. Cheer her up,” Tony suggests jovially. 

Thor perks up. “Yeah, he looked pretty upset. I bet he could use some company.” The suggestion significantly improves his mood. An opportunity to speak with Loki on civil terms sounds like exactly what Thor needs. Maybe he can make up for the awful things he said earlier. And, just maybe, he can crack this new mask as well as he had the last one. 

Brunnhilde rolls her eyes at them. “You guys do realize you’re talking about the man who conned you, ditched you, and stole all your money?” 

Thor and Tony glance at each other, shrug. Then they’re striding off in search of Loki. Thor hears Brunnhilde huff and follow. He smiles. 

*******

Loki collapses onto a yellow leather couch, stretching his legs along it. He’s at the end of his rope. Far too much has happened in this one night. 

The kiss with Tony had brought back lots of memories, not exactly pleasant. As Elle, Loki had always felt suffocated. There was something about being a woman that felt right, a something that Thor had later helped him put a name to. But as Elle he was never expressing it the way he felt it. Being relegated to the role of ‘woman’ felt just as restricting as being pigeonholed as ‘man’. Ronan had assigned him the job of playing a trans woman because Tony’s internet history had indicated a porn preference in that particular direction. As such, it was Loki’s job to fulfill that sexual fantasy. He had later learned that Tony was not nearly so simple as that, but by then the character of Elle was established. She was a woman in a tall, broad shouldered body that wanted nothing more than to feel small and delicate. Small and delicate are two of Loki’s least favorite things to feel. 

Tony, at least, seems to have accepted that Elle isn’t real. Loki figures it makes sense that, of the three, he’s the one doing the best job of that. Tony has had almost a full year of mourning to get over his wife. The hurt is still pretty fresh for Brunnhilde and Thor. Tony is also significantly older than the other two. Age brings with it a degree of maturity in most cases. Loki never would have attributed that quality to Tony, with his pop culture obsession and perpetual jokes, but he cannot deny it now. 

Brunnhilde is another story. Loki wonders whether he wrecked her the worst. Thor and Tony had lived relatively pleasant lives before Loki came along. Brunnhilde, though, has faced a life of struggle. When Loki met Brunnhilde, her mind was almost as broken as his own. During their time together, Loki had seen a remarkable change take place. The symptoms of her PTSD and depression had drastically reduced, she’d gotten sober, she’d started smiling. 

At the time, Loki had mostly been relieved that she had become less insufferable. He’d hated having to see her through PTSD episodes. They always made him all too aware of the treacherous waters of his own mind. He’d hated having to look after a drunken fool. He’d hated having to smile so damn much just to try and get her to mimic it. 

Loki had seen Brunnhilde’s recovery as a boon to himself, more than anything. It had made his job easier. However, seeing what’s become of her since he left, he can’t help but realize just how important that change had been to her and how losing it has been just as impactful. 

But while Brunnhilde may be in the worst situation out of the three, Loki thinks Thor is somehow the main one that can’t let go. Of Luke, of course, not Loki. Thor hates Loki.

Tony has accepted reality. Brunnhilde is obsessed with anger and revenge. Thor, though, seems violently split. One minute, he’s acting possessive and grabbing Loki away from En Dwi. The next, he’s snarling a list of Loki’s most horrible deeds to his face. Loki suspects that Thor is still holding onto Luke and yet struggling against his hatred for the horrible truths he’s learned about Loki. 

His time as Luke, with Thor, had been different from his other jobs. Not just Tony and Brunnhilde, but all of them. With Thor, with Frigga, Fandral, Sif, and Volstagg, Loki had found a place that he was able to be himself and be accepted. Loki knows he’s not a good person. He’s not a likable person. He’s never had a friend in his life. His own family hates him, perhaps save Helbindi. He had long ago accepted that he would never be loved. 

And yet, with Thor he had felt nothing but. Thor pushed and pulled until he forced some part of the real Loki out into the air. And, unlike every person before him, he hadn’t run. He had seen that sliver of Loki and he had accepted him, loved him. And with Thor’s favor surrounding him, Thor’s friends and Frigga had come to accept Loki as well. 

With every mark before, Loki had been miserable, but he had known it to be the only way he could fit into this world. He’s not the sort of person that does good things, makes people happy, is made happy. He is the type of person who desires a seat so high that none might ever see his face and judge him unworthy. He is the type who finds his only degree of satisfaction by building stair steps out of other people so that he may climb upon the throne he craves. Thanos is the one who can help him achieve that. 

Thor had challenged this. He had shown Loki the sheer power of acceptance, of untainted love. It had been tempting. It had been distracting. But, in the end, Loki proved himself to be what he’s always known: a lying snake with no regard for a life that isn’t his own. 

Loki stretches contentedly on the couch, comforted by the thought. Thor might hate him now, but Loki was the one to get the first laugh. And he will be certain to secure the last.

His head is tipped back, his eyes closed when he hears an amused voice. “How you doing, Ocean’s One?”

Loki smirks at the nickname. He actually understands that reference. He wonders whether Tony smoothed things out with his friends. Tries to decide whether he cares. He opens his eyes. “If it’s all the same to you, I’ll have that drink now.”

“What’s your poison?” Tony asks.

Before Loki can answer, a scotch appears in front of his nose. Thor is leaning over the back of the couch, handing it to him. He answers Tony’s question for Loki. “Scotch, neat.” 

Ah, so it appears Thor’s anger at him has abated. Well, Loki doesn’t feel like returning the favor. He sneers. “I hate scotch.” 

Thor’s face falls. “But--”

Loki stands up. Gods, Thor is still fixated on thrice damned Luke. Of course it would be one of the parts of Luke that contained absolutely no hint of Loki that Thor would remember so fondly. “What I said to Brunnhilde holds true for you. I’m not your husband. I don’t like scotch. I don’t have aspirations in advertising. I didn’t have a carefree childhood with loving--” He cuts off sharpley, realizing what he’s just said. God, he sounds so pathetic. He curses and pushes past Thor and Tony, only to run straight into Brunnhilde. She looks slightly less of a mess, but her glare is still firmly in place. Loki skirts her too and strides back out into the party. It’s time for this night to end. 

As Loki barges through the mass of sweaty dancers, he searches his mind for solutions. The most obvious way to get rid of the menaces three would be to turn them in to Thanos. Yes, he might be putting himself at some risk, but he’s far too valuable of an asset for Thanos to do any permanent damage to him. 

Loki slows his charge through the crowd. He can admit to himself now that his initial justification for not turning them in to the Order was not entirely truthful. He’d been lying to himself when he decided that Thanos would kill him for allowing himself to be tracked down by his ex-marks. The only thing that would truly be likely to bring Thanos to such measures would be if Loki betrayed him. For instance, if Thanos found out that Loki had purposefully hidden the fact that three of his past marks had tracked him down. That might get him killed. 

But, if Loki did turn them in, he could avoid that fate. Thanos might punish him for letting his past marks find him, but probably not until after the Gast job was complete and not so badly that he wouldn’t be ready for the next job after that. No, Thanos wouldn’t kill Loki if he were to turn Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde in. But he would kill all three of them. Loki has no doubt that, if he were to turn them in, Thanos would not hesitate to kill Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde. People who know what the Order does and who they are cannot remain alive.

And Loki… he can’t let that happen. As infuriating as those three are, he can’t stomach the idea of them being among the scores of bodies Thanos has left in his wake. They’re three of the few marks that he’s actually grown to have some degree of care for. There was a time, not too long ago, when Loki probably would have turned them in, despite his sentiment. 

But that was before Thor. No matter what happens, no matter how much Thor might hate Loki now, he cannot let Thanos touch him. 

So Loki can’t turn them in. And they’re clearly not going to leave on their own any time soon. The longer they stick around, though, the more danger they put both themselves and Loki in. If Thanos learns that they found Loki and that Loki didn’t turn them in, then Loki probably will die. Thanos would see it as aiding and abetting, betraying the Order. So Loki needs another solution. One that doesn’t result in any deaths. 

He finds Bucky. The man is standing vigilant guard to the side of the karaoke stage as Topaz watches En Dwi sing along to  _ Sweet Transvestite _ . Loki has seen little of his current mark in the last couple hours. Small mercies. At the end of his meager supply of patience, Loki grabs Bucky by his good arm and drags him over to the edge of the room. 

“Lo - Lucky? What is it?”

“We have a problem. But you cannot report what I’m about to tell you to the Order. I got you into this life and I promise you that I can get you out of it.” To another person, the words may have sounded like a promise. To Bucky, Loki knows they sound like a threat. The last thing he wants is to go back to the life he left behind. “Clear?”

Bucky nods quickly. “Yes, I promise. I owe you my freedom. I’m loyal to you over Thanos.” 

Loki shushes him. “Don’t. Say that name.” Bucky looks desperately apologetic and Loki softens. “There’s a bit of a situation. Your past employer, Tony Stark, is here.” Bucky’s eyes go wide. “He and two other past marks of mine. They tracked me here somehow. We cannot let them ruin this job.” 

  
Loki explains the situation to Bucky and gives him clear instructions. When he’s done, Bucky nods unhesitatingly and goes off in search of Korg. Loki feels a swell of smug satisfaction. The menaces three may have had surprise on their side tonight, but Loki has Bucky. 


	31. Hot and Cold

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde all stare after Loki’s retreating form. Again. Thor wonders how many more times this will happen. 

“Well, that went well,” Brunnhilde says, voice laden with sarcasm. 

“I think he’s warming up to us,” Tony grins, unperturbed. 

Thor stares sadly after Loki until he loses him in the sea of drunks. There’s only one thought that manages to make it through his disappointment that brings him comfort: he’s made another crack in the mask. When Loki had sneered at Brunnhilde for calling him ‘husband’, the coldness that had been surrounding Loki since they found him in Miami had been arctic. He’d been menacing, but that coldness made him seem removed, unaffected. However, just now when he yelled at Thor for the same transgression, it hadn’t felt cold. It felt hot, impassioned with real ire. 

This tells Thor one thing. That he made Loki legitimately angry. What that means, he isn’t quite sure. Perhaps Tony and Brunnhilde were correct when they said it sounded like Loki hated Thor. Or perhaps Thor inspires stronger emotions in Loki for a different reason. Either way, Thor decides to see it as a positive. Because being able to make Loki angry is to his benefit. Annoying Loki into a rage has always been Thor’s most successful method for getting a genuine reaction out of the man. And he’s determined to get his face-to-face with the real Loki, without any masks or lies between them, whatever it takes. 

Tony and Thor ban Brunnhilde from drinking any more that night and she bans them from seeking out Loki right away. With nothing better to do, the three of them take over the hideous yellow couch that Loki had been lounging on. They’re watching En Dwi from across the room where he’s shimmying along the karaoke stage. The strange man has been singing along to a slew of increasingly raunchy show tunes. He’s currently in the middle of a very energetic rendition of  _ Contact _ from Rent. 

“ _ Sticky licky trickle tickle! Steamy creamy stroking soaking! _ ”

Thor shudders and tries not to imagine this man doing anything to Loki. Tony is making that rather difficult with his comments.

“Wow, Loki actually has to get it up for this guy.”

“Shut up, Tony.”

“ _ You whore! You cannibal! More! _ ”

“I mean, I wasn’t surprised at either of you. You’re both hot as fuck. But I can’t imagine this guy’s dick as anything but a balloon animal.”

“Shut. Up.”

“ _ Fire latex rubber latex bummer! _ ”

“I mean, wow, I don’t know whether to be horrified or impressed. Bleeding yourself dry to fake your death pales in comparison to the dedication needed to fuck--”

“Tony, shut up!” 

“I mean really--”

Their view of the stage is blocked out as a large figure steps in front of the couch. “Oh, hey guys. There you are.” They all blink dumbly at Korg, Loki’s giant bodyguard. “I don’t know if you remember me, but I’m that big tall guy who let you into the party. I do hope you’re enjoying yourselves. I’d feel just terrible if I’d let you into an event that turned out to be a horrible and traumatizing experience.”

They all give noncommittal grunts in response. 

“It sounds like you guys are all worn out from having such a blast. Well, you’re in luck. I’ve been instructed to introduce you to a really great dude. Loads of energy, this guy. Keeps it all on the inside though. Would never guess it with his stony face. But I’m sure it’s there. So, come on. Follow me.” 

Korg starts walking without waiting for a response. Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde glance at each other with raised eyebrows before confusedly following. As they pass the karaoke stage, En Dwi shouts into the mic. 

“Get up here, birthday boy!” 

Thor watches as two other men get down on their knees for Loki to use as footstools up to the stage. Loki steps on each of their thighs, using their heads to balance himself, and lands gracefully in front of En Dwi. The older man scoops Loki up in a lecherous hold and drags him over to the microphone. Together, they start singing  _ Touch-A Touch-A Touch Me _ . 

Thor’s thoughts darken and he steps toward the stage. He’s halted as Brunnhilde grabs his arm and gives him a disapproving scowl. He huffs and glances back at Loki on stage one more time before continuing along behind Korg. He leads them out of the penthouse and into the elevator. Thor is feeling Increasingly wary. “Who exactly are we meeting?”

“Oh, you’ll love him. Mr. Lucky likes him almost as much as he likes me. Almost. I’m his favorite, of course. But this guy’s a distant second.”

Thor only feels more worried, knowing that they’re meeting someone that is close to Loki. Then again, it was pretty obvious that Loki didn’t actually like Korg very much, so perhaps this other guy isn’t really a friend of his either. 

The elevator comes to a stop on the sixth floor of the large building. The doors open to reveal a very large, dark room. Thor can’t see any silhouettes of furniture or anything. He wonders what this floor is used for. They’re not in the Sakaar skyscraper, but in another building owned by En Dwi, which has his penthouse suite situated at the top of it. 

A dim light blinks to life. It casts strange spinning pricks of light over the room. Looking up, Thor realizes the source of the light is a disco ball hanging high above their heads. The meager illumination reveals that they are standing to the side of a very large swimming pool. Thor suspects this entire building, all 23 stories of it, is just one big funhouse for En Dwi. 

Thor feels Tony jump next to him and start poking him in the arm. He looks to where the shorter man is gesturing and nearly jumps himself. There’s a figure standing in the room, leaning against the wall adjacent to them. One of his arms is bent at a slightly unnatural angle, like a prosthetic. His features are mostly obscured in shadow, but Thor can just make out a pair of piercing eyes glaring in their direction. 

“Oh, hey man,” Korg says cheerily. “I brought Mr. Lucky’s new pals and newly reunited bro for you to meet, like you asked. I think you’ll really like them. They’re pretty cool. A bit weird, but you get used to it.”

“You can go now Korg.” Mystery man’s voice is deep and monotone. Thor feels his fighting instincts kick in. What the hell is this about? 

“Ah, man. I always get left out of the fun stuff. Alright guys, have fun.” With that, Korg lumbers back into the elevator and then they’re alone with mystery man. 

“And who exactly are you?” Tony asks.

Mystery man pushes off the wall and walks toward them. 

“Hold it right there,” Brunnhilde warns. “No closer until you tell us who you are.”

He keeps walking, not acknowledging that any of them have spoken. 

Thor squares his shoulders, making himself as big as possible. Which is quite a bit bigger than this mystery man, he notes, although the other isn’t small. He’s prepared to kick the guy’s ass if he needs to. 

The man stops several paces from them, finally stepping into the disco ball’s light. He looks them each in the eye. There’s something off about him, Thor thinks, something in his expression. He may be smaller than Thor, but he seems harsher, darker. He has the air of someone who could kill without hesitation. 

“Hey, aren’t you Steve’s friend?” Tony’s question draws three sets of eyes to him. 

Thor feels like he’s in the Twilight Zone, surrounded by disco light, shadowed men, and inane words. “What?” He’s comforted that at least Brunnhilde sounds as confused as he feels. Mystery man cocks his head in a way that reminds Thor of Loki, just a little. That makes him itch for some reason. 

“Yeah, you’re Steve’s friend. James, right?” Tony says, his expression turning puzzled. Thor is relieved that they all seem equally confused now. “What are you doing here? Do you work at Sakaar now?”

James, if Tony is to be believed about the man’s name, looks at Tony for a long moment. His expression is fixed in a blank stare. In the same monotone as before, he asks, “What do you want with Loki?”

Thor feels a jolt at hearing that name come out of this man’s mouth. How does he know Loki’s real name? Does he work for Loki? Then James’s question registers. Thor realizes they’ve never actually discussed  _ why _ they’re looking for Loki. It had just seemed like a forgone conclusion that they had to find him and - and what? Get their stuff back? Get him back? Instead of voicing any of that, he growls, “What’s it to you?” 

Tony snaps his fingers. “You’ve been looking for Loki too, haven’t you? I heard you disappeared around the same time as Elle. I get it now. You went after Loki, to get revenge on her for destroying my company.” Tony places his hand against his breast. “I’m touched. That really means a lot.” 

James gives Tony an unimpressed look. Brunnhilde clears her throat. “Tony, I don’t think he’s operating in your service right now.”

Thor’s brow furrows in grim understanding. “You work for Loki.” He doesn’t word it as a question.

Tony baulks, looking back and forth between them. “What? You were working for Loki all along? Were you a fake person too?” His shock quickly turns to anger. “You didn’t even lose your arm as an American hero, did you? Probably sliced it off yourse--” 

James, if that is his name, is suddenly right in front of Tony, slamming him up against the wall with his good arm across the smaller man’s chest. Thor’s never seen someone move so fast. “What do you want with Loki?” he repeats, monotone turning harsh and biting. 

Thor and Brunnhilde both make moves to intervene, but James is faster than them. He switches out his arms, shoving the stiff prosthetic up against Tony’s chest and using his good hand to withdraw a pistol from his waistband. He points it at Thor, then Brunnhilde. “I’m going to tell you this once. Leave Loki alone.” His glare is fierce. Thor thinks back to his earlier impression that this man could kill without hesitation. He steps back. So does Brunnhilde. 

Tony glares. “I gave you a job out of the goodness of my heart, you bastard. And this is how you repay me?”

James ignores him. “Loki is under my protection. I won’t let you close to him again. You’ll have to cut off my other arm to get past me.” 

Thor feels that itch again. This man seems far too invested in Loki to be just some henchman. He feels his scowl deepen. “What are you to him?”

James does that Loki-esque head tilt again, looking at Thor thoughtfully. Then he smirks. “Jealous, are we?” Thor growls and advances on him. He’s stopped by the pistol appearing in front of his face once more. It cocks. 

“Stop!” They all freeze at the cry. 

Thor knows that voice.

  
  



	32. A Chance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehe. Did anyone predict it?

At the voice, James whips his head around. He immediately lowers the gun and steps back. Thor and the others all look at the new arrival. Thor knows her. Why does he know her? Then it clicks. “You work at Asgard.” Seeing her here seems so out of place. What would an Asgard custodian be doing here? 

“You’re my neighbor,” Brunnhilde says to the woman. She and Thor exchange strange looks. They both know her? 

The custodian, Thor doesn’t recall her name, is looking back and forth between Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde with a somewhat incredulous expression. Then she looks to James. “What’s going on here?” James stutters out a few unsuccessful syllables, looking for all the world like a nervous child. All traces of the menacing killer from a few moments ago are gone. He seems intimidated and cowed by the custodian. 

With dawning realization, Thor recalls Tony saying that James used to work at Stark Industries. And this woman works at Asgard, or at least used to, and was Brunnhilde’s neighbor at some point. And now she’s here, with James. Which means that Loki has not one but two people working for him. Maybe more. Just how big of an operation is he running? Thor glares at the custodian. “You work for Loki too, don’t you?” 

She gives him a faintly disgusted look. “I don’t answer to him.”

James looks back and forth between them, still seeming nervous. “Loki said to--”

“You don’t answer to him either,” the woman snaps back. 

Thor is even more confused now. Neither of them work for Loki? Then who do they work for? And does that mean that Loki--

“Holy shit,” Brunnhilde says in an awed voice. “Loki is just a lackey.”

The custodian snorts. “What, you thought he was the mastermind behind this operation?” 

Tony and Thor both give sheepish shrugs. Brunnhilde crosses her arms. “We had no reason to think otherwise.”

“No, I suppose not.” The custodian hums. “So why are you all here? And why,” she turns to James, “didn’t you notify Loki and me immediately?”

James shifts uncomfortably. “Loki, uh,” he fidgets some more, “he - he already knows.”

The custodian’s eyes go wide and then narrow angrily. “And he didn’t report it? That greasy little--” She cuts off abruptly, her face turning pensive. Then she looks right at Thor. He gulps under her calculating look. Eyes still on Thor, she resumes speaking to James. “He purposefully hid their presence? From Me? From Daddy?” 

Thor blinks. Daddy? Is she related to their boss? Finally, she looks away from Thor, turning to James. “What did Loki tell you to do?” James keeps his mouth tightly closed. It’s clear he has no intention of repeating it for her. Interesting. That itch under Thor’s skin about this man’s devotion to Loki increases. 

The woman lets out a frustrated huff. “God, Bucky,” Thor assumes this must be the man’s real name, “he’s got you trained like a damn puppy, hasn’t he?” Bucky still doesn’t respond. She sighs. “Just go back upstairs. I’ll handle this.”

Bucky looks like he’s about to refuse, but the woman doesn’t give him the chance. “Leave, or I’ll report Loki for not notifying Daddy.” Bucky opens his mouth once more, but then shuts it. He nods once and reluctantly complies, walking away and getting on the elevator. 

As soon as it dings closed, the woman looks back at Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde. “So what are you all here for? Trying to get your stuff back? Not going to happen.”

“No.” Thor only realizes it was he who spoke after everyone in the room turns to look at him. He swallows. Even though he hasn’t given any real thought to why they came after Loki, practically speaking, he knows that there hadn’t been another option. If he hadn’t come after Loki he would have just remained depressed and miserable. He had to know the truth. And he’s not finished finding it. “I’m here because, whether what we had was real or not, he is the person who I have loved above all others. I had no option but to find him.”

Thor doesn’t remove his eyes from the custodian. He can’t look at the others, doesn’t want to know what they think of his answer. The woman looks back at him for a long moment, her face unreadable. Then she moves her gaze to Tony. “What about you?”

“Loki took everything with her when she left me,” Tony says. “My company is dead, everyone’s respect for me is undermined, my wife is gone. Where else do I have to go?”

The custodian looks at Brunnhilde. “And you?”

There’s a pause before Brunnhilde answers. She clears her throat. “Same. I’ve nothing to return to.”

The woman considers them all for a minute. Then she nods, seeming satisfied for some reason Thor can’t fathom. She sticks out her hand. “I’m Gamora.” Thor tentatively shakes it. So do Tony and Brunnhilde. “Alright, then I need the lot of you to listen to me.”

“And just why should we do that?” Brunnhilde challenges.

“Because I can help you. If our boss learns that you’ve managed to track Loki down, he will kill you.” She ignores them when they pipe up, raising her voice to talk over them. “And if he learns that Loki knows you’re here and hasn’t turned you in, he will kill Loki.”

All of them go silent at that. Just what kind of mad man do they work for? Thor can’t stomach the idea of Loki being under that kind of threat. Why would he work for someone so awful?

Tony is the first to recover. “So why do you want to help us? He’s your boss too. Won’t he kill you if he finds out?”

“Because he’s a tyrannical psychopath that needs to be stopped.”

Brunnhilde snorts. “If you really believe that, then why are you still working for him?”

“Because, as you said, if I were to betray him he would kill me.”

“So what’s different now? Why are you willing to risk it?” Tony asks, clearly unconvinced.

Gamora sighs. “Because, as slimy of a get as Loki is,” Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde all give her dirty looks, “somehow, I still actually care about the bastard. I’d rather not watch him get himself killed trying to keep you lot a secret. That, and,” she pauses for a long moment, “if I were to have Loki’s help, there’s a chance that we, along with a few others that I know, could have a shot at taking down Thanos.” She looks around at them. “And I think this may just be the group that can help me convince Loki to switch sides.”

  
  



	33. A Significant Look

They all gape at Gamora, wide eyed and slack jawed. 

“You want us to convince Loki to switch sides?” Tony asks disbelievingly. 

“Yes,” Gamora replies. “The fact that he hasn’t turned you in yet, despite putting his own life at risk by not doing so, is enough to tell me that you’re the people for the job.” Thor feels her words hit him. Loki is really taking that much of a chance to protect them from Thanos? Or is there some other reason he hasn’t turned them in? 

Brunnhilde’s face scrunches up. “So why hasn’t Loki turned us in yet? It sounds like that would be in his best interests.” 

Gamora shrugs. “Who knows? Loki’s mind is a convoluted place.” Thor doesn’t quite believe her. She must have some idea, what with her lack of surprise at the revelation. 

**“** How do you know Loki won’t change her mind and turn us in once she learns what we’re doing?” Tony asks. 

Gamora looks at Thor, despite him not being the one to have asked the question. “He won’t.” 

“Well, what if he just shoots us?” Brunnhilde asks. “He didn’t seem to have too many reservations about that before.”

Gamora cocks an eyebrow. “Loki doesn’t have a gun.”

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde all exchange looks. “Yes he does,” Tony says. “He threatened us with it.”

Gamora looks taken aback for all of three seconds before understanding dawns on her face. She barks a laugh. “That little shit. He has a stupid sound effects app that he uses to get out of things. Did you actually see the gun? Or just hear it?” Their sheepish expressions are her answer. She shakes her head. “Loki doesn’t carry a gun, he hates them. He’s more of a knife guy.” Thor can’t help but smile, despite the macabre topic. He feels like that suits Loki, for some reason. He’s also pretty relieved that Loki hadn’t in fact been prepared to shoot them. 

Brunnhilde’s scowl doesn’t lighten up though. “Okay, so what if he decides to shank us? Like you said, letting us continue flitting around undetected by your boss isn’t in his best interests. Killing us would solve his problem.”

“He won’t,” Gamora repeats. 

“How can you be so sure?” Brunnhilde retorts.

Gamora narrows her eyes meanly. “I know him a bit better than you.” The words are meant to wound and they succeed. All three of them are struggling with the realization that they don’t know Loki as well as they thought, if at all. 

Tony sighs. “So what’s in it for us to help you? Wouldn’t it be in  _ our  _ best interests if we just left? If we leave before your boss learns that we found you guys, then he has no reason to kill us or Loki.” 

Gamora bites her lip. “You aren’t wrong. That would be the simplest solution. And certainly the safest one for yourselves.” She glances at the ground, looking less in control than before. When she raises her eyes, she looks almost pleading. “But if you care about Loki even a little bit, then you’ll help me. He’s entrenched in this. He needs out just as badly as I do, even if he doesn’t know it.” She composes herself a bit, reigning in emotion. “Besides, if I’m going to take down our organization, I’m going to need his help. And don’t you guys want the same? To take down the people that did this to you? This is your chance to avenge the lives you lost.” 

Thor’s heart constricts. He’s not sure whether Gamora’s words are genuine or meant to manipulate, but either way they’re working. The thought of Loki being indoctrinated into a criminal organization by a sadistic tyrant makes Thor want to burn the world down to get him out. The fact that Loki hasn’t turned them in yet is enough to give him hope that they might even succeed in getting him to switch sides. Thor already knows what his answer is, regardless of what the others choose. “I’ll do it.”

The other three people in the room all give him shocked looks. Brunnhilde sputters. “Just like that?” 

Thor nods. “Like I said before, there isn’t another option for me.”

Brunnhilde watches him for a long moment. Then she lets out an explosive breath. “Fine! Fine, I’ll help.” 

Thor is astounded that she’s so quick to agree. “Really?”

“Yes, really. I can’t just let you go and get yourself killed. Besides, revenge is sounding pretty good to me.” 

They turn to their third partner. “Tony?” 

The man fidgets, not meeting their eyes. “I don’t know guys, this seems pretty big. And I’m finally starting to get over what happened to me, just starting to believe that I could have a life again. It was one thing to hang around and give Loki a bit of hell, but taking down an entire organization?” 

Thor tries to think of an argument that might convince Tony. He’ll respect the man’s choice if he decides that he truly doesn’t want to get involved, but Thor will certainly feel better going into this if they have Tony Stark on their side. “Think of all the people we’ll be sparing from the same fate we faced. If you don’t do it for revenge or for Loki, do it for the future victims of this organization.” 

Tony gives him a look that tells Thor he knows exactly what he’s trying to do. Thor can’t bring himself to feel guilty. After several long moments, Tony pushes out a sharp breath. “Ugh, fine. I’ll help too.” 

Gamora smiles. “I’m glad to hear it.” 

*******

Loki is bored. He knows he should be feeling satisfied, but he’s just bored. 

After tasking Bucky with getting rid of the menaces three, he gets dragged into singing karaoke with En Dwi and then gets caught up in a dance line with a bunch of drunken engineers. By the time Bucky finally slips back into the party, Loki has nearly decided that dealing with his ex-marks would be preferable to his current situation. 

Bucky gives him a significant look from across the room. It’s difficult to interpret, due to being across the damn room. Loki’s got En Dwi hanging all over him, though, so he can’t get Bucky alone to ask him how exactly it went. He assumes the look to mean that Bucky has accomplished what Loki asked him to do. The other three did not return with him, after all.

The satisfaction sets in for about five minutes before Loki realizes he’s back to suffering his way through this party with no greater goal than further endearing himself to En Dwi. After the whirlwind of thwarting the menaces three at every turn, playing sugar baby Lucky now feels quite boring. 

But alas, Loki made his bed and now he has no choice but to lie in it. Although, he’s hoping that he can get En Dwi out of that bed as soon as possible. Loki’s had quite enough of those silicone tentacles the man is so fond of. 

The next time Loki catches sight of Bucky, the man gives him another significant look. This time Loki is less certain that the meaning is ‘Yep, did everything you asked, boss. No problem here!’

He tells En Dwi that he needs the bathroom and gives Bucky a significant look of his own as he strides out of the room. Being the smart boy he is, Bucky follows. Loki takes a sharp turn and veers off into the master suite. Bucky enters moments later, closing the door behind him. 

“So? Are they gone?”

Bucky’s face creases into that same look from earlier. Up close it’s much easier to decipher. 

“You  _ didn’t _ ?” Loki hisses. He ignores the miniscule thrill of anticipation in favor of the far more manageable anger. 

“I cornered them on the sixth floor, as you instructed. I threatened them when they refused to tell me anything and showed no intent to leave. I was making progress. But Gamora intervened,” Bucky reports seriously. 

Loki’s blood turns to ice. “No.” He feels the wall catch him. Ah, apparently his knees have stopped working. 

Bucky steps forward, looking concerned. He stops short of touching Loki. Smart boy. He hesitates before speaking again. “I know you told me not to tell her. She found us while searching the premises for the gem.”

Loki shakes his head, eyes on the floor. No. No, Gamora cannot know. If she knows, then she will report it to Thanos. 

Thor will die.

“Loki, are you okay?”

Loki jerks his head up, nearly hitting Bucky’s nose in the process. Damn, when did he get that close? “Where are they? Has she reported them yet?” Maybe he’s not too late. 

Bucky steps back out of the danger zone. “I left them all on the sixth floor. I don’t know what she intended to do.” 

Loki pushes off the wall, and pushes past Bucky and out the door. He doesn’t stop running even as he sprints through crowds of dancers and past people calling his fake name. He only stops once the elevator doors are closing, Bucky just barely making it in behind him. They ride in silence down to the sixth floor. Loki’s breaths sound terribly harsh in the small space. 

As soon as the doors ding open, Loki is running again. He runs around the entire pool, into the bathroom, the storage area. Bucky is saying something but he can’t hear what it is over the loud pounding in his head. He finally stops, hands on his knees, lungs aching, eyes wild. 

He’s too late. 

  
  



	34. Promise Me

Apparently Garmora is posing as En Dwi’s chauffeur, which means she isn’t needed tonight, seeing as the party is taking place in En Dwi’s ‘house’. The only reason she was here in the first place was to snoop around the empty floors of the building while everyone was occupied with the party. They decide to all leave and meet back up at the motel where Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde are staying. 

Gamora gets to the motel before they do. She lets herself in. Thor notes it didn’t take her an entire hour to pick the lock, like it had Brunnhilde in New York. Bunnhilde punches him for pointing it out. They all crowd into the small room. There’s only one chair, which Gamora’s already claimed. That leaves the other three to spread out on the bed and floor. 

Gamora explains to them that she, Loki, and Bucky are part of an organization called the Black Order. Thanos, the head of the Order, is indeed after illegal technology, just as they’d suspected. Apparently he’s been after six items in particular, which Gamora refers to as the ‘Gems’. Individually, they’re called the Tesseract, the Aether, the Scepter, the Eye, the Orb, and the Soul. They are each advanced AI computers, far beyond most current technology. Whoever created the Gems designed them to give certain companies a leg up by eliminating the competition, leaving one company to prevail over the others. Each Gem has a different capability specifically programed for sabotaging the competitors of the company using it. 

The Tesseract hacks into firewalls and scans specifically for sensitive information on competitor company personnel that could cause a scandal if it were made public. The Scepter allows you to siphon money from other companies. The Eye is able to examine all of the information stored within a company’s computer systems and use it to calculate the best approach to thwarting their future growth. The Orb collects all customer or client information from competing companies and reports it to the user so that they can undermine and steal those client bases. The Aether doesn’t obtain any information for the user, it just erases the hard drives of other companies’ computer systems. The Soul has the ability to hack into all of the other gems in order to control and amplify them. Or so they believe. This is the only one they’ve not yet been able to verify. 

Thanos’s ultimate goal is to “bring balance” to the global economy. In other words, take half the money from every company in the world. He believes that by doing this it will knock all the giant business down to size. Except that he will be taking money from every company, not just the big ones. Every mom-and-pop small business will lose half of their funds. And he intends to keep all the stolen money for himself.

In order to accomplish this, he must have all the gems and use the Soul to amplify and harness them. If they are correct about what the Soul does, it should be able to control all the gems remotely. However, Thanos is insistent upon having all of them within his possession. He will not risk leaving anyone else with the advantage of owning even one of the gems. He also seems to have reason to believe that having all the gems in one place will make them far more powerful. 

Thanos first learned of the Gems’ existence eight years ago. Before that, he sought other high price illegal items. But since he learned of the stones, they’ve become his obsession. He spent years gathering information on them and sending the members of his Order on missions with the singular objective of discovering the locations of the Gems. They managed to confirm which companies had each of the Gems, save the Soul. 

Loki, as Thanos’s favored field agent, was selected to be the one responsible for obtaining the Gems. Meanwhile, Gamora and the others were demoted to support roles meant to assist Loki in his assignments. They’ve been quite successful, having obtained all of the Gems, save the Soul, which they have been unable to locate. Thanos suspects that En Dwi knows something about the location of the final Gem. He may even be in possession of it. Loki’s current assignment is to obtain any information about the Soul that En Dwi has. 

Amongst the Black Order, every agent is given a codename inspired by their accomplishments, performances, or origins. Gamora is known as Requiem. Bucky is the Winter Soldier. Loki, however, has accumulated several of these names throughout his time with the Order. Each of his various jobs and accomplishments are credited to one of three identities: the God of Lies, Master of Mischief, and Trickster, respectively. There are few within the Order that know him to be all three. Gamora doesn’t really know why. She suspects it’s just Loki’s flare for the dramatic. 

Loki is the protege of an agent called the Black Widow. The two of them are the two most accomplished con artists that Thanos has ever had. They both made their names by running cons revolving around gaining people’s trust and access to their entire lives by marrying them. Who is a person more desperate to trust than their newlywed spouse? And who has more access to a person’s life than their partner? 

Loki learned this skill from the Black Widow and it is what earned him his current role as Thanos’s head field agent. The Black Widow herself is now excommunicated from the Order. Or at least, that’s what Thanos tells people. In reality, the Black Widow and another agent called Hawkeye betrayed Thanos, left the Order, and then hid somewhere even Thanos couldn’t find them. Had he been able to, they would be dead. 

Gamora, however, does know where they are. She kept in contact with them after they left and is now asking for their help in this endeavor to overthrow Thanos once and for all. Apparently, the Black Widow has agreed to help on the condition that Loki is on their side. She does not wish to see him brought to kneel before the law once they turn Thanos over to the authorities. She also claims that Loki is too great of an asset to attempt this plan without. Gamora had already intended to attempt winning Loki over, but her agreement with the Black Widow has made it a vital element of the plan. 

That’s where Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde come in. Gamora, for some reason Thor is really not sure of, thinks they are the key to convincing Loki to switch sides. She wants them to continue the con they started, Thor playing Lucky’s brother Donald, Brunnhilde playing the girlfriend Val, and Tony playing the best friend Tom. They will use this to keep getting close to Loki, giving them opportunities to win him over. 

Gamora has already proposed to Loki that they could rebel against Thanos, leave like the Black Widow and Hawkeye. He hadn’t even let her finish two sentences before pointing a knife to her spleen. However, he is yet to tell Thanos of Gamora’s blasphemous words. Just as he is yet to report Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde’s interference in the current job. That is enough to give Gamora hope that he is not completely out of their reach. Thor is inclined to agree.

The first step in the rebellion will be getting to the Soul gem before Thanos can get his hands on it. This will of course be much easier if they have Loki’s help. If they can’t get Loki to switch sides, this will mean having to thwart his efforts and beat him to it. 

Assuming they are correct about what the Soul does, then with it they should be able to control all of the gems in Thanos’s grasp. This will allow them to redirect the effects of the other five stones to target Thanos, taking all of his money, scanning for useful information, and wiping his computer systems. From there, they can use the information the gems gathered to get Thanos arrested without leaving any evidence implicating the members of the Black Order who helped to bring Thanos down. 

*******

Loki has locked himself away in En Dwi’s master suite. He knows himself to be a coward.

By the time he and Bucky made it to the sixth floor, Gamora and the others were gone. After sending Bucky to check every floor of the building and checking the street outside himself, Loki confirmed that they are no longer on the premises. Which could only logically mean that Gamora escorted Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde out of the building at gunpoint and promptly called Daddy for garbage removal. 

But it’s been too long. Something should have happened by now. Loki has yet to receive a phone call from Thanos or a gun to his own head. That can only mean one thing. 

Gamora isn’t going to turn them in. 

Bucky walks into the master suite and sits next to Loki on the bed. “I told En Dwi that you are sleeping off the booze.”

Loki nods absently. “Good, good.” 

Why wouldn’t Gamora turn them in? Loki thought she was over her rebellious phase. She hasn’t mentioned a desire to betray Daddy in years. But he shouldn’t be surprised. It seems no one can be trusted. They all leave eventually. 

Loki shakes his head, warding off the ache settling there. He looks over at Bucky. Loyal Bucky. “Promise me.”

Bucky tilts his head. “Yes. What am I promising?”

Loki gulps a breath. “Promise me that you’ll always be on my side.” 

Bucky smiles and cups Loki’s cheek. “I will always be on your side. I promise.”

Loki nods again. “Good.”

  
  



	35. 1:23 AM

It’s a lot of information to absorb. Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde all take some time to process before interrupting the quiet that Gamora has allowed to settle over the room. 

“So Thanos wants to take half the money from every company? In the whole world?” Tony boggles.

Gamora nods. 

“Well, I mean, a lot of those companies would still be rich as hell if you took half of their money.” Tony shrugs. “It’s kind of a Robin Hood sort of move, really.” 

Brunnhilde scoffs. “Yeah, but Robin Hood only stole from the rich and gave to the poor. Thanos is stealing from everybody and keeping it for his own pompous self. Right?” She looks to Gamora, who nods again. “See? Totally different. Besides, it wouldn’t bring balance at all. It would probably throw the world economy into turmoil.”

“She is correct,” Gamora confirms. “Daddy - Thanos - is unable to see reality. He thinks what he’s doing will save the world. But I do not believe this is the way to do it.” 

Thor tries to focus on this important discussion of wide scale impact, but his mind keeps returning to a specific question regarding Loki’s past. There’s one thing Gamora hasn’t told them that he really wants to know the answer to. 

“How exactly did Loki come to work for this Thanos?” What he truly wants to ask is  _ why _ .

Gamora seems surprised by his question. “I don’t know. I always assumed he was an orphan that Thanos took in. That’s what happened with most of us.”

Bile rises in Thor’s throat. “What, you mean as children? You didn’t join the Order as adults?” 

Gamora seems untroubled by his shock. “No, he mostly takes in children. All the better to mold us into what he wants, I suppose.”

“That sounds like a damn cult,” Tony baulks.“So Thanos actually raised you?”

“Yeah, since I was 11. He found me picking pockets on the street in Louisiana.” 

“Wait, that doesn’t line up,” Brunnhilde says. “Loki isn’t an orphan.” 

Gamora blinks curiously. “How do you know?”

“That’s how we tracked him down,” Brunnhilde explains. “We figured out he was from Hammerfest, Norway, flew there to visit his childhood home, and followed the clues all the way to Miami.”

“Well, I’ll be.” Gamora looks a little wide eyed. “I’m impressed you managed to track him so far. Even I didn’t know that about him. I’m glad to have you on my team.”

Tony preens. “Yeah, we’re essentially heroes.” Brunnhilde rolls her eyes. Gamora chuckles. It’s the most human sound Thor’s heard her make. 

Brunnhilde cocks her head. “Well, his parents may not be dead, but  _ they _ think  _ he _ is.”

Gamora’s brow crinkles in a quizative frown. “What do you mean?”

“Everyone from his old life thinks he’s dead,” Brunnhilde clarifies. “He disappeared when he was a kid and left a pool of blood behind. We assumed he faked his own death.” 

Tony snaps his fingers. “I bet Loki faked her death and ran away to live a life of crime on the street. And then Thanos found her and adopted her.”

Gamora looks considering. “When did Loki disappear?”

Thor thinks back to that haunting yearbook memoriam. “On October 14, 2005. He was 12 years old.”

Gamora frowns. “He joined the Black Order around that same time.” 

Tony looks thoughtful. “Well, I suppose it’s possible that Thanos just found Loki right after she ran away. But there’s also the fact that Loki’s dad’s company was broken into on the same day she disappeared.” 

“Which company?” Gamora asks.

“Jotunheim,” Thor provides. 

“It doesn’t sound familiar but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t one that Thanos targeted. I don’t know every company he’s ever robbed.”

“So it’s possible that Thanos is the one who brought down Loki’s dad’s company,” Tony says. “What if Loki really was kidnapped? By Thanos?”

“I doubt it,” Gamora says. “For all his faults, I’ve never known Thanos to actually force someone to join the Order. He wants people who have nothing to lose. That’s why he adopts orphans. No one will miss them and they will be eternally grateful to him for giving them a life outside of an orphanage, foster home, or the street. He raises us to see him as our father. It fosters loyalty.” 

Thor clears his throat awkwardly. “Is that why you call him--?”

“Daddy? Yes. Since I was 11, he’s been my father. I lived with him until I began going out on jobs. He made me breakfast in the morning and tucked me in at night. He homeschooled me, rewarded me when I got good grades, and punished me for slacking on chores.”

“And you’re really willing to just turn on him?” Brunnhilde asks, not unkindly. “Your father?” 

Gamora dips her head in a tight nod. “Just because I have loved him as a parent does not mean I can overlook his sins as a man.” 

None of them can argue with that. 

“But Loki doesn’t agree with you?” Thor asks sadly. 

Gamora simply answers, “No.”

Tony scratches his chin. “So you were already with Thanos when Loki joined. Why weren’t you told where she came from?”

“I didn’t meet Loki until he’d already been with Thanos for a few months. I would have been 17, I had my own assignments by that point. I think I was working a con in Dublin at the time.” 

“You were doing jobs like this when you were just 17?” Thor asks, mortified. That’s far too young for a person to be doing such dangerous things. Not only did Thanos indoctrinate children, he had minors working as con artists. 

Gamora just shrugs, though. “I started going out in the field when I was 16. Loki was just 14 when he had his first assignment.” 

Thor feels ill. “You don’t mean--”

“Yeah,” Gamora says. “He was married for the first time at 14 years old.”

This time Thor can’t hold it in. He barely makes it to the bathroom before he’s vomiting up the entire contents of his stomach. 

After the puking episode, Gamora decides it’s time to call it a night. “I think you’ve had enough new information dumped on you for one day.” She leaves them with the promise that she will contact them again tomorrow to continue their discussions. 

“Well geez. Guess I can’t call Loki ‘Ocean’s One’ anymore,” Tony pouts. “She’s not just one, but part of a whole group of con artists.”

Brunnhilde and Thor ignore Tony’s bemoaning. It’s clear he needs to distract himself from the reality of the situation with humor. They leave him to it and both climb into the one bed. 

Thor quickly determines that he won’t be sleeping anytime soon. He can’t get his mind off the image of a 14 year old Loki seducing some businessman. Of 14 year old Loki having sex with a full grown adult. 14 year old Loki getting married. 

The fact that he was participating in cons, operating in a criminal organization, and marrying adults before he reached the age of consent means one thing to Thor: all of that falls under ‘non consensual’. 

*******

Gamora walks into her temporary Miami apartment. It’s 1:23am. And Loki is tired of waiting. 

He flicks on the lamp next to the armchair in which he sits. “Someone’s been out late.”

Gamora doesn’t look surprised to find him there. “Loki. To what do I owe this visit?” The room is still dark aside from the dull glow of the lamp. Her face is hung in deep shadows. 

Loki stands. “What did you do?” 

Gamora steps closer, allowing the lamplight to touch the top plains of her somber face. “That is a broad question.” 

“Gamora. You didn’t report them to Daddy. So I repeat. What. Did. You. Do?”

She regards him in unmoving silence for far too long. When she speaks, it sounds like ice cracking. “I offered them a deal.” 

Loki feels his veins constrict with the immense effort to breathe evenly. He only has a whisper of a voice to offer. “And did they accept?”

Gamora opens her mouth to respond, but the way her face twists in pity tells him the answer before she can utter so much as a word. He’s out the door before she reaches the third syllable. 

“Yes, they--"

  
  



	36. Traitorous Hope

The next day, Gamora knocks on their motel door. She brings bagels. She also informs them that they’ll be moving to a better hotel, where she will be paying their expenses. They don’t bother attempting to reject her help. They need it. And besides, she is part of the reason none of them have any money. 

After eating, they check out of the motel and Gamora drives them to their new hotel. It’s far more spacious and boasts three beds along with a seating area with more than one chair. Then they get down to business. 

“So, today I wanted to discuss the specifics of how you’re going to get through to Loki,” Gamora starts. 

“Oh, good,” Tony cuts in. “Cause I’ve been wondering how exactly you expect us to do that. She hasn’t been terribly receptive so far.” 

Gamora inclines her head. “And I’m afraid it probably won’t be any easier going forward. However, I know Loki pretty well and I’ve gotten to observe how he interacts with each of you. There are always two other members assigned to assist Loki on each of his jobs. I’ve been assigned to all of Loki’s jobs that involve the gems. That includes the three of yours. For each one I was given an undercover role. Thor, as you know, I was a custodian at Asgard. And Brunnhilde, I was your neighbor. Tony, I was your barista. You may not remember, though, I mostly just saw your intern.”

Tony laughs sheepishly. “Hey, I’m not the only one with a shit memory, apparently. What about Bucky? Neither Thor nor Brunnhilde remember him.”

Gamora shakes her head. “Loki recruited Bucky while on the Stark job. Or, yours, I guess.” She sends an apologetic look Tony’s way. “He only joined the Black Order after Loki stole the Scepter from you. He’s been following Loki around like a puppy ever since. But during the jobs conning Thor and Brunnhilde, Bucky was at headquarters getting trained. ”

Thor frowns. Loki recruited Bucky? Why would he do that? Was there something about Bucky that made him want to keep him around? As stupid as he knows it to be, Thor actually feels kind of hurt that Loki decided to recruit Bucky and not him. 

“So that little fucker did betray me! After everything I did for him” Tony grimaces. “Shit, Steve won’t be happy about this.” 

Gamora sighs. “Anyway, working so closely with Loki gave me a lot of opportunities to analyze him. The Black Widow tasked me with recruiting Loki over three years ago. Since then, I’ve been studying him to figure out how to do it. In doing so, I’ve learned a lot about his strengths and weaknesses. He is an actor, yes, but his main skill is in knowing how to become exactly what a person wants. That’s how he got all of you, three very different people, to fall in love with him.” 

Gamora pauses and works her jaw for a moment, a considering look on her face. “Thor, Loki seemed different with you. He’s usually the perfect con. He is always relaxed and confident, reads people like children’s books. But with you he was thrown off his course. He was out of whack. He was constantly frustrated and on edge.” 

Thor was sure his heart had run out of traitorous hope to be smashed, but apparently not. The idea had lingered that maybe the reason Loki had been different with him was because he’d simply been comfortable around Thor. But Gamora’s words support Tony and Brunnhilde’s theory: Loki hates him. 

Gamora seems to notice Thor’s sudden depression. She hurries to continue. “I just mean, for some reason, I think he had a hard time lying to you. Like, he kept breaking character. I could never figure out if he particularly liked or disliked you, though. It’s difficult to tell with Loki. Both would make him irritable. He tries to smother his emotions and the stronger they are, the more effort they keep to suppress. Positive or negative, I’m pretty sure he’s got strong feelings toward you though. And that makes him vulnerable. Either way, I think you’re our best shot at breaking down his defenses.”

“I noticed the same thing, I think. At the party when I yelled at him,” Thor ignores the surprised looks at that, “he seemed really upset. And later, when he yelled at me. He’d been cold and impenetrable the whole night, but at those moments he did seem more, I don’t know, honest in his anger.” 

Thor hears a snort from Tony. He sends a glare the shorter man’s way, frustrated at his own sloppy explanation. 

Gamora looks intrigued, though. “What about before, when he was Luke? Did you notice anything similar then?”

“Um, yeah. But only really when I was first getting to know him. Initially he was always so cool and classy. But there were times where something else would show through. I kind of thought of it like a mask with cracks in it. I liked what I saw underneath and so I tried to make more and more cracks in the mask. Eventually, I was pretty sure the mask was almost entirely gone.” Thor gives a humorless laugh. “Guess I was sort of wrong about that, huh?”

Gamora hums. “That depends. Whether because he reevaluated your preferences or another reason, from what I saw he definitely strayed from the persona he planned for you. Luke was supposed to be proper, pleasant, and submissive.” 

Thor coughs. “He uh, he definitely wasn’t any of those things.” He sends another glare his friends’ way when Brunnhilde and Tony giggle. “At least, not once I’d really gotten to know him.”

“So what was he like instead?”

“Exciting, I guess. Wickedly smart. Sharp tongued. Oftentimes rather baffling.”

Gamora grins. “I’m guessing we can add bitchy to that list. Yep, that sounds like Loki.”

“So what does that mean?” Brunnhilde interjects. 

“I’m not sure.” Gamora worries her lip. “But it does seem like Thor got Loki to, at least partially, drop character.” She looks back to Thor. “You said you made it a goal to make cracks in his mask. How did you do that? What did you do to get through his shields?”

“I don’t know. I guess I just needled and annoyed him. Like, a lot.” 

“Most people annoy him,” Gamora scoffs. “There must have been something else.” 

“I don’t know. I was just me.” 

Gamora regards him in silence for a long moment. “Okay, then your strategy for getting through to him now will be the same. Just be you.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Loki will be meeting face to face again next chapter!!! This is the end of the information dump :3


	37. Disastrous Dining

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Loki come face to face once more! This time, it's over dinner.

The lighting is but a soft glow of candles that adorn spindling candelabras. Thick velvet drapes in undulating waves over doorways and window frames. The heady scents of fine wine and cream swirl together in an enticing embrace. Each and every detail is attuned to romance. 

The man across from him fits into the scene perfectly as he twirls pasta around a delicate fork with blue manicured hands. As En Dwi closes his lips around the bite, Loki admires the way the long pasta drags along his chin. It leaves a trail of bold red that shines in the low light. He imagines taking the fork from those painted fingers and feeding En Dwi a bite of carefully twirled pasta, slipping it past his full lips, into the chasm of his mouth, and stabbing it through the flesh of his throat. Oh, the red that would spill down his chin then. It would shine so brightly in the sickeningly romantic light. 

“En, I feel so fancy. If my family had taken me to places like this, maybe I wouldn’t have run off.” 

En Dwi lifts a curious brow. “You mean that, uh, brother of yours never took you to a snazzy tazzy restaurant?” 

Loki’s gut clenches. Shit. “No, why would he?” 

“Mm, well, Pet. I know thinking isn’t your strong suit, but, uh, surely you recognize what - what certain behavior means. You know,” here En Dwi begins making lecherous purring sounds. 

Loki forces a petulant huff past his internal screaming. “En, I don’t know what that means.”

“Oh, come Lucky boy. You must have--” 

“Lucky! En Dwi! How nice to run into you.” 

Loki feels his entire spine straighten, vertebrae by vertebrae. No. It couldn’t be. 

But of course it is. He turns to find Thor standing with Brunnhilde and Tony in tow just behind his chair. They’re all wearing clothing that’s about two degrees too casual for the restaurant. 

“Brother,” Loki says on a curl of his lip. “What a surprise. I wouldn’t have thought you could afford such an establishment.” He can admit to himself it’s a rather low blow, considering. 

With a hearty laugh devoid of offense, Thor claps him on the back hard enough that Loki has to slam a hand on the table to avoid face planting in his bisque. 

“But Brother, you of all people should know what I can afford. You got to reap the benefits of it more than anyone.” There’s a hidden bite to the words that would be undetectable to someone who doesn’t know what Thor sounds like when he’s being genuine. 

“Ah, so you did take our Lucky boy here to some, ah, faaancy establishments.” En Dwi appears to be a disturbing mixture of smug, horny, and challenging. 

Thor appears to be entirely oblivious to the mayhem he’s about to cause. “Why yes, often in fact. He quite nearly ran me broke!” Thor’s following laugh is too loud and forceful for the setting. 

“Darling,” Bunnhilde starts, with obvious strain, “Perhaps we should find a table.” 

Loki hurriedly voices his agreement. “Yes, you’re clearly quite tired. Get off your feet.”

“So nice of you to invite us to join,” Tony beams. “We accept.”

Horror swarms Loki’s mind. “No, I didn’t mean--” 

“Of course, join us, join us”, En Dwi cuts him off. “Mmm, plenty of room.” He gives Loki a look full of pure ‘I told you so’ as Thor hastily claims the chair next to Loki. Brunnhilde sits next to En Dwi and Tony steals a chair from the table of a kissing couple, startling them apart. 

“So, Donald,” En Dwi drawls, “quite the quirky coincidence running into your band of misfits here.” He smiles somewhere close to pleasantly. 

“A coincidence indeed!” Thor booms. “But then, I did always have quite a sense for locating Lucky.” He claps Loki on the back, a private emphasis on the subtext to his comment. The hand lingers. Loki shakes it off irritably. 

“My, Lucky truly is a lucky boy to have such a,” mocking, lecherous purr, “devoted brother.” En Dwi wiggles his eyebrows at Loki, as though the others can’t see them. “Don’t worry, I’m tempted to - to stalk that cute little butt myself sometimes.” 

There’s an awkward silence.

“Oh! But I suppose I don’t have to. Mm, seeing as said butt basically lives on my lap.” En Dwi laughs as though the rest of the table is joining in. “Ahem, so really, Donald. What brings you and your little, ah, ah, friend-ees here tonight?” 

Thor shifts, looking extremely out of his element. Loki allows himself to feel bad for him for a moment before resolving that it serves him right for getting in the way of this operation. 

Brunnhilde answers in Thor’s stead. “We’re celebrating our anniversary.” 

En Dwi’s eyes slowly drag over to Tony beside her. He raises a brow. 

“Oh, I, uh - I introduced them,” Tony stumbles. “So I get to tag along. Being the one who brought them together. And all that.” 

En Dwi lets it go but gives Loki another slow, pointed blink. 

Luckily, their server returns to take the rest of their orders at that moment. As Thor, Brunnhilde, and Tony make their selections, Loki quickly slurps down the rest of his bisque. He then turns to En Dwi.

“En, I’ve finished. It looks like you’re about done too. And we wanted to get to that thing. Remember?” 

En Dwi smiles amusedly. “Mm, aww, Pet. Something making you uncomfortable?”

Loki morphs his instinctive death glare into a petulant pout at the last moment. “Eeeennn.”

En Dwi chuckles as Tony interjects, “Really, trying to run off just after we got here? I have a thought to be offended.” 

Loki suppresses another glare. “Oh, no. Nothing like that. We just have a prior commitment that we need to get to.” 

Brunnhilde smirks and asks, “What exactly is this ‘prior commitment’?”

Loki feels his eyebrow twitch, his forced smile stretching at the seams. “We’re going to a nightclub.” 

Thor’s face lights up. “We will join you! I’m sure they’ll let us take our food to go. I wasn’t all that hungry anyway.” 

A snarled “No,” escapes Loki’s lips before he can stop it. 

Everyone at the table looks at him in surprise. Especially En Dwi. Loki kicks himself. Lucky isn’t meant to have a temper. En Dwi has never seen him truly angry before. 

“I just meant, it’s not really your kind of place,” Loki corrects himself. 

“Nonsense. We love clubbing, don’t we, buddy?” Tony says with a friendly elbow to Thor’s side. 

Thor looks less offended by Loki’s violent refusal and more thoughtful. Loki doesn’t like it. “Yes, indeed. We are kings of the club.” 

Loki appreciates Brunnhilde rolling her eyes so he doesn’t have to. 

  
  



	38. Appropriate Dress

En Dwi insists that Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde join he and Loki in their personal limo, declaring they’ve never experienced a vehicle like it. Little does he know that Gamora drove the three of them to the restaurant in this very same vehicle not 30 minutes ago. 

Korg, Topaz, Bucky, Bruce, and three other people Thor doesn’t recognize are already inside the limousine when Gamora pulls up to the restaurant. There’s more than enough room for everyone.

As soon as they pull away from the curb, En Dwi and Loki both remove their suit jackets and begin unbuttoning their shirts. Tony leans over and whispers to Thor and Brunnihlde, “We didn’t just unknowingly sign up for an orgy inside a moving vehicle did we?”

But as Loki’s fingers reach the sixth button down from his collar, instead of more pale skin being revealed, tight blue leather comes into view. He’s wearing a deep V-neck leather tank top underneath his suit. It leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. Thor flushes and looks away, feeling oddly guilty for looking. He notices En Dwi has a similar yellow leather garment. Both men start in on removing their slacks next, revealing matching skin-tight leather pants. 

Thor looks around and realizes that the rest of the people in the limo with them are all wearing similarly garish outfits. He looks down at his own cheap slacks and button up (bought with the last dregs of their money) and feels, absurdly, to be the one dressed oddly. 

Gamora parks the limousine and they all climb out onto a busy street in front of an even busier nightclub. Neon lights stream from every inch of the building, every person passing through the doors is dressed in obscenely bright colors, and bass-heavy music pounds loud enough to vibrate the sidewalk under their feet. It looks like something out of what Thor imagines En Dwi’s wet dreams look like. 

Bruce falls into step beside Thor. “Mr. Gast owns this place. If you couldn’t tell.”

“Yeah, I don’t think I can picture anyone else creating something quite this--” 

“Gaudy?” Bruce provides.

Thor laughs. He likes Bruce. 

En Dwi leads them all to the front of the queue and the bouncers immediately shove people aside to let their entire group in. Those who were pushed aside cease protesting the moment they notice who it was they just let pass. Thor scoffs. En Dwi certainly has cultivated his celebrity status in this town. 

They enter into a space reminiscent of the Globe Theater. Except more neon. From the front door, they enter onto a balcony that wraps around the circumference of the large circular space. A room the size of a stadium lies below them. En Dwi leads them down a long set of stairs that lands them on the main level, well below the surface of the ground. Extending around the outside of half the circular room is a long white bar with neon lights lining the curved edges. The other half of the outside wall is lined with white leather booths, also edged with neon lights. The entire inside of the circle is a dance floor, roughly the size of a gymnasium. The balcony that they entered onto circles the entire space, at least 40 feet above their heads, and is lined with tables. 

Colorfully dressed people swarm every part of the space. 

En Dwi turns and tugs on Thor’s sleeve. He leans in uncomfortably close to shout over the music. “Come!” 

Thor obediently follows, Tony and Brunnhilde in their wake. En Dwi leads them to a door set just behind the bar. He opens it and steps aside, making a shooing gesture with his hand to indicate that they go inside. As soon as all three of them are in, En Dwi smiles and walks away, letting the door swing shut behind him. 

They all blink at each other. “Did that psycho just lock us up?” Brunnhilde asks rather bewilderedly. They turn to examine the space. It appears to be an extremely large closet full of neon leather clothing. With a sinking feeling, Thor realizes why En Dwi put them in here. 

*******

Loki hates En Dwi’s nightclub. It feels like being in a crashing spaceship where no one cares that they’re about to die a fiery death. Actually, if given the choice, Loki would take the fiery death. 

And having the menaces three here just makes it oh so much worse. It feels like the birthday party all over again. Then again, Loki supposes this is better than being stuck at a table with nothing to do but let En Dwi and the menances speak to each other, revealing who knows what. At least here conversation is unlikely to be achieved. Yes, this is far better than the restaurant. 

Loki amends his assessment when Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde exit the emergency closet (used for when patrons do not arrive in the ‘appropriate’ dress). This night will be the death of him. Thor is wearing tight black leather pants paired with a top that hugs his muscled torso in bright red leather and encases his enormous arms with chrome silver beads. The outfit is ridiculous and Loki is certain Thor is the only person who could make it look so mouthwatering. 

Brunnhilde and Tony are dressed similarly, although they do indeed look just as ridiculous as everyone else there who isn’t Thor. Brunnhilde is in a set of white leather pants and tank top with yellow accents. She reminds Loki a bit of a lemon meringue pie. Tony is wearing a shiny red and gold windbreaker over a blue top and red leather pants. The color combination hurts Loki’s eyes. 

Bruce intercepts the three of them, sparking up a conversation. Loki huffs. It figures those menaces would snatch up the one person worth talking to in this joint. Thor though, looks rather uninterested in what Bruce is saying. Instead of listening, he’s looking around, searching. For Loki, presumably. 

Loki supposes he should decide rather quickly whether to let himself be found or to make a hasty getaway. To no one’s surprise more than his own, Loki chooses to be found. 

  
  



	39. Dance with the Devil

It doesn’t take Thor long to find Loki. He’s leaning back against the bar in a quieter part of the club, staring Thor down over the umbrella of his hot pink cocktail. 

Thor walks away from the conversation with Bruce and the others without a thought. He approaches Loki slower than he wishes to, meandering and weaving through dancers but always keeping his eyes on his goal. Like approaching a wild animal.

When he’s finally standing before Loki without any other bodies separating them, Thor looks his fill. Loki looks beautiful, of course. He also looks like he’s sucking on a lemon. Thor can’t help but smile. That’s the man he knows. 

Loki scoffs. “What are you smiling about?”

“I missed you.” 

Loki frowns. “You missed Luke.” 

“I missed my husband.” 

“Your husband was a lie.” 

“My husband was you.” 

Loki’s frown deepens then morphs into smirk. “Oh really?” He pushes off the bar and walks forward until his nose is mere inches from Thor’s. “Would your husband have done this?” He downs his drink, walks around Thor, and swaggers onto the dance floor. The tight blue leather makes every mundane move of his body look like sin. 

Thor is hypnotized, helpless to do anything but watch and pant as Loki starts up a serpentine dance that should require at least one pole. He twists and writhes in a truly obscene manner. Thor’s feet are carrying him out onto the dance floor before he has the sense to stop them. 

Loki locks his eyes with Thor’s as he approaches. He doesn’t stop ungelating. Thor thoughtlessly and effortlessly shoves aside the dancing bodies that have taken an interest in the dark haired dancer and gotten too close. He takes up the space across from Loki, dancing to the intense beat. Their eyes bore into each other. 

Loki slithers close, breathes into Thor’s face, “Would  _ Luke _ ,” he spits the name, “have danced so shamelessly?”

Thor thinks back to the night so long ago in that London bar, the first time Luke - Loki - had gone out with Thor’s friends. They had danced then. Loki had been so reluctant to step onto the dance floor. Thor had refused other dance partners that night in hopes that Loki would join him instead. Finally, finally he had. And he’d chosen the space directly next to Thor. 

Thor had been quite drunk, but he remembers the way Loki moved. It had been sensual, yes, but controlled. Calculated, now he thinks. Looking back on it, Thor realizes Loki hadn’t danced for fun that night, but for a purpose. To seduce Thor, his mark. Loki, when Thor knew him as Luke, had not danced again in all the time he knew him. Well, except at their wedding. 

Would Luke have danced like this? 

“No,” he admits. And takes a chance. “But neither would Loki.” 

There’s a stall in Loki’s dance, barely a beat. But there. “I do believe you have contrary evidence in front of your eyes.”

Thor shakes his head. “That is how Lucky dances.” He smiles. “But Loki’s still there all the while.” 

Loki’s dance grows raunchier. “Are you quite sure about that?”

Thor grins at the challenge. “I can do it too, see? Watch how Donald dances.” He transitions into a pelvis heavy dance, pushing his butt out and and flexing his arms as he lifts them over his head. 

Thor thrills as he watches Loki’s eyes darken and move closer to him simultaneously as Loki pushes forward to dance nose to nose with him. It takes everything he has to keep dancing instead of grabbing Loki up in a hug. 

Their dance is a duel. Each time one of them takes it up a notch, the other turns it up two more. Before too long, they’re both breathing hard and sweat is beading on their brows. Thor can see Loki’s pulse pounding in his throat and it makes him ravenous. 

He’s not had a single drink but he feels drunk. 

Then his hand is on Loki’s wasit and the other is clasping the back of his neck, pulling him close. He breaths against Loki’s cheek, smelling the familiar scent of his husband beneath the unfamiliar perfume. Incapable of doing anything else, he turns his head to seek those lips he knows so well. 

Loki jerks his face to the side, leaving Thor to skim his mouth across a pale ear instead. He can work with that. “Baby,” he whispers. 

Loki shivers. 

“Lucky!”

Loki jumps away from Thor, keeping his face averted. 

Thor can’t yet register who called Loki’s fake name. He feels like the floor just collapsed beneath their feet. 

“Hey, Donald.” Oh, it’s Bruce.

Thor clears his throat, finally looks away from Loki. “Bruce. Hey.”

“Hey, yeah, En Dwi is coming this way. Just, uh, thought you might like to know that.” Bruce does a poor job of appearing casual. 

Thor nods absently in thanks, unable to really care too much that Bruce thinks that what he just witnessed happened between brothers. They both look to Loki, who is smoothing his hair and pointedly not looking back at them. 

En Dwi ambles into their chunk of the dance floor, seemingly clueless to the tension. “Ah, Pet. I wondered where you’d wandered off to. I was, uh, beginning to get worried you’d found another man.” He looks over Thor and Bruce. “Clearly I had nothing to worry about.” He grins insultingly. 

Loki finally turns back toward them. The smile on his face looks somewhat painful. “En, darling. Just in time. I need a dance partner. I’ve been horrendously bored.” 

En Dwi’s answering leer is more predator than lover. “Ah, Pet. I shall never turn down a dance from you.” He sweeps up a slightly stiff-limbed Loki and they immediately begin grinding obscenely. Their skin tight leather makes horrible squeaking noises as yellow rubs against blue. 

The sight, right after having felt so close to - to something, feels even worse than seeing Loki dance for En Dwi at the birthday party. Back then, Loki had stared Thor down like he was making a point. This time, Loki is avoiding Thor’s gaze entirely as we grinds against another man. 

Thor didn’t think it could get worse. Well, somehow, this is worse. 

“Hey, uh, Donald. Maybe we should give them some space.” 

Thor doesn’t realize he’s staring until Bruce’s words register. He tries to configure his face into something less forlorn and turns away. It doesn’t make much difference, the image is seared into his brain anyway. 

Bruce clears his throat awkwardly. “You, uh, you okay buddy?”

Thor affects a facsimile of a smile. “Yes, of course, friend. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Bruce’s brow crinkles deeply. 

“I just, uh - it’s hard watching my baby brother all grown up is all.” 

Bruce appears distinctly unconvinced. He looks over Thor’s shoulder. Thor follows his gaze, turning just enough to catch sight of Loki and En Dwi sucking rather severely on each other’s tongues. He turns away as fast as he can, feeling suddenly dizzy. Bruce puts a hand on his shoulder to steady him. 

“How about we step outside, Donald? You look like you could use some fresh air.” 

Wanting nothing more than to escape this place, Thor nods. He follows Bruce up the staircase to the balcony and out a different door than they entered through. They come out on the side of the building, away from the bustling street. The air outside has cooled significantly and the sun has set. 

Thor gulps in a couple breaths, fighting against the frustration he feels. Gamora told him to just be himself. Well, he tried that and it ended with Loki’s tongue down another man’s throat. This isn’t going to work. She was wrong. 

“So Donald.” Fuck. Thor had nearly forgotten Bruce was with him. “Want to tell me what that was all about in there?”

Thor suddenly cares a great deal more than he had five minutes ago that Bruce thinks he and Loki are brothers. Who knows how much he saw? How is Thor meant to get out of this? “What do you mean?” When in doubt, play dumb.

Bruce’s brow does that deep crinkly thing again. “I don’t think there’s much point in me stating the obvious, is there?”

Thor grunts. “I don’t know what you want me to--”

“Donald. You just tried to kiss your own brother.”

  
  



	40. Bruce

“Donald. You just tried to kiss your own brother.”

Thor stares dumbly at Bruce for several long moments as he tries to think up a response. Continue playing dumb? No, that’ll just make Bruce concerned for Thor’s brain function at this point. Claim it was an accidental almost kiss? No, that’s hardly believable. Perhaps they’re just very affectionate brothers? No, they supposedly haven’t seen each other in eight years. Just tell him the truth? 

Thor sighs. “I’m not his brother.” 

Bruce just blinks patiently. 

Thor shifts awkwardly. “I thought that’d get a bit more of a reaction.”

Bruce shrugs. “To be honest, I’d already suspected that.” 

Thor is flabbergasted. “What? How?”

Bruce smiles indulgently. “Well, for starters you haven’t acted like brothers even once that I’ve seen you together. You spend most of your time staring longingly at him and he spends most of his time flaunting his boyfriend in your face. Secondly, when you first showed up at the party, Lucky seemed utterly confused when En Dwi told him his ‘brother’ had shown up, more so than if you were just separated. Thirdly, you have a horrible American accent. No really, you do. Oh, and there’s the fact that you just tried to kiss him.” 

Thor doesn’t know how to respond. So he doesn’t. 

“En Dwi does think you want to screw your brother though.” 

That startles a laugh out of Thor. “Yeah, I was beginning to suspect that.” 

Buce looks at him kindly. “So, you ready to explain to me why Lucky’s ex, or so I’m assuming, is posing as his brother?” 

Thor huffs another laugh. “I don’t think you’d believe me. It’s a pretty long story.” 

“Well, I don’t really feel like going back inside that awful club and our car won’t be arriving for a couple hours yet. I’ve got time.” 

*******

“Pet, your heart is bu-dum bu-dum-ing so fast. Have I got you that worked up already?”

Instead of answering the question, Loki distracts En Dwi with a forceful kiss. It works. En Dwi shuts up so Loki can have a mental meltdown in peace. 

Fuck, fuck fuck. What the hell is he doing? And what did he almost let Thor do? Having that man around while Loki is trying to work is far too dangerous. That much was made clear back when Thor was his mark. Loki can’t maintain professionalism with that man anywhere near him. 

What are he and the others even doing here? It couldn’t have been easy to track Loki all the way to Miami, so why do it? What do they hope to gain? They’re smart enough to know they won’t be getting their possessions back. Tony got his closure. Brunnhilde and Thor have determined that Loki is a horrible person. So why are they helping Gamora? Why are they still here? What do they want? 

And why was Thor acting like that all of a sudden, anyway? Is it possible he actually still has feelings for Loki? The real Loki? Even after everything? No, no, he’s made it perfectly clear that he doesn’t like the real Loki. He thinks he’s a snake, a deceiver, a pathetic, friendless, treacherous traitor-- Wait. That’s it. 

Thor wants revenge. 

They’re still here because they’re plotting Loki’s ruin. Gamora recruited them to her plot against Thanos by bribing them with the promise of revenge. They’ve concocted some scheme that they think will bring them vengeance for their ruined lives. 

But why would Gamora value their help? What could they do against Thanos? Then again, they are far more capable and organized than Loki gave them credit for. He’d assumed they’d followed him without much forethought as to what they would do once they actually found him. A dog chasing tires and all that. But they’ve gotten much further than he would have expected. They found each other, then Loki’s birth home, and Loki himself. They then terrorized him at the birthday party, accosted him at the restaurant, and followed him to the nightclub. 

And then Thor tried to trick Loki into thinking that he still cared about him by dancing and flirting. 

The realization hurts more than it should. Oh, Loki knows it’s hypocritical. That’s exactly how he makes his living: tricking people into thinking he cares about them. Now he knows how it feels to be the mark. 

He doesn’t like it. 

But Loki is a master of deception. Those three menaces are mere amateurs, even with Gamora’s help. Luck is all that’s gotten them this far. And Lucky is Loki’s new name. Now that Loki knows the game, he very much intends to win. 

The first step is figuring out what exactly their plan is. Clearly they intend to use Thor as a big, sexy lure. They probably intend to give Loki a taste of his own poison: get him to care about Thor and then break his heart. Well, the joke is on them. Loki already broke his own heart when he left Thor the first time. So ha. 

But they probably intend far more than that. Loki didn’t just break their hearts. He took their entire lives from them. They can’t turn him into the authorities, though. Loki has blackmail on all of them. 

They’ll probably try and lure him into a false sense of security with Thor playing the lover while Tony and Brunnhilde play good cop (Tony, clearly) / bad cop (Brunnhilde, duh) and convince him to give information on how to get to the Soul. Then they, along with Gamora, will try to find it and take it for themselves before Loki can get to it. Thus leaving Loki heartbroken and out of a job. And quite possibly dead. Daddy will not be best pleased if the Soul is taken by a few menaces that Loki failed to report. Thus, they will get Loki out of the way for Gamora to exact her ridiculous scheme to rebel against Thanos. 

Oh and, after what he just witnessed, Bruce has probably figured out at least some of the current situation. Loki’s pretty sure he’d already had some suspicions (thanks to Thor’s god awful American accent) and this will only exacerbate them. Gamora may even talk him into joining her coup too. Just fucking great. 

*******

“That is… quite the story.”

Thor gives a valiant attempt at a smile. “That’s Loki for you.”

Bruce breaths a deep sigh. “Well, at least the name ‘Loki’ isn’t too big of an adjustment from ‘Lucky’. That part at least should be easy enough to get used to. The rest, well...” 

Thor chuckles. “Trust me, I’ve been there. I’m still there. I knew Luke. I married Luke. Now I have to get to know Loki.” 

Bruce smiles lopsidedly. “You really care about him, don’t you?”

Thor chuffs. “I do.”

“And you think he’s worth saving? Even after everything he did to you?”

“I hope so.” 

“Well, then I won’t stand in your way. Besides, I consider Mr. Gast a friend of sorts. I don’t care to see him conned by his boyfriend.” Bruce shakes his head. “Wow. Lucky’s a con man. I mean, I could always tell that Lu - Loki was smarter than he let on. I just figured he downplayed his intelligence to make himself, I don’t know, cuter.”

“Then you see him better than most. It seems he can fool just about anyone.” 

Bruce shakes his head just a little too vehemently. “Nah, I just analyze things for a living. I don’t think I see him especially clearly.” 

Thor keeps pushing. “And Loki seems to like you better than most of the people at Sakaar.”

Bruce’s eyes narrow. With his features, it doesn’t come off particularly threatening. “I know what you’re doing.” 

“And I’m sure you’re absolutely right. And, my, that kind of insight can come in handy.” 

Bruce huffs. “I don’t want to get involved.”

“A little late for that, don’t you think?” 

“What’s in it for me? Why should I help you?”

“Think of it as helping En Dwi.”

“You’re trying to guilt me into helping you?”

“No, I’m trying to guilt you into helping En Dwi.” Thor grins.

“I-- no, I can’t. That’s not me, man. I’m the quiet scientist that stays out of other people’s business. This is the definition of getting _ into _ other people’s business. I just want to do my work and keep my head down.” 

Thor sighs. “Alright. I get it. I won’t get you involved.” He starts to walk away, but turns back to add, “I just hope you still have a job once the Black Order brings down Sakaar.” He walks back into the club before Bruce comes up with a response.

  
  



	41. The Silence

Upon reentering the club, Thor immediately scopes out the dance floor in search of his friends. He spots them sitting in a booth and walks over to join them. 

“Hammer Time! There you are. You missed a whole lot of nasty makeout sessions. Not between Brunnhilde and me.” Tony grimaces. Brunnhilde glares. “Between Loki and Balloon Dick over there,” he clarifies, gesturing to where Loki and En Dwi are sitting across the room at the bar. Said couple is currently feeding each other chocolate dipped fruit and taking shots of some violently green liquor. 

Thor sits next to Brunnhilde in the booth and joins them in observing the display. Talking with Bruce has calmed him significantly. He feels like he can observe more objectively now. He endeavors to prove it. “Have you guys made any progress?”

Brunnhilde scoffs. “How exactly are we meant to do that when he’s surgically attached to his new boyfriend? Even if we knew how to get through to Loki, we can’t do it in front of that guy.”

Thor and Tony sigh. They know Brunnhilde’s right. As long as En Dwi is with Loki, they can’t really make any progress.

“I think I can help with that,” another voice chimes in. 

Thor looks up in surprise. “Bruce.” 

Bruce smiles warily as he walks up to the table. “Yeah, I thought about it a bit more and you’re right. What happened to you was terrible and if I can help keep it from happening again, I have a moral obligation to do so.” He clears his throat. “And, yeah, there’s the fact that if I don’t help you I may end up out of a job.” 

Thor grins. 

Tony and Brunnhilde baulk. “What?”

*******

Loki takes another shot of green water as En Dwi knocks back his seventh shot of creme de menthe. The bartender gives Loki a conspiratorial wink as he feigns swaying and nearly falling from his stool. 

En Dwi steadies him with a hand on his clavicle. Loki fights the instinct to flinch back from the firm hold so close to his throat. Instead he giggles. “Ahhhh-hahahaa, En, you saved me.” He leans closer, subtly dislocating En Dwi’s hand, and drawls, “My hero.” 

“Mr. Gast,” a familiar voice calls from behind them. 

En Dwi turns, nearly unbalancing himself. “Oh, Brucey-Boy.”

Loki eyes him suspiciously. He hasn’t missed the fact that Bruce and Thor were both missing for at least an hour right after Bruce caught them in a compromising position. The likelihood that Thor caved and told Bruce everything is high. The question is what he will do with the information.

Bruce makes eye contact with Loki over En Dwi’s shoulder. They hold each other’s stares long enough that Loki can tell that Bruce knows that Loki knows that Bruce knows about Loki being an imposter. He narrows his eyes at Bruce to communicate as much. Bruce narrows his eyes back. The message is received. 

“Bruce,” Loki greets curtly. “We haven’t seen much of you tonight.” 

“Yes, I’ve been getting to know your  _ brother _ .” Bruce’s disapproving emphasis on the last word luckily seems to go over the drunken En Dwi’s head. 

Loki scowls. “Go away, Buce. En and I are having a lovely time just the two of us.” 

“Now, now, Pet. Stop being ru-hic-rude,” En Dwi slurs. 

“Actually, Mr. Gast,” Bruce says, “I was hoping to introduce you to an associate of mine that I just ran into.”

Loki knows distraction when he sees it. Bruce is trying to get him away from En Dwi so the others can corner him. Well, two can play that game. Loki is the queen of distraction. “You want to talk science-stuff now? No, no, we’re here to have fun. Aren’t we En? Come on, let’s dance.” 

“Oh, really?” Bruce asks with mock innocence. “That’s too bad. I know you’ve been wanting to meet Dr. Ross, Mr. Gast. Ah, well. Perhaps the next time she’s in the country.” 

En Dwi perks up instantly. “Dr. Ross you say? Betty, you mean. Bettyyyy. Betty Ross.” 

Loki groans internally. Bruce has just beat him. En Dwi has been trying to get Dr. Ross to work for him for years. He won’t pass up the chance to finally make his case in person. Indeed, the drunken man is swanning off before Bruce can so much as point him in the right direction. Bruce gives Loki one more look before he’s hurrying after the swaying En Dwi. 

Loki sighs and turns back to the bar. He signals to the bartender to get him a real drink. He’ll need it for what he’s pretty sure is coming next. He slumps forward on the bar and waits. Sure enough, no more than 30 second later his suspicions are confirmed. 

“Heya, Lackey.” Brunnhilde sounds smug as anything. 

Loki doesn’t even turn around to look at her. He just takes a deep pull of his gin and tonic, his actual drink of choice. 

“What, no snarky comment?” Tony’s voice follows. “Come on, Morticia. I expected better.”

It would seem that Loki is collecting nicknames. Well, that’s just fine. It’s not like anyone ever calls him by his real name anyway. He takes another pull of his drink. 

A deep-toned throat clear announces Thor’s presence behind him as well. “We were hoping you’d be willing to talk.” 

Loki can’t help but scoff. Talk. As if that’s what anyone wants to do with him. 

“Come on, don’t be like that.” Tony’s voice again. “You bored of us already?”

“You could at least spare the decency to look at us when we’re talking to you.” Loki can hear the scowl in Brunnhilde’s voice. 

A heavy hand lands on Loki’s shoulder. “Hey, are you o--” 

“Don’t touch me!” Loki strikes the hand away, finally standing and spinning to face them. 

Thor raises his hands in supplication, face calm. Tony and Brunnhilde, though, look rather taken aback.

“We just want to help,” Thor says softly. 

“I know why you’re here,” Loki snarls. “I know what you want from me. There’s only two things that anyone wants from me. To fuck me or to punish me. And you’ve all already gotten one of those.” 

Thor’s look of calm instantly shatters into one of horror. “Wha--”

“Oh, poor thing,” Loki mocks. “Thought you could trick me into thinking you care about a traitorous whore like me. That I would believe you wanted to fuck me more than you wanted me dead. Well, think again. I know what I am. I’m not so easily deluded as the likes of you.”

“Shit, Morticia.” Tony sounds like he just got punched in the stomach. 

“God, we’re trying to help you,” Brunnhilde gasps out.

“What, by putting me out of my misery? Ha! Believe me, you won’t just be getting me killed by doing this. You’re going to get yourselves killed as well. You won’t be so smug then, will you?” 

“Smug? Do we look smug to you?” 

Loki doesn’t deign to dignify Tony’s question with an answer. He’s done with this ‘talk’. He pivots to walk away, marching through dancers and around the bar to the emergency closet. He sweeps inside and shuts the door. The following silence is blissful. He leans back against a wall of thick green leather coats, closes his eyes, and takes several deep breaths, attempting to calm the roar of his mind. 

As soon as the storm dies down enough to hear his own thoughts, he immediately tries to drown them out again. They have nothing good to say. 

The silence is unsettled by the sound of music filtering in briefly between the door clicking open and then shut again. Loki reluctantly opens his eyes, resigned to facing whoever he will find there. 

It’s Thor. 

  
  



	42. The Tallest Tower

The silence is unsettled by the sound of music filtering in briefly between the emergency closet door clicking open and then shut again. Loki reluctantly opens his eyes, resigned to facing whoever he will find there. 

It’s Thor. 

Loki smiles wryly, looking up to the ceiling. Of course it’s Thor. 

“I wanted to make sure you were okay.” 

Loki scoffs. “I don’t think I’ve been okay a day in my life.” 

Thor is quiet for a moment. “I would like to try and change that. If you would let me.” 

It’s such a Thor thing to say. Loki looks back at the larger man. He hasn’t made a move to step any closer to Loki. He looks as genuine as Loki’s ever seen him. “You think you really mean that.” 

Thor’s forehead creases unhappily. “I do mean it.” 

By some unspoken oath, both of their voices have stayed soft since stepping into the closet. Loki feels the contrast between this tranquil quiet and the booming club like stepping into the shade of a tree, out of the blistering heat. 

The corners of his lips lift without his consent. “You’re much like a tree, you know.” 

Thor’s smile is slow, but strong. “There you are.” 

Loki doesn’t respond. He would have no idea what to say.

*******

Thor moves to lean against the wall opposite Loki. “ I truly don’t want revenge, you know. Well, maybe a bit. But not against you.” 

Loki’s small smile disappears. To Thor, it feels like the stars being lost to the smaug of a city. “What exactly is it you want here?” Loki asks. “I told you already, you're not getting your things back. Or am I one of your things? It seems that's all I ever am. Someone’s possession.”

Thor is intensely distressed by this new self-demeaning side of Loki he’s seeing. He’s never known the man to be anything but proud. But it would seem the exact opposite is the truth. “I wish you could see yourself through my eyes. You would see a force too great to ever be contained or possessed.”

Loki’s lips twitch up a fraction. He pushes off the wall and walks toward Thor slowly. “You were my favorite, you know. Of all the marks I’ve had. I liked you best.” He reaches a hand out to bush Thor’s sternum, trails it up to cup his cheek. 

Thor’s heart is beating so wildly against his ribs, he’s afraid they’ll crack. 

Loki presses close to Thor, lips to his ear. “You could have me, you know,” he whispers. “You could fuck me right here in this closet. Press me into the racks of leather, strip me out of these restrictive pants, and take me. Right. Here.”

Thor’s breathing is labored and his brain is quickly being robbed of its blood. “Loki--”

“You can call me Luke.” Thor’s stomach twists horribly at the words. “You can call me whatever you like. Just so long as you give up this scheme once you’re through.” 

Thor shoves Loki away. “Fuck you.”

Loki pushes right back into Thor’s space, his sultry smile just millimeters from Thor’s bared teeth. “But darling, that’s what you’re here for, isn’t it? If it’s not revenge you want from me, that just leaves. One. Thing.” He punctuates his words with obscene flicks of his tongue. 

Thor grabs Loki by the shoulders and spins them to pin Loki to the wall of leather. 

“Ah, see, now you’re getting the idea,” Loki purrs, wrapping his arms around Thor’s neck and grinding his hips into Thor’s. His eyes are unfocused and vacant, no sign of true desire. It makes Thor feel sick. 

He slams Loki back into the wall again and shouts, “You can’t just play with people like this!” 

For a moment, Loki doesn’t react. Like he’s not even present. Then a sad smile clambers onto his face. “What else can I do? It’s the only thing I’m good at.”

Thor’s anger shatters and he feels shards of it pierce his heart. “Loki. I’m not here to get revenge on you. And I’m not here to fuck you. I’m here to help you.” 

Loki’s face twists into a terrible snarl. “I don’t need your  _ pity _ .” Loki pushes at him, but Thor holds him firmly to the wall. 

“Loki, you don’t have to live like this. You can get out. You can escape this life.” 

Loki quits struggling all at once and stares at Thor, wide-eyed. A look of wonder blooms on his face. Then it’s a smile and it makes Thor’s heart soar. He’s gotten through to him. 

Then Loki starts giggling. Then he’s laughing. Then he’s cackling, until he reaches a pitch so high it hurts Thor’s ears. He lets go of the maniacal man, disturbed. “What? What’s so funny?”

Loki suppresses his guffaws with obvious effort. “You poor fool. You think I’m some swooning damsel in peril. Gamora really has you groomed to play the bold knight, doesn’t she?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Thor, oh Thor.” Loki pushes off the wall to close the distance between them once more and cups Thor’s face in his palms. Affectionately, softly, he confides, “You can’t save me. You can’t save me because I’m not trapped in the highest room of the tallest tower. I climbed there all on my own.”

Thor shakes his head, but not enough to dislodge Loki’s hands on his face. “No, you started this too young. You’ve been brainwashed. You think this all there is for you, but it’s not.”

Loki’s fingers turn to claws, digging into Thor’s cheeks. “Don’t you dare tell me what I want. I want to stay with Daddy. He’s the only one who's ever loved me, the real me, without  _ pity _ .” 

“That man’s not your father. He’s your kidnapper!”

“Don’t! Speak of things you don’t understand.”

Thor grabs Loki’s hands up from where they’re surely leaving claw marks on his face. “Loki. Loki!” He struggles against the lean man’s writhing until finally he stills, eyes sending daggers into Thor. “I don’t pity you. Concern and pity are not the same thing.” 

Loki spits out a laugh. “Talk about brainwashed. I really did a number on you, didn’t I? Don’t you realize it yet? I manipulated you. I never cared for you. You’re just some poor sucker that I brainwashed into thinking I loved you.”

Those are the words that finally hit Thor in a vital spot. He’s a fool. Of course Loki never cared for him. Of course this will never work. Loki will never betray the man he sees as his father for a pathetic lout that can’t accept reality. 

He lets go of Loki, stepping back. It doesn’t feel far enough, so he keeps going until something blocks his path. It’s the door. 

The sight of Loki staring after him with searing eyes is the last thing he sees before it swings shut between them.

  
  



	43. Worthy

The moment Thor steps out of the closet, Loki decides to attempt an experiment to see if he can drown in his own tears. It’s a valiant effort and, if he does say so himself, he damn near succeeds. 

Of all the terrible things Loki’s done, this feels the worst. And he doesn’t even know why. All he knows is that watching Thor walk out that door was the by far the most painful thing he’s ever experienced. 

Loki checks his watch. It’s nearly time to leave the nightclub. He rubs his face clean of tears and snot on an offensively yellow miniskirt and straightens his own hideous leathers. Hopefully the colorful lights of the club will disguise his red, blotchy face. 

He stalls with his hand hovering over the door handle. What if Thor can tell he’s been crying? What if he thinks Loki is pathetic? In the past, when Thor noticed Loki had been crying he would gather him up in his giant arms and comfort him without a single question as to the reason. It was the most selfless embrace Loki has ever felt. 

But things are different now. Loki’s own actions have repeatedly ensured that he will never experience such comfort ever again. 

He chokes back a sob and opens the door before he can psych himself out any more. 

The club is far less crowded than when he entered the closet 45 minutes ago. It’s late (or early) enough that most people are stumbling back home to pass out on top of someone. 

Loki scans the sparse dance floor in search of anyone from his group to distract him. The first face he spots is Brunnhilde. She’s clearly drunk again and is dancing with a tall blonde woman. They’re putting on quite the enticing display. Loki almost wishes he was in the mood to properly appreciate it. 

The next person he spots is Korg. Not the worst option. But, oh, Bruce is with him. Now that is something Loki cannot deal with right now. 

He keeps looking. There’s En Dwi. That sounds awful. There’s Doug. No thank you. Oh there’s Bucky. But he’s with Topaz. No way. There’s Miek. Ha, no. 

Loki’s not sure if he’s dreading finding Thor or hoping to. 

Eventually, the decision of who to join is made for him. 

“Hey. Morticia. What did you do to Thor?” Tony says from behind him. 

Loki swallows twice before turning to face Tony and attempting a response. “I haven’t done anything. Well, not recently anyway.” He forces a smarmy grin. Or, at least, he hopes that’s what it looks like rather than the grimace it feels like. 

“No, see, that’s not an acceptable response. Thor ran out of the club not twenty minutes ago looking like someone just shot his kitten and I’m pretty sure you’re the only person who could or would do that to him.” 

Loki can’t disagree and so he doesn’t. It’s not really a surprise that Thor left. Loki gave him no reason to stay. He abandons his pretense and offers a small smile that contains every bit of the sadness he feels. “I’m the devil, remember?”

Tony’s glare fades into a look of shocked realization. The sadness in it, amazingly, doesn’t seem to be for himself. 

“Pet, Lucky Boy, scrumptious-ness!” En Dwi interrupts, pushing Tony out of the way. “I have uuh, uh, news. You will be thrilled. Just thrilled. Utterly tickled. I have convinced Betty to consider my offer. All it took was three drinks and fifty minutes of asking -hic- repeatedly.” 

Loki hides his cringe under a drunken facade. “En, that’s amazing! I mean, I don’t really get what kind of boring science stuff she does,” he does and it’s fascinating, “but she’d be stupid to turn you down.” 

Loki throws his arms around En Dwi’s neck in a way that’s a little too reminiscent of how he flung himself at Thor mere minutes ago. Over En Dwi’s shoulder, Tony and Loki’s eyes make contact. Tony looks like he’s watching a car crash in slow motion. Loki decides that’s rather apt, seeing as he feels like he’s in the driver’s seat. 

*******

Thor sits in a shadowed corner of a bustling Miami bar. He doesn’t want to draw attention to himself. Not tonight. 

There’s a scotch in front of him, untouched. He can’t seem to bring himself to drink it. It just seems like another piece of proof that his life with Loki was a lie. This drink was the very first thing that brought them together. Or so he’d thought. Loki doesn’t even like scotch though. That meeting was nothing but an orchestration. A lie. 

He sighs and finally picks up the glass, throwing the whole thing back. Damn. That’s good scotch. Not watered down at all. It seems unjust somehow. 

“You look like you could use some company,” purrs a smokey voice. 

Thor turns to find one of the most beautiful women he’s ever seen. She fills out her black jeans and jacket with soft, lean curves and her hair falls in elegant ringlets around her heart shaped face. He huffs. The busy bar, the scotch, the beautiful person popping up out of nowhere - it’s all a little too familiar and it sours the memory even further. “Sorry, not interested.” 

The woman smirks and sits anyway. “Why? Is there another lucky girl I should be jealous of?” 

Thor coughs a short laugh at the woman’s coincidental use of Loki’s current pseudonym. “A lucky boy actually. Or, well, person. He’s not too picky with gender labels.”

She regards him with what looks like approval. “Well, then he really is quite lucky to have someone so open minded and conscious of his preferences so enamoured with him.” She tilts her head in a way that’s familiar. “So why isn’t he here with you? Surely he can recognize what a catch you are.” 

Thor scoffs ruefully. “Yeah, I don’t think he agrees with you there. At one time, I thought--” He shakes his head, warding off the inappropriately timed tears. “But I was wrong. He feels nothing for me.” 

“So why are you still bothering with him? Sounds like someone not worthy of your time.” 

Thor is somewhat appalled at the woman’s reasoning. “Because, to me, he will always be worthy. Just because I can’t have him doesn’t mean he just stops mattering.” 

The woman regards him for a moment. “It really is a pity he can’t see what he’s got right in front of him. You’re truly are quite the catch.” 

Thor smiles gratefully. 

She smiles back. “But that’s why I’m here.” 

Thor’s smile fades as he tries to understand her meaning. “What do you--”

The woman abruptly extends her hand across the table. Thor shakes it, feeling quite lost. 

“Natasha.” 

“...Thor.”

“Yes, I know. Gamora has told me all about you.” 

“Gamora? What--” 

“I’m the Black Widow.”

  
  



	44. Black Widow

Thor is still missing when they leave the nightclub. Brunnhilde is too. Apparently she went home with her blonde dance partner. Tony makes some excuse to En Dwi about Thor and Brunnhilde leaving early for some ‘quality couple time’. Loki staunchly ignores the way En Dwi’s eyebrows do an odd jig to try and get his attention for some joke that would almost certainly allude to a bearded incestuous longing for one’s younger sibling. 

The ride in the limo turns out to be mercifully quiet. As soon as the door shuts, En Dwi is snoring on Loki’s shoulder. Doug, Miek, and Korg are playing some odd game with their pinky fingers. Topaz is taking a picture of the drooling En Dwi and posting it to Instagram. Tony is gazing thoughtfully out the window. Bucky is staring suspiciously at Tony. 

It could almost have been called peaceful if not for Bruce.

“So, Lucky. Did you get to have some quality time with your brother tonight?”

A vein ticks in Loki’s forehead as he affects his facade. “Hardly, he’s no fun,” he slurs drunkenly, wrapping his arms around the limp En Dwi. “I can only endure his overbearing blabbering for so long. Luckily - and I am Lucky ahahaha - I have my delectable sweetums here to keep me occupied.” 

Bruce hums. “Really? It sure seemed like you guys were in that closet for quite a while.”

The eyes of every awake person in the limo abandon their respective distractions and turn to look at Loki. Damn. so Bruce noticed that. And now he’s made everyone else aware as well.

“Indeed. Hence my conclusion that my _ brother _ is a great bore. Who else would drag me into a closet to talk about plans for Thanksgiving for half an hour? I mean, really. It’s wasted dancing time.” 

This seems to successfully dispel the intrigue of their fellow passengers as they all go back to their respective activities. Except Tony. 

“Thanksgiving, huh? That’s months away.” Tony grins cheekily. “I hope those plans involve all of us spending it together. Bruce, you’re invited.” 

“How kind of you, Tony.” Bruce looks back at Loki. “I accept.”

Loki clicks his tongue. Oh, Bruce, Bruce, Bruce. Such potential. He just had to go and take up with the heroes. 

He will come to regret that. 

*******

Thor takes a fortifying breath and slots his key into the hotel door. As it swings open, Tony and Brunnhilde look up from their respective sprawls. 

“Hey, where the hell did you go? You totally ditched us at that--” Tony cuts off as he notices the woman standing behind Thor. “Uh, since when did we say it was cool to bring hook-ups back to the room? Why wasn’t I notified of this? Brunnhilde just returned from her own jaunt. I could’ve been making way better use of having the room to myself.” 

Clint, who had joined Thor and Natasha after they left the bar, slips in behind them, quirking an eyebrow at Tony. Thor has noticed he’s a man of few words and speaks largely through facial expression. 

Thor rolls his eyes. He doesn’t bother acknowledging Tony’s rude question. “Guys, this is Clint and Natasha. Hawkeye and the Black Widow.” 

There’s a clatter as Tony scrambles up from the bed, nearling toppling the nightstand in the process, and Brunnhilde levers up over the back of the couch from where she’d been laid out. 

“You mean _ the _ Black Widow? As in Loki’s clone mama?” 

Thor has no idea what ‘clone mama’ means but he figures there’s only one Black Widow that Tony would be thinking of. “Yes.” 

Natasha steps forward. “I was Loki’s mentor. I still consider him a dear friend. Although, I doubt he would say the same of me.” 

“And why is that?” Tony asks suspiciously. 

“That,” she says, “Is a very long story.”

“Why exactly are you here?” Brunnhilde interjects.

“The same reasons as you. To stop Thanos and get Loki out of the Black Order.” 

“I thought you weren’t going to help until we could get Loki on our side,” Brunnhilde challenges.

“It was brought to my attention that convincing Loki may require some help from myself.” 

“So you think you’re the one who can get Loki to switch sides?” Tony looks as though he’s trying not to pout. 

Natasha frowns. “I cannot be the one to get him out. I know, for I have already tried.”

“You tried getting him out before?”

“Yes. He and my stories are intertwined. I am the reason Loki got into the Order and Loki is the reason that I got out. It is because of this that I will never be the one to change his course.”

Thor perks up. Natasha hadn’t told him this at the bar. “You know how Loki got involved with the Order?” 

Natasha sighs. “Perhaps I should tell you the story from the beginning.” She motions toward the seating area of their room. “Sit.” 

They all obey.

Once everyone is settled into chairs and couches, Natasha begins. 

“I met Loki in Norway. In 2005.”

  
  



	45. Norway, 2005

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another piece of the story... but not the whole story.

Natasha voices her and Loki’s story as though purging a viscous bile too long held in. By unspoken order, Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde keep their silence as they listen. 

“In 2005, I was running a con for the Black Order in Hammerfest, Norway. I was tasked with obtaining an object that Thanos desired, called the Casket. It was an item that had been thought lost for many years. Until Thanos discovered it to be in the possession of a company called Jotunheim. Laufey Ymirson's company.

“Laufey had three sons, Bylster, Helbindi, and Loki. I infiltrated the company by seducing the eldest, Bylster, who worked for his father. In my usual style, I married him and gained access to his entire life. Bylster was not a kind man. I bore bruises often enough to prove it. Helbindi, the middle son, was better. But he would do what he had to in order to get along with his father and older brother. Loki, though, would not. In fact, I rarely saw him speak without being forced to. Bylster and Laufey thought little of Loki. And what I'd seen of him during my time there had shown me why. Loki was odd. Asocial. Withdrawn. And, as Bylster never failed to mention, small. At least in comparison to his brothers. But in truth, I paid little attention to the youngest Laufeyson. He had no bearing on my mission. I was soley focused on using Bylster to infiltrate Jotunheim and find the Casket.

"Eight months into the job, I finally located the Casket. But it was heavily guarded. And so, I sought an opening to steal it away. I searched for an opportunity for a month. Then one day, there was a convenient lag in security. The opening was perfectly presented.

"I should have realized it was just a little too perfect.

“When I made it to the room in Jotunheim where the Casket was kept, there was someone else already there. Loki, just 12 at the time. He’d been the one to create the opening for me. 

"Apparently he'd been suspicious of me. Observed me. Monitored me. He'd figured out that I was not who I said. That I was a con artist targeting his family. And he'd searched for my objective. He hacked into Jotunheim's computer systems and learned all about the casket. What it was. Where it was. He figured out my objective and beat me to it. And then lead me straight to it.

"He could have called the police. Or his father. Or taken it for himself. Instead, he stepped aside and watched me pick up the Casket.

“I asked him, ‘Why go through all this effort if you were just going to let me go?’ He replied, ‘Just a bit of fun, really.’ I knew then that the boy who I’d taken to be nothing more than Laufey’s pitiable youngest was not only a genius, but a bored one. And there’s nothing more dangerous than that. And dangerous things can either be left alone to implode or they can be weaponized. 

“In favor of the latter, I offered him the choice to join the Order. 

“He left with me that night. I took him with me to the rendezvous point. There he and Thanos met for the first time. 

“I told Thanos of the boy’s skill and ability. He accepted Loki into the fold on the condition that we ‘kill’ him. The world had to believe that Loki Laufeyson was dead. There could be no one sniffing after him. 

We had a hotel room prepared where Loki’s ID and a few other possessions would be left. Along with blood. Thanos bled Loki until the boy passed out. Then kept on bleeding him. I urged him to stop, told him that was enough. Thanos only shook his head and said that if the boy couldn’t handle this then he had no business joining the Order. 

“Of course, Loki did survive. And after quite a bit of time in an off radar hospital, he joined us at Black Order headquarters in Edinburgh. As with all of his other adoptive children, Thanos endeared himself to Loki as a father figure. When I passed Loki's room at bedtime, I would hear Thanos whipsering to him of all that he would give him that his birth father never had. Trust, attention, acceptance, love. 

"But the real reason for allowing Loki into the Order had little to do with giving him a better life. What Thanos truly sought was another member who could and would pull off the same cons as me. Loki was beautiful, intelligent, and stealthy, the perfect candidate for the role. He was young, but his tall stature and general demeanor helped him pass as older. And so, Thanos had me train him. 

“Within two years Loki was sent out on his first assignment. He was tasked with obtaining an object called the Crystal from a wealthy, elderly writer named Stan in Los Angeles. At 14 years old Loki married an 83 year old man. 

“I quickly regretted my decision to bring Loki into the Order. I’d never expected Thanos to start giving Loki such jobs so early. Loki was not even at the age of consent yet. And he was clearly shaken by the experience. Although Stan was a kindly man who did not treat him poorly, Loki was not ready for something like that. Nor was he ready to be pulling off high risk jobs.

“Stan caught him stealing the Crystal. The man had a heart attack from the shock. Loki panicked, tried to resuscitate him. However, Thanos had remained nearby for the heist, knowing that Loki had a high likelihood of screwing up on his first job. He stormed in and dragged Loki out of there along with the Crystal. 

“Luckily, Stan survived. In fact, he lived all the way to age 95. But Loki was scarred by the experience. And that was just the first in a long line of jobs that would shape who he would become as an adult. 

“Six years later, Loki had become a masterful con. His track record rivaled mine and I was the best Thanos had. However, Loki’s time with the Order had warped his mind. He started too young and Thanos was unrelenting with him. From day one, he never went easy on Loki. 

“The clever young outcast I met in Norway had grown into an even more efficient weapon than I could have predicted. But it came at the cost of Loki’s sanity. He began to lose touch with reality. He could perform perfectly in his roles but could no longer operate normally as himself. He saw everyone, even me, to be working against him. Delusionally so. And he began having episodes that made it clear that delusions were not the only thing plaguing his mind. 

“I regretted the decision I made back in 2005 to bring Loki into the Order every day that I saw him struggle against his own mind. 

“Eventually, I myself began questioning whether the Order was still the right life for me. I was beginning to tire of it all. And then I learned of something Thanos did, something I hadn’t known about before. Something I could not ignore. It became clear that it was time for me to leave. 

“Of course, you don’t simply leave the Black Order. And so along with Clint, my friend and con partner of nine years, we decided to utilize the skills that we learned during our time working for Thanos and disappear. 

“Again, a perfect opportunity presented itself. This time, though, I knew it was too perfect. I could recognize Loki’s handiwork by then. But I took the opening anyway. Truthfully, I’d hoped he would figure it out. It was part of the whole point. 

“Clint and I snuck out past the conveniently vacant security posts and came face to face with Loki. I begged him to come with us, to leave Thanos. He could have turned us in. He could have come with us. Instead, he stepped aside and watched us leave.” 

Natasha takes a shaky breath. “And that is why I cannot be the one to get him out. He needs someone who can get through to him in a way I’ve never been able and force him to change.” 

Thor can’t help but notice that she’s looking at him when she says it.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was Loki's origin story what you expected? Or were you totally surprised? Let me know in the comments!


	46. The Difference

Tony and Brunnhilde find him in the hotel courtyard.

“How’re you doing, big guy?” Tony asks.

Thor smiles half-heartedly up at his friends from his slump against a palm tree. “No worse than either of you, I am sure.”

Tony and Brunnhilde share a glance. “I’m not so sure that’s true,” Brunnhilde frowns. “Tony and I… well, Loki isn’t the person either of us married.”

“Yeah, I mean, I actually like Loki. Legitimately,” Tony adds. “But I’m not in love with him. He’s not Elle.”

“And he’s not Lachlan. I don’t see any of the man that I loved there anymore.”

Thor smiles sadly. “Then perhaps you are right. For he’s everything I remember.” He feels his face begin to crumple. “I still love him.”

Brunnhilde kneels to grasp Thor’s shoulder and Tony sits heavily next to him. 

“You know, Hammer Time, I think this may not be good for you.” Tony fidgets for a moment, hesitating. “Maybe we should leave this to Gamora, Natasha, and Clint. This isn’t our fight.”

Thor is shaking his head before Tony’s finished. “No, I can’t leave him here.”

“Thor, you heard Natasha,” Brunnhilde implores. “Loki chose to join the Order. He wants to be there.” 

Thor keeps shaking his head. It’s starting to make him dizzy. “No. He may have thought so back then and he might even think so now, but this isn’t where he belongs.”

“Thor, buddy,” Tony starts, “You keep thinking about what Loki needs. What about what you need?”

Thor frowns confusedly. Hasn’t he made this clear yet? “Loki is what I need.” 

Both Tony and Brunnhilde groan.

“You can’t let your life revolve around one person. It’s not healthy,” Brunnhilde insists.

Thor pouts. “My life does not revolve around him.” 

Tony lifts an eyebrow. “Right.” 

Thor glares at him. 

“One thing I will say,” Brunnhilde muses, “is that you may be the only person who could bear to love a person like Loki so unconditionally.”

*******

Loki gets Bruce fired. 

It’s shamefully easy really. All it takes is leaking a piece of the information he overheard when Bruce gave his report in En Dwi’s office. It wasn’t the reason he endeavored to listen in on the report, but it sure makes for a handy bonus. The top secret information was only meant to be known by En Dwi and Bruce. Therefore, when it gets leaked, there is only one reasonable person for En Dwi to blame. 

They hold a press conference. En Dwi denounces Bruce Banner, the renowned scientist, as a scoundrel. He will forever be unhireable. 

Loki is rather pleased with that outcome. 

*******

Bruce comes to their hotel room after he loses his job at Sakaar. 

“Bruce, I’m so sorry. I never meant for this to happen.” Thor feels terribly guilty. He convinced Bruce to join their effort to stop Thanos with the motivation of preserving his job. Instead, it’s caused the opposite to happen.

“Hey.” Bruce’s face is kind, if tired. “It’s okay. I knew the risks when I agreed to help you.” He sighs. “I just don’t know what I’m going to do now.” 

“How would you like a new job?” echos a smokey voice from behind Thor.

Bruce looks over Thor’s shoulder at the voice’s owner. “And who are you?”

*******

Gamora being En Dwi’s driver means, unfortunately, that she is Loki’s driver as well. Which is why the two of them are currently trapped alone together in a bright yellow Lexus, En Dwi’s second favorite vehicle after the limo.

She is driving him back to the penthouse from Sakaar just as she does every Wednesday when En Dwi goes out for poker night after he and Loki eat a catered dinner on the roof of Sakaar. This had previously been an excellent time for Gamora and Loki to share any new information they’d gathered with each other. Of course, things are different now. 

And so, Loki is avoiding interaction with Gamora by sitting in back and resolutely staring out the window. He is not pouting. Nor is he sulking. Indeed, he is not even brooding. He is merely making a point that he does not want to talk to her and has no intention of changing his mind about it. Okay, so maybe he’s pouting a little. 

However, the window staring pays off when Loki notices they’ve turned onto the wrong street. He breaks his self-imposed silence. “Gamora. Where are you taking me?”

“You’ll find out soon enough.”

With quick movements, Loki unbuckles, slips his hidden knife out of his sleeve, and reaches around the driver’s seat to set the blade to Gamora’s jugular. “I will find out now. Or I will kill you.”

Gamora scoffs. “I’m driving, you twat. If I die, so do you.”

Loki clicks his tongue and moves the blade to rest on her cheek. “Well then, I’ll just have to settle for disfiguring you.”

“You won’t.”

“Are you really certain of that?”  
“Yes. Because you’re not the devil you claim to be.”

“All evidence would point to the contrary.” 

Despite his own words, Loki slips the blade back into his sleeve and leans back in his seat. They ride the rest of the way to their unknown destination in silence.

They pull up outside a warehouse. It looks abandoned. Really, it feels terribly cliche. Loki rolls his eyes and follows Gamora inside. And yep, it’s as dusty and disgusting as Loki would have guessed. 

Unsurprisingly, they are not the only ones in the warehouse. Waiting for them are Thor, Tony, Brunnhilde, and Bruce. Ah, Bruce. It looks like Loki didn’t quite succeed in getting rid of him. 

Gamora breaks off from Loki and joins the others in a semicircle in front of him.

“Oh, dear,” Loki dramatizes, “am I about to get pummeled for disloyalty to the gang?”

“You should take this more seriously, Loki,” Gamora scolds. “We are going to bring down the Order. You can either join with us or you can get caught in the fire.” 

Loki cackles. “Oh, please. I could turn you into the Order at any time and you would all be dead at the snap of a finger.” 

Brunnhilde raises an eyebrow. “Then why haven’t you?”

“Because you’re not a serious enough threat to bother reporting. You are mere ants that will be crushed beneath the boot of the Order regardless of whether it knows you exist.” 

“Enough games, Loki,” Thor implores somberly. 

Loki turns to give him a wicked grin. “But isn’t that what all of this is? A game? I certainly feel like I’ve been winning in any case.”

Flashes of his and Thor’s last conversation, if it can be called that, whir across Loki’s retinas. Throwing his arms around Thor’s neck. Being slammed against the wall. Watching Thor’s eyes lose their light under a storm cloud of Loki’s own making. 

“Indeed, I do believe I’ve toppled two of your pieces already,” Loki taunts, eyeing Thor, then Bruce. 

His smile feels like a split melon. 

“And yet, if I recall, you’ve never beat me at a game of chess,” a familiar voice interjects. 

The melon cracks completely in two as the sound of it wedges its way inside Loki’s skull.

*******

Clint quietly enters and joins Thor and the others as they watch the reunion. Thor holds his breath as Natasha walks up behind Loki, who has yet to turn and face her. The manic smile is gone from his face, along with any other emotion. Thor wonders what feeling it is he’s trying to conceal. 

“Of course, when it came to Scrabble you were far superior,” Natasha continues as she walks towards Loki’s back. “So if this is a game of words,” She comes to a stop right behind him, close enough for his hair to shift under her breath, “then perhaps you are right.”

Loki finally turns to face Natasha. The two of them stare at each other’s faces as though identifying and alphabetizing every change they see there. 

Natasha’s eyes are glossy with hovering tears. It’s odd for Thor to witness such emotion from the poker faced woman. 

Loki’s expression remains unchanged until, at last, he releases a shaky breath. “_ Sestra _.”

The tears topple over Natasha’s cheeks as she lunges forward to pull Loki into a fierce hug. Loki does not return the embrace. But after a moment his neck seems to collapse, dropping his forehead to her shoulder. He looks utterly exhausted.

Thor feels very much as though he and the others are intruding on an intensely private moment.

When Natasha finally pulls away, she keeps them connected with a hand on Loki’s cheek. “_Privet,_ _Malysh_,” she says with a wet smile. “You've grown to be even more beautiful.” Her face darkens. “For your sake, I wish that were not the case.”

Loki bristles immediately, snarling and slapping her hand away. “As if you care about ‘my sake’.”

Natasha doesn’t look surprised at the outburst. “I wouldn't be here now if I didn't.”

“You’re not here for me. You’re here for Daddy.”

“I’m here for him because of you.” 

Loki scoffs. 

“Loki, you’re smarter than this. Stop refusing to see that there are those who care for you.”

“And just who would you be referring to?”

“Everyone in this room is here for your sake. Does that tell you nothing?”

Loki looks around at the assembled people. Thor feels a tingle of hope when their eyes meet ever so briefly. 

Loki sneers. “There’s only one person who’s ever really cared about me in my entire life. And he is not in this room.” 

That cuts Thor so deeply that he looks down at own chest, expecting blood. 

Natasha frowns. “What Thanos gives you, Loki, that is not love.”

“What would you know about it?”

Natasha doesn’t answer immediately, seeming to contemplate her answer. “What do you think everyone in this room has in common?” 

That seems to take Loki off guard. He looks around at each person again, first Tony, then Buce, Brunnhilde, Clint, and finally Thor. His gaze returns to Natasha. “All of you are people that I’ve hurt.” He states it as simple, affectless fact. 

Natasha nods, not arguing. “And have you ever hurt our father?”

Loki hesitates momentarily. “No.” 

She gives him a sad smile. “Loki, only the ones who love us can ever truly be hurt by us.” 

Loki’s eyes widen a fraction. A moment later he’s laughing at the ceiling. “Sister dear, your logic has become stale in your time away from the Order. A person does not need to feel love to feel hurt. I have a whole career to show for it.” 

“Are you referring to a career of hurting others? Or of being hurt yourself?”

Loki appears to be at a loss for a response to that. That’s not an easy thing to achieve. Thor knows from experience. 

“Loki,” Natasha implores, “Everyone here cares for you.” 

“How could I possibly believe that? I’ve done more to make each of you want me dead than to gain your favor.”

“Because that is the difference between love and what Thanos gives you. Love is not earned through favor. It is gifted despite hurt.”

Loki’s chest is rising and falling like a man about to run. He pivots and takes two steps away from them before Thor is calling out. 

“Loki!” He stalls his steps and Thor can’t waste what time Loki will give him so he lets the words come tumbling out. “Remember when we promised my mother we’d spend her 65th birthday pampering her? Because my father was on a work trip and we all knew he wouldn’t have time to call her.” 

Loki is still facing away from them but he’s yet to take another step. So Thor keeps going. 

“She was depressed about entering her senior years, even more so because of her knee replacement that was healing slowly and painfully. But we promised to make this birthday a positive experience. We told her we’d arrive at her house early, bring her breakfast in bed, take her to the art show she’d been dying to see, and treat her to dinner at her favorite restaurant. And she lit up. She was so excited.” 

Thor huffs. He still feels guilty over the memory. “But we forgot. We left her alone at home with her aching knee on her 65th birthday. We only remembered late in the evening, once it was far too late to follow through on any of our promises. We ran over to my parents’ house and found her laying out dinner. She smiled when we entered, saying she’d made enough for both of us in case we still showed up. Her eyes were red and swollen.”

Thor’s throat clicks as he swallows. “Loki, that hurt her. We hurt her. But she still welcomed us in and made us dinner. And we were so confused. How could she forgive us so easily?” Thor takes a breath. “It’s because she still cared for us. Even though we hurt her, she - she still loves us.” 

The cavernous warehouse falls silent as Thor runs out of words. Birds rustle in the rafters and wind rattles the tin roof as they all stare at Loki’s back. Finally, Loki takes a step. And another. 

And then Thor is watching the man he loves walk away from him yet again. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sestra (Russian) - Sister  
Privet, Malysh (Russian) - Hello, Little One


	47. Forking Paths

The minute the warehouse door shuts behind Loki, Thor is falling to his knees and slamming a fist on the concrete floor. He doesn’t even feel the pain in his hand through the pain that’s already consuming his chest. He’s never been so frustrated and despondent. He grits his teeth to keep from cursing Loki. 

A soft hand on his shoulder startles him. He snaps his head up to find Natasha. She’s back to her poker face but Thor is pretty sure the gesture is one of understanding. 

Tony coughs. “Hey, uh, is Loki just planning to walk the 20 miles back to the city, or…” 

Gamora curses and brings her hand to her pocket. “Damn Loki. He took the keys.” 

The sound of the Lexus revving up and peeling away echos in from outside the warehouse. They all groan. Gamora was the one to drive them all here before she picked Loki up. 

“When the hell did he have a chance to take the keys?” Bruce baulks.

Clint pulls out his phone. “I’ll call a cab.”

*******

Loki screeches up to the penthouse, parks the Lexus on the car elevator, and throws the keys on the hood just before it descends into the underground garage. Gamora will find them. 

He stalks inside only to smack straight into Korg. He backs up, rubbing his sore nose. Damn, what’s that guy made out of? Stone? 

“Oh, hey there Mr. Lucky. There you are. Sure are late. I was getting worried you’d had a nasty fall or impaled yourself on something sharp, like a stick.” 

“The driver got lost,” Loki responds half-heartedly as he walks around the large man. 

“Miss Tiana, really? But she drives here everyday. Perhaps she’s the one who’s had a nasty fall. We should check her head. And her elbows. Falls sure can be hard on the elbows.”

Loki ignores Korg and heads straight for the elevator, hitting the shut button before Korg can follow. He rests his head against the cold wall and lets out a harsh breath that fogs the metal. 

Nat is back. He thought he’d never see her again. Not after he let her leave. Not after she left him. It would seem to be a theme lately for people he thought gone from his life to claw their way back in. 

Thor’s voice is still echoing in his head. 

_ “It’s because she still cared for us. Even though we hurt her, she - she still loves us.”  _

Loki can’t ignore the double meaning to those words. Thor was trying to tell Loki--

The elevator dings and the doors open onto the tenth floor. Loki shakes his head and walks off. It hardly matters. Nothing’s changed since he left Thor back in Asgard on the day of the coronation. He can’t leave the Order. What would he do in the real world? He knows nothing but trickery. Sooner or later, Thor would come to his senses and realize that Loki isn’t a good person, isn’t a loveable person. He would leave him. And then where would Loki be? On the run from the only life suited to him and the only person who’s never pitied or underestimated him. The person who raised him. 

He pulls a strip of silicone from his pocket and presses it to the fingerprint pad outside a door. It’s amazing what you can do to a person while they’re sleeping. Such as taking a cast of their thumb.

The door opens with a soft swoosh and closes just as quietly behind him. He continues on in the dark. 

A gusty sigh escapes his lungs. Now that Nat and Clint are helping them, the menaces are going to be a much larger problem to deal with. Bruce teaming up with them could be a problem as well. 

Loki taps a long string of numbers into a keypad and passes through another door.

Bruce is well versed in Sakaar computer systems. There’s a high likelihood that with he and Tony working together they will actually make it past En Dwi’s firewalls. Which would definitely cause Loki problems. 

He reaches a third door and takes a break from his thoughts to sing the entirety of  _ You Don't Own Me _ . The door slides open. 

He can only guess where the menaces three and their accomplices will go from here. It would appear that they truly aren’t aiming for revenge on him personally. What they actually want from him… well, Loki’s not sure whether to believe their claims there, but there is one thing he knows for sure. They are well aware that Loki is best situated to find the Soul. They want his help getting it. 

He comes to one last door and uses his finger to draw a classic graffiti dick on the touchpad. It slides open. 

He walks into the room and contemplates his options. He could turn Gamora and all the others in to Thanos. Loki would certainly face some form of punishment for concealing it up until now, but he would live. The others would not be so lucky. Option 1 is out. 

He could keep quiet and continue to thwart them. They’re amassing quite the team, though, and they will be more effective than he originally accounted for. So Option 2 is out as well.

He could return to Thanos and claim that En Dwi is a dead end, divert him away from this place and leave the menaces behind. But they tracked Loki once and he’s pretty sure they can and will do it again. It would be putting off the inevitable. Which means Option 3 is out. 

That just leaves two options. 

Orange light reflects up onto his face as he tries to assess the paths forking out in front of him. 

  
  



	48. Captain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW FIC POSTED as part of the Thorki Secret Santa 2019! Follow the link to read: 
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/21882241

Thor lays amidst the sterile hotel sheets listening to Tony and Brunnhilde snoring in their respective beds. They certainly seem to be sleeping easier than him. 

This day has felt like a giant step backwards. He’d really hoped that Natasha would be their wild card. That perhaps she would be able to get Loki to see sense. But, if anything, he seems even more unreachable now. 

Thor fingers the inguz bracelet on his wrist. It stings that Loki no longer wears his. Even though it’d be absolutely ridiculous if he did. It probably meant nothing to Loki, just one of the many gifts he’s gotten from faceless lovers. Besides, it probably doesn’t fit with ‘Lucky’s’ personal style. 

But the day of their four month anniversary is one of Thor’s most poignant memories from their time together. It’s still difficult to look back on it and try to understand that Loki’s reaction to the bracelets was just acting. It had been such a strange reaction. Those weren’t tears of joy. He’d completely broken down. Almost as though he were mourning something. 

Thinking about the bracelets sparks a thought in Thor’s head. The ring! He’d completely forgotten about it with everything else that’s been going on. He quietly gets up to blindly rummage through his things in the dark. Finally his fingers find the chain. He pulls it free and runs a thumb over the snake etchings. 

It’s such a small little thing. But Helbindi must have had some reason for giving it to him. Thor loops the chain around his neck and gets back in bed. Perhaps the night will help spark some brilliant ideas for how to get through to Loki. 

*******

Loki lays in bed and tries to drown out the snores of the man sprawled on top of him. He fingers the Inguz charm dangling from a braid on the underside of his hair. He’s noticed that Thor still wears his as well. He wonders what that means. 

He thinks he knows. 

The alarm goes off, loudly blaring  _ You Sexy Thing _ . Loki waits for En Dwi to mumble and grumble, roll off of him, and go straight back to snoring. Then Loki gets up and turns the alarm off himself, leaving En Dwi to a fate of sleeping in and being late for work. 

He pads out of the bedroom to get dressed and use the bathroom. Then he takes the elevator down to the sixth floor for a swim. Perhaps the cold water will help him come to some kind of decision. 

*******

The next day, Natasha calls a meeting at the hotel. They’ve been using Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde’s room as a base of operations. They even have a computer station in the corner filled with countless cords and gadgets where Tony and Bruce have been working to hack their way through Sakaar’s firewalls. 

Once they’re all gathered, Natasha gets straight to the point. “We need more people.” 

Thor blinks and looks around the room. “We already have seven. Is that not enough?”

Natasha shakes her head. “While everyone here is an asset, we have unfulfilled roles. For starters, we need an inside agent. Bruce is an excellent hacker and has inside information on Sakaar, but he no longer works there. We need someone who can get us inside. Someone with security clearance. The most obvious choice for this would be Bucky. Getting him would kill two birds with one stone: get an inside man to Sakaar as well as another inside agent in the Black Order. And converting Bucky would have the added bonus of potentially swaying Loki. If we can get the person who is most loyal to him to join with us, then Loki may finally see that we are not a group that is working against him.”

Thor shifts unhappily. He doesn’t like the idea. The relationship between Bucky and Loki still makes him itch. 

“That means we need to figure out how to convince Bucky to join us,” Natasha continues. 

Gamora snorts. “Good luck with that.”

“It won’t be easy,” Natasha allows, “but it will almost certainly be easier than convincing Loki.” 

“And how do you propose we do it?” Brunnhilde asks skeptically.

Natasha looks at Tony. “He used to work for you, Tony. Do you have any sway over him?”

“Ha, sorry no. I could barely remember the kid’s name to be honest. I just hired him as a favor for my friend, Steve. Guy was childhood friends with Bucky and ended up saving him after he was captured as a prisoner of war. Steve was Bucky’s captain when he got captured, so he always felt a ton of guilt about it.” 

Natasha patiently stays silent and watches Tony put the pieces together. 

“Oh, hey!” Tony snaps his fingers. “I should call Steve. He’s always been hyper protective of Bucky. If anyone could convince him, it’d be Steve.” 

Natasha smiles like a teacher congratulating a child on getting an addition problem correct. Thor has a sneaking suspicion that she was purposely guiding Tony toward that exact answer. He wonders just how much she already knows about all of them. 

“That’s an excellent idea, Tony. I will leave it to you to get in contact with Steve. See if you can get him to come to Miami. It would be best to have him appeal to Bucky in person.” 

Tony whips out his phone. “On it.” He gets up to walk out of the room as he hits number three on speed dial. 

An awkward silence falls once Tony leaves. Natasha stares at the wall, seemingly content to wait until Tony returns. Bruce crosses and uncrosses his legs. Brunnhilde picks at a hangnail. Gamora taps an uneven rhythm on the arm of her chair. Clint types away on his phone, texting someone. Thor clears his throat three times in as many minutes. 

Everyone but Natasha jumps when Tony bangs the door open. “The Captain’s in!”

Steve catches a flight that night and shows up at their hotel room early the next day. He and Tony engage in a manly hug and then he proceeds to solidly shake the hand of everyone else on the team. 

“What you people are doing here, it’s the right thing. This organization needs to be stopped. Only the worst sort of people would trap emotionally vulnerable innocents like Bucky and make them into criminals.” 

Natasha raises an eyebrow. “Natasha, ex-Black Order agent, recruiter of three emotionally vulnerable people, and still a criminal today.” She smiles. “Nice to meet you.”

Steve looks uncomfortable. “Er, sorry. Didn’t mean to offend.” 

Natasha doesn’t bother responding. 

Steve turns back to Tony. “So, where do we start?”

  
  



	49. The Ring

“Movie night!”

Loki blinks up at En Dwi from his sprawl on the chaise. “What?”

“Surprise, surprise. I invited your brother and his friend-ees over for a - a movie night.” 

Loki can’t quite formulate a response that doesn’t involve shouting ‘no’. So he just blinks again.

“Be excited.”

Loki quickly complies. “Oh, En! What a fun idea. I can’t wait. Donald of course just loves chick flicks. We’ll have to choose a super sappy one just for him.” 

En Dwi preens. “Yes, quite a brilliant idea, isn’t it? Bean bags, PJs, popcorn, those little twisty fruity gummy things. Mm, and we shall have to pick the perfect film. I leave that to you.” He pats Loki’s head and walks out the door. 

Loki drops his smile.

*******

“This is perfect,” Tony declares.

“Yeah,” Bruce agrees. “This movie night will give us the perfect opportunity to get Steve close to Bucky.” 

Gamora turns to Steve. “Fair warning. Bucky is really attached to Loki. It won’t be easy to talk him into this.” 

Steve nods assuredly. “I know him better than anyone. And he’s not a criminal. I’ll get him out if it’s the last thing I do.” 

Brunnhilde elbows Thor in the gut. “Hey, he sounds like you,” she gibes.

Thor frowns. He certainly hopes not. Steve sounds like a deluded sap.

*******

Loki flicks through streaming movie options without devoting any real attention to the task. His mind is too busy trying to predict what those menaces are going to try pulling tonight. Now that Nat and Clint are involved, they’re sure to be far more organized. 

He stops scrolling at the sight of a colorful title.  _ The Birdcage _ . One of Thor’s favorites. Loki had been pleasantly surprised by how much he enjoyed it. They watched it together three times during their time together. Loki remembers how Thor could mouth along to all the words. By the third time watching it, so could Loki. 

Without thinking too much on it, Loki selects the film and queues it up on the screen before heading out of the home theater to find En Dwi in the kitchen. 

“And what are we watching tonight, my Lucky Boy?” 

“ _ The Birdcage _ .” 

“The what-what? The foul prison? Don’t know it.” En Dwi makes an obnoxious purring noise. “Sounds kinky.”

Loki slinks forward to plaster himself against En Dwi’s side as the older man fills bowls with nuts, candies, and popcorn. “Oh, it’s the kinkiest.” 

“Now, now. None of that. Let’s save it for when we have a - an audience.” En Dwi chuckles. “I’m sure that - that brother of yours would certainly appreciate it.” 

Loki peels himself away and hops onto the counter instead. “Ew, En.” 

En Dwi pauses in his task to look at Loki. “I mean, really, really. You must see it,” he implores. 

Loki makes his eyes wide and innocent. “See what?”

En Dwi laughs delightedly. “Ah, pet, you poor naive thing. Your, mm, brother wants to do very, very wrong, naughty things to you.” 

Loki tilts his head. “What kind of things?” It’s bait and En Dwi clearly knows it. He sets the bag of pretzels down and steps in between Loki’s thighs. He puts a hand on either one and spreads them on the counter top as he leans forward to mouth at Loki’s jaw. “Things that only I am allowed to do.” 

En Dwi pulls on Loki’s loose pajama shirt until it’s hanging severely off one shoulder and leans in to suck a mark into the exposed skin. His hand slips into the back of Loki’s blue silk pajama pants to massage one cheek. Loki sinks one hand into En Dwi’s hair and the other over the front of his tented gold pajama pants. 

The elevator dings open and Korg’s high voice rings out. “Mr. Gast, Mr. Lucky! Your friends are here.” 

Loki and En Dwi look up from where they’re tangled on the counter to find that their audience has arrived. Korg beams at them like nothing’s out of order while behind him stand Thor, Tony, Brunnhilde, and - is that fucking Steve Rogers?

“Ah, hello,” En Dwi greets pleasantly without rearranging at all. “So glad you could make it.” 

Loki looks at the assembled guests and nearly laughs. Tony is slightly bug-eyed and unashamedly taking in the scene. Brunnhilde looks absolutely disgusted. Thor’s face has changed to an entirely new color pallet, a fascinating and surprisingly fetching combination of red and green. Steve looks like someone just peed on the American flag right in front of him. 

En Dwi releases a put-upon sigh, despite the fact that he was the one to invite them all, and reluctantly disentangles from Loki’s limbs. His pants are still spectacularly tented. “Well, I suppose we should, mm, get this party started. Oh, but it appears we have a - a new addition.” 

Loki hops down from the counter and walks straight up to Steve. It still brings him no small amount of pleasure that he can look down at the man. “I don’t believe we’ve met.” He grins tauntingly and sticks out a hand. “I’m Lucky.” 

Steve clears his throat and grudgingly takes Loki’s hand, shaking it once before dropping it. “Steve.”

Loki’s grin stretches wickedly. Ah, of course. Rogers and his honesty policy wouldn’t use an alias. 

Steve frowns openly. Loki suspects it must be deeply disconcerting for him to see sweet, lovely Elle like this. The thought makes Loki smile impossibly wider. The menaces’ plan for tonight is no longer a mystery. They clearly brought Steve here to appeal to Bucky. Ah, but they have another thing coming. 

“And I am En Dwi Gast. But you should know that already. I mean, it says it on the building.” He looks at Steve expectantly. 

"Ah, yes,” Steve stutters, distracted from glaring at Loki. “Mr. Gast, thank you for having us.” 

Loki turns his attention to the other three. Tony is glancing between Steve and Loki with an odd look on his face. Loki wonders if seeing Loki next to someone who was friends with Elle is odd for him. Brunnhilde merely looks like she’s tolerating the entire situation. Thor - Loki does a double take. 

What. The fuck.

Loki tears his gaze away from the ring to look at the face above it. Thor meets his stare. His expression reveals nothing. Loki forces his eyes to shrink back to their normal size and straightens his pajamas. He turns away from Thor, but he can still feel eyes on his back. 

The elevator dings open once more, revealing Topaz and Bucky. 

“Ah! There they are,” En Dwi delights. “Let movie night begin!”

  
  



	50. The Touch

So the ring most definitely means something. The look on Loki’s face when he saw it was confirmation enough for Thor. Whether it’s something that can actually help them in any way, Thor’s not so sure. 

They’re interrupted by the arrival of Bucky and Topaz. The look on Bucky’s face when he walks off the elevator and sees Steve is nothing short of panicked. Steve, on the other hand, looks like he’s just found his lost puppy. He beams at the two new arrivals. “Hi. I’m Steve.” 

Topaz looks at him blankly. Bucky still looks panicked. En Dwi cuts in. “This is Topaz and her bodyguard, uh, uh - Oh, it’s right on the tip of my tongue. Uh, uh, Edgar!” 

“Allen,” Loki corrects. 

“Allen, yes, yes. Anyway, he and Korg are just here to make sure you all don’t decide to kill us.” There’s an odd silence. “Now let’s be away to the theater. This way.”

Korg grabs up all the bowls of junk food while En Dwi and Loki lead them out of the main area, through a corridor, and into a room completely filled with bean bags and cushions, no actual furniture in sight. En Dwi hits a button and a large screen comes down from the ceiling. 

Loki, Korg, Topaz, and Bucky (who seems to have regained his cool composure) all step straight into the piles of cushions and choose their spots to sit. Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde glance at each other before awkwardly doing the same. Thor sits as close to Loki as can be justified in such a large space. Well, perhaps a bit closer than can really be justified. 

“Now, my Lucky Boy here has chosen our film for the night,” En Dwi announces. “It’s some mm - mysterious story of birds in captivity. Oooh, aaah. So grab your sugar-yums, settle in, and get comfy.” He wades into the cushions and clambors over Thor, then Loki, and then several more cushions to reach a furry yellow bean bag, which he promptly splays his entire body over. He hits a button on a small remote and the room goes dark. 

The first notes of ‘We are Family’ flow out of the speakers. 

No. It couldn’t be. Thor looks over at Loki. The other man stares stubbornly forward. Thor looks back at the screen. It definitely is. Loki knows this is one of Thor’s favorite movies. They watched it together multiple times. Did he choose it for a reason? And is it a good reason or a bad one? Perhaps Loki is making fun of Thor. It is a movie of secret spousal identity after all. But it’s a stretch. Maybe Loki just gained a liking for the movie after watching it several times. Still. He must have known the significance of choosing this movie specifically when Thor was coming. 

Thor absently fiddles with the ring hanging from his neck as his thoughts whirl through seemingly endless spirals. 

*******

Loki puts so much energy into watching the film to distract himself from the stressful situation he’s in that he succeeds. The film is just as good as he remembers and brings back memories of sitting in bed with Thor and watching it on a laptop while braiding each other’s hair. 

“Actually it’s perfect. I just never realized John Wayne walked like that.” Loki and Thor quote the line aloud in unison along with Robin Williams on screen. Loki laughs and glances over at Thor. He’s gazing back at Loki, a look of wonder on his face. He seems happier than Loki has seen him in a long time. Happiness has always been the best look on Thor. 

Loki abruptly remembers where they are and who they are. He snaps his eyes back to the screen, ignoring the fact that Thor is still looking at him. 

Shit, and he’d been doing so well. He thought he was done breaking character. Now Thor probably sees right through him. And anyone else who saw the besotted way he just looked at Thor. 

He glances subtley to the right and sees that En Dwi is looking at him too. Fuck, not good. And so is Tony, isn’t he? Or is he? And Brunnhilde? He can’t tell, but they must be. He can’t see Bucky, but he’s probably looking at him too. And Steve is probably glaring straight into the back of his head. Fuck, everyone is staring at him. They must be. Everyone is just waiting for him to step out of line -

A soft pressure on the side of his thigh makes Loki jerk his head up. It’s Thor. He’s no longer looking at Loki. He’s just pressing his leg ever so gently against Loki’s. It’s a familiar gesture from what feels like forever ago, one that Thor would offer whenever he noticed Loki getting anxious. A quiet, discreet, ‘I’m here’. As it always did before, the contact grounds Loki and brings him back to reality. He looks around again. No one is looking at him. 

He doesn’t move away from the touch. 

*******

Thor is beginning to feel a little faint from holding his breath. Loki hasn’t moved away from the point of contact Thor initiated. 

Loki’s breaths had been quickening and he had tilted his chin to his chest, the same signs of discomfort he’d always exhibited when social situations got to ge a little overwhelming back when they were together. 

And Thor’s calming gesture seems to be having the same effect as it always did in the past. Loki’s breaths evened back out almost instantly. Now he’s watching the screen along with the rest of them. 

And he hasn’t moved away from Thor. The place where Loki’s silk covered leg meets Thor’s flannel swathed one feels like home. It feels like nights spent in bed watching old movies on a laptop and combing each other’s hair. It feels like zig zagging through the park while their fingers dance together, pinkies twirling about thumbs, spinning each other’s wedding rings. It feels like sitting on the balcony as their wet hair dries in curls and their toes run the lengths of the other’s calves. It feels like lying face to face and caressing cheekbones, tan skin against pale, yin and yang, summer and winter. 

Thor finally breaths and relaxes his leg further into the long, lean one resting alongside his own. Loki still doesn’t move away. 

  
  



	51. A Friend

The minute the lights turn on, Loki pulls away from Thor, stands, and sweeps out of the room. Thor is pulled to follow by forces beyond his control. He ignores En Dwi’s comment about Lucky desperately needing a piss and gets up to exit the room. 

Thor closes the door behind himself and looks around the penthouse. He walks into three different rooms before he finds Loki in what appears to be a music room. Just visible past the white grand piano, Loki sits in a bay window nook with his feet up on the seat.

Thor enters slowly, quietly closing the door behind him. Loki doesn’t look away from where he’s gazing out at the dark city.

“Are you okay?”

Loki hunches. “Why,” he hisses, “do you keep asking me that?”

There’s an odd quality to the words, like they’ve been filtered through ice. It makes Thor wonder if he’s the one clawing at a frozen ceiling to escape the frigid water or the one looking down at the drowning person beneath the frozen surface. 

“Because I care what the answer is.” He’s standing just behind Loki now. The sense memory of their legs pressing ever so gently together still fresh in his mind, Thor extends a hand and lightly, lightly touches Loki’s shoulder blade. 

Loki tenses, straightening from his hunch. Thor can see the reflection of Loki’s face in the dark glass now. There are tears streaming down his cheeks. 

Thor realizes he’s the one carrying the pickaxe that can break the ice. 

He releases a punched out breath, bending with the impact, kneeling, and throwing his arms around Loki’s shoulders. He doubles his forearms over each other and drags Loki to him, burying his face in the pale neck. Loki remains slack as his back presses into Thor’s chest. It feels so damn good as it rips Thor’s heart out through his ribs. 

Wetness drips from Loki’s chin onto Thor’s skin and tremors bolt through Thor that shake them both with the force of thunder. Thor holds Loki all the tighter, hoping to tether them together through this perfect storm. 

All that Thor has observed since finding Loki in Miami has finally reached a culmination this night. He finally thinks he understands at least one thing: Loki is overwhelmed. They had all assumed it impossible because he juggles people’s lives for a living and always seems to get what he wants. But they had forgotten that he isn’t some superhuman, villainous or otherwise. He’s human and humans all have their limits. 

And Loki has reached his. 

What Thor can’t figure out is why Loki won’t give in. Why won’t he help them? Why would he choose to stay loyal to a person who would have him killed if he stepped out of line? Is it the money? Somehow, that seems too simple a motivation for a person so complex as Loki. Is it sheer stubbornness? That too feels like an inadequate answer. Is it truly because he feels love for this tyrannical mad man who he claims as his father? But surely someone as intelligent as Loki can see that someone like that is incapable of loving in return? Perhaps he feels that the approval of Thanos is the closest thing to love he will ever have. Perhaps he truly believes himself to be unlovable. 

Thor remembers the night at the club, when he and Loki shut themselves away in a closet. Loki told him then that people want one of two things from him: to punish him or to fuck him. It occurs to Thor that perhaps Loki simply doesn’t trust them. Doesn’t trust Thor. Maybe the way to get through to him is to prove once and for all that Thor is here for neither of those reasons. 

Thor’s mind returns to when he first met Loki back in London. How he promised then that he would respect Loki's wishes and they could just be friends. He did it once, he can do it again. For Loki.

“Loki.”

The man in his arms stiffens defensively. Thor holds tighter. 

“I’m not here to punish you. And I--” A tear slips down his own cheek and he hides it in Loki’s shoulder. “And I’m not here to try and get you back.” 

Loki relaxes minutely in his arms and it feels to Thor like the relief of rejection. Like giving up a borrowed part of himself so that it can return to its rightful owner. 

He coughs to hide a sniffle. “You and I have been hurt by the same person. That should make us allies.” Composing himself, Thor lifts his head to meet Loki’s eyes in the glass reflection and smiles. “I would like to be your friend.” 

*******

Loki stares into Thor’s reflected eyes in the window. Friend? Thor wants to be his… friend? 

The words are surprisingly soothing. No one has ever asked to be Loki’s friend. No one has ever liked him enough to want to be his friend without sex or manipulation involved. 

Loki’s first instinct is to believe that Thor is lying, just trying to fool Loki to get him into his bed or, more likely, a noose. Or just trying to recruit him as a tool against Thanos. But he knows Thor. And as much as he tries to tell himself that Thor is capable of such maliciousness, he knows it to be untrue. Loki always knew that Thor was far too good for him. And he was right. 

But Thor doesn’t want him back. He just wants to be his friend. And that, perhaps, Loki can manage. 

He swallows and gently reaches up to disentangle Thor’s arms. Once freed, he turns to face the other man. Thor sits back on his heels, looking for all the world like a dog awaiting a scolding. It’s so endearing that it tempts Loki to smile. So he does. 

Thor’s returning smile is tentative, but genuine. It makes Loki feel giddy. He looks at Thor with wonder, excitement tickling at the edge of his vision. Something like mania, something like exhaustion, something like love making his tongue loose. “I’ve never had a friend before.” 

Thor’s face lights up. “Then I am honored to be the first.” He claps a hand on Loki’s shoulder, a less intimate echo of the way he would once clasp the back of Loki’s neck. It feels like the right amount of closeness, the amount that Loki can handle right now. So he returns the gesture, enjoying the feeling of comradery and acceptance. 

Glancing at the ring around Thor’s neck, Loki thinks briefly of Helbindi. He thinks he’d be proud that Loki finally made a friend. 

  
  



	52. Captor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry guys, I don't hate Steve!! Just like everyone else in this fic, he's dealing with his own set of circumstances.

The sound of voices outside the music room reminds Loki that they are not the only two people in the universe. 

“We should get back out there. En Dwi will start to wonder whether I’ve finally given into my brother’s wiles.” Loki laughs and it feels right for the first time in months. 

Thor laughs too and it feels like being a team. 

They exit the room and follow the voices down the hall to the game room. It becomes quickly apparent that a heated argument is taking place behind the shut door. They glance at each other and pick up their pace. Just before they reach the door, it’s flung open and Bucky storms out. Loki and Thor step to either side as Bucky marches away from the game room, seemingly blind to the people in his path. Loki turns to watch Bucky’s back as he disappears down the hall. 

“What--?” Loki cuts off and looks back to Thor when the larger man’s hand finds his shoulder again. But Thor’s not looking at him. Loki follows his gaze to find Steve standing in the doorway to the game room. He’s staring at Loki with murder in his eyes. 

Loki narrows his own swollen eyes. “What did you do to Bucky?” 

Steve snarls and it’s the most hostile expression Loki’s ever seen on the kind man’s face. “I should be asking you that. You’ve really screwed him up, haven’t you?” He stalks toward Loki. 

“Steve, enough,” Thor intercepts, stepping between them. 

It doesn’t deter Steve from continuing. “What kind of sadist are you to ruin someone’s life so completely? To manipulate people this way? You poison everything you touch. You’re a parasite, a tyrant, a villian.”

Loki shivers.

“Steve,” Thor rumbles. “Stop.” 

“I know your type. I saw them at war. I saw them leading the prison camp where Bucky was held captive. Where he was tortured. You’re just the same. You’re nothing more than his newest captor.”

Loki flinches. 

“Steve!”

“But I got him out once and I’ll get him out again. Because unlike you, Bucky is worth saving.”

Loki’s head snaps back with the force of the words. 

Thor grabs steve by the collar and slams him against the wall. “Shut up!”

“Stop protecting him. Everyone knows he’s got you wrapped around his finger more than anyone. He’s poison, Thor. Can’t you see that? He’s going to be the death of you.” 

Loki doesn’t wait around to hear Thor’s response. He turns and runs. 

*******

“Don’t you dare speak to him that way,” Thor growls straight into Steve’s face. 

“He’s a criminal and a coward. Why can’t you see it? He’s not worthy of your devotion.” 

Thor shoves him harder into the wall. “You’re wrong.” 

Steve snorts. “Oh, really? Look behind you.” 

Thor furrows his brow and glances back. Loki’s not there. Fuck. Thor was finally getting through to him and now...

“See? He’s just going to leave you, again and again. That’s what men like him do, they hurt people. They don’t change. Thor, I’m on your side here. I’m trying to help you.” 

With one last growl, Thor shoves himself away from Steve and goes after Loki. He needs to fix this. 

*******

Loki curses himself. He’s an idiot. How could he falter so severely? Did he really think he could just drop the Order and switch sides because Thor offered, what, friendship? 

Even if Thor could accept him, the rest of his group never would. Steve is right. Loki is poison. He destroys everything he touches. The only place such a person can survive is the Black Order. 

Loki finds Bucky on the balcony off of the master suite. He steps out into the chilly air and examines the miserable lines of Bucky’s back. 

“What did he say to you?”

Bucky glances over his shoulder from where he leans on the railing. “What do you think?” He clears his throat and enters into a deep voiced impersonation of the captain. “I’m here to save you, Bucky. You’re lost, Bucky. Come home, Bucky.” He scoffs and drops the voice. “He can’t seem to understand that home isn’t a place that exists for me. The place he’s talking about, it was never home to me. Not really.” 

“I know. That’s why I brought you with me.” Loki leans against the railing beside Bucky and looks out at the cityscape. “Did I - did I make the right decision?” He looks at Bucky pleadingly. 

Bucky’s brow furrows, then smooths in realization. He reaches a hand up to cup Loki’s cheek. “You didn’t make the decision. I did. You offered me a chance and I chose to take it.” He brushes away a treacherous tear that escapes Loki’s eye. “Don’t listen to Steve. He’s too self righteous for his own good sometimes.” 

Loki swallows a couple times before he can grasp the question he wants to ask. “Do you miss him?”

Bucky smiles. “Of course.”

Loki nods. And nods again. And then Bucky’s pulling him into his arms and he’s crying into an embrace for the second time that night. 

*******

Thor stares out the glass door of the master bedroom at the two men embracing on the balcony. They look like two people that understand each other. 

Thor knows that as much as he may love Loki, he’s never truly understood him. But Bucky does. That much is clear. Thor and Steve are the blundering fools trying to push their way inside of a space that’s not meant for them. It’s a space that only Loki and Bucky have the key to. 

It hurts like hell, but Thor already promised himself that he would be Loki’s friend. And Loki’s friend wouldn’t pout over Loki finding someone else. He would ensure that the person Loki found is one that will do what’s best for Loki.

So Thor sets out to find Steve again, intent on committing himself to making that happen. 

  
  



	53. Trauma

The air in the room is heavy as they finish relaying the story of movie night to Natsha, Clint, and Bruce. 

“So you really think Loki was going to join us?” Bruce asks.

Thor nods. “I do.” He didn’t tell them everything, just enough to give them context. “But I’m pretty sure any progress I made has been completely reversed.” 

“I’m sorry, Thor,” Steve laments. “I shouldn’t have been so harsh.”

Thor sighs. “Steve, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I let my emotions get in the way of the bigger picture. It's just, I remember what Loki did to Tony when he was Elle. He ruined my friend's life. And he didn't just hurt Tony. Elle was my friend too and I lost her. Then I heard Bucky’s insistence of his loyalty to Loki and all I could see was the same thing happening to him as what I watched happen to Tony. And what I know happened to you and Brunnhilde as well. Loki has a long history of making people care for him and then ripping their lives apart in thanks. Do I stand by what I said? Yes. Loki is not a good guy. What he's been through is terrible, but it doesn't absolve him of everything he's done. That said, I realize we need him if we’re going to take down the Black Order and that I’ve set us back from reaching that goal. And I know I hurt you with my words too, which was never my intention. I was wrong to say the things I did. Thor, man, I’m sorry.”

Thor nods in acknowledgement. He’s still not over the things Steve said, but holding onto his anger will do them no good. And he understands Steve's anger, he really does. He even feels some of it himself. So in favor of productivity, Thor changes the subject. “What’s our next move, then? It looks like we’re going to need a little more than a ‘please and thank you’ to get Bucky to join us.”

“Yeah, when he stormed past us after talking with you, Steve, he looked pissed,” Brunnhilde comments. 

Steve hangs his head. “I don’t know. I’ve never seen him like this. It was almost like talking to a completely different person.” He looks up at the assembled group. “But I refuse to give up.”

“I need you to get me a face to face with Bucky.” 

Steve looks at Natasha in surprise. “Why? No offense, but are you really the right person to get through to him? You’ve never even met.” 

Natasha’s face is unreadable. “Just get me an audience with him. You are likely the only one who will convince him to step away from Loki long enough for me to talk to him. Get him to talk to me and I promise you that he will join us.” 

Thor only puzzles all the more when he catches the way Clint grimaces at Natasha’s words. 

*******

Loki sits on an overstuffed chair outside an oversized dressing room inside a store full of overpriced clothes on a street filled with overrated businesses. He’s about ready to hang himself with a coat hanger. 

“Ta-da-da-da,” En Dwi twirls out of the dressing room. “Ah, now this - this one is really great. Something really special. Mm, wouldn’t you say?”

Loki plasters on a smile. “Oh, En, you look so handsome. I can’t wait to be on your arm when you wear that at the next party. 

“Mm, yes. Good luck outshining me.” En Dwi saunters back into the dressing room. 

Loki slumps back in his chair and resigns himself to an afternoon of boredom. 

“Hey, Lackey.” 

Loki jumps and swivels in his chair. He narrows his eyes. “Brunnhilde. What are you doing here?”

“She’s not the only one, Sugar.” Tony walks up beside her. 

Loki knows what that means. Thor must be here as well. He looks past them expectantly, awaiting the third muskateer’s arrival. 

“Sorry to disappoint,  Francesca . Casanova's not here.”

Loki frowns. Thor’s not with them? Then just what mischief is he getting up to? 

*******

Steve signals for Thor and Gamora to begin their search through the store. Tony and Brunnhilde must have successfully distracted Loki. Gamora goes left to find Korg and Thor goes right. He spots Topaz and heads over to occupy her. 

“Hey, fancy running into you here.” 

She looks at him blankly. 

“Um, you, uh, you remember me right?”

“Dillon.” 

“Donald, actually.” 

“You look like a Dillon. Too furry to be a Donald.” 

Thor glances desperately over his shoulder. Has Steve made any progress yet? 

*******

“What are you up to?” 

“What, just because the big guy isn’t with us means we can’t be friendly? Aw, Morticia, you wound me.”

“We were just out shopping,” Brunnhilde throws in. “We happened to see you and decided to say ‘hi’.”

Loki just blinks at them. “You’re in a kimono shop.” 

Tony laughs loudly enough that Loki wonders if En Dwi will hear it. “Yeah, totally. I’ve been wanting one for years.”

Loki smirks and makes himself comfortable in the plush chair. If they want to distract him then they’re going to have to work for it. “Well then, give us a show.” 

Tony pales as Loki eyes a scandalously short red kimono.

*******

Thor finally gets the signal from Steve. He quickly wraps up his conversation with Topaz, “It’s been lovely seeing you. Can’t wait until we can chat again. Yes, you may call me Dillon if you like,” and makes his way toward the entrance. On the way, he catches a glance of Loki and Brunnhilde laughing as Tony stands haughtily in front of them wearing a shockingly short kimono. It’s nice to see Loki laughing with friends, even if he doesn’t know that’s what they are. 

Once Thor is out the door, he strides quickly toward the limo parked by the curb. He opens the door and ducks inside. Gamora left it idling there until En Dwi and Loki are ready to move onto the next store. Hopefully Brunnhilde and Tony will be able to postpone that for some time yet. 

Natasha is sitting to Thor’s right. Steve and Bucky are sitting across from them. Bucky looks like he’s just waiting for an excuse to shoot someone. Thor wonders how Steve convinced him to even come to this meeting and hear them out. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Bucky. I’m Natasha.”

“I know who you are.” Bucky’s voice is low and monotone. He sounds like the merciless killer he’d been when Thor first met him. 

“So Loki’s told you about me.” 

“Everyone has told me about you. You’re the Black Widow, the traitor of the Black Order.”

“And did Loki tell you what he is to me?”

That gives Bucky pause. “He… no.” 

Natasha smiles fondly. “He is my little brother. I had as much of a role in his upbringing as Thanos. Loki is my family.” 

Bucky frowns. “If you care about him then why would you be doing this? Why can’t you just let us be?” 

“Because you help the ones you care about. And helping someone sometimes means going against their wishes.” 

Bucky shakes his head. 

“Bucky, you care about Loki too, don’t you?” Natasha asks. 

Bucky gives a halting nod, as though he’s hesitant to give her that information.

“And do you want to help him?”

“He doesn’t need--” Bucky snaps his mouth shut and blows a breath out through his nose. He looks horribly torn. 

Steve lays a gentle hand on Bucky’s good arm and the Black Order agent relaxes minutely, glancing at Steve with a softened expression. When he speaks again, his menacing exterior has dropped. “Yes.”

Natasha just looks at Bucky for a long time. When she speaks, it’s kind. “Why do you care about him, Bucky?”

“Because we’re the same.” Bucky speaks as though the words cut his mouth. “No one else has ever understood like he does.” 

Natasha nods. “You are much alike. You have both been hurt in ways that will haunt you for the rest of your lives and in ways that no one who has not experienced the same could possibly hope to grasp.” She takes a fortifying breath. It’s a surprisingly transparent show of nerves from the stoic woman. “But has Loki told you what it was that hurt him so profoundly?”

Thor thinks of the story Natasha told them of Loki’s past, of all the hurt it contained. 

Bucky twitches minutely. “He started working jobs young.” He doesn’t seem completely convinced by his own answer. 

“Yes, that was certainly a part of it. But it wasn’t the biggest part.” 

Thor looks sharply over at Natasha. What? But that was certainly the primary focus of the story she told them. 

Natasha continues. “Bucky, your trauma came from being tortured as a prisoner of war. Loki’s trauma came from Thanos.”

Bucky swallows. “What did he - what did Thanos do to Loki?” 

Gamora gazes at him sadly. “It’s not just what he’s done. It’s what he’s still doing.” 

The two of them stare at each other long and hard until Bucky’s face slowly resolves into a look of horror. “No.” 

Thor feels his stomach drop. He has no idea what has just passed between the two people in front of him, but he knows that whatever realization Bucky’s just had is not a good one. Whatever Thanos has done to Loki, it’s even worse than Thor thought. 

Bucky straightens his shoulders, posture returning to the menacing killer. It’s not dissimilar to watching Loki switch between his personas. When Bucky speaks, his voice is strong and monotone once more. 

“I’ll help you.”

  
  



	54. Some Fucking Rescue Mission

“I’ll help you.” 

As soon as he’s spoken the words, Bucky is up from his seat and opening the door. He’s gone before it can even sink in that they’ve succeeded. Bucky is on the team. 

Thor can’t really focus on the accomplishment, though. He’s far too distracted by the words that convinced Bucky. 

He looks over at Natasha. “What the hell was that?”

She doesn’t even react. Thor’s temper spikes. “Natasha--”

“Hoo-ee! That was some heavy stuff.” 

Thor, Steve, and Natasha all blink at each other. It wasn’t any of them who spoke. 

The partition lowers to reveal Korg sitting in the front passenger seat. “Hey guys. It’s only me. No need to be scared. Unless there’s something large and terrifying behind me. In which case we should all be terrified.” 

They all stare at the oblivious bodyguard in horror. He was supposed to be inside shopping with the others. Gamora was meant to be distracting him while Thor distracted Topaz. Speaking of, where is Gamora? 

“Korg,” Thor starts tentatively, “just how much of that conversation did you hear?”

“Oh, eh, pretty much all of it. I drifted off a little in the middle there when it got a bit boring.” 

“If you are a man of honor, you will not repeat what you’ve heard here today,” Steve appeals. 

“Oh, sure thing,” Korg nods agreeably. “I’ll only talk about it when it’s just us hanging out. By the way, what are you guys doing this weekend?” 

“Korg, I’m Natasha and I’m a friend of Loki’s.

“Oh, sure. You’re invited too.” 

Natasha nods patiently in acknowledgement. “Korg, do you understand what you overheard?”

“Well, you guys are going to help Mr. Lucky, right? Anyone doing that is a-okay in my book. But, uh, I don’t really know what this whole spooky Order thing is about. Sounds exciting though. Hey, maybe we can plot their righteous downfall when we hang out this weekend. I’ve always wanted to lead a revolt.”

Natasha, Steve, and Thor look at each other in surprise. Well, of all the people they could have been caught by, it would seem Korg is by far the least disastrous. 

Natasha smiles mischievously at Korg. “What if I told you we were already hoping to do just that?”

Korg inhales sharply and beams. “The revolution has begun!” 

*******

They do end up ‘hanging out’ that weekend. Korg and Bucky join the rest of the team when they meet in the hotel room to discuss what their next steps will be. The two newest members arrive with entirely opposite attitudes. Bucky glares at every person present, projecting an air of ‘talk to me and I will rip your arm off with my teeth.’ Korg, on the other hand, looks like a kid at a lollipop festival. 

Thor looks around at the assembled team and marvels at how far they’ve come. This started out with just Tony, Brunnhild, and him. Now they have nine members, including Sakaar and Black Order insiders. It sparks a flare of hope that they could actually have a chance against Thanos. 

As usual, Natasha starts the meeting off. “Thank you all for being here. Let’s begin with a status update. Tony, Bruce, have you made any progress with hacking Sakaar?”

Tony is practically vibrating in his seat. “Yes! We most certainly have.” 

“Well, we got into one of their systems anyway,” Bruce adds. 

“Okay, so we’re not into the part we need yet,” Tony flaps a hand dismissively, “but we’re making progress. I mean, come on. Who else could have pulled it off but the two of us?”

Bruce smiles fondly and a little placatingly. 

“Progress is good,” Natasha agrees. “Clint, how is surveillance going?”

“Not much to report. I haven’t observed Loki doing much beyond entertaining En Dwi. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he wasn’t even looking for the Soul.”

Natasha frowns but nods again. “Korg, you spend a lot of time around Loki as his bodyguard. Have you noticed him doing anything out of the ordinary? Anything suspicious?” 

Korg scratches his head. “Ah, Mr. Lucky - you sure do pronounce his name strangely, by the way - he’s a pretty slippery guy. I lose track of him a lot. He could be doing anything during that time.” 

Bruce quietly explains to Korg once more that ‘Lucky’ is an alias, not an alternate pronunciation of ‘Loki’. Meanwhile, Natasha moves on. “What about you, Bucky? What can you tell us about the progress Loki’s made in finding the Soul?”

Bucky remains slumped down in his chair with his arms crossed. For a moment, Thor thinks he won’t even answer. “He is required to report to Thanos as soon as he’s found the gem. As far as I know, he hasn’t reported to Thanos anytime recently.”

Natasha nods. “At least he’s not too far ahead of us then. That buys us some time. Bruce, you keep working on hacking their systems. Tony, you can help when you’re not busy with other duties. Clint will stay on surveillance duty. Steve, I think we should keep you and Loki separate, so you will help me with keeping everyone organized. The rest of you will be focused solely on recruiting Loki.

“Gamora and Korg will be our inside agents. You two are responsible for finding openings and getting us access to Loki.” They both nod. “Thor, Tony, Brunnhilde, you three will be responsible for appealing to Loki the same as you’ve been doing.” They nod as well.

“Bucky, you will be responsible for subtly supporting the three of them. Do not let Loki know yet that you’ve joined us. Start off slow, gently pushing Loki in the right direction. Once he’s starting to question his loyalty to Thanos is when we will tell him you’ve changed sides.” She looks around at everyone in turn. “Any questions?”

Korg raises his hand. “Yes, um, do we get badges?”

After the meeting, Thor finds Bucky smoking on the balcony of their hotel room. The man seems to have an affinity for balconies, Thor muses. 

Bucky doesn’t turn to face Thor when he walks up behind him but before Thor can say anything, Bucky beats him to it. 

“You all think you’re on some fucking rescue mission.” He punctuates the sentence with a tendril of smoke. Thor can’t see his eyes but he imagines they’re still drawn in the same glare that he wore all through the meeting. 

“And what do you think?”

“I think without the Order Loki will go insane.” Bucky flicks his cigarette over the railing. “So will I.”

“Then why are you helping us?”

Bucky turns to face him. Thor was wrong. The man’s eyes look merely tired, resigned. “Because I’ve seen too many bruises around Loki’s throat to continue doing nothing.” 


	55. The Beach

Loki awakes to a knock on the bedroom door. That will be Korg giving him a wake up call to get up and be ready for lunch with En Dwi and the shareholders. “Come in.”

It’s obvious there’s been a new development the moment Korg walks in the room. “Good morning, Mr. Loki!” 

He blinks at Korg, hoping he misheard that. “What did you say?”

“I said good morning to you, Mr. Loki. And a wonderful morning it is. Just perfect for making new friends.” 

“Oh, dear god. Not you too?” Loki rubs his temples. “Lucky. My name is Lucky. If you’re going to join that group of imbeciles, you can at least do me the favor of not blowing my cover. You’ve already given yourself away to me.”

Korg rubs the back of his neck. “Oh, yeah. Sorry about that Mr. Lucky. But hey, now that you know you might as well join us too!” 

Loki groans and pulls a pillow over his face. Maybe he’ll get lucky and suffocate. 

*******

Thor pulls at the waistband of the single garment he wears. He feels wretchedly uncomfortable. “Can I please have my shirt back?”

“No can do, Hammer Time. We need to strap up with every tool in our figurative arsenal. Your manly sex appeal is one of our sharpest weapons.” The quirk of Tony’s grin makes Thor’s eyebrow twitch. 

“I’m pretty sure Loki is with Bucky now. I don’t think my ‘sex appeal’ is going to be very successful.” Thor huffs and adds quietly, “Besides, when we were together I was less--” He trails off and gestures lamely at his soft midsection. 

Tony rolls his eyes. “Come on, big guy. Er, regular size guy. Oh, you know what, no, you’re big, okay? You’re tall, muscular, and a little chubby. You’ve still got more going for you than most guys. Quit your whining already and grab your flip flops. Gamora’s here, time to go.”

Thor frowns after his friend. He grabs another T-shirt and throws it in his bag before following. 

*******

“--and I, uh, I of course won the game. I am terribly good at tho-those games. You know those sort. First hand, hmm. Yes, but they didn’t.”

Loki closes his eyes against the bright sun and blocks out En Dwi’s meandering voice. A breeze caresses his bared skin, sparking a fantasy. He imagines a strong wind gusting along the seafront, uprooting a lonely beach umbrella, twirling it cheerfully through the salty air, and sending its sandy stake straight through En Dwi’s heart. The bloody point would stop just short of Loki’s lemonade, a pinwheel of color fanning out behind En Dwi’s slumped form. Loki smiles at the image. 

A bony hand shakes him from his fantasy and he opens his eyes. He’s rather disappointed at the lack of dripping red. 

“Pet, I do believe that is your, uh, brother.”

Loki bolts up from his sprawl, fantasy forgotten. Spotting Thor isn’t difficult. The man is larger than every other person on the beach, his golden head floating atop a sea of drabber, shorter creatures. His bronze skin seems to shine. And oh, there is so much of it. Loki unconsciously reaches up to wipe imaginary drool from his lip. 

Then Thor spots him and a grin that threatens to overpower the sweltering midday sun overtakes his stupidly handsome face. Loki unconsciously grins back. Then his stomach roils as he remembers that seeing Thor here is not a good thing. 

“En, dear, I’d better go greet him. He’s going to trample half the poor sunbathers in his path if I don’t interfere.” 

En Dwi chuckles and waves him off with a flick of his wrist. Loki stands and swiftly weaves through the crowd to get to what he now notices is the complete set: the menaces three. At least Steve isn’t with them. He intercepts their path and stops them from advancing closer to En Dwi. 

“Can I not have a single day of peace?” he hisses just loud enough to be heard over the hubbub of the beach. Waiting for a response that never comes, he instead watches as Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde all track their eyes down his bare torso, tiny rainbow swim trunks, and exposed legs. He fights the urge to squirm, finding it difficult to be imposing whilst dressed in the equivalent of a skittles bag. 

He snaps his fingers in Thor’s face. “Up here.” The larger man blushes and crosses his arms across his chest. Loki wonders if he’s attempting to tempt Loki by displaying his thickly corded arms. Loki forces his gaze resolutely to Thor’s face, determined to not fall for the blatant bait. He paints his face in an ugly sneer. “Leave. I’m done with these paltry games.” 

Thor is still averting his gaze, arms folded over his broad chest. Brunnhilde answers instead. “Who says we’re here for you? We flew all the way from Norway. We might as well get a trip to the beach out of it.” 

Loki’s mind catches on the words. Norway? So they really did go and see Loki’s pathetic beginnings first hand. He swallows a cringe and chances a peek at Thor, expecting to again see the rage from the night of the birthday party. Instead, Thor is still looking away, grimacing. He appears as though he’d rather be anywhere else, a complete flip flop from his initial sunny smile. Loki’s stomach rolls. It looks like Thor’s rage has given way to plain disgust. Disgust with Loki. Wretched Loki. It’s a good thing Steve shocked him back to his senses the other night. It would seem Thor has already figured out that Loki isn’t worth the friendship he offered. 

Fighting back his spiraling thoughts, Loki barks a laugh. He’s sure there isn’t anything funny about the situation but he doesn’t know what else to do. Laughter is armor. It shows you to be unbothered. Hopefully. “You all think you’re so clever and secretive. But I have you all figured out.” 

Tony lifts an eyebrow. “And just what is it that you think you’ve figured out?”

“I know you convinced him to join you.” That gets Thor’s attention. His eyes snap up to bore through Loki. His gaze is like a scald. Loki revels in it. “I don’t see what use he’ll be to you, though,” Loki dismisses. “The bumbling fool can’t even keep track of me.” 

Tony frowns. “You don’t seem terribly upset at losing him.” 

Loki laughs. “Why should I be? He was never of any real use.”

“Don’t you,” Thor hesitates, “care about him?”

Now Loki’s getting confused. Why would they think he would care so much about Korg? He’s just some twat that En Dwi hired in a position they’d hoped Bucky would get. 

Wait a minute.

If Loki was plotting against the Order, Korg isn’t the one he would have focused on converting. No, there is a far more advantageous prospect. Loki looks back at the blanket where En Dwi, Topaz, Korg, and Bucky sit. Bucky is already looking back at him. He looks wretched. Guilty. 

Loki slowly turns back to the three people in front of him. As he looks at each of them and evaluates their expressions, he can feel the blood draining from every vessel in his face. 

“You don’t mean Korg.” 


	56. Tell Me

Loki is driving himself mad. 

Their large beach blanket is currently occupied by En Dwi, Topaz, Korg, Bucky, Thor, Tony, Brunhilde, and himself. Loki is trying to remember to be Lucky while internally all he can focus on is analyzing every look and move Bucky makes. 

The menaces had played dumb when Loki tried to assess whether they’d gotten to Bucky. He is almost certain they meant Bucky, not Korg, though. But Loki can’t think of a single reason why Bucky would have agreed to help them. He has no interest in leaving the Order. 

Unless Steve was enough to sway him. 

“Hey, Lucky. Will you put sunscreen on my back?” Tony wiggles the bottle in front of Loki’s nose. 

He answers by means of glaring. 

“Yeesh, all you had to say was no.”

Tony ends up getting Topaz to apply his sunscreen. Meanwhile, Brunnhilde is chumming it up with En Dwi, and isn’t that the most disturbing thing Loki’s ever seen. Thor, though, is just lounging quietly on the edge of the blanket. He’s put a shirt on now. Loki can at least be relieved to be free of that distraction. 

Bucky’s facial expression is back to normal, but that doesn’t mean anything. He’s been getting better at concealing his true thoughts and feelings. Loki is the one who’s been teaching him that skill. He’s been so proud with the progress his little disciple has been making. Now it’s just infuriating. And Loki can’t just sit here any longer. 

“En, I'm going swimming.”

“Of course, pet. Mm, take Korg with you.”

“No. I can’t be seen with him. Really, you shouldn’t let him wear that. Or anything else that shows any skin. Including his face.” Loki makes a show of his consideration. “Give me Bucky. At least he’s passable.” 

“But my dear, then Topaz will be without a guard.”

“She can have Korg. Permanently if she likes.”

“Oh, but Mr. Lucky sir,” Korg cuts in, his soprano even higher than usual. “Bucky can’t do that thing where I lift you up and throw you in the water. You know, like we do in Mr. Gast’s pool. You see, Bucky’s just too small to lift you. And that arm, aw. Poor guy. Guess you’ll have to keep me.” 

Loki rolls his eyes. “Bucky, come here.” Bucky complies. Loki lets his eyes cut sharper into him than necessary. “Pick me up.” Without hesitation, Bucky hooks his prosthetic around Loki’s waist and winds his good arm under his legs, lifting him in an effortless bridal carry. “See, he’s plenty strong.” Loki loops his arms around Bucky’s neck. “Now take me to the water.” 

Bucky walks Loki away, leaving the menaces three and En Dwi’s group behind. “Have fun with Korg, Topaz!” Loki doesn’t need to look back to see the unimpressed look on the serious woman’s face. He also doesn’t need to look to see Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde’s wary expressions. 

Once they reach the water, well out of earshot or eyesight of the rest of their group, Loki sneers. “Let me down, put me down, _this instant_!” 

Bucky complies awkwardly and steps back to give Loki a wide berth. 

“Would you care to explain to me why those menaces seem to think you’re on their side all of a sudden? ”

Bucky blinks, swallows, clears his throat. His voice doesn’t seem to be forthcoming. 

Loki feels like he’s drowning. He needs Bucky to tell him that he’s still his. Something has to be. “I thought you were the one person I could count on to be on my side.”

“I’m always on your side.”

Loki tries to temper his relief. “Then why do those imbeciles think you’re--”

“I’m on your side even when it means going against your orders.” 

Loki’s brow crinkles. “And just what does that mean?”

“It means he values your well being more than you do.” The answer comes not from Bucky, but from a deep voice behind Loki.

Loki whips around to face Thor. “You have no right to--” 

“To what? Help you?”

“Help me!” he mocks. “I help myself. That’s the only thing I care about. Myself. And I don’t need any help with it. Get that through that oafish head of yours.”

Thor looks so taken aback that, for a moment, Loki thinks he’s won. It’s a terrible moment. Then Thor opens his mouth and its replaced by an even worse moment. 

“ ‘Oafish.’ ”

Loki’s eyes flash wide, then squeeze closed. God damnit. What is it about this man that makes him into a fucking ameture all over again? Loki decides to try a tactic tried and true. 

“Ah, but of course,” he slips back into Luke’s posh British accent, “how could I expect you to be anything but a silly Oaf, my sweet--”

“Don’t,” Thor cuts him off, “do that. You don’t get to do that.”

“Why? Because it’s defiling the memory of your dear, sweet Luke?”

“No. Because you’re using it as avoidance.”

“Of what, pray tell?” He doesn’t drop the British accent. 

“You claim to be so self serving, to only care about yourself. But you’re doing yourself more harm than anyone else is.” Thor huffs several angry breaths. “Except maybe Thanos.”

“You dare say a word against my father--”

“He’s a tyrant! You’re only hurting yourself by protecting him.”

“Daddy would never hurt me. Not unless I deserved it.” 

“You don’t deserve to be choked!”

Loki’s mind catches fire. 

_ Thor knows _ . Loki is certain a worse thought has never gone through his broken mind.  _ Thor knows about Daddy and how he-- And he dares to imply-- he fucking knows-- how could he know--? _

Loki whips around to face Bucky. “You. You betrayed me.” 

Bucky shakes his head wildly, reaching out to Loki as if trying to hold onto a man about to jump. 

Loki smacks Bucky’s hand away. “Just what did they offer you? What did they give you that I haven’t? You  _ fucking _ betrayed me! And you betrayed Daddy! Why?” He pants, staring at the gaping, silent Bucky. “ _ Tell me _ !”

“We didn’t offer him anything.” 

Loki turns his glare back to Thor. “Oh? Then what? Have you threatened him? What could you possibly--”

“Loki, I know.” Bucky’s voice is absolutely wrecked. 

Loki freezes. He stares unseeing, somewhere in the direction of Thor’s sternum. Breathing harshly, he slowly turns to face Bucky. “And what,” pant, “is it,” pant, “that you think,” wheeze, “you know?”

Bucky has tears in his eyes. It’s the first time Loki’s seen him cry.

“Tell me,” he whispers, face vacant. 

Several more moments of silence go by before Bucky relents. “That day in Edinburgh.” 

Loki furrows his brow in confusion. 

“I didn’t wait downstairs.”

Loki’s mind instantly latches on exactly the day Bucky means. Then it shatters. “No, no that’s not-- you don’t know what you’re-- you imbecile, you--” Loki can’t seem to organize his thoughts. He blinks, hard. Twice. “No, don’t fucking touch me.” He slaps hands away again. 

“Loki. Loki, you need to calm down.” 

“I need to calm up.” That’ll show them. “Fuck you,  _ Jævel _ .  _ Faen ta deg _ \--” 

There are arms around him. Who--? Fuck, he can’t breath. He gasps, again and again, trying to get enough air. 

“ _ Fittetryne _ !”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Norwegian Translations: 
> 
> Jævel - devil / bastard / motherfucker 
> 
> Faen ta deg - the devil take you / fuck you
> 
> Fittetryne - cunt face / fuck face
> 
> .......basically, he's just swearing at them.


	57. Peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a new year! I think we deserve some happiness :)

Thor holds his breath as Loki pants for his. It’s painful just watching him. He writhes within the circle of Bucky’s arms, hyperventilating and screaming in Norwegian. Thor can make out several choice swear words. The beautiful voice, so natural and unhindered in his native tongue, is marred by ugly wheezing and throat-roughening shouts. 

Thor has never seen him quite like this. He’d often joked that sometimes Loki, when he was Luke, seemed a bit mad. But this is the first time that Thor has thought it truly. 

Loki’s other episodes had always been manageable, mere peculiarities rather than matters for great concern. This is different. Thor thinks this is what it looks like to watch a mind fracture. 

More than anything, it makes Thor want to hold him. Once, not too long ago, that’s exactly what he would have done. But that’s not his place now. He’s pretty sure it would do more harm than good if he were to attempt to comfort Loki at this point. So he stands back and let’s Bucky and Loki have space. But it’s agony watching Loki fall apart without being able to hold the pieces together for him. Thor physically aches with the strain of keeping himself in place. 

Loki has started scratching bloody stripes into Bucky’s chest where he’s pinned. It reminds Thor of the scratches that would be left on his own back when he had his husband crushed beneath him in a distinctly more consenting embrace. It makes him uncomfortably jealous to see those same scratches on Bucky. Considering the current situation, he wonders if that makes him sick. 

Loki elbows Bucky in the jaw, causing the shorter man to let him go and stumble backward. Loki advances on him, a wounded wolf rounding on the one who hurt it. Thor rushes forward on instinct and grabs Loki by the shoulders, pulling him back and spinning him so they’re face to face. He clasps the back of Loki’s neck, pulling him close as though he can block out the rest of the world. “Loki, Baby, stop.”

Loki fists both hands painfully in Thor’s shorn hair and hauls him the rest of the way forward, cracking their skulls together. “Why are you doing this to me?” The words sound like the plea of dying man.

Thor cups Loki’s nape with both hands, grinding their foreheads together. “Because I need to keep you safe. And you’re not safe with that man, Loki.” 

The words seem to dispel some of the fire raging in Loki. Thor clutches him tighter, hoping that it will keep them from turning to ash. They remain standing like that, hands clasping each other close and foreheads rocking together as their harsh breaths slow. 

Loki meets Thor’s eyes. “No,” he admits. “But I know where I stand with him. I know the rules. I don’t remember how to live without them. Without him. Don’t do that to me.” 

Thor strokes Loki’s cheek and brushes his hair back. “Loki, if there was ever a person that could thrive in the absence of rules, it would be you. And you won’t be alone. We’re a team, all of us. You would lose a father, yes, but you would gain an entire team of friends.” 

Loki’s eyes widen with something beautifully reminiscent of hope. 

“Loki.” Bucky’s voice breaks the spell around the two of them. 

Loki wrenches himself out of Thor’s hold. He glances frantically around. Thor looks around them too. The people who’d begun to grow concerned over Loki’s outburst seem to have moved on. En Dwi and the rest of their party aren’t even in view. 

Thor looks back to Loki. He’s calmed down, but he also seems to have shut himself off from whatever it was they just touched. Perhaps Thor shouldn’t push him any more today. Loki probably needs some time to process things. “What do you say we go for that swim?”

Loki gives him a funny look before turning to the other man in their company. He looks at Bucky like one might look at the wolf that just chewed their hand off. 

Bucky clears his throat and ducks his head away from Loki’s gaze. “I’ll, uh - I’ll head back to the others.” He walks off without another glance.

Loki doesn’t watch him go. He turns to face the ocean, his face blank but for the occasional twitch and spasm. 

Thor decides to follow through on his proposal and begins wading into the surf, hoping Loki will follow.

“What in the hell are you doing?” Loki’s voice calls from behind him. 

Thor looks over his shoulder at the scowling man. “...Swimming.”

“You’re wearing a shirt.” 

“Uh.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, take that damn thing off, you gigantic Oaf.” 

At first all Thor hears is ‘gigantic’. Then the old nickname registers. Oaf. Loki just used his old pet name. And this time, Thor’s pretty sure it was on purpose. He thinks back to Helbindi saying of Loki that the more insulting the nickname the more affectionate it is. 

He takes his shirt off. 

*******

Loki floats on his back and pretends he doesn’t exist. It’s his favorite fantasy. 

Seagulls and pelicans are circling overhead, screaming at nothing. The shrill shouts of children playing echo in their wake, sending odd shivers up his back. Everything sounds too loud, like a careening car screeching toward you with no time to dodge. 

Thor is doing laps in a circle around Loki. The motions of it are soothingly repetitive but the intentional nature of his circling serves to somewhat dispel Loki’s fantasy of non-existence. He wonders whether Thor is trying to keep Loki in one place or to keep everyone else out of the place that Loki has chosen. 

“You’re a strange man, Thor Odinson.”

Thor pauses in his laps, treading water near Loki’s head. “You’re one to talk.”

Loki snorts. He can’t argue with that.

Thor resumes his laps, circling, circling. He doesn’t pry for the reasons behind Loki’s comment.

Loki doesn’t feel the need to try and disappear as much anymore. As long as he can exist here in this quiet circle Thor has created without any expectations upon him, existing isn’t too bad. 

Loki’s mind keeps reaching out feelers toward the topic of Bucky and immediately jerking them back from the scald. He’d truly thought that Bucky understood. Although, Loki supposes, how can he expect anyone else to understand something that he himself doesn’t truly?

He is just so tired. This day, this month, this year has been so draining. Really, he can’t remember a time when he wasn’t paranoid and miserable. Even before he met Thor, before Nat left, before he joined the Order. In his life no peace has felt more genuine and real than when he pretends that he isn’t a part of life at all. 

He sighs and turns his head so that he sees Thor every time he swims past Loki’s left side. He either doesn’t notice Loki looking or chooses not to react. Loki admires the flashes he gets of the man’s face as he passes. It alights a memory of rolling down a bumpy hill with Thor, their hair whipping around their faces and getting tangled with grass. They’d laid at the bottom of the slope laughing at how terrible that idea had been, all thoughts of lies and betrayal far from Loki’s mind. Perhaps there was a time, ever so briefly, when he did feel peace. 

Loki allows himself to be hypnotized by the motions of Thor’s arms, the way he disappears out of view only to reappear just moments later, again and again. 

Then Loki’s jerking his head back up out of the water, sputtering and coughing. He blinks owlishly as Thor nearly drowns himself laughing. 

“You--” Thor cuts himself off with giggles, “you fell asleep!” 

Loki flushes carmine. “Stop laughing.”

Thor just laughs harder. Loki retaliates by splashing him with as much water as he can. 

Thor is absolutely howling now. “You’re like a wet cat! Sleepy and prissy,” Loki splashes him again, “and feisty!” 

Loki fights the upward twitch of his own lips. “I am not. And it’s not funny.” 

“It’s actually the funniest. You were all broody and serious and then--” Thor breaks off into more giggles. 

Loki’s lips twitch again. “Fuck off.” Thor keeps laughing and Loki can’t hold back his own guffaw any more, breaking down into chuckles and snorts. They keep feeding off each other until they’re both in hysterics. 

Loki’s too busy laughing to notice that his mind is completely clear of all concerns. But he does feel the whisper of that word again. 

Peace. 


	58. The Rain

The sun is setting in a fractal of orange and blue, the temperature dropping too low for swimming. Most of the people on the beach are packing up and making their way home to their normal, happy lives. 

Thor has no desire to leave, though. He wants to stay here forever. Loki is lounging on the blanket next to him, big floppy sun hat covering his eyes but leaving exposed the slight smile that tilts his lips. He’s asleep again. Thor is glad of it. He truly does seem exhausted. Thor would be content to watch over Loki’s sleep for as long as it took until he awoke rested and happy. 

But they have a meeting scheduled with Natasha one hour from now. Brunnhilde and Tony have both been sending him apologetic, but insistent looks for the past 20 minutes. It’s time to go. But he can’t leave without letting Loki know. 

He gingerly touches a pale shoulder. “Hey.” 

The sleeping man twitches and mumbles before reaching a hand up to lift the sun hat from his face. His sleepy eyes alight upon Thor and crinkle up in a painfully affectionate smile. It lasts barely a second before his features freeze and revert back into a distant mask. He sits up and scoots away from Thor with a flighty urgency. 

Thor feels once more the chafing of whiplash. It seems like every time he makes it a step closer to Loki he is immediately pushed back several more. Maybe Steve is right. Loki is just going to leave him again and again. Getting up without saying anything further, he decides to leave before it’s Loki doing the leaving once again. 

He joins Brunnhilde and Tony in gathering up their bags and saying polite goodbyes to En Dwi and the others. 

A quiet call draws his eyes back. “Hey.”

Against his better judgement, he turns to face Loki. “Yes?” he asks guardedly. 

Loki smiles tentatively. “Strange is good.” 

The simple words send a jolt through Thor, calling his memory back to what Loki said when they were swimming. _'You’re a strange man, Thor Odinson.'_ Thor offers a tiny grin in return. “And I’m rather fond of cats.” He swings his bag over his shoulder and follows Brunnhilde and Tony back to the road to catch a taxi. 

He can’t resist glancing back once more before they get too far away. Loki’s not looking back, though. His attention has turned to a woman Thor doesn’t know. Although, as he looks closer he thinks she might be familiar. 

He shrugs. She must be an acquaintance of En Dwi and Loki’s that was at the party or something. Thor turns and jogs to catch up with his friends. 

*******

As Loki watches Thor go, he feels the clash of a battle being fought within his chest. His own mind and heart are struggling to pull him in two opposite directions. If a winner isn’t declared soon, he thinks he may be torn in half. A battle field laid to waste. 

As En Dwi, Bucky, and the others in their group pack their things to leave, Loki stands back from them to avoid being drawn into conversation. He regrets that decision when he hears a hoarse voice behind him. 

“Loki.”

A shiver slithers down his spine as he turns to face the Black Order agent. She must have been sent to check in on his progress. The setting sun casts her in an eerie bluish hue. Her face gives nothing away. 

Loki thinks he’ll be sick. “Nebula.”

“What are those people doing here, Loki?”

This isn't happening. It can't be. Because if this is happening, it means Nebula knows about Thor and the others. She knows they followed Loki, found him. She knows Loki hasn't reported them. And if she knows, Daddy will know. Inevitably. 

Loki swallows past shards of glass and blinks images of Thor and the others lying dead from his eyes. This is it, when everything ends. Unless… 

Loki can think of only one way to prevent that premonition.

“They want to join the Black Order.” 

*******

Thor is grinning even as he balances three very full paper grocery bags. He’s been grinning ever since leaving the beach, all through that night, through the following day of strategy talks, through another night, through eating the last food in their hotel fridge for breakfast, and all through the subsequent grocery store run. He probably looks like a lunatic, but he really can’t be bothered to care about anything but the way Loki smiled and said, _'Strange is good,'_ the sound of his unhindered laughter, the affection with which he’d looked at Thor.

The weather is stubbornly refusing to match his mood but, in his current euphoria, even the rainy sky feels like a celebration. Every thunder crash sparks a matching joyous bellow of laughter from Thor. 

He sprints from the grocery store to the nearby bus stop which, luckily, has an awning. He sets the bags on the bench and checks the bus schedule on the battered plastic wall. The bus should arrive in just five minutes. Lucky. Thor giggles.

“You’re in quite high spirits for a man caught in the rain.” 

Thor looks around to find that another man has joined him at the bus stop. He’s somehow perfectly dry and his expensive suit looks peculiarly out of place as he sits on the rickety bench. 

Thor quirks an amused brow. “And you’re quite well dressed for someone taking the bus.” 

He turns his head from Thor to gaze out into the rain. It’s coming down so hard now that they can barely see 20 feet out. “I’m not taking the bus.”

“Just getting out of the rain, then?” Thor guesses.

The man doesn’t answer. Lightning streaks overhead, briefly illuminating their faces. Thor notices that he’s badly scarred. 

“So what are you doing out in this anyway?” He asks to fill the silence.

The man smiles in a way that has Thor mirroring it. “Visiting my son.” 


	59. Daddy Dearest

Loki hasn’t heard anything from anyone at the Order since speaking to Nebula at the beach. And she hadn’t stayed long enough to respond to Loki’s claim. 

_ They want to join the Black Order. _

Hopefully they decide to leave him to it, like they did with Bucky. Of course, Bucky hadn’t been a past mark that tracked him down. And Loki had told Thanos the moment he considered bringing Bucky on, before giving Bucky so much as a hint to his real identity. Still, Loki’s proved his loyalty time and time again. And it’s been four days with no word. Perhaps, for once in his life, things will work in his favor. 

Orange light reflects up onto Loki’s face as he broods through these thoughts. He reaches a hand out, tracing the glass case with a delicate finger. He’ll need to be making a decision quite soon.

*******

This time it’s Loki that invites them. 

Apparently a fair is going on that weekend. There will be food, rides, music, the works. En Dwi’s usual crowd is going. Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde are invited too. But instead of one of En Dwi’s employees reaching out to invite Loki’s ‘brother’ and his ‘friend-ees’, this time it's Loki calling Thor’s personal phone. The call is brief and formal, nearly impersonal, but just the fact that Loki is the one to invite them is all Thor needs to be ecstatic to attend. 

Tony, Brunnhilde, and he arrive at the fair just as the sun passes its midday zenith. Loki had said to meet them at the ‘children’s gambling booths’, which Thor took to mean the carnival games. 

They buy candied almonds and mill about the game area, keeping an eye out for Loki or any Sakaar people. Tony spots a shooting competition and just has to play it. Thor and Brunnhilde stand back and watch, hoping he doesn’t lose all their remaining money. But Gamora is covering most of their expenses, so they mostly just watch fondly as Tony joyously plays and loses several games in a row. 

“Huh,” Brunnhilde says.

When she doesn’t elaborate, Thor looks over at her. “What?”

“Nothing. I just thought I saw someone I recognized.” 

“Who?”

“I’m not sure. But she seemed familiar.” Brunnhilde shrugs and returns to watching Tony get his ass whooped in ring toss by a child. 

Thor looks around, vaguely recalling seeing someone familiar himself recently. He shakes off the odd feeling and turns his focus back to scanning the area for Loki. The time at which they were meant to meet Loki’s group passed over 30 minutes ago. Thor tries to keep himself from wondering whether Loki would have purposely stood them up. He sighs and goes back to watching Tony play his games. 

“There you are.” 

Thor and Brunnhilde both spin at the voice. Thor is already grinning. “Loki!”

Brunnhilde looks past him. “Where’s your sucker?”

Loki huffs an exasperated breath. “That imbecile found the jello wrestling competition and refused to miss a single moment of it.” 

Thor and Brunnhilde share a glance that communicates neither of them want to know what jello wrestling is. 

Loki shakes his head. “I finally gave up and left him there.”

Thor’s heart swells. Loki chose to leave his mark to come find them. Whether he was worried about making them wait or just preferred their company over En Dwi’s, it makes no difference. What matters is that Loki sought them out all on his own with no apparent ulterior motive. 

Loki blinks. “Where’s Tony?

“Yeeeeeeaaaaaah! Take that!” 

“Ah. I should have guessed.”

Tony has apparently finally beaten a child at one of the games. It’s mini basketball. The basket is about two feet shorter than Tony. 

“I see you’ve finally found someone less athletic than yourself.”

Tony looks around curiously and grins at seeing who it is, throwing his arms in the air. “Loki! Just in time to see my victory.”

“Yeah, and you missed about 20 losses,” Brunhilde smirks. 

“Hey,” Tony pouts. 

Thor’s heart warms as he looks on. Watching them all like this he could almost believe there was no bad blood spilled between them. 

“How about we get Tony away from the gambling booths while he’s ahead?” Thor suggests. “I don’t know about you guys, but I’m pretty hungry.” 

*******

Loki can’t remember the last time he had so much fun. 

Earlier that day he’d been drowning beneath dread and confusion. Eventually, he decided that dwelling on it would get him nowhere. Either Daddy will come to kill them all or he’ll stand back and trust Loki to handle this. 

So Loki has made the choice to enjoy this day as much as he can. If there is a chance that they’ll all be dead before long, then he wants to have at least one day of peace with them. Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde all deserve that. And Loki may not deserve it, but he’s going to be selfish and take it anyway. 

They eat five different kinds of fried foods, go on three rides, and each buy a different animal backpack. Brunnhilde gets a pegasus, Tony a bird, Thor a frog, and Loki a coiled snake. They tease and joke with each other, no hint of animosity in their words. It feels almost like when Loki would spend time with Thor’s friends back at Asgard. Except that now Tony, Brunnhilde, and Thor all know who Loki is. They know and they’re treating him like this anyway. Like a friend. 

As twilight falls, the fair begins to light up in ways that make Loki feel like they’ve left reality behind. They’re in a wonderland of color and nothing at all hurts, except Loki’s face from smiling too much. 

As they enter a branch of the fair they’ve yet to explore, more prospects show up. Brunnhilde gets in line for the strength competition. Tony gets in line for nachos. Both lines are excessively long. 

Loki looks around for something to occupy he and Thor while they wait. An odd silence fell between the two of them as soon as the others walked off and he wants it to end. This isn’t a day for uncomfortable silences. 

It doesn’t take him long to find the perfect activity. 

*******

Loki tugs on Thor’s sleeve, pulling him in the direction of the ferris wheel. Thor grins and follows willingly. The line is much shorter than the others and they’re climbing into a capsule less than a minute later. 

They don’t talk, but as the ride starts up Thor feels Loki shift close enough that their shoulders press together. Thor doesn’t even second guess sliding his leg over to rest alongside Loki’s. He can see Loki’s matching smile in his peripheral and if this wasn’t already the happiest Thor’s ever been then it is now. 

The sky is darkening quickly, the lights down below growing brighter. Thor admires the maze of glowing booths beneath their feet. It’s almost as if they’re in a completely different world up here. And there’s no one Thor would rather be in that place with. He looks over at the person beside him. 

Loki’s already looking back. “This reminds me of when we went to that amusement park with your friends.” 

Thor laughs at the memory. “The main thing I remember about that day is Fandral getting drunk and proposing to you. He even had a candy ring!”

Loki chuckles. “Did I ever tell you he actually bowed when we first met?”

“Fuck, he didn’t. He did? Oh Christ.” Thor shakes his head. “When you and I started dating he warned me that if I ever dumped you he was going to snatch you up before I could realize how big of an idiot I was.”

Loki grins. “And Sif told me that if I ever hurt you she would skin me alive.” Loki abruptly sobers, his words apparently catching up to his ears. 

Thor doesn’t like the change in atmosphere. “Hey,” he says. Loki looks over at him again. “This is fun.” 

Loki’s smile is slow, but there. “It is, isn’t it?”

On instinct, Thor reaches a hand out and grasps the back of Loki’s neck. Loki jumps and Thor panics, removing it. “I’m sorry, I--”

Loki puts his hand on Thor’s wrist, keeping him in place. “It’s okay.” 

Thor’s heart beats wildly in his chest. He curls his fingers into the raven hair, watching how Loki’s face softens. It gives Thor hope that the trust between them is not gone entirely.  Then Loki’s hair shifts and something cold brushes Thor’s fingers. Something familiar. He instinctively grasps it and looks to the small braid on the underside of the black locks. 

The gold Inguz rune hangs there. 

Thor’s breathing stops. For a moment all he can do is stare. Eventually, he manages to tear his eyes back up to Loki’s, needing to know what he will find there.

Loki is still smiling. 

Thor almost doesn’t notice when their capsule reaches the ground. He’s not ready for the ride to be over. But the conductor is shooing them off, so they climb down and begin the walk back toward where they left Tony and Brunnhilde. 

Thor’s mind is a thicket of thoughts. He can’t seem to decide which way to turn. Should he say something about the Inguz charm? Somehow, it seems like it would ruin this world outside of reality they’ve found tonight. And the last thing he wants is to see that look of peace leave Loki’s face. 

He’s so wrapped up in his own thoughts, Thor only then realizes Loki isn’t beside him anymore. He’d been so concerned with his thoughts about Loki that he’d forgotten to attend to the very real Loki beside him. The odd paranoia from earlier surfaces and he whips back around. 

Loki is standing just three steps behind him, the ferris wheel haloing him in light. He’s gazing at Thor with a quiet fire in his eyes. Thor thinks back to when Frigga first saw he and Loki together. She’d said that Thor looked at Loki as though he were the sun itself. Thor had looked at his love and seen that same expression on Loki’s face. 

That’s the way he’s looking at Thor now. 

He takes a step toward Loki, all doubts drowned out by this unreality they’ve been floating in. He’s never felt more certain about what he wants. “Loki, I--”

“You certainly seem to be having fun.”

A chill goes down Thor’s spine as he watches all the color seep from Loki’s face. He’s already mourning the look of peace as it flees. 

Thor looks up to where a man has stepped up close behind Loki, towering over the both of them. He is large, even larger than Laufey, and the purple suit he wears stands out oddly amidst the sea of denim clad families. The man shifts and the light of the ferris wheel illuminates the scars on his face. Thor suddenly recognizes him as the man from the bus stop. 

“You.” 

The man ignores him. “That is good. You deserve to have fun, my child.” 

As the words register, the meeting at the bus stop warps into something entirely different in Thor’s mind.  _ ‘Visiting my son,’ _ he’d said. This must be Loki’s adoptive father. 

Thanos. 

Thor’s eyes widen and snap down to Loki. His love is pale as death and visibly shaking, eyes glassy and staring unseeing through Thor where mere moments ago they’d been so full of affection. 

Thanos’s large hand comes up to wrap loosely, possessively around Loki’s clavicle. Loki’s head tilts back as though reflexively trying to escape the thick digits. Thor’s mind flashes back to Loki gasping for breath at the grip of an imaginary hand. 

Thanos leans down so that he’s speaking right next to Loki’s ear. “I hear you’ve found new recruits. Again.” 

Loki flinches, a single tear escaping his lashes. Thor’s eyes track it down his cheek. 

“It would seem you’re attracting new members like vermin to filth.” Thanos takes a deep whiff of Loki’s hair, his wide nostrils expanding and contracting exaggeratedly. “I do hope that’s not indicative of your grooming habits.” 

Thor looks from Loki’s trembling face to Thanos’s condescending smirk. Something sparks inside him and it feels like lightning running through his veins. Every inch of him burns with the desire to cleave this man’s hand from his body so as to keep it from ever touching Loki again. 

Then Thanos is looking at Thor. “So is he truthful, then? You seek to join my Order?”

Thor’s mind catches up slowly. He’s been far too focused on Loki’s distress to bother registering what Thanos has been implying. Thanos thinks that Thor wants to join the Black Order? Why would he think that? Thor looks to Loki speculatively. 

Loki’s eyes sear into Thor, pleading with him. 

Thor comes to a realization. Loki must have told Thanos that Thor and the others want to join the Black Order. But why would he do that? 

Thanos growls and it’s a threat. 

Of course. Loki told Thanos this lie about Thor and the others in order to protect them. If Thanos knows that they tracked Loki here and that he didn’t report it, they’re all dead. Thor looks back to Thanos. It takes every ounce of willpower he has to suppress his rage at the tyrant and mold his expression into one of hopeful determination. 

“Yes. I want to join the Black Order.” 


	60. Give Daddy a Hug

“Yes. I want to join the Black Order.”

Thanos’s narrow gaze on Thor makes him feel like a frog in the shadow of a hawk. 

“So do I.”

Thor looks behind him to find Brunnhilde by his left shoulder. 

“And me,” Tony says from Thor’s other side.

They must have come looking for Thor and Loki and overheard. Thor is more grateful for their presence at his back than he could ever hope to communicate. He settles for squaring his shoulders and looking Thanos dead in the eye. “We all want to join the Black Order.” 

Thanos chuckles, his hand relaxing away from Loki’s clavicle, moving to rest on his shoulder. Thor releases a relieved breath as Loki sucks in his first full breath in minutes. 

“You’ve found yourself quite the pets here, Little One.” He leers at Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde. “Or, should I say, they found you?”

Loki’s throat bobs as he swallows. When he speaks, his voice has a tone to it that Thor’s never heard before. “They did. Quite impressive, really. We could utilize those skills.” 

Thanos pets Loki’s hair. It makes Thor’s skin crawl. Remarkably, the gesture seems to actually relax Loki. His shoulders fall slightly and his face evens out into an expression that makes him look years younger. 

“You are right, Son. That sounds like exactly the kind of skill set suited to our Order.” Loki looks up at Thanos, eyes wide and hopeful. Thanos smiles down at him before looking at Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde. “That is, if their ambition is truly about the Order.” 

Thor’s lungs constrict in terror at the warning in those words. Have they been figured out?

“I will tell you now,” Thanos says in a way that Thor thinks is meant to sound magnanimous, “that if your intention is just to get close to Loki, you should put a gun to yourselves now. None of you will have him again. I will not have you touching my merchandise now that you are no longer the client.”

Thor thinks he might puke. 

Loki scoffs, seeming much more confident and in control now. “Trust me, none of them are here for me. I already tested them to be sure.” 

Thanos hums approvingly. “In that case, I will permit a trial period. You three will assist Loki in his current mission. Should you prove useful and true to your word, then you may join.” It does not go unnoticed that he does not say what will happen to them if they are not deemed useful. 

“Now, my child. We have not seen each other for months. Give Daddy a hug.” 

Loki turns and throws his arms around Thanos’s middle as the taller man brings one hand up to cup Loki’s head closer to his broad chest. Thanos stares at Thor as he holds Loki and it feels like a challenge. 

*******

Loki hugs his father with all the joy of relief he feels. He had been sure that Thanos would see through the ruse and kill them all before Loki had so much as a chance to appeal to him. Loki should not have doubted him. Daddy trusts Loki, he’s always said so. A better son would never have doubted it. 

Thanos pats Loki’s head in the way he would when Loki was a child and he’d done a good job. “Now, my son, it is time for you to return to your mark. You’ve left him unmonitored for far too long.” There’s a warning in the words and Loki knows well to heed it. He swallows down his panic, reminding himself again and again that Daddy trusts him. He’s not here to kill them. Thor is safe.

“Yes, Daddy.” He pulls back from Thanos and, with one last look at the man who raised him, turns and walks away. 

“Come, you three,” Loki calls. “It’s time to see how useful you can be to me.” After a moment, he hears footsteps trailing behind him. He releases the breath he’d been holding. In truth, he’s surprised they went along with this ruse so easily. Apparently they have more survival instinct than Loki gave them credit for. However, they’re sure to have their own questions about why Loki lied to Thanos in order to protect them. Loki takes a fortifying breath. He’s not looking forward to answering those questions. 

He’s surprised when, after five minutes of walking, he’s still heard none. After ten minutes he’s still yet to be asked a single question. And then they’re at the After Dark Burlesque Show, where Loki knows En Dwi will be. It had been the main reason he’d wanted to come to the fair in the first place. 

“Loki,” Thor calls just as they make it to the door.

Loki stops but doesn’t turn around. “Yes?”

There’s a pause before Thor continues. “How should we act in order to be deemed useful?”

Loki looks back at Thor in surprise. The larger man’s face is grim but open, trusting. Loki doesn’t know what to make of it. 

“Just follow my lead.” Loki steps forward and opens the door. 

Finding En Dwi isn’t difficult. He, Topaz, Bucky, and Korg are at the very front of the performance hall. En Dwi is standing on top of their table doing his own rendition of a very gangly burlesque performance. Everyone sitting behind them is yelling at him to get down and stop blocking the girls on stage. 

Loki rolls his eyes and murmurs to the other three, “Okay, first assignment. Tony, go to the bar and bring non-alcoholic beers for En Dwi and myself. Brunnhilde, En Dwi likes you. See if you can get him off the damn table. Thor, I need you to distract Topaz and and anyone else who gets in the way so that I can get Bucky away from the others. I need to talk to him.” 

There’s an awkward silence as they all gape at the quickly spoken orders. “Well? Get to it!” 

All three hurry to obey, Tony running off in the direction of the bar, Brunnhilde and Thor walking briskly toward En Dwi’s table. Loki suppresses a grin. He could get used to this. 

He takes his time getting to the table himself. He wants to give Thor some time to distract everyone enough so that Loki can get Bucky away from the others. It doesn’t take long.

“Topaz!” Thor hollars faux-drunkenly. “My best friend, how are you?”

“Darron,” she greets flatly. 

Thor belows a laugh. “For you, I’ll be whoever you want.” 

Loki lifts an eyebrow, chuckling. Thor’s acting hasn’t improved much. But it seems to be doing the job. 

Meanwhile, Brunnhilde is wrangling En Dwi down from on top of the table. Her approach is a little more physical and, well, forceful than Loki had intended. But that too seems to be working just fine. 

Loki weaves around the table, going unnoticed amidst the commotion, and finds his way behind Bucky’s chair. He snakes a hand around the man’s wrist and leans close behind him. “Come.” He lets go and walks off toward the side exit. Bucky, the smart boy, follows. 

They come to a stop just outside, under a canopy of palm trees. It’s completely dark outside now and the fair lights barely touch them here. It gives Loki confidence.

“Daddy says hi.” 

He can’t quite make out Bucky’s expression in the dark, but his posture visibly stiffens. 

Loki smirks. “Don’t worry, I didn’t tell him about your little mutiny.” 

There’s a pause before Bucky responds. “But you won’t join us.” It’s not a question. Smart boy. 

Loki’s mind has been working at warp speed since speaking with Daddy, trying to figure out how to move forward from here. And he thinks he’s found an idea that appeals. “No. You all are going to join me.” 

“But,” Loki can hear the frown in Bucky’s voice, “I’m already part of the Order.”

“And soon enough you will realize the mistake it was to ever become a traitor. Because now Daddy is under the impression that those three are petitioning to join the Order. And he will be watching.” 

Loki grins, feeling half mad. “You all have no choice but to do as I say. If you want to live, that is.”


	61. Be Our Guest

“What exactly did he say?” 

Natasha has been forcing them to relay the run-in with Thanos down to the last detail. 

Thor runs a hand down his face. “He said that he’ll give us a - a trial period.” 

“But why would Loki tell Thanos that we want to join them?” Brunnhilde ponders aloud. 

“He’s protecting us,” Thor says quietly. 

“Maybe this means Loki is on our side now,” Tony offers hopefully. 

“He’s not.” All eyes turn to Bucky. 

“What makes you say that?” Gamora asks suspiciously. 

Bucky’s brow wrinkles in an odd expression. He doesn’t respond. 

Tony blows out a noisy breath. “That’s it, Nick Brody. You gotta commit. Which side are you on here?”

Steve straightens in his chair. “He’s on our side. Back off.”

“I don’t trust him,” Gamora growls. 

“Guys, give him a break,” Bruce defends. “He’s in a tough spot.” 

“Hey, yeah, so am I,” Korg interjects. “Mr. Loki is my good friend too. Even more so than Bucky, I would say.”

“Enough,” Natasha speaks evenly. “At this point, it makes no difference what Loki’s intention is. You have no choice but to make every effort to appear as though you are truly trying to join the Order. Thanos will be watching, and likely other people from the Order as well. You cannot afford to lose this cover. Whatever Loki’s plan, he’s given you the one cover that may save your lives. Do not throw that away.” 

*******

Korg is the one to invite them this time. Apparently Loki’s decided that he makes a convenient messenger. 

En Dwi is asking Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde to the penthouse for dinner. Two days have passed since the fair. Honestly, Thor is glad to have had the time to process the encounter with Thanos. But now it’s time to get back in the game. 

When the limo pulls up out front of their hotel, it isn’t Gamora driving. It’s another woman. The minute Thor sees her, he recognizes her as the woman that Loki was speaking to at the beach. She’d seemed familiar then too. 

“Hey.” Tony snaps his fingers. “I know you. You were my receptionist. Why-- Oh, fuck me.”

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde seem to come to the conclusion at the same time. This woman is another Black Order agent. That’s why they all know her. 

“Where’s Gamora?” Brunnhilde asks. 

The woman stares at them for several moments without responding. “Are you going to get in?”

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde exchange worried glances. It seems like they won’t be getting any answers out of this woman, though, so they slide into the limo and ride to the penthouse in silence. 

When they arrive, Korg is waiting outside for them. 

“Hey guys, Mr. Gast asked me to escort you up.” 

They all greet him distractedly, still concerned over Gamora’s absence. 

Korg turns and begins walking them inside, looking back over his shoulder to talk. “Thor, you never mentioned your father was coming for a visit. It sure is nice that he wants to reconnect with your brother. Mr. Loki - I mean Lucky - sure does seem happy to see him.” 

“Wait. Korg,” Thor turns the tall man around with a hand on his arm. “What do you mean my father is here?”

“You and Loki’s dad, he’s here for dinner. You didn’t know that?”

“Korg, no. Thor and Loki aren’t related,” Tony shivers. “They were married.”

Korg gasps dramatically. “You married your own brother?”

“No, he--”

“Guys. That’s hardly the issue right now,” Thor interrupts. “Korg, the man that’s here for dinner. What does he look like?”

“Uh, kinda handsome but, like, also really ugly.” 

“Thanos.” All three of them say it in unison. 

“No, he said his name was Larry.”

*******

Loki is pouting. Daddy has never involved himself in one of Loki’s assignments to this extent before. It feels like he doesn’t think Loki is up to the job this time. 

He’d shown up posing as Larry Kirkwood, wealthy businessman and father to Loki and Donald. Their story is that Donald called their father after reconnecting with Lucky and begged him to come to Miami to do the same. En Dwi had fallen for it like a retired housewife to a melodramatic soap opera. 

And now they’re milling about the penthouse, En Dwi and Thanos jabbering on about the beauty of the American dollar or some shit, as they wait for the others to show up. Finally, the elevator dings and Korg steps out with the menaces three in tow. They don’t seem surprised to see Thanos. Korg must have tipped them off. 

“Lucky,” Thor greets. He turns to Thanos and gives a nod that would be considered formal if it weren’t so stiff. As is, it can only be described as constipated. “Father.”

“My son,” Thanos smiles. “Thank you for convincing me to do this. It is good to have both of my sons together in the same room with me.” Thor visibly fights a frown. 

En Dwi absolutely melts at the touching display. “What - what a lovely reunion. So touching. Really, just lovely.”

Loki can’t help being annoyed at how quickly Thanos has endeared En Dwi to him. That’s meant to be Loki’s job. He doesn’t need any help. Stitching a smile onto his face, Loki leans into En Dwi’s personal space. “En, I’m hungry. Perhaps we should eat.” 

“Yes, marvelous idea, my Pet.” En Dwi hooks an arm around Loki’s waist and marches off in the direction of the dining room. “This way, everyone!”

Loki can’t help a smug look at Thanos as they pass. _Watch how it’s done, Daddy_. 

They enter into the lavish dining room and sit around the long table. En Dwi insists on having Thanos, Thor, and Loki all sit close to him. The others fill in the other end of the table. Bucky and Korg take up posts standing on the outer edge of the room, a far more formal position for the bodyguards than usual. 

“Now, I want to hear all about what Lucky was like as a little baby boy. Well, more - more of a baby than he is now.” En Dwi laughs at his own wit. Only Loki and Thanos join in. 

“He was a spirited little one. Always knew what he wanted.” Thanos looks at Thor. “Isn’t that right, Donald?”

Thor grins stiffly. “Yes, quite spirited.” 

Daddy’s gaze lingers on Thor just a half second too long in a way Loki knows well. Thanos is not satisfied with Thor’s performance. 

“Come, Donald,” Loki prompts. “Tell the story about that time when I pranked you.” He smiles encouragingly. 

Thor looks at Loki with a mildly panicked look. “Oh r-right. The prank.”

“Yes, Donald,” Thanos grins chillingly. “Regale us with that tale.”

Thor shifts. “Well, you see, when he were children Lucky left a, uh, a rubber snake on my bed. And he knows I love snakes. So I picked it up to admire it and he jumped out of the bed covers. And he, uh, uh, stabbed me.” There’s a shocked silence for several seconds before Thor hurries to add, “with a pencil. He stabbed me with a pencil. No permanent damage. All good fun, really.”

Loki peeks at Thanos. He doesn’t seem impressed. 

En Dwi, on the other hand, howls with laughter. “My dear Lucky boy. You were quite the - the fox as a child, weren’t you, hmm? Or should I say snake? Oh, it’s no wonder your brother here holds such a, uh, fondness for you.” 

Loki cringes. Hopefully Daddy doesn’t catch on to the innuendo there. 

En Dwi’s hand scratches at the air lecherously. “But really, that cute butt could have achieved that all on its own.”

Loki groans internally. This is going to be a long night.

*******

Dinner is a long, arduous affair full of Thor trying to keep up with Loki and Thanos. Tony and Brunnhilde provide what assistance they can, but it’s a losing battle. Lying just isn’t Thor’s strong suit. And yet, he has the distinct feeling that Loki is doing his very best to make Thor look good. 

“Donald was always the more popular of the two of us. But he always stood up for me when his teammates picked on me. Isn’t that right, Donald?” 

“Ah, yes. Lucky has always been the most important person to me, so how could I not?”

Loki actually grimaces at that. Thor doesn’t get why. He’d thought that was one of his better deliveries, especially seeing as it’s basically the truth.

“Really, Donald?” Thanos inquires. “Even more so than your girlfriend sitting next to you?”

Oops. Thor had actually forgotten that Brunnhilde is meant to be his girlfriend. Thor opens and closes his mouth a couple times before looking to his friends for help. 

“Oh, I understand,” Brunnhilde cuts in, saving the day as always. “A sibling is someone you know your entire life. I mean, I’d say my sister is the most important person in my life. Donald and I don’t hold each other to unreasonable standards.” 

Thor squeezes Brunnhilde’s knee in thanks. He gets a sharp kick to the shin in response. He leans back in his chair, hoping to avoid speaking as much as possible until this hell forsaken dinner is over. 


	62. Surprise

“Thank you all so much for coming. It’s been, ah, fascinating.” En Dwi grins lazily. 

“Mr. Gast,” Thanos interjects, “if you wouldn’t mind, I would like to borrow my youngest for a little longer this evening. He and I have spent so long apart, I would like some time to reconnect with him one on one.” 

En Dwi lights up. “Oh, of course. So touching. Really, just lovely. You run along and have fun with your father, Pet.” 

Loki leans in to peck a kiss on En Dwi’s cheek “I’ll see you in a couple hours.” 

Loki follows Thanos and the menaces three onto the elevator, waving goodbye to En Dwi one last time before the doors close. As soon as they begin descending, Loki releases a sigh of relief. Finally, that awful dinner is over. Which brings them to a new order of business. “Daddy, we didn’t have a meeting scheduled for tonight. What’s this about?”

“I have a surprise for you, child.”

Loki grins. “Really?”

Thanos looks over Loki’s head at the other three in the elevator. “Yes. And your new recruits are invited.”

Loki feels a burst of excitement at those words. If Thanos is inviting Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde along to a meeting, then he must not have been as disappointed with their performances as Loki had thought. He bites his lip and waits anxiously. 

When they exit the building, Nebula is waiting with the limo outside. They all climb in and drive in silence. Loki doesn’t ask where they’re going. He knows well enough to stay quiet until Daddy is ready to give him more information. 

Less than five minutes later they pull up outside of a modern three story building, all metal and glass cut at sharp angles. Thanos gets out first and stands looking at the building as the others follow suit. Once Nebula has driven away, Thanos turns back to look at them. 

“Welcome to the new temporary Black Order base of operations. Since it looks like I’ll be in Miami for a while, I decided we’d best set up a base here for the duration of our stay.”

Loki beams. Daddy really must have a good impression of Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde in order to bring them to this place. Never would he allow outsiders to come here. Loki looks over at the menaces three to see their reactions. Tony looks a little bug eyed, but certainly impressed. Brunnhilde looks skeptical, but that’s to be expected. Thor, though, he’s looking right back at Loki instead of at the building in front of them. When he sees Loki’s smile, he smiles back. It makes Loki tingle. 

“Daddy, I want to see inside.”

Thanos chuckles fondly. “Of course, Loki. Come along. I will show you all around.” 

Loki follows eagerly, the menaces three in his wake. He smiles. It seems like they really are trying to please Thanos. And they seem quite impressed by the temporary base. Perhaps this plan will go more smoothly than he’d expected. By the end of this job, Thor, Tony, and Brunnhile will join the Black Order.

*******

Thor can’t figure out what they’re doing here. There’s no way Thanos trusts them enough to take them to such a place. And yet, they seem to be getting the full tour. 

Thanos leads them through the building with all the gravitas of a proud homeowner. It feels terribly casual as he shows them the ‘hacking room’, which is full of computers, wires, and all manner of gadgets that Thor wouldn’t begin to be able to identify. Tony, though, seems very excited by them. 

They pass through meeting rooms large enough for 100 people, observation rooms full of monitors, and an entire wing dedicated to offices. Three of the offices have people sitting in them. The first two are introduced to them as Proxima and Ebony. Thor wonders if those are their real names or the nicknames that Gamora spoke of. Both agents are polite, but rather affectless. It gives Thor the creeps. 

The third Thor recognizes the minute they enter his office. It’s one of the men that came to his and Loki’s wedding, supposedly one of Luke’s childhood friends. Thor looks sharply at Loki and finds him scowling at the man.

“Ronan. Your most recent folder left out some… relevant information.”

“Then it’s a good thing you’re so adaptable, Loki.” Ronan looks over at Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde. “I’m sure they could attest that your performance was never harmed by a few undisclosed… toy preferences.”

Thor decides he doesn’t like this man. Especially when, as they’re leaving his office, Ronan calls after them, “Really, I thought tentacles would be right up your alley.”

Thanos leads them through the rest of the wing. Eventually, at the very end they reach a large office with glass walls and a large stainless steel desk. 

“This is my office,” Thanos gestures to the large space. “Whenever I call for you to meet me here, you will do so promptly.”

“Yes, Sir,” Loki intones formally. He casts a glance at the other three. When they don’t respond, he raises an eyebrow. 

“Oh! Yes, Sir,” Thor follows suit. Tony and Brunnhilde chorus after him. 

Thanos smiles and it makes Thor’s skin crawl. “Good.”

*******

Two days later, En Dwi sends an invitation for Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde to come to his home ‘for a night of relaxation.’ They get a ride from the woman that they now know to be Nebula. According to Thanos, she has replaced Gamora on this job so that Gamora could go on an information scouting mission in another state. Thor and the others still find it odd that Gamora didn’t contact them to tell them she was leaving, but they hopes that she just didn’t deem it worth the risk of Thanos seeing their communications.

When Nebula drops them at the door, it is not Korg waiting for them outside, but Bucky. “Hey.” It’s the most friendly greeting he’s ever given them. 

“Hey, man,” Tony grins. “Any idea what En Dwi is wanting us here for tonight?”

Bucky just sighs. “You’ll see.” He turns and walks inside. 

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde exchange unsure looks before following. 

When they exit the elevator onto the top floor of the building, they’re greeted by En Dwi rubbing his hands together eagerly. “Ah, good. You’re here.” 

Loki looks up from where he’s lounging on a chaise. “What are they doing here?”

En Dwi shakes a flippant hand in Loki’s direction. “Nevermind that.” 

The elevator dings again and Thanos steps out. 

“Oh, goody,” En Dwi exclaims. “You’re all here.” 

Loki sets his book down and gets up. “En? I didn’t know we had plans tonight.”

“I made plans on both our behalves,” En Dwi says dismissively. “Now, how about we retire to the - the lounge floor? Yes, that is a good idea. Follow me.” En Dwi gets up and walks off without waiting for anyone. He seems quite excited about this. 

Thor looks at Loki questioningly. “There’s an entire floor that’s just a lounge?”

Loki smirks. “You’d be amazed at the things that get whole floors dedicated to them in this building.” He turns and walks after En Dwi. The rest of them file out after him. They all squeeze into the elevator and ride down seven floors. When the doors open, they exit into an expansive space filled with cushions, couches, game tables, and a full bar. It is indeed a lounge floor. 

En Dwi doesn’t advance any further into the room than ten steps. They all come to a stop behind him. Loki cocks an eyebrow. “En, what are we--”

“SURPRISE!” over a hundred voices yell as people pop up from behind furniture. 

Loki jumps a mile high and dodges behind Thor, who startles rather violently at the explosive sound himself. “What--?”

“Surprise!” En Dwi reemphasizes, helpfully. 

Loki steps out from behind Thor, visibly attempting to compose himself. He looks around at the room full of people. “En, what’s the occasion?”

En Dwi walks up to Loki and goes down on a knee. 

Thor’s stomach drops. 

“Lucky, pet of my life.” 

Thor scowls. 

“Will you marry me?”


	63. A Decision

The party is in full swing as they celebrate the engagement. Loki is hanging off of En Dwi, affecting the role of lovestruck fiance. Thanos, Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde, along with a few other party guests from the surprise brigade, stand circled around them as En Dwi recants the story of how he decided to propose.

“The surprise party was originally just to celebrate the, ah, reunion of father and sons, this joyous occasion. But, uh - well, Donald wove that beautiful tale of lovely Lucky’s childhood playfulness and it made me think.” He looks around at the assembled people. “I’d sure make a fan-tiddy-tastic father, wouldn’t I?” Everyone hurries to nod. “And Lucky would be the cutest little house wifey.” He looks at Thor. “So, Donald. We have you to thank for our - our engagement.”

Loki grins. He’s been trying to find a way to make Thor look good to Thanos without much luck. But it appears he needn’t have worried. Thanos couldn’t possibly deny Thor’s usefulness now, seeing as he planted the idea of proposing in En Dwi’s mind. Regardless of the fact that it was unintentional. Irrelevant detail. 

Thor walks off on his own a little later in the night. Loki peels himself away from En Dwi to follow after him. He trails Thor down a hallway that, little does Thor know, leads to the orgy room. 

“If you’re looking for the bathroom, you’re headed in entirely the wrong direction.” Loki props himself against the hall wall and smirks as Thor jerks around to see who’s followed him.

Thor blows out a breath. “Loki.”

“Expecting someone else?

Thor rubs his neck. “To be honest, your father has me a little on edge.” 

Loki chuckles. “You get used to it. Or, well, I suppose not. But you learn to hide it better.” 

Thor just frowns. Loki isn’t sure what’s got him upset. “If you’re nervous that you won’t impress him, you shouldn’t be worried. That little stunt in there, prompting En Dwi to propose? That alone has secured you a place in the Order.” Loki smiles fondly as he pushes from the wall and approaches the other man, stopping only when he can see the veins in Thor’s eyes. “You’re unassuming. People assume that a pretty guy like you isn’t smart, but you are. Once Daddy sees that, he’ll understand how valuable you are. Unassuming is good in our line of work.” 

Thor’s frown has only gotten deeper. “Wait, you - do you really think I would join the Black Order?”

“Well - yes.” Loki searches Thor’s eyes. “Don’t you see? It solves everything.” 

“No, Loki.”

Loki steps back abruptly. He feels like he’s been slapped. 

Thor hurries to step forward, bringing them close once more. “Loki, it’s not that I don’t want to join you. It’s that I don’t want to join Thanos.” He reaches a hand out, but Loki steps back once more. 

“But now that you’ve met him, surely you can see Daddy is no monster.”

“What I saw was how scared you were of him. Loki, I would do anything to get you away from him. I lo-- I care about you.”

Loki shakes his head, ignoring Thor’s slip of the tongue. This isn’t how this was meant to go. Thor was supposed to join him. Then they could be together without being hunted down and killed. But apparently Thor cares more about his stupid revenge than he does about being with Loki. “No. If you really cared about me, you wouldn’t be hell bent on this  _ stupid _ scheme. You want to destroy my life. That’s all you’re after.” Loki continues to back away, shaking his head. “I was a fool to think I could trust you. To believe you cared about me. You’re the enemy.” 

“Loki, no--”

The words are lost as Loki turns and runs. 

*******

Loki runs. Again. Thor attempts to refrain from ripping out what little is left of his shorn hair. He thinks he’ll be driven mad soon. 

Knowing it would be useless to follow Loki, Thor turns in the opposite direction and continues down the hall in search of the bathroom. Instead, he finds a room filled with several California king beds. He decides he doesn’t want to know what they’re for and backs away slowly, continuing his search for the bathroom. After he finally finds the correct hallway and uses the toilet, he takes his time getting back to the party. 

Thor spends the rest of the night sitting with Tony and Brunnhilde as they drink themselves into a puddle. Watching Loki get engaged brings back painful memories for all of them.

Two hours later, the party is declared over as En Dwi and Loki dance into the elevator to ‘begin the real festivities.’ Thor downs the rest of his drink and stands. “Let’s get out of here.”

“Allow me to drive you.”

They all look up to find Thanos smiling charismatically at them. 

The alcohol slows Thor’s mind enough that he can’t recall why he was meant to make this man like him. “No, we’re fine.”

“Oh, but I insist. Besides, we’re staying at the same hotel. It only makes sense to drive back together.” 

That gets Thor’s brain to wake up. The same hotel? They could end up running into Thanos at the continental breakfast? 

“We’d be glad to ride with you,” Brunnhilde cuts in. 

“Good. Follow me.” Thanos turns and walks back toward the elevator. The three of them follow and together they ride down to the ground level in silence. The same woman who picked them up in the limo earlier is waiting outside in a sleek black sports car by the curb. 

When she sees them, she climbs out and presents the keys to Thanos. He takes them without a word and gets into the driver’s seat. Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde all look at each other then scramble for the backseat. Tony loses and ends up in shotgun. 

They ride for a few minutes in silence before Thanos speaks. “That was quite impressive, getting Gast to propose tonight.”

Thor glances at Brunnhilde, mildly panicked. She doesn’t prove helpful. “Uh, yeah,” He stutters. “My pleasure.” He sees Tony wince at the weak response. 

“Loki certainly seems to think you three have potential. For your sakes, I do hope he is right.” 

The rest of the drive lapses in silence. When they at last pull up at the hotel, Tony, Thor, and Brunnhilde clamber out, offering only the weakest of parting words. Thanos’s car loiters a while before driving into the underground parking garage. 

So he really is staying at the same hotel. Thor shivers. 

*******

Loki has managed to avoid Thor for the past 24 hours. He’d spent the rest of the party glued to En Dwi’s side and the following day ‘celebrating’ the engagement with his new fiance. Finally, as the sun is beginning to set, En Dwi has fallen asleep. 

Loki showers, dresses, and takes the elevator down to the tenth floor. He walks to the first door, pulls a strip of silicone from his pocket, and presses it to the fingerprint pad. The door opens with a soft swoosh and closes just as quietly behind him. 

As he walks, he thinks about Thor. Why is the man so insistent that Daddy and the Black Order are so awful? Sure, they stole all his money and ruined his life, but still. He claims to have forgiven Loki, so why not the rest of the Order? 

At the second door, he taps a long string of numbers into a keypad and passes through. 

And yes, Daddy has his faults. But he loves Loki, or something close to it. The closest that someone can get to loving such a creature. 

Loki pauses in his steps. Love. At the party Thor had almost said that word. Did he mean it? 

Loki shakes his head and resumes walking. Of course not. It was simply a slip of the tongue. Or a trick. Yes, he’s trying to seduce Loki and use him to get to Thanos. And Loki does not like being used. 

But what if he did mean it?

At the third door he sings the entirety of  _ You Don’t Own Me _ and the door slides open. 

But regardless of whether or not Thor loves Loki, it will always be true that Loki unconditionally--

He comes to the last door. Using a finger he draws a classic graffiti dick on the touchpad. It slides open. He walks into the room, stopping at a pedestal in the far corner. Orange light reflects up onto his stony face. 

He’s made a decision. 


	64. Bruise Purple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *hides under a rock and then buries the rock*  
.......  
.....  
....  
...
> 
> *hits 'post chapter'*

Loki gets Nebula to drive him to the hotel. 

When Daddy arrived in Miami he sent Gamora on an information scouting assignment somewhere in Virginia. Nebula managed to get the newly open position as En Dwi’s driver. Loki’s not sure how to feel about the development. On one hand, it makes his life easier to have one less rebel to deal with. On the other hand, he hates Nebula. 

They drive in silence and Loki pointedly ignores each time that Nebula attempts to catch his eye in the mirror. When she pulls up outside the hotel, Loki exits quickly and without any thanks. He takes the steps toward the entrance slowly, putting off what he’s about to do. It feels like betraying his very self. But he’s made his choice. 

He enters, walks through the lobby, and veers left, deciding last minute to take the stairs. By the time he gets to the eighth floor he’s out of breath. He’s not been going to the gym lately in order to maintain Lucky’s thin figure. Straightening his T-shirt and black jeans, he soldiers on with his head held high. As he approaches room number 809, he slicks his hands over his hair and clears his throat twice. Then he knocks.

The door swings open. “Loki.” Thanos doesn’t look surprised to see him.

Loki walks in past the taller man, not bothering to offer his own greeting. Daddy just smirks amusedly. 

“What brings you here, my son?”

“I, uh--” Loki makes the abrupt decision to stall again. “What do you think of the new recruits?” 

Thanos bellows a laugh. 

Loki frowns. “What’s so funny?”

“My dear boy, surely you are not so naive.” 

“Apparently so. What’s funny?”

“I do hope you know I am just humoring you with this stunt.” 

A chill crawls down Loki’s spine. “What?” he whispers.

“I know how you feel about the Odinson. If you think I'd let him join, you're more puerile than I thought.” He steps forward and lifts Loki’s chin with his thick hand. “As soon as I get the Soul, all three of them are dead.” 

Dread and realization seep through Loki. Daddy never intended to even give Thor and the others the chance of joining. He was always going to kill them. He’s just been using them. Using Loki. “But, Daddy--”

“Don’t,” Thanos warns, “speak back to me, boy.” His hand slips down to Loki’s throat. The bobbing of Loki’s adam’s apple doesn’t shift his hold. “I grow tired of this insolence.” 

Loki knows that tone. It’s the one that makes his breathing go tight, makes his toes clench, makes his eyes blur over with a childhood instinct to dissociate. 

Daddy’s fingers tighten in response. He uses his free hand to take his phone from his pocket and press a button. Classical music pours loudly from a speaker on the coffee table. He sets his phone down to pet Loki's hair. 

“We can’t have the neighbors hearing what a squealing pig you sound like.”

Then Loki is listening to the seams of his clothing rip as his face is pressed into the musty couch. 

*******

Loki stares numbly up at the stained ceiling. It looks like spoiled cottage cheese. A hand caresses his face and he doesn’t have the energy to flinch. 

“Never forget, my child. Daddy gives it all because he loves you the most.” Thanos straightens and begins redressing. He doesn’t look at Loki as he does up the last buttons on his bruise purple shirt. “I expect you to be gone by the time I return. Nebula will be out front to collect you.” With that, he walks out the door.

Loki lays there for a long time, his mind struggling to come back from the place it goes off to when Daddy takes too long to cum. He walks the paths that take him to the edge of the world. He stands there alone, wondering what it would be like to fall from the edge, drift in endless space forever. Would it be peaceful?

The thought of Thanos returning and what he would do if Loki was still here is what gets him to move. He starts by shifting his leg and has to stifle a scream. It feels like a match striking down his spine, leaving fire in its wake. 

Daddy must really be angry. He’s only this rough when Loki does something really bad. 

Eventually, he manages to maneuver himself into a sitting position. He locates his clothes and pats his pockets to make sure it’s - good, it’s still there. He gingerly slides his limbs back into his ripped pants and stretched out shirt, attempting to arrange them into a presentable outfit. He doesn’t think he’s very successful. He takes standing up slowly, tries to just breathe through it. He’s learned that’s about all you can do. 

His ears are still ringing from the head splitting concoction of classical music, Daddy’s ugly grunts, and his own muffled screams. 

Loki finds himself walking down a hallway lined with unsightly puce carpeting. He doesn’t fully remember leaving the room. He takes it one step at a time, attempting to minimize his limp. He absently pulls his zipper up again. It keeps sliding down. The button is lying somewhere on the floor of Daddy’s room. He coughs. His throat is searing from the strain of being constricted by thick fingers--

He comes to a stop in front of a door with a number on it. 701. He must have come down the elevator. Or the stairs, he’s not sure which it was. He tries to remember why he came to this room. 

He hears the words of a memory echo inside his head. ‘ _ You don’t deserve to be choked! _ ’ The voice sounds like Thor. 

Loki bangs his palm once against the door. 

“Who is it?” comes a muffled response.

“Just open the goddamn door.” Loki’s voice sounds hollow and rough to his own ears.

The door swings inward, causing Loki to stumble forward. He’d forgotten to take his hand off the door. 

Steve catches him with a hand on his shoulder. “Woah.”

Loki jerks back from the touch. It feels too much like thick hands roaming his body, holding him down, cramming into him--

“Loki?”

He looks up to find Tony standing close behind Steve, whose face is an odd contradiction of suspicion and concern. As Loki’s eyes focus, he also sees Brunnhilde, Bruce, and - he ducks his head again. Thor is looking at him and it makes Loki feel vulnerable and naked. Even his flesh has been peeled away, nothing left to conceal the rot inside. 

“Hey, Loki,” Tony says tentatively. “You, uh, you okay?”

“I'm fine.” He means it to be a growl, but it feels more like a wheeze. He coughs and it helps. “Don’t I keep telling you that?”

“So why are you here, then?” Brunnhilde asks.

Loki meets her gaze for a long moment before his eyes slide helplessly, guiltily to Thor. Their eyes connect and it decimates the last of his ability to keep the truth from his face. Loki knows why he came here. 

Then Thor is rushing forward and wrapping Loki up in the most devastating embrace he’s ever experienced. It feels so antithetical to Daddy’s hold, offering strength instead of forcing weakness. It confirms the horrifying truth that Loki has gone years just accepting what Thanos will give him. Years of absorbing the pain, believing that was the only version of love he would ever experience. 

The way Thor holds him now makes Loki terrifyingly aware of all the cracks running through his body. The strength of those arms squeezes closed the fissures to reveal for but a moment what it feels like to be whole. 

But Loki falls to pieces anyway. 

*******

Thor and the others are lounging about the hotel room when they hear a loud bang against the door. They all glance at each other in alarm before Steve cautiously calls out, “Who is it?”

“Just open the goddamn door.”

At the sound of Loki’s voice, Thor is standing immediately. How does Loki even know what hotel they’re in, let alone what room? Thor scoffs at himself. Of course Loki knows. He makes a living collecting information he’s not supposed to have. 

When Steve opens the door, Loki falls in. Thor jerks forward automatically, but Steve has already caught him. When Loki straightens up, though, Thor freezes. 

Loki’s eyes are haunting. His eyelids look stretched and pinned wide, the green of his irises overtaken by the voids of his pupils, despite the bright lights that surround them. They exude a paranoia and yet they’re glazed, refusing to focus on the movement before them. They’re the eyes of a child trapped in the infested dark. 

Thor fearfully lowers his gaze to the rest of Loki, terrified of what he will find. Loki’s clothes are ripped and stretched, his hair is a matted rope twisted to the side of his head. His entire body is quivering and there’s an odd cant to his left leg. And - Thor swallows back a growl - there are bruises surfacing on his throat. 

It leaves no doubt in Thor’s mind who is responsible for this. 

And then Loki is reeling back from Steve, breathing verging on hyperventilation. Thor’s own breathing has stopped completely, along with all other motor functions. He doesn’t want to move for fear of making things worse. Just what happened to Loki to leave him like this? There’s something itching at the back of Thor’s mind and he flinches back from it reflexively. 

Tony asks the question Thor can’t seem to get past his lips. “Hey, Loki. You, uh, you okay?”

“I’m fine. Don’t I keep telling you all that?” It’s the most unconvincing that a lie of Loki’s has ever sounded.

Thor hears Bruce whisper to Steve, “Is this a trick?”

“So why are you here then?” Brunnhilde asks.

Loki looks at her for a moment before his gaze shifts, achingly, to Thor. Their eyes connect and it sends a jolt through Thor. He can see in Loki’s face that child in the dark, lost and desperate to find shelter from the monsters that swarm his dreams. It breaks some dam within Thor and instantly he’s rushing forward to gather Loki into the embrace that he’s been wanting to give him for weeks. 

As soon as Thor’s arms are around him, Loki goes limp, letting Thor take all of his body weight. He buries his face in Thor’s neck and lets go. Thor holds him through it as the thin body in his arms is wracked with sobs. The kind of sobs that sound like they’re being ripped from the esophagus. The kind that sound like agony. 

It doesn’t last long. Soon, Loki is hiccoughing, trying to get himself under control. He pushes against Thor’s chest and, contrary to what feels right, Thor lets him go.

“What happened to you?” Brunnhilde’s voice shakes.

Loki tries to take a step away from Thor, but his legs seem to give out as a wince contorts his face and he latches back onto Thor’s shirt. Thor’s hands hover in the air, wanting nothing more than to help somehow but fearful that he’ll just make it all worse.

A loud creak cuts through the room as the door swings open once more. Everyone but Loki looks over to find Clint and Natasha in the doorway. They both stop short as they take in the scene before them, eyes lingering on Loki’s torn clothing. 

“Oh, Loki.” Natasha whispers. 

Loki flinches, training his gaze on the ring hanging from Thor’s neck. 

“What the hell is going on?” Tony cuts in. “Clint? Nat? You guys know something about this?” He goes unanswered. 

Natasha takes an aborted step toward Loki. “Do you still not see,  _ Malysh? _ _ Eto ne lyubov.”  _

Loki pants as he braces himself on Thor’s chest. The tightening of his fingers is the only indication that he’s heard her. When he looks up, it’s at Thor. “Did you mean it?”

Thor doesn’t know what Loki is referring to, but he knows there’s only one answer he can give when Loki looks at him that way. “Yes.” 

Loki looks like he might cry again. Instead, he pulls a small pouch from his pocket and presses it to Thor’s palm. As his fingers slip through Thor’s and green bores into blue, something passes between them that Thor can’t quite identify. Then Loki is gone, rushing past Natasha and out of the room. Thor drops the pouch to the floor without a thought, all focus on moving his feet fast enough to follow after Loki. 

Clint stops him with a strong hand on his shoulder. “Let him go.”

Thor turns an incredulous glare on Clint. It slips away when he sees the grim sadness in the man’s eyes. Thor looks at Natasha. She hasn’t moved. Her eyes hold the same look as Clint’s. 

Thor steps back and, contrary to everything inside him, lets Loki go.

Feeling numb and awful, he turns and watches as Bruce picks up the pouch from the floor. Thor remains by the door as the others all move closer to see what’s inside. From the folds of velvet Bruce pulls out an orange jewel the size of an apricot. 

“What? Why would Loki give us a jewel?” Brunnhilde puzzles. 

Natasha frowns. “I don’t know.”

Clint cocks his head. “Doesn’t seem like Loki’s taste.”

“That thing’s gotta be worth millions,” Tony whistles. “If it’s real.” 

“He can’t have gotten that legally,” Steve mutters uncertainty. 

Thor can’t even scrounge up a reaction to the damn thing, his mind still lost in Loki’s anguished eyes. 

A sharp intake of breath announces Bucky’s arrival in the doorway. He’s staring at the jewel as thought it’s a grenade. 

“The Soul.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you still not see, Malysh? Eto ne lyubov. = Do you still not see, Little One? This is not love.


	65. A Beautiful Morning

“So is Loki on our side now?” 

“She must be,” Tony asserts. “Why else would she give us the Soul?”

Bruce looks unconvinced. “What if it’s a trap?”

“But why would he give us something as important as the Soul just for a trap?” Brunnhilde points out. “That’d be crazy”

“That guy’s brain is a bag full of cats,” Bruce huffs. “You can smell the crazy on him.” 

“Have care how you speak.” It’s the first Thor has involved himself in the conversation. He glares warningly at Bruce. 

“You are asking the wrong questions,” Natasha cuts in. 

Steve sits back and crosses his arms. “So what’s the right question?”

Thor slams a hand on the table. “What happened to Loki to leave him like that? Clint, Natasha, you know. I know you do. Why are you protecting that mad man?”

Clint snorts. “We’re not protecting Thanos, idiot. We’re protecting Loki.” 

“How is covering for Loki’s tyrannical father protecting him?”

Natasha levels him with a hard stare. “It is not our information to give.”

“You’re all still focusing on the wrong things.”

They all turn to Bucky.

“What do you mean, Buck?” Steve asks.

Bucky looks from one face to another, hesitating as he always seems to before sharing information with them. He takes a deep breath. “Loki got to the Soul over two weeks ago.” 

“And you’re only just telling us this now?” Bruce frowns. 

“What? What does that mean?” Tony puzzles. 

Brunnhilde furrows her brow. “It means he was trying to make a decision.”

“About what?” Steve tries to catch Bucky’s eye.

“About what to do with it.” Natasha draws a heavy breath. “Give it to Thanos and risk letting you all be killed, give it to you and risk getting killed himself, or take it and leave on his own.” 

Thor perks up. “And he chose to give it to us.”

“So he is on our side now?” Steve clarifies. 

“So it would seem.”

*******

The creature staring back at Loki is something obscene. Its eyes absorb light, deadening the glowing hate. It looks thin, emaciated, mummified ribs tinkling against the glass. The configuration of its parts is wrong. Repugnant. It’s the product of twisting and warping, breaking, ripping, and stitching. It writhes in the dark, rejecting itself in violent calcification and putrefaction. It is the monster parents tell their children about at night. 

Loki tears his eyes from the mirror. He can’t face it any longer. 

Capping his bottle of concealer, he decides that will have to do. The bruises aren’t as bad as they sometimes are. He throws on a scarf for good measure and decides himself ready. As he exits the rooms he turns off the light, leaving the creature trapped inside the mirror veiled in darkness where it belongs. 

*******

Thor wakes to the blaring ring of his phone. He fumbles to answer it. “H’lo?”

“Ah, someone’s sleeping late. You - you know, your brother is just the opposite. Always up early, like a little bird. Cheep cheep.” 

There’s an odd silence as Thor’s exhausted brain tries to understand what is happening. “Oh, ah, yes. Lo - Lucky has always been more of a morning person than me.” It’s a lie. Loki as Thor knew him always slept late. He absolutely hated mornings. He’d stay in bed for half the day if there were no other obligations and he would often convince Thor to stay there with him. 

Upon thinking back on his time with 'Luke', Thor suddenly realizes something. En Dwi isn't flipping out. Which means he must not know that Loki took the Soul. But how--?

“Speaking of our little, ah, bird, he has just finished making himself, mm, lovely for the day. It would be a pity for that to go to waste. So we are going shopping.”

Thor’s mind must still be half asleep because he has absolutely no idea why he is being given this information. “Oh, that sounds,” he clears his throat, “fun.”

“Mm, yes, quite. For we intend to find our wedding regalia! And, as best man, you’re invited too.” 

Thor bolts up in bed. “I’m what?”

“Invited.”

“No, I mean I’m best man?”

“Well, I assume so anyway. You are his, ah, ah, brother. It would be quite co - cold if he chose someone else. I myself am having Topaz as my maid of honor. She will be resplendent. If you hope to have any - any hope of comparing then you should come today. Your friend-ees may come as well.”

“We’ll be there!” Thor rushes to confirm. 

Tony startles awake in his respective bed. “Whossat?” Thor ignores him.

“Ah, good, good. We will be by with the limo in, ah - Pet, when will we be there? - in 30 minutes. Chao.” En Dwi hangs up.

Brunnhilde and Tony are both sitting up in their beds.

“Where exactly are we going to be?”

They manage to get out of bed and ready to go in 25 minutes. They take the elevator down and leave through the front door of the hotel and head toward the curb to wait for the limo. There’s already someone waiting there, though. 

“Beautiful morning, is it not?” Thanos smiles serenely, turning his face up to catch the warm breeze. 

Thor halts in place, every vein in his body constricting and pulsing painfully. The rush of hate that swarms his mind is disorienting. For a moment, all he knows are images of Loki limping and bruised, the phantom ringing of gasped sobs, the clutching of thin, shaking fingers against his chest.

He doesn’t realize he’s advanced toward Thanos until hands on either shoulder stop him. Brunnhilde and Tony look no happier than Thor feels as they hold him in place. Thanos has not yet looked their way. He has his eyes closed and head tilted back, apparently very much appreciating the weather. 

The limo rolls up beside them and the window rolls down. “In.” The window rolls back up with no further greeting from En Dwi. Thanos is the first to step toward the vehicle and open the door. Tony and Brunnhilde follow. After mere seconds of hesitation, Thor forces himself to step in after them. 

As he ducks through the door, Thor’s eyes immediately find Loki. The other man does not look back at him. He’s busy greeting Thanos cheerily, as though the man hadn’t choked and beat him just last night. 

In fact, no traces of Loki’s wrecked state from last night are visible at all. He looks suave and put together as always. It sends a shiver down Thor’s neck. It’s terrifying that Loki is able to put on a mask that so completely covers such torment and pain. But it’s no wonder. If Thanos has been treating Loki this badly since he was 12 years old, then he’s had more than half his life to perfect it. The thought makes Thor feel ill. 

He looks away from Loki and Thanos. If he continues watching Loki smile and laugh with that man, he thinks he actually will puke. 

He looks around at the other people in the limo. Tony has a tight smile on his face and Brunnhilde is actively frowning. They’re clearly disturbed by what’s going on as well. En Dwi and Topaz seem completely oblivious to the tension, busy playing cat’s cradle. They’re both surprisingly good at it. Korg is asleep. 

Bucky, though, is staring straight at Loki and Thanos as the two engage in discussion over what fake relatives will be invited to the fake wedding. Bucky’s face is a careful blank but for his eyes. They’re wide and horrified. He looks like he wants to drag Loki away from the madman as much as Thor does. 

The limo rolls to a stop outside a large white building. En Dwi jumps up and declares with a childish glee, “We’ve arrived! Now, let’s go buy beautiful dresses for Lucky and me.”


	66. Say Yes to Distress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what the hell bridal shop carries these sorts of things, but.... I do what I want.

The store carries extensive attire options for every member of a wedding party. Endless displays of flamboyant dresses decorate the space and swaths of tule are draped from every surface. Their party is lead to a room that has long white couches, champagne, and a large mirror with a pedestal in front of it. Thor wonders if it’s too late to back out of this. 

Korg and Bucky are instructed to stand outside the room and be guard dogs against the media. Meanwhile, En Dwi, Loki, Thanos, Thor, Tony, Brunnhilde, and Topaz file inside the lavish room to sit in a row like they’re on one of those wedding dress reality shows. 

The man who led them to the room has a smile that reminds Thor of a politician. Sam, Thor thinks he said he his name was. “So, who will be going first?”

“Oh, we, uh, we’ll start with the most im - important person in our company. That would be, hum, myself.” En Dwi swans up to Sam. 

Loki rolls his eyes with an amused smile. Thor could swear it's genuine fondness he sees those green eyes. 

“Excellent. Right this way. The rest of you, help yourselves to some champagne while you wait.” Sam leads En Dwi back into the dressing room and then it’s quiet. 

“So, do we think he’s gonna pick something normal, or…?” Tony trails off. No one answers. 

They sit in silence as the seconds tick by. Thor glances at Loki a couple times, but Loki’s eyes remain glued to his phone. 

Finally, En Dwi exits the dressing room. He’s wearing a shockingly sparkly pink penguin suit. As he ascends the pedestal, Tony murmurs, “Called it.”

“Well? Mm, what do you think?” En Dwi spins in a sloppy circle. 

“En, you always look so sexy,” Loki praises. 

Topaz’s face doesn’t change from her usual blank stare. “Looks like a candy wrapper.”

En Dwi gives Topaz a wounded look. “How could it possibly look like a - a candy wrapper? It’s at least 100 times as big as a candy wrapper.” 

“I think it’s too loud for a wedding,” Brunnhilde comments.

En Dwi smiles at her. “Why, thank you for your honest feedback. And look at her. Oh, she - she knows how to dress.” En Dwi nods to himself. “On to the next!” He struts back into the dressing room. 

Next he comes out in a suit entirely covered in sequins. Loki gives more words of praise. Everyone else hates it. Next comes a green leather suit. Loki smiles encouragingly but, upon looking at everyone else’s faces, En Dwi stomps back into the dressing room. Next is a red polka dot suit. Loki declares it his favorite so far. Tony calls it a chicken pox suit. Next is a purple velvet cape. Everyone but Loki agrees it makes him look like a camp bat. Next is a neon blue suit with a ten inch high yellow collar. Even Loki doesn’t bother pretending to like that one. 

“Maybe you should try something a little more,” Tony taps his chin, “classic.”

“Yes, I agree,” Thanos says. It’s the first feedback he’s given. “Perhaps something,” he pauses thoughtfully, “a little like this.” He pulls out his phone.

Thor sees Loki flinch out of the corner of his eye. He turns and finds Loki staring over at the phone in Thanos’s hand with wide, glazed eyes. Thor places his hand on Loki’s arm and Loki’s head snaps toward him. Thor smiles and rubs Loki’s arm. Loki swallows and looks back toward the others. Thor wonders what that was. 

Thanos shows Sam a picture on his phone that has the other man nodding. “Yes, I think you’re right. That would be a perfect look. And what a coincidence! We just got something new in yesterday that's quite similar.” Sam glances at Thor briefly, expression flickering uncertainly before he trots off, supposedly to hunt down this new piece similar to Thanos’s suggestion. He returns a few minutes later carrying a garment bag. En Dwi wastes no time getting back into the dressing room with the new find. 

Soon after, En Dwi twirls out of the dressing room once more. “It think it’s the one!” 

Thor’s stomach does a sickening jolt at the sight. The white suit En Dwi wears is nearly identical to the one Thor wore at his and Loki’s wedding. The one Loki designed. 

“No.”

They all turn to look at Loki. Thanos’s eyes narrow sharply. 

“What? Why?” En Dwi frowns.

Loki pales, though his expression remains impressively even. “I - I just think it's too boring. And you're not boring, are you Darling?”

Loki’s eyes twitch toward Thor. There are the beginnings of panic there. Thor swallows. It’s clear the similarity to Thor’s wedding suit did not go over Loki’s head. But does he dislike it? Or, just maybe, does he not want to see it on another man? 

En Dwi looks in the mirror and considers. “Mm, yes. Perhaps you’re right.” He twirls back toward them. “Besides, my I can’t show up to the wedding in something my fiance doesn’t find, mm, ravishing.” He saunters back into the dressing room with Sam trailing behind him. 

The silence they’re left with this time is a tense one. Thanos is staring straight at Loki with a look made of fire. Thor shifts to sit closer to Loki’s side, subtly backing him up, letting Thanos know that Loki has someone on his side now. 

En Dwi bangs the door of the dressing room open once more. “It’s perfect!” He struts up onto the pedestal and does a spin. He’s wearing a blindingly shiny gold kimono. It’s hideous. 

Loki gasps dramatically. “It certainly is. I think we’ve found the one.” He turns to face the rest of them, eye twitching threateningly. “Don’t you all agree?”

There’s no disagreeing when Loki gives you a look like that. They all hurriedly agree. Thanos merely gives a cool nod. 

“Excellent.” Sam claps his hands together. “Then let’s get you changed and move on to the next person. Who will it be?”

Loki stands abruptly. “Me.” 

“Wonderful. Come with me and we can look at some options to get a feel for what you’re interested in trying on.” 

Thor crosses his arms and huffs as Loki prances off with Sam to look at the endless rows of silk and satin. All this fanfare is so pretentious. Frigga made Thor and Loki’s suits by hand for their wedding. Far more meaningful and special. 

En Dwi exits the dressing room, back in his usual clothes. “Now this is the main event.” He rubs his hands together. “I am so - so looking forward to seeing that, hm, cute little butt all dressed up.” 

En Dwi seems to be unaware of the glares directed at him. 

Loki exits the dressing room minutes later. He’s wearing a fairly standard suit, exactly what you’d expect most men to select for their weddings. 

“Boo!” En Dwi cups his hands around his mouth. “Boo! Boring.”

Thor frowns. That’s no way for a man to treat his fiance. “I think you look absolutely lovely.” 

Loki smiles tightly. “Thank you, Brother. But I value my fiance’s opinion. I will select something more exciting.” He returns to the dressing room.

It’s not silent this time. Instead, they get to listen to En Dwi jabber on about his wedding plans. Everyone releases a relieved breath when Loki finally comes out with the next outfit. He’s wearing a blue suit with yellow tie and pocket square. He pulls it off beautifully. Thor decides to tell him so. 

“You look beautiful.”

Loki glances at Thor. “Why thank you,  _ Brother _ .”

Thor can see Thanos looking at him out of the corner of his eye. He has to suppress a smug smile. Let Thanos see how someone who actually cares about Loki treats him. 

“No, no, no,” En Dwi dismisses. “You would clash with me if you wore that.” 

Loki acknowledges En Dwi’s comment and returns to the dressing room. When he returns, it’s in a floral print suit. 

Thanos frowns. “It makes you look like a girl.” 

Thor frowns too. “I think it looks stunning. There’s nothing wrong with looking feminine.” Thor can’t believe Thanos would say something like that to someone he claims as his child. Well, Thor is going to show him how Loki deserves to be treated. He thinks back to how much Loki loved the dresses he bought with Frigga. He always looked so pretty in them, too. “In fact, I think you could go even more feminine. What about a dress?”

“Oooh, yes!” En Dwi claps his hands together. “My little wifey would look darling in a - a floof skirt.” 

“I don’t think that’s--” 

“I insist,” En Dwi cuts Loki off.

Loki gives a strained smile. “As my darling fiance wishes.” He returns to the dressing room as Sam whisks off in search of dresses for him to try on. The next time Loki steps out of the dressing room, his lean torso is cinched even smaller by a laced bodice, heaps of tulle and lace spilling from his waist to the floor. It’s a ridiculous dress but Loki still manages to look beautiful and elegant in it. 

“You look incredible.” Thor can’t keep the affection from his voice.

*******

Loki thinks Thor must be trying to get them both murdered. He keeps offering compliments and praise, being supportive and caring toward Loki in a way that few ever have. In other words, giving Daddy all the evidence he needs to support his suspicion that Thor and Loki are consorting romantically. The stunt with Thor's wedding suit made that entirely obvious. Showing Sam a picture of Thor from their wedding and somehow getting a suit just like the one Loki designed for him into the store... That's going a long way to make a point, even for Daddy. What he really wanted was to see Loki and Thor's reactions to it. And they did not disappoint. Loki is already walking a thin line right now, what with keeping the fact that he stole away the Soul and replaced it with a jewel from his personal collection a secret from both Thanos and En Dwi. He can't afford to worry about this secret too right now. 

And now Thor is even trying to get Loki to express his damn feminine side. Daddy hates it when Loki is ‘girly’. He says it makes him look ugly. Undesirable. He absolutely hated when Loki played Elle. If he gets an inkling that Loki may be inclined to dress like that outside of jobs, he would not take it well.

En Dwi, on the other hand, is so delighted by the picture Loki makes in his princess gown that he insists everyone in their party must try one on. Sam calls in more help, all of whom arrive loaded up with huge garment bags overflowing with tulle. They begin herding each member of their party off to separate dressing rooms to try them on. 

Amidst the commotion, Loki intercepts the woman attempting to whisk Thor away. “Pardon us, we need to have a word.” With that, he grasps Thor’s arm and hauls him behind a dress display. 

“Loki? What--”

“Just what do you think you’re doing?”

“Um, I was going to go put a dress on, but--”

“No, you great Oaf. What’s with all the compliments?”

Thor looks completely flabbergasted. “I thought you looked nice. So I said so.”

Loki drops his face into his hand. This man is far too sweet for his own good. How has he managed to survive this long? Loki feels Thor’s hand touch his arm and jerks away in exasperation. It turns out to be a bad call, as it causes him to trip over the cascade of fabric around his feet. Thor catches him with an arm around his bodiced waist. Loki doesn’t push him away. 

Instead, he rests his forehead on Thor’s shoulder. “Don’t you see? You’re just giving him ammunition.” 

“For what?” Loki can hear the frown in Thor’s voice.

“To get rid of you.”

Loki feels Thor’s shoulder shift as the man inhales sharply. Long moments go by and Loki begins to get comfortable. Then Thor speaks. “I’m not worried about that. I’m going to support you and show him how you should be treated.” The sheer black and white surety in Thor's voice seems to mock Loki's own inability to be what Thor needs. 

Loki sneers into Thor’s sleeve. “What you're doing, this isn’t helping me. This is the reason that last night--” He catches himself just in time. 

Thor abruptly grabs Loki’s shoulders and pushes him back to look him in the eye. “He did that to you… because of me?” Thor looks distraught. 

Loki bites his tongue, cursing himself for how much Thor doesn’t deserve any of this, how terribly Loki and his disaster of a mind have wrecked him. “No. No, that was because I made him angry. It was my fault--”

“It’s not.” Thor gives Loki a gentle shake. “You could never deserve that kind of treatment.”

Loki’s hit with a bolt of terror. He looks at Thor warily. “What kind of treatment?”

Thor’s brow furrows. “Last night, your throat - the abuse--”

Loki feels himself pale. “What did Nat tell you?” 

“What? Nothing, I--”

“Bucky then.”

“Loki, neither of them told me anything.”

“You’re lying.”

Thor sighs. “He said you often have bruises on your neck but Bab-- Loki, I already figured that out. You always had a thing about your neck. And, well, last night it was pretty obvious. They didn’t need to say anything for me to see that.”

Loki relaxes. 

*******

Thor wonders.

Just what is it that Loki wants so badly to stay hidden? And why would Thor’s compliments toward Loki make it worse? And, most importantly, what can Thor do that will make it stop entirely? The only thing he can think of that would accomplish that for certain is getting Loki away from Thanos for good. 

Loki takes another step back from Thor and smooths his hands over his skirt. “We should get back.” He makes it three steps before Thor can get the words out. 

“Wait. Loki.”

He looks back at Thor.

“Are you on our side now?”

Loki watches him for a moment, smirks “I suppose I’m an equal opportunity traitor.” 


	67. One Word

Thor lounges on his bed and attempts to tune out the scientists tinkering and murmuring to each other. The hotel room has become overrun with Tony and Bruce’s growing collection of computers, wires, and gadgets being used in the pursuit of figuring out how the Soul works. Natasha and Clint have helpfully taken up the role of monetary support in place of Gamora, who they’re still yet to hear from. 

Steve is out, presumably meeting up with Bucky. They’ve been doing a lot of that lately, supposedly to discuss surveillance of Sakaar. Thor’s begun to suspect that Steve has a bit of a crush on the double agent. The sad, longing looks have made Thor see more of a kindred spirit in Steve. Brunnhilde was perhaps not so wrong when she said that the two of them were a lot alike. 

Thor’s thoughts, inevitably, turn once more to the last words Loki said.  _ I suppose I’m an equal opportunity traitor. _ What does that mean? Was he referencing how he ‘betrayed’ Thor and all the other people he tricked? And now he’s and betraying Thanos? Is he truly on their side now? 

“Oh, holy shit. No, no way.” Thor’s troubled thoughts are disrupted by Tony’s muttering. 

“Oh my god,” Bruce’s voice joins in. 

Clint lifts his head from where it was lulling on the back of his chair. “Fuck’s sake, what?”

Bruce looks up at them with wide eyes. “I think… I think we just did it.”

Thor sits up. “You mean, as in--”

“Yeah. We know how the Soul is meant to be harnessed.” 

Natasha is up off of her yoga mat and rushing to look over Tony’s shoulder in seconds. “Show me.”

Tony types a string of code into the computer in front of him and they all watch as the Soul glows with an orange light where it’s sitting inside a glass case with wires running into it. As the glow brightens, information begins scrolling across Tony’s screen. It all looks very sci-fi to Thor. 

“With this port that we’ve built and hooked it into, we’ve managed to get access to the information stored inside the Soul. This includes several key indicators for how to use it, as we can see into the history of what it’s been hooked up to in the past.”

“So that’s it?” Brunnhilde asks, sitting forward in her seat. “We can use it now?”

Tony grimaces. “Well, what we have it hooked into now isn’t what we need to harness it.”

Natasha quirks a brow. “So? I can buy whatever you need.” 

“I’m afraid it’s not that simple,” Bruce removes his glasses and begins polishing them on a cloth. “The Soul’s history only showed it ever being hooked up to two things, one of which was a port similar to the one we have it in now, useful for getting information on and off of it but not for utilizing the Soul for its intended purpose. Which, if Gamora is correct, is controlling the other gems. The other thing to which it’s been hooked up to, though, had no readable data. After some deliberation, we’ve decided this can only mean one thing.” He replaces his glasses and looks around at the people in the room. “We think the Soul needs to be hooked up to a person in order for it to work.”

Thor frowns. “What does that mean?”

“It looks like it’s designed to connect to a human brain,” Tony elaborates. “The thing looks like a clear jewel, but it actually consists of millions of tiny pathways that are structured similarly to the human nervous system. The past connection that’s shown in its history doesn’t read as containing any data because, as advanced as this tech is, it isn’t capable of storing something as complex as what’s contained in the human brain.”

“But how would hooking it up to a person even work?” Clint asks.

Tony and Bruce exchange looks. “We don’t know.”

The call comes after dark. “Be in my office in one hour.” No more is said before Thanos hangs up. 

“What do you think this is about?” Brunnhilde speculates. 

Thor shakes his head. “I don’t know.”

Thor, Tony, and Brunnhilde hurry to get ready and call a cab, as no mention was made of Nebula picking them up. 

“Be on your guard,” Natasha warns. “Use the knowledge you gained of the space the last time you were there to your advantage. It is highly unusual for Thanos to allow people who have not been fully indoctrinated into the Order to step foot into one of their facilities. I am still not convinced that he doesn’t have some nefarious reason for granting you entry.”

The cab drops them out front of the glass and metal building. They try the front door and find it unlocked. Navigating through the extensive halls is disorienting and it takes them a while to find the wing of offices. Once they do, it’s a fairly straight shot. They walk down the corridor, past darkened office after office. No one else appears to be here this time. 

Finally, they pass the last of the small, dark rooms and walk down the short hallway leading to their destination. As they round the corner, they have to blink spots from their eyes as they’re suddenly faced with the bright light pouring through the glass walls of Thanos’s office. As Thor’s eyes clear and manage to focus, he immediately wishes they hadn’t. 

Through the glass wall, he can see Thanos’s back, the muscles in his shoulders shifting sickeningly through his bruise purple shirt. His hips grind forward in sharp pumps, the fabric of his slacks straining with every motion. 

Thanos has a person pinned to the wall, pale skin, long-limbs, and ink black hair spilling from beneath the thick hands holding them there. Thor’s brain processes each of these things individually, slowly attempting to piece them together into something that makes sense. 

“Loki.” 

He doesn’t fully realize who Thanos has pinned until he feels the name formed by his own lips. His mind is awash with a loud buzzing sound that whites out all thought. Through it, he just barely registers Brunnhilde yanking at the door handle, the rattle of a lock keeping it closed.

Thanos has Loki held to the wall as he grinds his clothed hips against the lean man. Loki’s limbs swing like those of an unmanned puppet as he’s jostled over and over. His head lulls to the side as Thanos licks and bites a trail up the column of his throat. The green eyes are hazy and vacant, empty holes in the slack face. 

Thor slams a fist against the glass and Loki’s eyes flash back to life, snapping up to bore into his own. The vacant face morphs into one of horror, pale lips shaping just one word.

“Thor.”


	68. Black Glass

Loki gets the call as he’s lying in bed next to En Dwi. He slinks from beneath the covers and dons a robe instead of wasting time going to the 22nd floor, also known as the ‘closet floor’, to find real clothes. Daddy did not sound to be in a patient mood. 

He doesn’t have to sneak out, Bucky is on guard tonight. As we walks past the stoic man, Bucky’s good arm shoots out to grasp his wrist. 

“Where are you going?”

Loki frowns, doesn’t look back at him. “Daddy called for me.”

“Don’t go.”

Loki shakes the hand away and continues on. Bucky doesn’t follow.

Nebula is waiting with the car out front. They don’t speak as she drives him to the base. As she pulls up at the destination, their eyes meet in the mirror. Loki quickly looks away and steps out of the car. The look in her eyes is the same one he imagines Bucky’s held. 

He navigates the maze of halls quickly, having memorized the route the first time he walked it. He strides down the darkened corridor of offices and through the short hall, turning the corner that brings him to Daddy’s office. The door is open. 

“I’m here.”

Daddy is sitting at his desk, head bent over a computer. He types out several more lines before looking up. “Good. We need to speak.” 

Loki feels a twinge of unease. “About?”

Daddy stands, rounding the desk to stand in front of Loki. He lifts his hand to cup the side of Loki’s face, thumb trailing down to trace his chin. “Do not pretend to be a fool. It makes you most unattractive.” 

Loki shivers, suppressing the urge to pull his robe more tightly shut. He’s regretting the decision to forgo more concealing clothes. Daddy seems to be in a dangerous mood.

“I am not a fool either. I know they seek to turn you against me.”

Loki shakes his head vigorously, accidentally dislodging Daddy’s hand as he does so. Thanos scowls, grabbing Loki’s chin twice as hard, nails digging into the skin there. 

“Do not lie to me, boy.”

Loki swallows convulsively, fighting down panic. “They want to join the Order,” he insists.

Daddy takes a step forward, then another, and another, herding Loki until his back hits the wall. 

“I have let them play their little game. They may try all they want to take what is mine.” He strokes his hand down Loki’s neck. “They will not succeed.” 

Loki bites his lip to keep it from trembling. 

“For you are a faithful son, are you not?” Daddy lifts Loki’s chin and leans close to bring their gazes together. “You would never betray me.”

Daddy pushes their mouths together, kissing Loki with lips and tongue. Loki squeezes his eyes shut and holds his breath. Daddy always tastes like scotch. Loki hates scotch. 

Thanos breaks away to kiss down Loki’s neck, nipping and sucking at the skin. He grabs fistfuls of the robe, hiking it up around Loki’s waist. A thick hand wraps around Loki’s thigh, lifting it as wide as the joint will go without breaking. Loki’s head lulls to the side as Thanos shoves his rigid length against the juncture of hip and thigh, the fabric of his slacks chafing against the bare skin there. Another hand twists into Loki's hair, yanking his head back to expose more neck. Daddy has always liked his neck. 

Loki falls limp. It’s the only way to keep himself from struggling. Daddy hates it when he struggles. 

Loki walks the familiar paths in his mind that lead him to the place where he goes, the place he made for himself. There is no one else there, only stars and darkness. He floats alone in a sea of empty, drifting away from all that he can’t escape.

A sound like a fist on glass snaps his mind back to reality. His eyes immediately focus in on the one person who he’d vowed would never know of this. 

“Thor.”

The look in his love’s eyes is wretched, disgusted, horrified. Loki’s mind screams. He pushes at Daddy, attempting to get away, make him stop. Thor cannot see him like this. Thor cannot  _ know _ . 

Then Daddy’s hand is around his throat, cutting off the air and the blood. Loki should have known better. Daddy hates it when he struggles. 

“Tell me, Loki. Is your loyalty to me stronger than your love for that boy?”

Loki nods and nods. 

“And I believe that. But I cannot risk you running off with some poor fool who thinks you are what he wants.”

Loki can’t look away from Thor, even as his eyes water from the lack of oxygen, his ears ring from the lack of blood. He writhes against the hand, feet kicking and hands grasping at the thick fingers around his throat. 

“He will never look at you the same way now. Every time he sees you, he will see this.” Daddy emphasizes the words with a harsh thrust of his hips. “Now he knows who you really belong to.” He leans in close to Loki’s ear. “So I will make you a deal. If you stay faithful to me, I will let him live.” He licks a line up Loki’s cheek. “Say it.”

Loki stops struggling, Daddy’s voice trickling through like ice in his veins. Loki had just begun to think that he could have another life. One outside of the Order, away from this kind of treatment. One with Thor. But if he were to take the chance, Thanos would undoubtedly find them. And when he did, he would kill them all. And now Daddy is offering to spare Thor. At the cost of Loki remaining in the Order, giving up the hope of another life...

Loki’s life in exchange for Thor’s. 

Thor is banging on the glass. Loki thinks he’s shouting too, but the noise won’t make it inside the soundproof room. 

Daddy’s hand tightens. He speaks right against Loki’s ear. “Say it or I’ll make him watch.” 

Loki’s mind comes to a halt. He looks at Thor, sees the tears on his cheeks, the terror in his eyes. 

Loki looks at Daddy. Nods. 

The hand releases and lowers him back to the floor. Thick fingers smooth Loki’s hair back from where it was mussed in the struggle. Daddy looks down at him expectantly. 

Loki sucks in a breath to calm his searing throat and pushes up on his toes, pressing his mouth to Daddy’s. Sealing the deal. The rumble of approval he’s met with reverberates through his bones, clacking them together. Daddy pulls back and holds his wrist up, the one with the smartwatch. Loki takes the reward for what it is and presses the button on the watch screen. He watches Thor’s face disappear as the glass walls darken, shielding them from view as Daddy pushes him back against the wall. 

*******

Thor shouts himself hoarse as Loki struggles against Thanos. He beats and claws at the glass, all coherent thought abandoning him as the instinct to get to Loki takes over. 

Loki’s eyes haven’t left Thor’s once and it’s breaking his heart. Even as he’s choked and molested, Loki doesn’t look away from Thor. 

Until he does. And then he’s kissing Thanos. 

Thor wails as the glass walls go black.


	69. 6:02AM

Thor’s fists continue to berate the glass even as his knees collide with the tile floor. He doesn’t know how long he’s been yelling. He doesn’t know what else to do. No sound penetrates the glass walls. They can’t hear him. And he can’t hear them. Or see them. It’s almost like the entire scene was just a nightmare born of his own mind. But the gaping holes in his chest tell him otherwise. 

“Thor, come on buddy. You’re gonna hurt yourself, man.” Tony’s voice filters through the white noise in Thor’s head without meaning. 

The distant echo of Brunnhilde sobbing doesn’t even fully register. 

The click of a gun cocking is what finally succeeds in calling his attention from the silent, darkened glass. He turns his head to find a pistol aimed at his skull. It’s held by Proxima, the woman they met the first time they came here. 

“I think it’s time you three skipped on home.” 

Thor has a thought to ignore her, go back to banging on the glass. But then he looks at his friends. Brunnhilde and Tony both have miles of tear tracks lining their faces. And behind them stand Ronan and Ebony, pistols aimed at each of their heads.

Thor stands stiffly, his body protesting the movement and mind rejecting the intent. He grinds his teeth together and looks back at the opaque glass wall one last time before turning and walking back the way they came. 

The Black Order agents escort them at gunpoint all the way to the entrance, where Nebula waits outside with the car. The three of them climb in and watch through the rearview mirror how the guns remain pointed even as Nebula drives them away. 

When they turn the corner and lose sight of the Black Order base, Thor shifts his gaze to the back of Nebula’s neck. “Do you know what he does to Loki?” 

Nebula does not answer. 

“Have you seen how he treats him? Have you seen how dead Loki’s eyes look when he--”

Silence.

“Do you feel good about yourself?” he snarls. “Can you live with this? Protecting and serving a man who would rape someone who he calls ‘son’?”

He doesn’t find out whether Nebula would have responded to that. He’s already lost in flashes of Loki writhing and choking, Thanos grinding and licking, the boom-boom-boom of fists on glass. The car is filled with the sound of Loki’s sobbing. 

Oh. No. It’s not Loki who’s sobbing. 

Hands find either one of Thor’s. He looks up to find his friends on each side of him, Tony and Brunnhilde both offering comfort even through their own shock. Thor squeezes their hands as hard as he can and selfishly accepts their help.

The knock comes at 2:43am. 

None of them have slept. Brunnhilde has focused her eyes and mind on something outside the window. Tony has recounted everything they witnessed. Steve and Bruce have listened to it all in horror. Clint and Natasha have listened with resigned sadness. 

Thor hasn’t blinked for fear of what he will see behind his eyelids. 

The knock comes at 2:43am. 

Thor is sure of the time because he looks at his watch and thinks of Loki pressing the button on Thanos’s smartwatch. He thinks of the way Loki kissed Thanos with eyes belonging to a funeral march. He thinks of how Loki’s eyes never left his, until they did. 

He says aloud, “This is the worst day of my life. Is this every day of Loki’s?”

No one responds. 

The knock comes again at 2:44am. 

Thor hears the bang-bang-bang and thinks of boom-boom-boom, fists pounding on a glass wall. 

Bruce answers the door. Loki walks in past him without a word and stands in the center of the room. 

Thor looks up from his slump on the floor. He feels a fool. 

Loki looks down at him. “You look so ugly when you cry.” 

Then strong, lean arms are around Thor and he’s burying his face in the chest containing the most beloved heart in all the worlds. 

He cries in Loki’s arms for a long time. “I should be comforting you,” Thor finally manages. And then he’s crying again. 

Eventually, they move to the bed. Everyone else has retired to their own mattresses. Thor thinks it’s their effort to give he and Loki privacy. The light is turned out and Thor remembers the glass walls going dark. Loki curls around his back and presses his face to the shorn hair there. It feels to Thor like new sprouts emerging from a prairie fire. 

“How long?” Thor asks. He doesn’t think Loki will answer. Not sure he wants him to.

“Since I was 12,” Loki whispers. 

Thor cries. 

Loki falls asleep at 4:12am. Thor knows because he feels the change in his breathing. He lays there listening to it puff against his ear, feels the expansions of it against his back. 

Thor doesn’t sleep.

Loki wakes again at 5:27am. Thor knows because the long, pale fingers pull at him until he’s rolling to face Loki. 

Thor traces the lines of Loki’s face with his eyes, his hand slipping back to finger the Inguz rune hiding amidst the raven hair. He can’t decipher what the expression on Loki’s face means. 

Long fingers grasp the side of Thor’s neck and pull him close. Loki nudges Thor’s nose with his own. Thor stops Loki with calloused fingers on thin lips. 

“You don’t have to do that.”

“Please,” Loki says. 

And Thor could never say no to him. He closes the short distance and presses his lips to Loki’s as softly as he knows how. The sound Loki makes is the most beautiful thing Thor has ever heard. 

Thor wakes at 6:02am. 

He knows the bed is empty before he looks. He knows because he’s sweating. Loki’s body temperature is frigid. Thor never sweats when he shares a bed with Loki. 

“Oh, no, no, no, no.” Tony’s voice clambers into Thor’s sleep-fogged mind. 

“What is it?” Natasha asks as she pushes the covers from her face. 

Thor sits up and Tony glances at him with sorry eyes. It makes Thor’s stomach clench.

“The Soul is gone.”


	70. Fenris

Loki remembers the first thing he ever treasured. It was a ring with snakes etched into it. He found it in the dirt at the park where he used to play alone as a young child. He believed that it gave him magical powers. He told Helbindi once that he intended to use it to find the place where he truly belonged. 

That same ring now hangs from Thor’s neck. It would seem the ring succeeded in finding that place. It just failed to take Loki there with it. 

The second thing Loki ever treasured came much later. It was a stuffed wolf named Fenris, a gift from his father. Not the father who sired him. No, that father never gave him a toy. It was the father who took Loki in and told him he was worth something. The one who valued Loki’s talent for mischief rather than cursing him for it. The one who he would come to know as Daddy. 

But Fenris did not remain Loki’s either. Daddy took him away when Loki got ‘too old to be playing with toys.’ Now, as Loki walks away from the only person who he has ever wished to truly possess, while holding an object he has never desired, he finds himself reminded of Fenris. 

*******

“Why would he take the Soul back when he was the one who gave it to us in the first place?”

“Obviously she changed her mind about what side she wants to be on.”

“But why would he want to side with that tyrant? I mean, we saw first hand how he treats Loki. Who would choose to stay in those conditions?”

“Well he seemed pretty intent on not betraying the Order until just recently. Perhaps his change of heart was short lived.”

“I say we go confront him and ask him to his face.”

Thor doesn’t participate in the discussion swirling through the room. Instead, he’s looking at the pillow where Loki’s head rested alongside his own last night. There’s still a sloppy imprint there. It’s impossible to tell whether it’s the shape of their nestled heads or merely mussed from where Thor jostled it upon waking. 

There’s a knock on the door. This time Thor hurries to be the one to open it. Maybe Loki changed his mind. Maybe it was a misunderstanding. Maybe he just needed to borrow the Soul in order to--

“Mmm, hello.” 

Thor’s face drops. “Mr. Gast.”

“And a, uh, good morning to you.” En Dwi’s eyes trail lecherously down Thor’s bare torso as he greets him.

“Hey there, Thor. Long time no hang,” Korg grins cheerfully over En Dwi’s shoulder. Topaz beside him gives no indication that she’s noticed Thor at all. 

Channeling every ounce of patience and will power he has, Thor attempts to be polite. “What brings you here?”

“Ah, yes, that. Well, you may have noticed my fiance has gone missing.” 

Thor feels like he’s had all the air knocked out of him. 

“Yes, quite inconvenient, as you can imagine. But-- oh! Is that Brucey? Hello Bruce. So this is where you went after I fired you.” En Dwi smiles jovially. 

Bruce clears his throat from somewhere behind Thor. “Ah, yes. Hello, Mr Gast.” 

“An - anyway, back to what I was saying. What was I saying? Oh, yes, yes, Lucky. Quite gone.”

Thor shuffles his feet. “Is that so?”

“Oh, don - don’t be coy, now. He’s gone. And he won’t be coming back. I know it, you know it, and - oh, yes, this is important - he has my gem.” 

Thor swallows. “G - gem?”

En Dwi sighs dramatically. “Can we ple - please just skip all of this,” he flaps his hand around. “I know he works for the - the Black Order and I know you are, uh, not his brother.”

Thor’s eyes goggle. How does En Dwi know about the Black Order? And he knows about Loki? 

“It’s okay. He’s with me.” 

Thor blinks. That sounded like--

Gamora steps into the doorway and grins roguishly. “Long time no see.”

*******

Loki walks across the airstrip with unhurried strides, turning his face upwards to experience the last rays of Miami sun before returning to rainy country. He won’t be seeing anything golden for quite a long time. 

The airstair creaks slightly as he ascends. When he reaches the top, he hands his hat off to the attendant. He doesn’t hand the case off. 

Inside, the jet is upholstered in deep purple. Proxima and Ebony sit along the left side of the cabin, Corvus and Ronan along the right. Loki ignores all of them and looks to the man seated at the very back of the jet. 

“I have it.” 

“That’s my boy.”


End file.
